Centrists have opinions, too!
June 18, 2009 10:21 AM Subscribe
My Other Bookmark Is The Onion
(I'll stop now)
posted by mippy at 10:24 AM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]
(I'll stop now)
posted by mippy at 10:24 AM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]
meh.
posted by gman at 10:24 AM on June 18, 2009 [5 favorites]
posted by gman at 10:24 AM on June 18, 2009 [5 favorites]
Some are pretty funny, but wtf is up with the weird zooming effect? Is that to give the impression of trying to read a bumper sticker while driving?
posted by HumanComplex at 10:26 AM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]
posted by HumanComplex at 10:26 AM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]
Sadly, war is sometimes the answer. I authorize the government to conduct it in my name.
I get that this is a subtle, nuanced way of interpreting the ever-present, "Support Our Troops." I wish only that they had an equally apathetic and subtle sticker that protested war, however meekly.
posted by explosion at 10:26 AM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]
I get that this is a subtle, nuanced way of interpreting the ever-present, "Support Our Troops." I wish only that they had an equally apathetic and subtle sticker that protested war, however meekly.
posted by explosion at 10:26 AM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]
Despite our current actions, I feel that not shooting brown people might work out better, all things considered.
posted by Pantengliopoli at 10:29 AM on June 18, 2009 [9 favorites]
posted by Pantengliopoli at 10:29 AM on June 18, 2009 [9 favorites]
How about "Sadly, I recognize that my bumper stickers and I can do nothing about our government's decisions regarding involvement in war."
posted by dlugoczaj at 10:29 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by dlugoczaj at 10:29 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
Funny idea ruined by a crappy interface. :-(
posted by TungstenChef at 10:31 AM on June 18, 2009
posted by TungstenChef at 10:31 AM on June 18, 2009
This is a great idea. But I've been wrong before.
posted by Dr-Baa at 10:32 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by Dr-Baa at 10:32 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
I can't help but hear all those phrases spoken by Dr. Lilith Sternin.
posted by fish tick at 10:32 AM on June 18, 2009 [5 favorites]
posted by fish tick at 10:32 AM on June 18, 2009 [5 favorites]
Sadly, war is sometimes the answer. I authorize the government to conduct it in my name.
I get that this is a subtle, nuanced way of interpreting the ever-present, "Support Our Troops." I wish only that they had an equally apathetic and subtle sticker that protested war, however meekly.
Actually, I'm pretty sure it's in response to the "War Is Not The Answer" bumper stickers that are seen all over.
posted by kingbenny at 10:36 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
I get that this is a subtle, nuanced way of interpreting the ever-present, "Support Our Troops." I wish only that they had an equally apathetic and subtle sticker that protested war, however meekly.
Actually, I'm pretty sure it's in response to the "War Is Not The Answer" bumper stickers that are seen all over.
posted by kingbenny at 10:36 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
explosion: "Sadly, war is sometimes the answer. I authorize the government to conduct it in my name.
I get that this is a subtle, nuanced way of interpreting the ever-present, "Support Our Troops." I wish only that they had an equally apathetic and subtle sticker that protested war, however meekly."
I can understand this feeling. Alternately, I think that (speaking only for myself) I don't really need every joke site I visit to adequately represent even a mewling centrist version of my beliefs in order to enjoy it.
not intended to be a criticism of you. apologies if it comes off that way.
posted by shmegegge at 10:36 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
I get that this is a subtle, nuanced way of interpreting the ever-present, "Support Our Troops." I wish only that they had an equally apathetic and subtle sticker that protested war, however meekly."
I can understand this feeling. Alternately, I think that (speaking only for myself) I don't really need every joke site I visit to adequately represent even a mewling centrist version of my beliefs in order to enjoy it.
not intended to be a criticism of you. apologies if it comes off that way.
posted by shmegegge at 10:36 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
Yes, my child may be on board, but I recognize that you are already driving as safely as can be expected, even if only to protect yourself.
I really really like this one. And despise the idea that, if you didn't have a bumper sticker on your car saying that your baby is on board, there's a pretty good chance I'd run you off the road just for fun.
posted by kingbenny at 10:41 AM on June 18, 2009 [6 favorites]
I really really like this one. And despise the idea that, if you didn't have a bumper sticker on your car saying that your baby is on board, there's a pretty good chance I'd run you off the road just for fun.
posted by kingbenny at 10:41 AM on June 18, 2009 [6 favorites]
Some are pretty funny, but wtf is up with the weird zooming effect? Is that to give the impression of trying to read a bumper sticker while driving?
If You Can Read This, You're Too Close.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 10:44 AM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]
If You Can Read This, You're Too Close.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 10:44 AM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]
I don't feel strongly enough to make a comment.
posted by rand at 10:49 AM on June 18, 2009 [4 favorites]
posted by rand at 10:49 AM on June 18, 2009 [4 favorites]
I don't really have anything to add to this discussion, but I'm posting anyway.
posted by gompa at 10:49 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by gompa at 10:49 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
My child attends the local academy of learning and earns better grades than most of his or her classmates.
My pet is smarter than your child who attends the local academy of learning and earns better grades than most of his or her classmates.
posted by gottabefunky at 10:50 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
My pet is smarter than your child who attends the local academy of learning and earns better grades than most of his or her classmates.
posted by gottabefunky at 10:50 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
These are very Canadian.
posted by rokusan at 10:51 AM on June 18, 2009 [6 favorites]
posted by rokusan at 10:51 AM on June 18, 2009 [6 favorites]
My personal beliefs are not for public display.
I love these, btw
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 10:51 AM on June 18, 2009
I love these, btw
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 10:51 AM on June 18, 2009
Honk if you like bumper stickers.
posted by not_on_display at 10:53 AM on June 18, 2009
posted by not_on_display at 10:53 AM on June 18, 2009
I think I have to order "Some of your bumper stickers make me uncomfortable."
I have an old bumper sticker I'd like to cover up anyway. These are fantastic.
posted by threeturtles at 10:54 AM on June 18, 2009
I have an old bumper sticker I'd like to cover up anyway. These are fantastic.
posted by threeturtles at 10:54 AM on June 18, 2009
Just make your own custom bumper stickers. I had one printed up for my first car that I thought was hilarious. It said "I saw a bumper sticker about that once."
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 10:54 AM on June 18, 2009 [4 favorites]
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 10:54 AM on June 18, 2009 [4 favorites]
If you can read this, you can see this sticker.
posted by daniel_charms at 10:56 AM on June 18, 2009 [5 favorites]
posted by daniel_charms at 10:56 AM on June 18, 2009 [5 favorites]
I had one printed up for my first car that I thought was hilarious. It said "I saw a bumper sticker about that once."
Ha ha, that's great! Makes me want one that reads "I opted for the bumper sticker because the t-shirt was too expensive."
posted by Dr-Baa at 10:56 AM on June 18, 2009
Ha ha, that's great! Makes me want one that reads "I opted for the bumper sticker because the t-shirt was too expensive."
posted by Dr-Baa at 10:56 AM on June 18, 2009
These are very Canadian.
I don't know what you're talking aboot.
posted by gman at 10:56 AM on June 18, 2009
I don't know what you're talking aboot.
posted by gman at 10:56 AM on June 18, 2009
There should only be one bumper sticker. Ever. It should say, "I am the type of person who puts bumper stickers on his car." It tells you all you need to know.
posted by uncleozzy at 10:59 AM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]
posted by uncleozzy at 10:59 AM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]
I used to park in a ramp next to someone with a black magnetic 'ribbon' attached to the back of their car that said "Stamp Out Vehicle Magnets".
Never ran into them in person to ask where they got it.
posted by gimonca at 11:00 AM on June 18, 2009
Never ran into them in person to ask where they got it.
posted by gimonca at 11:00 AM on June 18, 2009
Well, I have been wanting to get something to cover the Obama sticker.
posted by box at 11:03 AM on June 18, 2009
posted by box at 11:03 AM on June 18, 2009
Oh, that reminds me! I had the "I support the magnetic ribbon manufacturing industry" ribbon until it (inevitably) got taken off by some thieving stealer.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 11:03 AM on June 18, 2009
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 11:03 AM on June 18, 2009
I'm making this comment only to get this thread onto my recent comments activity page.
Oh, and also to say the one I personally want is "I'd rather be engaging in any one of the several activities I enjoy more than driving."
posted by jacquilynne at 11:03 AM on June 18, 2009
Oh, and also to say the one I personally want is "I'd rather be engaging in any one of the several activities I enjoy more than driving."
posted by jacquilynne at 11:03 AM on June 18, 2009
Seconding Ambrosia Voyeur--cafepress makes it really easy, either as a one-off, or to share (and sell). I sold a ridiculous number of That One '08 stickers last fall, raising over $800 for the Obama campaign.
posted by MrMoonPie at 11:04 AM on June 18, 2009
posted by MrMoonPie at 11:04 AM on June 18, 2009
Honk If You Have Bumper Sticker Mentality.
posted by MiltonRandKalman at 11:06 AM on June 18, 2009
posted by MiltonRandKalman at 11:06 AM on June 18, 2009
"I Support A Specific Point Of View"
posted by GuyZero at 11:07 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by GuyZero at 11:07 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
The depiction of feet on my fish indicates my intellectual superiority to those of you whose fish are not similarly equipped.
posted by fish tick at 11:08 AM on June 18, 2009 [6 favorites]
posted by fish tick at 11:08 AM on June 18, 2009 [6 favorites]
Please query me regarding my children's children
posted by horsemuth at 11:12 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by horsemuth at 11:12 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
I am fond of my mixed-breed domestic pet.
posted by yhbc at 11:13 AM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
posted by yhbc at 11:13 AM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
hmm, this might be better:
"Please query me regarding the children of my children"
posted by horsemuth at 11:15 AM on June 18, 2009
"Please query me regarding the children of my children"
posted by horsemuth at 11:15 AM on June 18, 2009
This car was able to be driven to the top of Mt. Washington. Just like any reasonably well-maintained vehicle should be able to do.
posted by yhbc at 11:15 AM on June 18, 2009 [10 favorites]
posted by yhbc at 11:15 AM on June 18, 2009 [10 favorites]
It's complicated.
posted by box at 11:17 AM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
posted by box at 11:17 AM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
I took my family to a large theme amusement park, and neglected to tell them to not put a bumper sticker on my car while it was in the parking lot.
posted by yhbc at 11:17 AM on June 18, 2009
posted by yhbc at 11:17 AM on June 18, 2009
Dinosaur Comics for a while carried "You'll Thank Me When You Share My Politics," which is on my boyfriend's bike but no longer sold. I love that one.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 11:18 AM on June 18, 2009
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 11:18 AM on June 18, 2009
The challeges I face today are likely to be similar to those I faced yesterday.
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 11:18 AM on June 18, 2009
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 11:18 AM on June 18, 2009
You can have my gun after we negotiate mutually-agreeable terms of sale.
posted by box at 11:18 AM on June 18, 2009 [16 favorites]
posted by box at 11:18 AM on June 18, 2009 [16 favorites]
From the tag cloud:
...environmentalism green ha-ha i'd rather be jesus meta...
Sometimes I love alphabetical order.
posted by darksasami at 11:20 AM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
...environmentalism green ha-ha i'd rather be jesus meta...
Sometimes I love alphabetical order.
posted by darksasami at 11:20 AM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
gimonca - it could have been a custom thing from Support Our Ribbons.
posted by anthom at 11:20 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by anthom at 11:20 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
Some people enjoy country and Western music, but I am not one of them.
It would be wildly ineffective to require the military to offset the purchase of equipment through the sale of baked goods.
posted by indiebass at 11:21 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
It would be wildly ineffective to require the military to offset the purchase of equipment through the sale of baked goods.
posted by indiebass at 11:21 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
My child is a C student at an unexceptional public middle school.
posted by the littlest brussels sprout at 11:23 AM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
posted by the littlest brussels sprout at 11:23 AM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
I took my family to a large theme amusement park, and neglected to tell them to not put a bumper sticker on my car while it was in the parking lot.
Ha! I worked at The Mystery Spot for a whole year, giving tours and handing out bumper stickers, though they did stick them on your car while you toured at one point in the past, and believe it or not, WIRED them on before bumpers were seamless molded plastic. I used a box of those in lieu of packing tape when I moved house, so ubiquitous in my environment were those obnoxious things.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 11:23 AM on June 18, 2009
Ha! I worked at The Mystery Spot for a whole year, giving tours and handing out bumper stickers, though they did stick them on your car while you toured at one point in the past, and believe it or not, WIRED them on before bumpers were seamless molded plastic. I used a box of those in lieu of packing tape when I moved house, so ubiquitous in my environment were those obnoxious things.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 11:23 AM on June 18, 2009
While I may occasionally permit people to ride short distances for free, I would appreciate at least the offer of compensation, ideally in the form of either sex, money or marijuana.
posted by box at 11:25 AM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
posted by box at 11:25 AM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
I'd like to make a worthwhile comment, but that would require a worthwhile post.
posted by oddman at 11:26 AM on June 18, 2009
posted by oddman at 11:26 AM on June 18, 2009
I can't help but hear all those phrases spoken by Dr. Lilith Sternin.
Funny--for me it was Hank Hill. Particularly the one about engaging in activities other than driving.
posted by dlugoczaj at 11:27 AM on June 18, 2009
Funny--for me it was Hank Hill. Particularly the one about engaging in activities other than driving.
posted by dlugoczaj at 11:27 AM on June 18, 2009
Goddamn the Mystery Spot straight to hell. (I'm bitter about being sold a ticket for a trick maze)
posted by Dr-Baa at 11:27 AM on June 18, 2009
posted by Dr-Baa at 11:27 AM on June 18, 2009
This vehicle's auditory signalling device is nonfunctional, therefore be advised that indication by means of phalageal extension may be expected.
posted by fish tick at 11:28 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by fish tick at 11:28 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
I have nothing to add.
posted by blue_beetle at 11:28 AM on June 18, 2009
posted by blue_beetle at 11:28 AM on June 18, 2009
I'm sort of bothered by the assertion that "war is sometimes the answer" is a sane, rational and centrist opinion on par with the rest. Between that and the crappy zoom functionality any fun this had was sort of sucked away. But then I make no pretenses toward being a centrist.
posted by graymouser at 11:30 AM on June 18, 2009
posted by graymouser at 11:30 AM on June 18, 2009
My other collection of verbose deadpan humor that's often reminiscent of this, but arguably funnier, more prolific, and more elegantly formatted is McSweeney's Lists. Including bumper stickers. Also, deadpan jokes.
posted by Jaltcoh at 11:30 AM on June 18, 2009
posted by Jaltcoh at 11:30 AM on June 18, 2009
Honk if you like honking.
So that I might find you and put this bumper sticker over your face, you stupid honk-happy asshole.
posted by marginaliana at 11:31 AM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
So that I might find you and put this bumper sticker over your face, you stupid honk-happy asshole.
posted by marginaliana at 11:31 AM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
I am of the opinion that many different religions should be able to exist at the same time, which, upon reflection, they do already; so I guess I am not sure what my point is exactly.
posted by ND¢ at 11:31 AM on June 18, 2009 [8 favorites]
posted by ND¢ at 11:31 AM on June 18, 2009 [8 favorites]
Sadly, war is sometimes the answer. I authorize the government to conduct it in my name.
I get that this is a subtle, nuanced way of interpreting the ever-present, "Support Our Troops." I wish only that they had an equally apathetic and subtle sticker that protested war, however meekly.
Actually, I'm pretty sure it's in response to the "War Is Not The Answer" bumper stickers that are seen all over.
Yes, and also the "Not In My Name" bumper stickers.
posted by Jaltcoh at 11:33 AM on June 18, 2009
I get that this is a subtle, nuanced way of interpreting the ever-present, "Support Our Troops." I wish only that they had an equally apathetic and subtle sticker that protested war, however meekly.
Actually, I'm pretty sure it's in response to the "War Is Not The Answer" bumper stickers that are seen all over.
Yes, and also the "Not In My Name" bumper stickers.
posted by Jaltcoh at 11:33 AM on June 18, 2009
I really really like this one. And despise the idea that, if you didn't have a bumper sticker on your car saying that your baby is on board, there's a pretty good chance I'd run you off the road just for fun.
Not to spoil the joke, but those signs were originally conceived after a child was overlooked by rescuers in a severe car accident, and subsequently died for lack of medical attention (sorry, I don't have a cite, just a memory of articles on the subject when the signs first came out.) Of course, they're mostly useless; most people misinterpret them, and parents often drive around with the signs up when their children aren't in the car.
Anyhoo, I always wanted to print this one up (and likely will soon as my kids hit grade school age): "My child's accomplishments do not fit on a bumper sticker."
posted by davejay at 11:34 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
Not to spoil the joke, but those signs were originally conceived after a child was overlooked by rescuers in a severe car accident, and subsequently died for lack of medical attention (sorry, I don't have a cite, just a memory of articles on the subject when the signs first came out.) Of course, they're mostly useless; most people misinterpret them, and parents often drive around with the signs up when their children aren't in the car.
Anyhoo, I always wanted to print this one up (and likely will soon as my kids hit grade school age): "My child's accomplishments do not fit on a bumper sticker."
posted by davejay at 11:34 AM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
Some of these are hilarious.
posted by metastability at 11:35 AM on June 18, 2009
posted by metastability at 11:35 AM on June 18, 2009
If this vehicle is moving in a rhythmic fashion despite being parked, the occupants are likely having sex and would prefer not to be disturbed.
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 11:36 AM on June 18, 2009 [4 favorites]
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 11:36 AM on June 18, 2009 [4 favorites]
Honk If You Love Noise Pollution
posted by Cookiebastard at 11:36 AM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
posted by Cookiebastard at 11:36 AM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
"Single issue voter"
posted by modernnomad at 11:39 AM on June 18, 2009
posted by modernnomad at 11:39 AM on June 18, 2009
"My other vehicle has a similar sticker"
posted by daniel_charms at 11:41 AM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]
posted by daniel_charms at 11:41 AM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]
These are good, though still not good enough that I would put one on the car. Similarly, I have been for some years trying to think of a tattoo "meta" enough to actually have tattooed, but I cannot think of a tattoo that sufficiently undermines the very idea of tattoos.
Maybe a plate, with some beans on it.
posted by everichon at 11:46 AM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
Maybe a plate, with some beans on it.
posted by everichon at 11:46 AM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
My other car ate your honor student.
posted by brundlefly at 11:49 AM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
posted by brundlefly at 11:49 AM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
If You Can Read This, You're Too Close.
⠠⠃⠗⠁⠊⠇⠇⠑
posted by Eideteker at 11:50 AM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
⠠⠃⠗⠁⠊⠇⠇⠑
posted by Eideteker at 11:50 AM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
Your shameful pride in your honor student brings great dishonor on your family.
posted by Eideteker at 11:51 AM on June 18, 2009 [6 favorites]
posted by Eideteker at 11:51 AM on June 18, 2009 [6 favorites]
If I can safely do so, I will swerve, slow down or otherwise avoid hitting an animal with my car.
posted by box at 11:59 AM on June 18, 2009
posted by box at 11:59 AM on June 18, 2009
The best bumper sticker I've ever seen was on my friend's car: Nuke an unborn gay baby whale for Jesus.
posted by spikeleemajortomdickandharryconnickjrmints at 12:10 PM on June 18, 2009
posted by spikeleemajortomdickandharryconnickjrmints at 12:10 PM on June 18, 2009
I brake occasionally.
posted by Eideteker at 12:10 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by Eideteker at 12:10 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
Someone from the Walker Art Museum in Minneapolis sent me a "Think about honking if you <3 conceptual art."
I thought it was cute, and seriously considered sticking it on my car.
posted by elmer benson at 12:14 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
I thought it was cute, and seriously considered sticking it on my car.
posted by elmer benson at 12:14 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
OH! Embarrassing. I finally just got that <3 is a heart. I thought it was an ice cream cone, which made no sense.
posted by msalt at 12:21 PM on June 18, 2009
posted by msalt at 12:21 PM on June 18, 2009
I've always wanted one that says, "Private bumper sticker: do not read."
posted by litterateur at 12:29 PM on June 18, 2009
posted by litterateur at 12:29 PM on June 18, 2009
"Old soldiers do, in fact, die."
posted by BitterOldPunk at 12:39 PM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]
posted by BitterOldPunk at 12:39 PM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]
I want to put a "honk if you're horny" sticker on my car the next time I go to India and just to witness everyone turn into raving nymphomaniacs.
posted by MuffinMan at 12:40 PM on June 18, 2009
posted by MuffinMan at 12:40 PM on June 18, 2009
This body climbed Mount Washington.
If selling babies for profit is wrong, I don't want to be right.
posted by A dead Quaker at 12:44 PM on June 18, 2009
If selling babies for profit is wrong, I don't want to be right.
posted by A dead Quaker at 12:44 PM on June 18, 2009
"caution! i brake for insects"
posted by kitchenrat at 12:46 PM on June 18, 2009
posted by kitchenrat at 12:46 PM on June 18, 2009
What zoom interface? No zoom for me.
And <3 is not a scrotum? Since when?
posted by Xoebe at 12:48 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
And <3 is not a scrotum? Since when?
posted by Xoebe at 12:48 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
Made with Pride, Greed, Envy, Wrath, Lust, Gluttony and Sloth.
I'd rather not use bumper stickers to express my opinions.
posted by Tuesday After Lunch at 12:54 PM on June 18, 2009
I'd rather not use bumper stickers to express my opinions.
posted by Tuesday After Lunch at 12:54 PM on June 18, 2009
I brake just like a little guuuurl
posted by Dr Dracator at 1:09 PM on June 18, 2009
posted by Dr Dracator at 1:09 PM on June 18, 2009
I am willing to provide chauffeur services only upon offer of compensation via barter or the sharing of operating expenses.
Yell "Jesus!" if you love to honk.
posted by Greg_Ace at 1:15 PM on June 18, 2009
Yell "Jesus!" if you love to honk.
posted by Greg_Ace at 1:15 PM on June 18, 2009
And <3 is not a scrotum? Since when?
Ouch! Remind me not to use your mohel.
posted by msalt at 1:15 PM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]
Ouch! Remind me not to use your mohel.
posted by msalt at 1:15 PM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]
I always wanted one that said "I'd rather be driving."
posted by Sculthorpe at 1:17 PM on June 18, 2009
posted by Sculthorpe at 1:17 PM on June 18, 2009
If you can read this you're literate.
posted by gottabefunky at 1:18 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by gottabefunky at 1:18 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
I could go either way on a lot of things.
Frankly, I don't think a bumper sticker extolling the pleasures of bi-sexuality to be exactly what I would call "centrist."
Or did I misread that one?
posted by slickvaguely at 1:22 PM on June 18, 2009
Frankly, I don't think a bumper sticker extolling the pleasures of bi-sexuality to be exactly what I would call "centrist."
Or did I misread that one?
posted by slickvaguely at 1:22 PM on June 18, 2009
I've always wanted one that said, 'This car climbed Mt. Vesuvius'
Also, on the wildly offensive side, 'Have you slapped a feminist today?'
But you can actually buy this.
posted by Confess, Fletch at 1:23 PM on June 18, 2009
Also, on the wildly offensive side, 'Have you slapped a feminist today?'
But you can actually buy this.
posted by Confess, Fletch at 1:23 PM on June 18, 2009
And <3 is not a scrotum? Since when?
Well I'll never look at that little heart the same again.
posted by !Jim at 1:30 PM on June 18, 2009
Well I'll never look at that little heart the same again.
posted by !Jim at 1:30 PM on June 18, 2009
I always thought that "Baby On Board" tags loosely translated into "I know I'm driving way too slow and cautiously, but I'm brand new to parenting and I'm afraid I'm going to break my kid, so forgive me, don't honk, I'm not 80."
Also, the zooming thing is because it's a Zazzle store, they all do that, it works great on stores that sell T-shirts, not so hot on the horizontal stuff.
posted by sageleaf at 1:36 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
Also, the zooming thing is because it's a Zazzle store, they all do that, it works great on stores that sell T-shirts, not so hot on the horizontal stuff.
posted by sageleaf at 1:36 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
It's not without its flaws, but New York is, all in all, pretty okay.
posted by box at 1:37 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by box at 1:37 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
While I might drink a cheap beer at a baseball game, or a bar with a limited selection, or after mowing the lawn or something, I generally prefer more flavorful options, e.g., Warsteiner.
posted by box at 1:51 PM on June 18, 2009
posted by box at 1:51 PM on June 18, 2009
If you can read this, you're literate.
posted by Debaser626 at 1:52 PM on June 18, 2009
posted by Debaser626 at 1:52 PM on June 18, 2009
If this vehicle is rocking, or moving in a generally unforeseen way, do not bother signaling for my attention. I am busy making love.
posted by uaudio at 1:55 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by uaudio at 1:55 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
This car is a fully functional Death Star.... If by Death Star one means a late model sedan in which no options were purchased due to the imbibing of far too many of a certain beverage over several years, culminating in a loss of employment shortly followed thereafter with the near inevitable domestic cessation and brief custody battle... Ummm....
PEW PEW PEW!!!!!
posted by Debaser626 at 1:57 PM on June 18, 2009
PEW PEW PEW!!!!!
posted by Debaser626 at 1:57 PM on June 18, 2009
Darn. stupidsexyflanders beat me to it. My response to this: stupid sexy Flanders!
posted by uaudio at 1:59 PM on June 18, 2009
posted by uaudio at 1:59 PM on June 18, 2009
those signs were originally conceived after a child was overlooked by rescuers in a severe car accident... most people misinterpret them, and parents often drive around with the signs up when their children aren't in the car.
So, almost exactly like the "iCi" window stickers?
I brake for roadway obstructions.
posted by blenderfish at 2:07 PM on June 18, 2009
So, almost exactly like the "iCi" window stickers?
I brake for roadway obstructions.
posted by blenderfish at 2:07 PM on June 18, 2009
Not to spoil the joke, but those signs were originally conceived after a child was overlooked by rescuers in a severe car accident, and subsequently died for lack of medical attention (sorry, I don't have a cite, just a memory of articles on the subject when the signs first came out.) Of course, they're mostly useless; most people misinterpret them, and parents often drive around with the signs up when their children aren't in the car.
I always thought that "Baby On Board" tags loosely translated into "I know I'm driving way too slow and cautiously, but I'm brand new to parenting and I'm afraid I'm going to break my kid, so forgive me, don't honk, I'm not 80."
It will be good for me to recall these more charitable ideas about the usefulness of said stickers when I see them.
posted by kingbenny at 2:17 PM on June 18, 2009
I always thought that "Baby On Board" tags loosely translated into "I know I'm driving way too slow and cautiously, but I'm brand new to parenting and I'm afraid I'm going to break my kid, so forgive me, don't honk, I'm not 80."
It will be good for me to recall these more charitable ideas about the usefulness of said stickers when I see them.
posted by kingbenny at 2:17 PM on June 18, 2009
Years ago there was a David Letterman monologue where he joked about seeing a car with a "Baby On Board"-style window sign that read "Dead Body In Trunk". I've wanted one of these signs ever since.
posted by spoobnooble at 2:24 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by spoobnooble at 2:24 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
So, almost exactly like the "iCi" window stickers?
posted by blenderfish at 2:07 PM on June 18 [+] [!]
Those are used by Quebeckers, to indicate they are "here".
posted by spoobnooble at 2:26 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by blenderfish at 2:07 PM on June 18 [+] [!]
Those are used by Quebeckers, to indicate they are "here".
posted by spoobnooble at 2:26 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
The signs actually say i⊂i, indicating that the car in question is a subset of itself.
Quite possibly this indicated that i 8912; i as well. Though perhaps that won't even render properly.
posted by GuyZero at 2:29 PM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
Quite possibly this indicated that i 8912; i as well. Though perhaps that won't even render properly.
posted by GuyZero at 2:29 PM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]
Those are used by Quebeckers, to indicate they are "here".
Presumably so fire fighters know they can skip that window?
I keed, I keed.
posted by blenderfish at 2:49 PM on June 18, 2009
Presumably so fire fighters know they can skip that window?
I keed, I keed.
posted by blenderfish at 2:49 PM on June 18, 2009
Made with Pride, Greed, Envy, Wrath, Lust, Gluttony and Sloth.
of all the good ones in this thread, that is the best.
and may I contribute:
"If you're reading this, you're not watching the road"
"I'd like to see a copy of your Honor Student's Permanent Record, just to be sure"
“I’m so far behind, I’ve lapped myself”
“Irreverent Never Regrets”
“If it ain’t broke, you’re not using it enough”
“A Breakfast Without Orange Juice Is An Early Lunch”
(borrowed from the late George Carlin) “If you don’t pray in my school, I won’t think in your church”
"I used to be disgusted, but I tried to be amused, and it didn't work"
“If It’s Crappy and You Know It, Poop Your Pants!”
“My Grown Kid Was An Honor Student And Still Makes Less Than I Did At The Same Age”
“Jesus Is Coming… Zoom In For The Money Shot”
posted by wendell at 2:49 PM on June 18, 2009
of all the good ones in this thread, that is the best.
and may I contribute:
"If you're reading this, you're not watching the road"
"I'd like to see a copy of your Honor Student's Permanent Record, just to be sure"
“I’m so far behind, I’ve lapped myself”
“Irreverent Never Regrets”
“If it ain’t broke, you’re not using it enough”
“A Breakfast Without Orange Juice Is An Early Lunch”
(borrowed from the late George Carlin) “If you don’t pray in my school, I won’t think in your church”
"I used to be disgusted, but I tried to be amused, and it didn't work"
“If It’s Crappy and You Know It, Poop Your Pants!”
“My Grown Kid Was An Honor Student And Still Makes Less Than I Did At The Same Age”
“Jesus Is Coming… Zoom In For The Money Shot”
posted by wendell at 2:49 PM on June 18, 2009
"Baby On Board, but don't worry, he's not the one driving"
posted by wendell at 2:51 PM on June 18, 2009
posted by wendell at 2:51 PM on June 18, 2009
One of my great disappointments is that if you climb Mount Washington without a car, you don't get a sticker.
posted by smackfu at 2:57 PM on June 18, 2009
posted by smackfu at 2:57 PM on June 18, 2009
Question Some Things Appropriately And Within Reason
posted by Greg_Ace at 3:49 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by Greg_Ace at 3:49 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
These are very Canadian.
Nah, Canadians wouldn't even bother with bumper stickers, unless they're immigrants showing off their affiliation with the motherland.
posted by emeiji at 4:17 PM on June 18, 2009
Nah, Canadians wouldn't even bother with bumper stickers, unless they're immigrants showing off their affiliation with the motherland.
posted by emeiji at 4:17 PM on June 18, 2009
I don't know whether this would fit on a bumper sticker, but the results of a municipal election in Berkeley CA were once summarized in the local weekly as:
What do we want? Gradual change!
When do we want it? In due course!
posted by Multicellular Exothermic at 5:33 PM on June 18, 2009 [8 favorites]
What do we want? Gradual change!
When do we want it? In due course!
posted by Multicellular Exothermic at 5:33 PM on June 18, 2009 [8 favorites]
My child is inmate of the month at the county jail.
posted by leftcoastbob at 6:06 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by leftcoastbob at 6:06 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]
"but those signs were originally conceived after a child was overlooked by rescuers in a severe car accident, and subsequently died for lack of medical attention"
Probably a greater risk before the widespread use of car seats.
My favourite bumper sticker: In red text "If this sticker is blue, you're driving too fast!"
posted by Mitheral at 6:21 PM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]
Probably a greater risk before the widespread use of car seats.
My favourite bumper sticker: In red text "If this sticker is blue, you're driving too fast!"
posted by Mitheral at 6:21 PM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]
Too many little words on too many of those bumper stickers.
posted by jfrancis at 6:46 PM on June 18, 2009
posted by jfrancis at 6:46 PM on June 18, 2009
This bumper sticker is a clever . . . [more inside]
posted by exlotuseater at 7:08 PM on June 18, 2009
posted by exlotuseater at 7:08 PM on June 18, 2009
I have, for years, had an ambition to make a bumper sticker that says:
If you're outraged, you should stop paying so much attention and try meditation for a while
posted by koeselitz at 9:49 PM on June 18, 2009
If you're outraged, you should stop paying so much attention and try meditation for a while
posted by koeselitz at 9:49 PM on June 18, 2009
I once saw a Prius with a bumper sticker that said "I Hate The Earth". I liked that.
posted by padraigin at 10:07 PM on June 18, 2009
posted by padraigin at 10:07 PM on June 18, 2009
...but I cannot think of a tattoo that sufficiently undermines the very idea of tattoos.
How about the Chinese glyph for "ink"?
or perhaps "permanence."
posted by davejay at 1:56 AM on June 19, 2009
How about the Chinese glyph for "ink"?
or perhaps "permanence."
posted by davejay at 1:56 AM on June 19, 2009
padraigin: I once saw a Prius with a bumper sticker that said "I Hate The Earth". I liked that.
Heh—I once saw a Hummer with a bumper sticker that said, I'm Doing My Part For The Environment!
I had a feeling that one wasn't put on by the owner.
posted by koeselitz at 3:42 AM on June 19, 2009
Heh—I once saw a Hummer with a bumper sticker that said, I'm Doing My Part For The Environment!
I had a feeling that one wasn't put on by the owner.
posted by koeselitz at 3:42 AM on June 19, 2009
Somebody or other sells 'I'm Contributing to Global Climate Change--Ask Me How' stickers that are at least partially intended to be put on gas-hog vehicles guerrilla-style.
posted by box at 6:06 AM on June 19, 2009
posted by box at 6:06 AM on June 19, 2009
One of my great disappointments is that if you climb Mount Washington without a car, you don't get a sticker.
You should be able to get something. A friend of mine has "The Driver of this Car Ran Mount Washington."
posted by dlugoczaj at 6:11 AM on June 19, 2009
You should be able to get something. A friend of mine has "The Driver of this Car Ran Mount Washington."
posted by dlugoczaj at 6:11 AM on June 19, 2009
Heh—I once saw a Hummer with a bumper sticker that said, I'm Doing My Part For The Environment!
I had a feeling that one wasn't put on by the owner.
20 of these were the best $10 I ever spent.
posted by Mayor West at 7:06 AM on June 19, 2009 [2 favorites]
I had a feeling that one wasn't put on by the owner.
20 of these were the best $10 I ever spent.
posted by Mayor West at 7:06 AM on June 19, 2009 [2 favorites]
When I go out for my daily walk in my neighbourhood, and my neighbours have parked their cars across the sidewalk instead of properly in their driveway, I'm always tempted to bring along some post it notes with "Sidewalks are for walking, not parking" written on them. But everyone would know who did it, so I don't.
posted by jacquilynne at 7:45 AM on June 19, 2009
posted by jacquilynne at 7:45 AM on June 19, 2009
I remember when I was a teenager, one of the older kids in my friends' neighborhood drove his car through someone's living-room window. The local paper ran a photo. Barely visible in the photo, on the rear bumper sticking out of the bay window, was a sticker that said:
SHIT HAPPENS
posted by not_on_display at 8:02 AM on June 19, 2009
SHIT HAPPENS
posted by not_on_display at 8:02 AM on June 19, 2009
When I go out for my daily walk in my neighbourhood, and my neighbours have parked their cars across the sidewalk instead of properly in their driveway, I'm always tempted to bring along some post it notes with "Sidewalks are for walking, not parking" written on them.
You're going to like these guys then. Their most most visible action has been the donkey sticker, which they encourage people to download, print out and stick on cars parked in an obstructing manner. The text says "I'm an ass - I park wherever I like".
posted by Dr Dracator at 10:28 AM on June 19, 2009
You're going to like these guys then. Their most most visible action has been the donkey sticker, which they encourage people to download, print out and stick on cars parked in an obstructing manner. The text says "I'm an ass - I park wherever I like".
posted by Dr Dracator at 10:28 AM on June 19, 2009
wtf is up with the weird zooming effect?
I'm guessing it's some lame attempt at DRM. To keep you from printing one of them out and scotch-taping it to your car.
posted by straight at 10:45 AM on June 19, 2009
I'm guessing it's some lame attempt at DRM. To keep you from printing one of them out and scotch-taping it to your car.
posted by straight at 10:45 AM on June 19, 2009
I saw one the other day that said "I'd Rather Be" I don't know if the rest of it was missing or it was supposed to be that way, but it struck me as nicely Zen.
posted by The otter lady at 11:24 AM on June 19, 2009
posted by The otter lady at 11:24 AM on June 19, 2009
This is my only vehicle.
posted by molybdenumblue at 2:45 PM on June 19, 2009
posted by molybdenumblue at 2:45 PM on June 19, 2009
20 of these were the best $10 I ever spent.
Please bear in mind that some of us are physically incapable of parking correctly, despite the best intentions. I have never had a passenger who has not commented on my terrible, laughable parking skills.
posted by the littlest brussels sprout at 1:03 PM on June 20, 2009
Please bear in mind that some of us are physically incapable of parking correctly, despite the best intentions. I have never had a passenger who has not commented on my terrible, laughable parking skills.
posted by the littlest brussels sprout at 1:03 PM on June 20, 2009
Powered By Gasoline
posted by nonmyopicdave at 2:38 PM on June 20, 2009
posted by nonmyopicdave at 2:38 PM on June 20, 2009
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posted by mippy at 10:23 AM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]