Reckless is one word that comes to mind
November 7, 2007 9:30 AM   Subscribe! From the makers of OKCupid! comes a website where you set up dates with people that you are not allowed to see or communicate with before hand.

I can't wait for idea via #mefi
posted by Stynxno (42 comments total) 13 users marked this as a favorite
Once when waiting tables in a fine dining establishment, we had a woman come in who was there for a meeting with a service called, "It's Just Lunch". The idea is that you set up a date and time through the service, and they place the reservation for you, instructing the restaurant that the check is to be split in advance to avoid embarassment/negotiation. That way, you and your prospective partner meet up for lunch, and if things don't workout then hey, it's just lunch, right?

So this woman comes in and she is just drop dead gorgeous. Probably in her 40s and turning heads all over the place. Classy clothes, fashionable, engaging, lively. She sits down and orders a nice glass of wine and awaits her beau.

The gentleman she's meeting comes in a bit later, introduces himself at the host stand as the other "It's Just Lunch" attendee, and is shown to the table.

Never in the world of online dating has there been a worse mismatch. A far cry from the elegant and stylish woman he was there to meet, he is literally wearing denim overalls over a plaid flannel shirt. I shit you not. "Potato faced" doesn't even begin to describe him. Knob nose, knotty hands, the whole deal...this guy literally looks like he could have been working the thresher that very morning.

Now, not to denigrate the fine workers of the agricultural industry, of which there are many in Minnesota, but this was in a suburb of the cities and the two could not have been more incompatible. The look on her face when he introduced himself was priceless- pale and shocked. They sat down and engaged in some cursory chit-chat, which was obviously stilted and hampered by her furious attempts to cover her absolute mortification. It was quite obvious that he was aware. It was quickly discovered that they had nothing whatsoever in common, other than certain biological propensities for eating, breathing, and such.

She proceeded to have several glasses of wine. Several. The gentleman excused himself from the table to use the facilities, and she jumped on the opportunity. She hurried over to the host stand and pleaded with the hostess, "Please dear, I need to get out of this now! I'm going to go back over there and sit down, when he gets back come over and tell me that I have an urgent phone call. I'll go back, tell him it's my daughter and that there's an emergency, and that I have to leave. I'll leave cash for the waiter."

The hostess was reluctant, but the woman's sheer desperation was unerringly persuasive. She played her part in the scheme, which was doubtless quite transparent to the poor gentleman. She made all of her bullshit excuses and left in quite a hurry.

He sat alone and drank some beer for a while. Otherwise, it must have been a good meal.
posted by baphomet at 9:44 AM on November 7, 2007 [24 favorites]

I was going to say something, but Stynxno said it better.
posted by small_ruminant at 9:45 AM on November 7, 2007

God, I feel terrible for that guy. I wanna buy him a beer or six.
posted by aramaic at 9:47 AM on November 7, 2007 [2 favorites]

Actually there was a story a while back about girls who met a guy on myspace and tried to rob him.
posted by delmoi at 9:49 AM on November 7, 2007

Now see in order to make this cool and "web 2.0" what we need is a way to have people vote on pair-ups (maybe on pair ups in other cities, so they don't know who's in their pool).

Then, the daties would post blog entries about how it went. Now that would be fun.

The other thing, is I wouldn't setup the service in NY, SF, or Austin. sometimes people who don't live in hipster meccas need to get laid too, you know.
posted by delmoi at 9:52 AM on November 7, 2007 [4 favorites]

baphomet: that is a wonderful story, particularly given the It's Just Lunch! ads which run on the teevee in my fair city. In fact, your story is just the scenario the IJL! ads promise to prevent.
posted by crush-onastick at 9:53 AM on November 7, 2007

Cheating on your spouse just got that much easier!
posted by DU at 9:55 AM on November 7, 2007

I heard about this last night, and my love of ill-advised ideas won out over little trifles like survival instinct and dignity, so I started filling out their forms. I got maybe halfway through the process before being told that you need to have a cell phone in order to participate.

posted by Greg Nog at 9:56 AM on November 7, 2007 [3 favorites]

I had a friend who did It's Just Lunch in SF. Like in baphomet's story, his 'matches' weren't exactly the best (though not as wildly inappropriate as in baphomet's story). But the women kept sleeping with him after the first meeting. It happened three times in a row, IIRC, and he claims that he wasn't pressuring the women. It was bizarre--my friends and I became suspicious that IJL was setting him up with pre-paid escorts hoping that his 'luck' would keep him on as a client.
posted by mullacc at 10:01 AM on November 7, 2007

I want to go on a date with King Kong. Fix.
posted by carmina at 10:03 AM on November 7, 2007

Craig's List, v2 ?
posted by HuronBob at 10:11 AM on November 7, 2007

delmoi: Sounds like a Love Connection 2.0 revival.
posted by ALongDecember at 10:14 AM on November 7, 2007

Great! I needed a new way to shamelessly meet strangers for bouts of anonymous, passionless coffee!
posted by Marquise at 10:27 AM on November 7, 2007 [3 favorites]

Group dating coming soon: Sparkker
posted by adamms222 at 10:52 AM on November 7, 2007

Cheating on your spouse just got that much easier!
Yeah, till you turn up and it's your other half on the date.
posted by essexjan at 11:00 AM on November 7, 2007

Yes I like Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain
posted by wheelieman at 11:25 AM on November 7, 2007 [1 favorite]

On the internet, nobody knows you're a 350 pound furry.
posted by chlorus at 11:25 AM on November 7, 2007 [3 favorites]

And we prefer to keep it that way.
posted by Dr-Baa at 11:35 AM on November 7, 2007

Not me. Roar.
posted by jmd82 at 12:06 PM on November 7, 2007 [1 favorite]

Damn. No Toronto on the list.
posted by dobbs at 12:12 PM on November 7, 2007

I'd think it be easier just to get smashing drunk every night and just see where I wake up.
posted by MiltonRandKalman at 12:18 PM on November 7, 2007 [1 favorite]

I will report Monday as to my adventure.
posted by parmanparman at 12:36 PM on November 7, 2007

This sounds like just the thing for me, but I don't really want to date crazy blind people. Can anyone suggest a less exclusive site?
posted by googly at 1:14 PM on November 7, 2007 [3 favorites]

where you set up dates with people that you are not allowed to see or communicate with before hand

But I can firewall them by skin color, religion, and height beforehand. Which makes it... just another e-dating site, no?
posted by kid ichorous at 1:53 PM on November 7, 2007

Finally, a web site for all the people who would be rejected due to their looks or personality!
posted by grouse at 2:04 PM on November 7, 2007 [2 favorites]

So Stynxno got the email announcing this site this morning too, I suppose?
posted by cmgonzalez at 2:41 PM on November 7, 2007

I have to admit that I joined this last night.
I like that you can choose to double with someone you know (a friend and I signed up together), but I don't think I would go on one solo.
The blurry pixelated snapshots of the people on the site are kind of funny.
I have to admit that it is pretty skeezy that you can specify that your date starts at 3am.

(And there were no dates for us last night from 7 pm to 11 pm, if you were wondering. Maybe more than 5 people need to join first.)
posted by rmless at 3:04 PM on November 7, 2007

Double dates sound fun! Though the fights over who gets who could be ugly. But fun!
posted by Wood at 3:05 PM on November 7, 2007

I think I may actually try this. I've never been on a blind date before. But I wish I had a single or insane enough friend who'd be willing to do this with because I admit, I'm kind of scared. I guess as long as I don't set the date parameters as "4 a.m., by the docks" I'll be ok? Guys?
posted by kkokkodalk at 3:16 PM on November 7, 2007

I can't tell you how many times I was browsing the profiles on OKcupid, and thought to myself, "If ONLY there more unattractive and completely insane people on here to choose from."
posted by empath at 3:16 PM on November 7, 2007 [3 favorites]

My buddy and I signed up. I'll let you know all about our adventures. Thank Good thing the pics are blurry, now we have a fightin' chance!
posted by Mach3avelli at 4:43 PM on November 7, 2007

Apparently my brain couldn't decide between "Thank God" and "good thing."
posted by Mach3avelli at 4:44 PM on November 7, 2007

kkokkodalk - 4 a.m., by the docks is when it’s all get going on. I’m taking on some big gorilla there and then meeting some Asian chick. (I’m fighting Zangief in a factory at about 2) I’m going to ask her if she’s woman enough to date with me.

I got set up on a blind date once. It doesn’t work for me because I have a wacky sense of humor. I mean, there are things in life you can only pull off under certain very limited sets of circumstances. We sat down. We talked. I mentioned I was working on my masters and she asked why I took time off college and I said “well, after I got out of the joint I had to deal coke to get back on my feet.”
And then of course explained that, no, I was in the military and hadn’t been to jail or delt cocaine. I don’t think she believed me. After that the date went kind of south, but really, it was worth it to see the look on her face. I mean, that kind of joke you just can’t pull off any other time.

On our first date with my (then future) wife I pretended to be afraid of heights. Almost came to tears when we were on a ferris wheel (real tear-type tears because I was trying not to laugh, she didn’t know that of course) and she was very nice keeping me calm while I was doing my Shatner/Lithgow Nightmare at 20,000 Feet impression. A few months later was the payoff. She casually mentioned my fear of heights to my mom who said “Smedley? He rappels and parachutes all the time. He loves heights. Has ever since he was a child climbing trees and...” and of course I had the sheepish ‘heh heh’ grin on my face. She laughed. We’re pretty much made for each other really.
Only problem is she sees right through everything now. I mean I’ve set up some damned clever things and it’s like she’s psychic. It’s not like I’m trying to con her or cheat on her, just want to pull off a surprise to make her laugh. I suppose you’re ultimately transparent to the people you truly love who love you.

I don’t know man, seems to me this is sort of a brownian motion method to find someone you can be with. I can’t imagine any method is foolproof or that anything will keep the right two people apart (well, herpes maybe, but that comes and goes).
posted by Smedleyman at 5:04 PM on November 7, 2007 [4 favorites]

Well, now I'm signed up for it. Ha, we'll see how this goes.
posted by kkokkodalk at 5:56 PM on November 7, 2007

What could go wrong?
posted by al_fresco at 9:30 PM on November 7, 2007

Are you feeling adventurous?

Lately? No. No, I am not.

BTW, that "It's Just Lunch" story reminds me of a story my ex boyfriend told me a few years ago. He was hanging out at a friend's restaurant (an upscale Italian restaurant in Beverly Hills) and some guy showed up for an "It's Just Lunch" date. He decided to sit at the bar while waiting for the woman he was set up with, who apparently ended up being quite lovely. Anyhow, he sat down, ordered a drink, and promptly started reading a porn magazine. Apparently the bartender started talking to him and even said, "Are you sure you want to be reading that here? Especially when you're about to make a first impression on a woman?" Apparently he didn't take the hint. People at the restaurant felt so badly for the woman after she showed up that they actually helped her get rid of the guy and gave her a free glass of wine.
posted by miss lynnster at 11:05 PM on November 7, 2007 [1 favorite]

This will end well; or with crabs.
posted by StrangerInAStrainedLand at 11:18 PM on November 7, 2007

i have been on exactly ONE blind date. did it go well? two words: vegetarian taxedermist.
posted by sexyrobot at 12:00 AM on November 8, 2007 [4 favorites]

When I was still single and dating, I never turned down a blind date. Never, never, never ever. Lowered expectations make for good times! And, sometimes, they actually worked out pretty well.

I would have LOVED a site like this back then....

posted by smcdow at 4:17 AM on November 8, 2007 [1 favorite]

kkokkodalk, email or memail me. We'll talk, maybe set up a double blind date (for reals).
posted by piratebowling at 7:41 AM on November 8, 2007

“This will end well; or with crabs.”

Either way, what bliss.
posted by Smedleyman at 9:33 PM on November 8, 2007

With everyone here signing up, we might as well start a Metafilter dating feature. I'd be up for it.
posted by greta simone at 1:07 PM on November 10, 2007

« Older Dear Metafilter,--Wait, you'll definitely respond.   |   Burn baby burn Newer »

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