You know you hate them, or love them
December 6, 2007 11:23 AM   Subscribe

The New England Patriots. Not The Patriot, or a Patriot, Rather the Patriots! Some folks *HATE* them. There's even a game. (About the game.)

What about that hunka hunka Tom Brady? You know who he's dating now, don'tcha? Don't forget his baybay with Bridget Moynahan.

Are The Patriots going to repeat the unrepeatable and have an undeafeated season like the 1972 Dolphins? Some folks are rooting against it. Advertisers hope so.

Meet the players with compelling stories - The Stroke, the retiree, Tom "Super Bowl MVP" Brady and so many more.
posted by valentinepig (56 comments total)
 
That game is soooooo unrealistic.

I mean, Big Ben is wearing his helmet!


Seriously, I couldn't believe that I was rooting for the Ravens last weekend. The Pats have had two bad weeks in a row - here's hoping the Stillers can put them in their place.
posted by god hates math at 11:30 AM on December 6, 2007


Hey it's tough being a Boston fan this year.
posted by jeblis at 11:34 AM on December 6, 2007 [1 favorite]


Sure, Brady can win multiple Super Bowls, but when it comes to hosting SNL he is pwned by Peyton Manning.
posted by brain_drain at 11:35 AM on December 6, 2007


And that is very important.
posted by brain_drain at 11:35 AM on December 6, 2007


You didn't ask, but here's what I think...

Jacksonville will knock New England out of the Playoffs.

They'll use the same blueprint that the Ravens almost won with, but they'll do it better.
posted by BobFrapples at 11:36 AM on December 6, 2007


I pray every day that the Patriots will lose.
posted by Pants! at 11:38 AM on December 6, 2007


God I hate the Patriots. Because I hate perfection.
posted by puke & cry at 11:38 AM on December 6, 2007


What about The League's Dirties Player? Or The HGH User? Yes, those links are supposed to be the same.
posted by inigo2 at 11:43 AM on December 6, 2007


Why do so many people hate the Patriots? The reasons I've heard, and the reasons I think they're silly are as follows:

* They're good - Yeah, but they were good before this season (this is the 5th straight year they've made the postseason, and they've won three Superbowls in the past decade). And people still like the Yankees and they've been dominant for basically all of the past millennium.
* They cheated - Lance. Floyd. Barry. American sports fans love cheaters, especially when they succeed despite it.
* Massholes are sore winners - No, no, that one I can believe. Living in Boston would be great if it wasn't for all the Bostonians.
posted by Plutor at 11:45 AM on December 6, 2007


s/despite/because of/
posted by Plutor at 11:46 AM on December 6, 2007


So this Tom Brady, he's cute?
posted by rooftop secrets at 11:48 AM on December 6, 2007


Seriously though, is there anything in this post that merits posting, or is this an excuse to talk about the New England Patriots?
posted by rooftop secrets at 11:49 AM on December 6, 2007


I like them simply because they are so amazingly good and that so many players contribute to their high level of play. That and the fact that they do all the basics (blocking, tackling, etc) so damn well.

A couple sub-par games does not deter from the fact that they are the best team many of us have seen in 20 years and maybe in our lifetimes. No way anyone in the AFC ends up in the SB other than the Patriots.
posted by DieHipsterDie at 11:50 AM on December 6, 2007


We'll let other cities win some sports games once they start giving gay people equal rights. Hell, I'm not even a Patriots fan, but I enjoy it whenever a Massachusetts team beats any other US team. Especially when they have a racist team name/logo. Yeah, I'm blaming you, sports fans.
posted by allen.spaulding at 11:52 AM on December 6, 2007 [3 favorites]


They cheated?
Prove it. Prove that in any way what they did gave them an advantage. Taping games/sounds from the sidelines does not a championship team make. When were they supposed to do all this analysis? during half-time? Puleeze Drop the cheating tag.
posted by Gungho at 11:53 AM on December 6, 2007


No way anyone in the AFC ends up in the SB other than the Patriots.

Umm, you *have* been watching their games lately, right? I agree they're by far the best team in the league but it's a league of parity, and Indianapolis definitely has a good shot at them in the playoffs.
posted by rooftop secrets at 11:55 AM on December 6, 2007


rooftop secrets poses a good question here.

And the Patriots are not going to lose in the post-season. Not to Jacksonville, not to anyone. Because they are very good at football.

Also, compared to Ray Lewis, Rodney Harrison is Gandhi and Albert Schweitzer rolled into one.
posted by ibmcginty at 11:56 AM on December 6, 2007


They are an awesome team, as DieHipsterDie points out. And I think that fact is creating some psychological effects - as I watched the fourth quarter of the Baltimore game, there was just a sense of what was going to happen - that it was inevitable that the Pats would somehow pull the game out. The announcers even commented on it.

I wonder if the Ravens started feeling that way too.
posted by never used baby shoes at 11:56 AM on December 6, 2007


Gungho, were you quoting me? The line between (allegedly unknowingly) violating the rules to gain an advantage and cheating is pretty thin. Maybe I shouldn't have used the word "cheat" but since the invective is pretty powerful when it comes to the Patriots, I thought I'd drop the C-bomb before someone accused me of weaseling.
posted by Plutor at 11:57 AM on December 6, 2007


They cheated?
Prove it. Prove that in any way what they did gave them an advantage.


Huh? They lost a first round draft pick and hundreds of thousands of dollars on account of their cheating. They had been warned there would be severe consequences for the specific behavior they engaged in. And they went ahead and did it anyway. If there's no possible advantage in it, they're the biggest fucking idiots in sports.
posted by Nahum Tate at 11:58 AM on December 6, 2007 [2 favorites]


As long as this has nothing to do with rugby, I don't understand why we're talking about it.
posted by phaedon at 12:00 PM on December 6, 2007


I'd like to think this year's Super Bowl will be a repeat of '97 with the same result.
posted by drezdn at 12:03 PM on December 6, 2007


I hope the Patriots win the super bowl and STILL get (one of) the first draft picks because of their trade with San Francisco. Right now they have the, what, 2nd pick?

That would be so sweet.
posted by Justinian at 12:04 PM on December 6, 2007


I think the flash game saved this post. Huzzah!

i Also love the link to little Brandon sitting all alone in his room, on his laptop trying to come up with some clever snark to shit in this thread with...and poof! up pops giant floating Patriots helmet!

"Don't do it Brandon" GiantHelmet says. "Think of Tom Brady. He needs little boys like you to believe in him. If you just BELIEVE hard enough, Tom Brady gets everything he wants. More money. Another Super Bowl Ring. Sex with supermodels. More handsomer. Power to control the minds of Traffic cops. CLOSE YOUR EYES AND BELIEVE WITH ME BRANDON!

Listen to the giant floating helmet everyone...Tom Brady's perfect life depends on it!

Later that night, around 2am, the giant floating Seahawks helmet shows up...

"nothing wrong with being mediocre, dude. just get by man,just get by. Stupid Patriots helmet, thinks he's SOOOO cool...mind if i sleep here? I lost the stadium keys again"
posted by billyfleetwood at 12:07 PM on December 6, 2007 [2 favorites]


i will love the patriots until they lose... which will lose me my bet.

after the baltimore game, though, i'm pretty sure my money is safe.
posted by dopamine at 12:14 PM on December 6, 2007


Right on, Justinian. The Pats took their #28 overall pick last year, and traded it for San Fran's #1 this year-- already a good trade.

They also got SF's #110 overall pick in that trade. Which they turned into Randy Moss.

I think it was a good trade for the Patriots.
posted by ibmcginty at 12:24 PM on December 6, 2007


Seriously though, is there anything in this post that merits posting, or is this an excuse to talk about the New England Patriots?

Clearly you haven't played the flash game yet. I'd get on that, if were you.
posted by god hates math at 12:36 PM on December 6, 2007


"merits posting?"

On so many levels...yes. But the only reason I did the post was to share the game. I think it's cool.
posted by valentinepig at 12:38 PM on December 6, 2007


Shout out to math!
posted by valentinepig at 12:39 PM on December 6, 2007


Call me when you're on my block.
posted by phaedon at 12:40 PM on December 6, 2007


I want to make one observation regarding the cheating thing. I've heard multiple sports radio people say the following (in effect): "Do you really think the Patriots need to cheat to beat the NY Jets??? They could beat the NY Jets with one hand tied behind their back."

What I don't hear anyone bringing up is this: It really doesn't matter what you or I think: What is relevant is what the Patriots think/thought. The Patriots were videotaping (even after a league warning against such practices) for a reason, and that reason was to achieve some competitive advantage. In other words, it doesn't matter what you or I think. The Patriots felt that they had a better chance of beating the Jets with the taping than they did without it. So don't ridicule anyone who agrees with them OR says that they didn't need it. They thought they needed it, or that it gave them some edge. How the game/season turned out is irrelevant.
posted by spock at 12:44 PM on December 6, 2007


Sex with a super model isn't that much better than sex with a regular model. Trust me.
posted by Floydd at 12:46 PM on December 6, 2007


Being a Cleveland fan I can say... nothing good comes from Boston... sore losers and even worse winners. They can all go eat rotten clam chowder..... In fact GO YANKEES!~ (I just threw up in my mouth a little) I need a glass of water.
posted by Mastercheddaar at 12:47 PM on December 6, 2007


Maybe we could have waited until they'd actually won something. Until then this looks just like the hyperbole-storm engulfing every instantiation of sports media in the country.

Prove it. Prove that in any way what they did gave them an advantage.

Are you Bill Simmons?

Alright, I'll give you the game link. It's cool.
posted by prosthezis at 12:48 PM on December 6, 2007


I love the Fatheads site. Especially since they now just have life-size player cut-outs, and they call them fatheads too.

Other Fatheads of interest: Tom Brady, Teddy Bruschi
posted by smackfu at 1:00 PM on December 6, 2007


Seriously, that Flash game is great.
posted by kbanas at 1:12 PM on December 6, 2007


Uuuuugh, Patriots fans. Worse than "9/11 Truth" people. Worse than Ron Paul spambots. If I could de-index anything on these here innernets, it would be "Patriots."

P.S. Go Horse!
posted by NolanRyanHatesMatches at 1:40 PM on December 6, 2007


I did not expect to see a Pats thread here at Metafilter. However since it's here, I'll note that just the other day I purchased this shirt. And it is fabulous.
posted by psmith at 2:09 PM on December 6, 2007


Tedy Bruschi, just as in real life, can not be killed by conventional weapons.

Awesome. The "dreambaby army" and the Borg Belichick were great, too.

You can check my profile for the design of the Cobra Kai Yankees t-shirt I had made recently. Go Pats!
posted by Rock Steady at 2:17 PM on December 6, 2007 [1 favorite]


I have to agree with DieHipsterDie on the fundimentals.
Can’t say I’m all that passionate about the Patriots either way tho. I don’t like cheating in any form and I think those involved should have gotten swifter and harder groinkicks. But I am positively passionate about that style of play.
I think, given the new nature of the game (caps, et.al.), dynasties and small core or single elite player domination is going to play less and less of a role and it’s going to be more and more team effort.
And that’s a real pleasure to watch (which is kinda like rugby really).
posted by Smedleyman at 2:45 PM on December 6, 2007


Proud Member of Patriot Nation signing in. It's been a very few good years to be a Pats fan, and goddamnit I'm enjoying every second of it.
posted by QuarterlyProphet at 3:00 PM on December 6, 2007


Rodney Harrison - On October 21, 2007 was the first ever to enter the 30/30 Club (30 interceptions and 30 sacks)

I love the Patriots casue I have followed them since they had Jim Plunkett and were 2-14. Now they are great. Cheaters - yes, but still great. I wish they didn't cheat, but I would bet most teams cheat during any given year - or any given game even.

They seem to have a self discipline and maturity that some Pro Football folks don't have (Brian Billick sticking out his tongue? - although it was a patriot that egged him on)
posted by donaldekelly at 3:10 PM on December 6, 2007


drezdn has it right
posted by MNDZ at 3:12 PM on December 6, 2007


I was for the patriots in the first two super bowls they were in. Then there was the superbowl against the Eagles. That year Donovan had taken a lot of flak from Rush Limbaugh saying that he was only starting because they needed minorities at quarterback (or something of the sort) and it was continually brought up whether he was actually good enough in the weeks leading up to the superbowl. Shortly after the Eagles lost, lo, there's Brady at the State of the Union address with the camera panning to him as Bush mentions the 'steroid crisis' in baseball. I couldn't help but see this as a political statement by him...because a good right wing candidate free of substances is a winner! Looking further into it, Bellicheck runs the team with a right wing hyper-militaristic players are expendable attitude. And sadly it's working.

That's why I personally dislike them.
posted by kigpig at 6:06 PM on December 6, 2007


I used to hate the Patriots because they needed a last second FG and 100-150 less penalty yds than the other team to win a game, yet everyone thought they were awesome.

Now I just hate them and anyone who cheers for them.
posted by T.D. Strange at 7:20 PM on December 6, 2007


kigpig: Looking further into it, Bellicheck runs the team with a right wing hyper-militaristic players are expendable attitude.
Whoa wait...
I am a Boston fan, but I've always loved the Patriots more than other recent Boston team since their ethos is not "right wing hyper-militaristic" (any moreso than any other sports team), but, if anything, left wing communist. Think about it, until this year, Brady has been a highly effective leader without being a super-star statistically. He led with the "intangibles," mounting innumerable fourth-quarter comebacks and winning with clever play-calling, trick plays, and audibles at the line of scrimmage (check out the NFL films take on the Pats-Rams super bowl for the perfect team game).
The only records he really set were for throwing to the greatest number of different receivers, none of whom were superstars. Heck, Troy Brown returned punts and frequently appeared on kickoff return. Wes Welker is now coming into that multi-role position, as is, unbelievably, Randy Moss (who's played some secondary). The defense, too, has been a team effort, compared to other teams with single super-stars (Ray Lewis, Michael Strahan, etc.).
With a salary cap, they are unlike the Red Sox who can "buy" a championship. The Patriots have always been greater than the sum of their parts, a team that wins with teamwork in an age where sports are constantly defined by individual performances. Now that Brady is coming into his own as a super-star, Bellicheck made a stupid decision to photograph defensive signals, and everything is clicking for the team, people are turning against them. Oh well, I'm enjoying watching one of the greatest teams ever.
posted by themadjuggler at 7:41 PM on December 6, 2007


Some things I forgot:
  • Many Patriots taking pay cuts after their second super bowl win to keep the team together
  • The Patriots' high rate of retaining their draft picks (instead of going out and finding veteran ringers)
  • Drew Bledsoe coming back during the playoffs to fill in for an injured Brady after sitting out most of the year after his own injury without complaining whatsoever, throwing a TD, then relinquishing the starting role again to the hot young arm.
  • The Patriots' defensive success coming mainly from giving opponents different views each week and being smart players
posted by themadjuggler at 7:56 PM on December 6, 2007


I was for the patriots in the first two super bowls they were in.

For a while, Boston sports fans had the rest of the nation behind them. Whether it was the 2001 Patriots (underdogs, team concept, post-nanalala red-white-and-blue-ism) or the 03/04 Red Sox (anti-Yankee, Reverse the Curse, Cowboy Up) we were "America's Team" (sorry Cowboys). Now things have turned around completely -- to the point that people were actually rooting FOR the Yankees and Ray Lewis to avoid rooting for our teams. We are now the dynastic, cheating, big market, over-confident assholes, and you know what? It's kind of fun. It's nice to be the bad guy. It feels good to see the Pats scoring Eff-You Touchdowns and watch the Sox close in on Johan Santana, when it's quite possible they only got into the chase to drive the Yankee's price up.
posted by Rock Steady at 8:29 PM on December 6, 2007


I'm with Rock Steady. Also, I can't wait until we play the Jets, score 84 points, and Gregg Easterbrook explodes.

In the meantime, however, the run defense better get its shit together before Sunday.
posted by psmith at 8:43 PM on December 6, 2007


I am a Boston fan, but I've always loved the Patriots more than other recent Boston team since their ethos is not "right wing hyper-militaristic" (any moreso than any other sports team), but, if anything, left wing communist. Think about it, until this year, Brady has been a highly effective leader without being a super-star statistically. He led with the "intangibles," mounting innumerable fourth-quarter comebacks and winning with clever play-calling, trick plays, and audibles at the line of scrimmage (check out the NFL films take on the Pats-Rams super bowl for the perfect team game).

Belichick cans anyone who doesn't perform instantly in a very spartan way. Brady clearly has and seems to have no other value structure than football is life and has performed well with this. So he's not going anywhere. Should Brady get injured and not be the superstar he is now when he comes back? Watch how fast he gets canned. But that doesn't really address your remark. Wasn't it the rams, that year, who were the most exploratory team with Mike Martz? The team that would go for it on 4th and a few yards when it made no sense to, and pull stunt plays like fake punts? As far as innumerable fourth-quarter comebacks, just look at the past week's Ravens game to see why people are suspicious of these, seeing as a penalty on the Patriots kept the game in their hands, something that's happened numerous times since the Belicheck era. And I'll give Brady the audibles at the line of scrimage, but what does that have to do with right/left wing? Clearly the Patriots are the hardened win or be a failure team of the NFL which is a very right wing attitude.
posted by kigpig at 12:03 AM on December 7, 2007


Belichick cans anyone who doesn't perform instantly in a very spartan way

I was at the Pats / Eagles game and before the game they showed clips from 300 where the Pats were supposed to be the Spartans vs the giant Pursian army.... I don't know who came up with that idea but I knew it was a bad omen from the start.

Also this thread reminds me of my first website on geocities... some where out there on the web is a site that says "Pack is gonna" lose with Brett Farve being crossed out in the red no smoking symbol and a Homer Simpson animated gif. Dam you Desmond Howard.
posted by matimer at 1:29 AM on December 7, 2007 [1 favorite]


Damn, matimer, now you got me feeling nostalgic for *my* first geocities site, which was little more than a collection of lists of my favourite movies, albums, etc., and a bunch of enormous album cover gifs.

So far this year I've gone from rooting for the Pats, to against them, to really against them, and back to (sort of) rooting for them, but not really. If they beat the Steelers, though, I'll be rooting for them to go undefeated. And the Jets game should be fascinating, in a car-wreck sort of way.
posted by The Card Cheat at 6:04 AM on December 7, 2007


Much as I'm entertained by the enmity the Pats currently seem to enjoy, I'm not buying the "running up the score" piece of it. I wouldn't be surprised if we really did run up the score against the Jets though.

I'm hoping to see Belichick on the sidelines emoting the same "FUCK YOU" one sees vividly in Josh Beckett's smirk as he stares into the box during a playoff game.
posted by psmith at 3:47 PM on December 7, 2007


From US magazine:

Most fathers shed tears of joy when their first child is born, but when actress Bridget Moynahan gave birth to a baby boy on August 23, father Tom Brady found himself crying tears of sadness instead.

As the NFL star and his parents headed for the exit of the maternity ward of St. John’s Health Center in Santa Monica, California, around 9:45 p.m., his eyes welled up.

“I felt so bad for him because he was upset,” an eyewitness tells Us.

To put it mildly, this was likely not the way the New England Patriots quarterback, 30, envisioned his first days as a new dad.

Why the tears?

"Bridget wants nothing to do with Tom," says one Moynahan source.

According to pals close to Moynahan, 36, Brady neglected his ex (whom he dumped in December after nearly three years of dating) for much of her pregnancy, instead choosing to romance his current squeeze, supermodel Gisele Bundchen, 27.

Inside the actress' private suite, “the mood was very somber," says a source. “Their parents gave them time alone to try and work things out, but Bridget is very bitter.”
posted by dragonsi55 at 5:02 PM on December 7, 2007


TOM BRADY IS EVIL. US MAGAZINE TOLD ME SO. PEOPLE MAGAZINE DID TOO. INTELLIGENT PEOPLE TRUST THESE SOURCES AND IF YOU DON'T AGREE YOU ARE A DOUCHE.

I have no idea if Tom Brady is a good guy with a good heart. But come on.
posted by psmith at 6:14 PM on December 7, 2007


The offense sucked but we won. Rock.
posted by psmith at 2:49 PM on December 16, 2007


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