Eat me.
January 15, 2008 12:21 PM   Subscribe

Why go with a simple cake topper? A Texan bride of Nigerian descent had a klassy cake made for her big day. The company who created the brilliant piece. One of the master sculptors talks about AND shows us how she did it. Other cakes they've made. Well worth the 5 grand. Does this contradict empath’s statement that 5’4” people aren’t diseased?
posted by gman (48 comments total) 4 users marked this as a favorite
 
What on earth does the last sentence have to do with anything?
posted by desjardins at 12:26 PM on January 15, 2008


I get it, but yeah, the last sentence is unneccessary.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 12:31 PM on January 15, 2008


Shouldn't that be "classy cake" (or "cace") or "klassy kake"?
posted by DU at 12:31 PM on January 15, 2008


that's waaaaaay too much effort just to say, "EAT ME".
posted by liza at 12:32 PM on January 15, 2008


The third picture on the CNN's webpage clearly shows the groom thinking "what the hell have I done?" Look at his eyes. HIS EEEEEYES.
posted by spec80 at 12:40 PM on January 15, 2008


I like how this turns the little "groom and bride" figurines on top of the cake completely inside out. Not to mention how the cake is all bride, no groom.

Especially delicious combined with the picture in the second link, with the proud bride next to her cake and the groom in the background, almost an afterthought.
posted by splice at 12:41 PM on January 15, 2008


This is the kind of thing you look back on years later and wonder why you didn't listen to your buddies about her.
posted by hermitosis at 12:41 PM on January 15, 2008 [7 favorites]


Also, they really missed an opportunity for the bride to burst out of a cake shaped like herself.
posted by hermitosis at 12:43 PM on January 15, 2008 [6 favorites]


I hope he had a pre-nup.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 12:46 PM on January 15, 2008


You think it's funny now, but when the groom starts cheating on his wife with the cake topper, a once happy marriage will be ruined...

RU'NED!!
posted by aftermarketradio at 12:46 PM on January 15, 2008


I feel like there's a relevant quote from Marie Antoinette for this situation, but for the life of me I can't figure out what it is.
posted by Faint of Butt at 12:47 PM on January 15, 2008 [2 favorites]


I feel like there's a relevant quote from Marie Antoinette for this situation, but for the life of me I can't figure out what it is.

"OH GOD PLEASE DON'T CUT MY HEAD OFF PLEASEOHPLEASEOHPLEASEOHPL---"
posted by dersins at 12:50 PM on January 15, 2008 [6 favorites]


I think the groom's going to be one of those husbands who, when asked how he's doing, turns to his wife for answers.
posted by clevershark at 12:54 PM on January 15, 2008


If it was accurate down to marzipan internal organs, now we're talking.
posted by maxwelton at 12:55 PM on January 15, 2008 [3 favorites]


Hm, well it is a good cake...well made anyway. And I bet it weighs more than the bride does. I'm assuming they moved it in sections and finished it on-site. Also, that last picture on CNN makes it look like they took the cake on a carriage ride but I assume that's not the case.
posted by puke & cry at 12:56 PM on January 15, 2008


With the last sentence here and your frequent use of Pastabagel as a tag to your posts, you are clearly trying too hard to... well, whatever the hell it is you are trying to do, you are trying toohard to do it.
posted by dios at 12:58 PM on January 15, 2008


With the last sentence here and your frequent use of Pastabagel as a tag to your posts, you are clearly trying too hard to... well, whatever the hell it is you are trying to do, you are trying toohard to do it.

eat me.
posted by gman at 1:01 PM on January 15, 2008


your frequent use of Pastabagel as a tag to your posts

Yeah. That's just...fucking weird. What's up with that?
posted by dersins at 1:05 PM on January 15, 2008


that's what she said.
posted by patricio at 1:05 PM on January 15, 2008 [2 favorites]


So, does the groom get to stab his cake-wife at the reception or what?
posted by clevershark at 1:07 PM on January 15, 2008


"Klassy"?

And a "pastabagel" tag?

DO NOT WANT.
posted by scrump at 1:10 PM on January 15, 2008


Sadly, the bride was partially devoured before anyone noticed the mistake.
posted by Astro Zombie at 1:14 PM on January 15, 2008 [2 favorites]


Who got stuck having to eat her girly parts?
posted by HotPatatta at 1:20 PM on January 15, 2008


I just can't get rid of the mental image of the bride's cake's head sitting in the freezer awaiting the first anniversary.
posted by pernoctalian at 1:27 PM on January 15, 2008 [1 favorite]


I hope someone eats her face.
posted by studentbaker at 1:31 PM on January 15, 2008


gman is definitely a 'tagging outlier', making his post tags non-useful but adding extra entertainment value. Maybe tags should be a 'no-joke' zone like AskMe is, but that's an issue for MetaTalk (and I'm not gonna be the one to post it, sorry.)

Back on topic, when the inevitable cake-cutting dissection took place, were there rules as to what 'parts' of the bride-cake were allowed to be eaten by what members of the wedding party? Because that's where it could get very creepy. But if not, can I request a breast?

(Also, what pernoctalian said. This poor dude could get traumatized just for going for a midnight snack! Comedy Platinum.)
posted by wendell at 1:31 PM on January 15, 2008


Personally, I find this is as scary as Tom Cruise on Scientology.
posted by troubadour at 1:47 PM on January 15, 2008


There was actually duct tape in the cake?
posted by mds35 at 1:52 PM on January 15, 2008


Be your cake and eat it, too.
posted by CynicalKnight at 1:52 PM on January 15, 2008 [1 favorite]


I believe this is the first time I've seen a comment linked in a post. And it's pretty fucking stupid.

Hey, gman? Smoke your purps after you post.
posted by loquacious at 1:54 PM on January 15, 2008


Aw man, the head isn't edible.

I wonder if the bride will be displaying that part under a glass dome in their living room.
posted by jamaro at 2:01 PM on January 15, 2008


It's not that pastabagel tag that offends me.
posted by seanyboy at 2:16 PM on January 15, 2008


Thank god there are still people who are willing to spend ridiculous amounts on wedding cakes, as it keeps my wife employed. When she saw this online, she said "bet they charged her the bridezilla tax" as well.
posted by Razzle Bathbone at 2:17 PM on January 15, 2008


Actually, that last comment by me makes no sense.

I should have said that there are more offensive tags than "pastabagel".
I mean "nigeria"? Really? That's relevant to this story how?
posted by seanyboy at 2:19 PM on January 15, 2008


'Bridezilla tax'

I just cried.
posted by Frasermoo at 2:34 PM on January 15, 2008


gman, could you possibly also consider using something approaching grammar in your posts? Why are your sentences so fragmentary? Makes for a crap post.

Still, freaky cake.
posted by wilful at 2:49 PM on January 15, 2008


Boy, this all seemed real clever while you were drunk, didn't it?
posted by klangklangston at 3:08 PM on January 15, 2008


I hope the cake was red velvet.
posted by makonan at 3:12 PM on January 15, 2008


The Average White Band was unavailable for comment.
posted by gimonca at 3:39 PM on January 15, 2008


What on earth does the last sentence have to do with anything?

i read the article in the last link and remembered a previous comment, which triggered a connection in my mind.

your frequent use of Pastabagel as a tag to your posts

Yeah. That's just...fucking weird. What's up with that?


i like the nickname. it makes me laugh.

I believe this is the first time I've seen a comment linked in a post. And it's pretty fucking stupid.

i had nothing else to be original about at the time.

Hey, gman? Smoke your purps after you post.

i can't always post at 6 am.... and even then......

I mean "nigeria"? Really? That's relevant to this story how?

did you read the heartwarming story or simply jump in to join the mob?

gman, could you possibly also consider using something approaching grammar in your posts? Why are your sentences so fragmentary? Makes for a crap post.


i could, but i get too excited.
posted by gman at 4:56 PM on January 15, 2008


This is one of those posts that made perfect sense not to click any of the links. The resulting comments were entertaining enough, and I thought, this is much more funny and surreal not really knowing what anyone is talking about. But then I clicked a link, and I was wrong ...
posted by krinklyfig at 8:28 PM on January 15, 2008


3 words:

hot
ghetto
mess
posted by dasheekeejones at 3:47 AM on January 16, 2008


"If you can dream it, we can achieve it."

I dream for a cake that depicts their honeymoon---gag ball and all.
posted by dasheekeejones at 3:50 AM on January 16, 2008


your frequent use of Pastabagel as a tag to your posts

Yeah. That's just...fucking weird. What's up with that?

i like the nickname. it makes me laugh.


That's cool and all, but the point of tags is for them to be useful.
posted by dirtynumbangelboy at 5:53 AM on January 16, 2008


That's cool and all, but the point of tags is for them to be useful.

a: i stopped using that tag prior to this post
b: it was useful.... to me
posted by gman at 10:43 AM on January 16, 2008


i stopped using that tag prior to this post

And replaced it with "its all about me me me."

Stay "klassy," gman.
posted by dersins at 10:46 AM on January 16, 2008


And replaced it with "its all about me me me."

Stay "klassy," gman.


no, i didn't.
posted by gman at 10:50 AM on January 16, 2008


got it.
posted by gman at 10:51 AM on January 16, 2008


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