Don't Panic
March 6, 2008 7:30 PM   Subscribe

 
the man who mistook his life for his hat
posted by horsemuth at 7:37 PM on March 6, 2008 [18 favorites]


What an airhead.
posted by brain_drain at 7:42 PM on March 6, 2008 [4 favorites]


Hats off to him. No, wait.
posted by not_on_display at 7:46 PM on March 6, 2008 [5 favorites]


He must have been able to get air through the gravel or something.
posted by delmoi at 7:47 PM on March 6, 2008


Gotta say, delmoi, I love you, but you ruined a great run of comments, there, buddy.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 8:00 PM on March 6, 2008 [2 favorites]


This is why Indiana Jones always wears a hat.
posted by Artw at 8:11 PM on March 6, 2008 [1 favorite]


[pun about hats]
posted by !Jim at 8:18 PM on March 6, 2008 [5 favorites]


Great, more propaganda from the American Hat Council. FedoraBlue!
posted by bluejayk at 8:21 PM on March 6, 2008 [2 favorites]


Flapjax.. does three hat puns constitute a great run?

Wait... three in a row is a Hat Trick, no?

posted by not_on_display at 8:21 PM on March 6, 2008 [3 favorites]


The cat in the hat came back.
posted by unSane at 8:22 PM on March 6, 2008 [2 favorites]


The power of positive thinking ionic ironic.
posted by Mblue at 8:23 PM on March 6, 2008


i envy this man. the last time this happenedc to me i was forced to breathe my own farts.
posted by kitchenrat at 8:25 PM on March 6, 2008 [3 favorites]


Holy crap. Suffocating, drowning, being buried alive: the stuff of nightmares.
posted by loiseau at 8:32 PM on March 6, 2008




That was when the Buddhist turned to meditation to control his intake of oxygen. “I knew it would not last, so I made myself relax and concentrated on slowing down my breathing by meditation.”

What special powers do believing in Jesus confer?
posted by porpoise at 8:34 PM on March 6, 2008


Alway keep a little air in your hat.
posted by nola at 8:41 PM on March 6, 2008


I guess if he'd gotten hungry he could've eaten his hat. Course, then his air supply would've run out...
posted by flapjax at midnite at 8:46 PM on March 6, 2008


Okay then, just in case, the hat's going with me in the coffin, not on top of it.
posted by tellurian at 8:49 PM on March 6, 2008


And to think you assholes all attacked the kid with the Fedora. Were you trying to get him killed?
posted by agentofselection at 8:56 PM on March 6, 2008 [2 favorites]


I have never read a headline that gave me more absolute joy than this.
Thank you, Metafilter; thank you.
posted by Pecinpah at 9:10 PM on March 6, 2008


What special powers do believing in Jesus confer?

Ruling the fucking world for like a thousand years?
posted by Dr. Curare at 9:20 PM on March 6, 2008


He must have been able to get air through the gravel or something.

The problem is that the matrix of the sediment shown in that picture is incredibly fine-grained (if I know my Chinese geology, likely loess, a silt-sized particle). With a poorly sorted sediment like that, even with a recent fall the sorting of various-sized particles would close up pore space pretty fast. I'd say he's pretty lucky he had his helmet.
posted by six-or-six-thirty at 9:20 PM on March 6, 2008


Hmm. Less certain about the loess bit now that I see Ningbo is so far north in China. But the rest, I stand by. Hastiness shall be the end of me.
posted by six-or-six-thirty at 9:27 PM on March 6, 2008


This is why Indiana Jones always wears a hat.

Is Indiana Jones a Buddhist?
posted by homunculus at 9:28 PM on March 6, 2008


I don't care how calm you are, you still need oxygen. I don't buy it.
posted by zach4000 at 9:43 PM on March 6, 2008


I read a lot of headlines, and rarely do I have the "Holy Shit, I have to read this one right the fuck now!" reflex.

Then I get to the "Made in China" part and the meh sets in, and then here I am back in my stinking life again.
posted by Clave at 10:52 PM on March 6, 2008


I suspect that while he may have been stuck in the mud for a couple of hours, his head was probably unearthed within a few minutes.
posted by The Monkey at 10:55 PM on March 6, 2008


Just think, if it weren't for China's atrocious worker's rights record, we wouldn't have this great story to talk about!
posted by dirigibleman at 11:40 PM on March 6, 2008


I will now wear a stovepipe hat every day....just in case.
posted by The Light Fantastic at 12:17 AM on March 7, 2008


I'm going to fill up my iPod with soft-rock ballads. By Air Supply.

Just in case.
posted by tracicle at 12:25 AM on March 7, 2008 [1 favorite]


I'm going to fill up my iPod with soft-rock ballads. By Air Supply

Or you could go instead with the exquisite free jazz interplay of Henry Threadgill's old band, Air. They were great.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 12:50 AM on March 7, 2008


I keep my extra supply of oxygen in my boots, with my money roll and a bowie knife. There's enough air in there to live on for a week, although it smells rather bad, admittedly, admittedly.
posted by Astro Zombie at 1:01 AM on March 7, 2008


This is not possible without homeopathy treatments!
posted by srboisvert at 1:53 AM on March 7, 2008


To air in Hunan; to live, divine.
posted by hal9k at 2:10 AM on March 7, 2008 [6 favorites]


Call Adam Savage, stat!
posted by bwg at 2:17 AM on March 7, 2008


If I ever I visit a Chinese building site... this is what I will be wearing.
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 3:37 AM on March 7, 2008


I haven't slept for nearly 20 hours, and it seems I'm now in the phase where I read funny, mentally randomly copy-pasting bits from one word to another:

Man buried alive saved by salad trapped in his hat.

Well, thank goodness he had salad trapped in his hat, and thus didn't starve while buried.

Wait a minute, how on earth does one get salad trapped in one's hat, in sufficient amounts. That must be quite uncommon.

Lucky guy.
posted by Anything at 3:45 AM on March 7, 2008


From the article:

There was nothing to distinguish Mr Wang from the tens of thousands of men across China labouring in one of the biggest building booms that the world has seen.

That's because THEY ALL LOOK SAME, AMIRITE?
posted by kcds at 6:09 AM on March 7, 2008 [2 favorites]


Or you could go instead with the exquisite free jazz interplay of Henry Threadgill's old band, Air. They were great.

Seconded. (And needless to say, I too love the headline.)
posted by languagehat at 6:52 AM on March 7, 2008


There was nothing to distinguish Mr Wang from the tens of thousands of men across China labouring in one of the biggest building booms that the world has seen.

He was the one they dug out, the other 9,999 didn't make it?
posted by prostyle at 7:26 AM on March 7, 2008


I feel sorry for the Buddhists that they don't get excited. All that serenity sounds BORR-RRRING. I would trade IN A SECOND the possibility of dying a ditch collapse for my blessed ability to go crazy high-fiving nuts over a walkoff homer, or finding an egg with two yolks.
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 7:55 AM on March 7, 2008


All ya suckers is playa hatters.
posted by Peter H at 9:02 AM on March 7, 2008


He cheated death by using a stand-in.
posted by doctorschlock at 9:37 AM on March 7, 2008


What special powers do believing in Jesus confer?

Jesus is really more for water related catastrophes, flooding, sinking boats, etc. His walk-on-water talents are really effective here. He's also good for emergency catering and some basic healing, but for serenity and calmness in the face of cave-ins you gotta go with Buddha.

Now, if you are moving, Vishnu is the god you are looking for; those extra arms make big jobs a snap.
posted by quin at 9:52 AM on March 7, 2008 [4 favorites]


To stupidsexyFlanders: it depends on the sect, but Buddhists get plenty excited. Maybe not while meditation, but during day-to-day life.

In Buddhist terms the important things are equanimity and awareness. In other words, the trick is not to get too attached to it, and to be aware of the exact sensations going on at the time. It's a big plus if you can summon up some loving-kindness too.
posted by webnrrd2k at 9:55 AM on March 7, 2008


This would never have worked in the land of Rand McNally...
posted by samsara at 10:05 AM on March 7, 2008


I feel sorry for the Buddhists that they don't get excited.

Some do: Thai monks told to behave on networking Web sites
posted by homunculus at 11:48 AM on March 7, 2008 [2 favorites]


i envy this man. the last time this happenedc to me i was forced to breathe my own farts.

Let me guess, you're from San Francisco right?
posted by mannequito at 2:56 PM on March 7, 2008


Talk about luck, the guy should go to casino or play the lotto. What are the chances!
posted by aurise at 10:51 AM on March 8, 2008


Wow, I've been known to get freaky when trapped in an elevator. I can't even imagine being that calm. Yay him!
posted by dejah420 at 6:53 PM on March 8, 2008


Not from Frisco, he was forced.
posted by Dr. Curare at 3:44 AM on March 9, 2008




« Older Fantastic Plastic Machine   |   Move, Shoot, and Communicate Newer »


This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments