The Emergency Party Button
May 11, 2008 12:29 PM   Subscribe

Should be retitled: Emergency standard house music button.
posted by Burhanistan at 12:36 PM on May 11, 2008 [1 favorite]

*resists sideways bobbing of head*
posted by phaedon at 12:40 PM on May 11, 2008

Excellent idea. Wretched website design.
posted by martinX's bellbottoms at 12:41 PM on May 11, 2008 [1 favorite]

*resists sideways bobbing of head*

Is "What is love?" a sideways head bobber or a forward bobber? Feels like the latter to me, but I could be in need of recalibration.
posted by Burhanistan at 12:43 PM on May 11, 2008 [1 favorite]

It is my firm belief that activation of The Party Button should require the turning of two keys simultaneously on opposite sides of the room. The power to invoke a truly kickass party should not rest with one person alone, and should by no means be taken lightly.

With great parties comes great responsibility.

(See also the "MIDAS" Party Mode Dorm)
posted by Rhaomi at 12:44 PM on May 11, 2008 [7 favorites]

No, on further investigation, phaedon is correct. But there is a slight amount of diagonally forward motion.
posted by Burhanistan at 12:44 PM on May 11, 2008 [2 favorites]

Rather, it's a side to side, with one slight forward at limit of the left side travel, then two slight forwards at the limit of the right side travel.
posted by Burhanistan at 12:52 PM on May 11, 2008

The MIT one has better music and a scope hooked up to the audio.
posted by TheOnlyCoolTim at 12:57 PM on May 11, 2008 [1 favorite]

Its a great idea but I was expecting to see 6 drunk cheerleaders, 5 members of a band, 4 break dancers, 3 friendly neighbours, 2 amateur DJs and one shifty looking purveyor or narcotics to come through the door just after the fog machine fired up.
posted by rongorongo at 1:17 PM on May 11, 2008

Goes great with my hot chicks room.
posted by Unicorn on the cob at 1:22 PM on May 11, 2008

This overplayed ad features the same song, but the headbopping comments are great when you get the payoff at the end.
posted by ninjew at 1:30 PM on May 11, 2008

It's side to side with diagonally forward motion - "don't do that with your head - that is so *dumb*."
posted by forallmankind at 2:25 PM on May 11, 2008

Well, it's better than a zune party.
posted by stavrogin at 4:41 PM on May 11, 2008 [1 favorite]

Ugh that music!

As soon as I heard it I had to kill the sound lest my colleagues think I'm channeliing some muscle car driving, singlet wearing, gelled boofhead cruising down a nightclub strip.
posted by mattoxic at 4:45 PM on May 11, 2008

Completely unrelated, yet also involving a big red button:

Instant Rimshot
posted by BitterOldPunk at 6:16 PM on May 11, 2008 [1 favorite]

I want one.
posted by caddis at 6:34 PM on May 11, 2008

It's sad. He has an emergency party button. Yet he is still alone.

So, so alone.

One day I predict they will find him dangling from his Emergency Auto-erotic Asphyxiation Button. And worst of all: Months after it's initial activation.
posted by tkchrist at 8:24 PM on May 11, 2008 [1 favorite]

He's married.

And I want one too. And of COURSE it has to play a muscle car driving, singlet wearing, gelled boofhead cruising down a nightclub strip song - that's the point. Duh.

I suppose you can cycle the muscle car driving, singlet wearing, gelled boofhead cruising down a nightclub strip songs you choose to include in your party machine if you like, and that would actually be pretty cool as well.
posted by yhbc at 8:26 PM on May 11, 2008

And how am I gonna react when I see this?

A great big threatening button.

A Great Big Threatening Button Which Must Not Be Pressed Under Any Circumstances. Am I right?

posted by dhartung at 9:57 PM on May 11, 2008

That is the greatest thing ever. I want one desperately.
posted by empath at 10:13 PM on May 11, 2008

I love having a home automation engineer for a boyfriend. This can just go onto the honey-do list.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 10:38 PM on May 11, 2008

I'm sorry, but that key system just isn't doing it for me. It desperately, desperately needs a molly-guard.
posted by darksasami at 1:39 AM on May 12, 2008

I broke the window again...
posted by Samizdata at 10:00 AM on May 12, 2008

Man, I wish I'd known about this before I bought my International Dance Party machine :(
posted by Ogre Lawless at 12:26 PM on May 12, 2008

Down the road from my house there is an antique store, and in the back, amongst all the other dusty items from the long forgotten past, is a wooden box. Inside this box is, what can only be described as, a slab of metal. It's about eight inches long by four inches wide and deep. It feels as if it's quite solid and it easily weighs five or so pounds.

It appears to be almost completely featureless except for a single twist style switch on it's face which is simply labeled "Off" and "On". There are no other obvious contact points, it bears no other marks, and the wooden box is cryptically labeled with nothing more than a few initials.

The switch itself appears to extremely finely milled and the tolerances are exceptionally minute. I can't ascertain the purpose of this device, so in the absence of a clearer explanation, I assumed that it was the remote control for Doomsday. I would have bought it, but it was like $35 and that just seems really pricey just to keep the world safe for a little bit longer.

I now have to concede that there is a chance, albeit slim, that the switch might actually be the original precursor to the Emergency Party Button. So now I might have to buy it and give it a try.

If it starts a party, I'll let everyone know. If it ends the world... Well, I guess you will figure that one out on your own. Sorry in advance.
posted by quin at 2:39 PM on May 12, 2008

quin, I would buy such a thing just because of its intrinsic awesomeness. I would leave it out for people to play with and use it as a sort of Rorschach.
posted by flaterik at 4:48 PM on May 12, 2008

What pure, old-school geekery. The Ultimate Party involves:

- A black light
- A strobe light
- A fog machine
- cheesy music
- A scrolling LED sign displaying party-related messages
- no means at all of inviting guests

At minimum, this thing should be mass-SMSing a list of invitees and ordering pizzas. Liquor too if they're in area where that's possible.
posted by contraption at 10:17 AM on May 13, 2008

For the curious, I did end up buying the giant heavy switch. It took a bit of research, but I found out it's one of these. It's actually really cool, when it's in the 'Off' position, it's nothing but a scary looking paperweight. When you switch it to 'On' it becomes a pretty powerful magnet.

I'm not sure exactly what I'm going to do with it, but I'm fairly certain that it will be tangentially related to world domination.
posted by quin at 5:02 PM on May 18, 2008 [1 favorite]

posted by caddis at 5:18 PM on May 18, 2008

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