He'd rather have a buffalo take a diarrhea dump in his ear
June 23, 2009 1:55 PM   Subscribe

(NSFW) The Angry Video Game Nerd (taking a cue from seanbaby's lead) has been producing video reviews of some of the most notoriously awful NES games, from Top Gun to Bible Games. (Can't miss: The Power Glove.) Not content to go after one system, he's upgraded his range to take on other colossal failures like the Atari Jaguar, Superman 64, and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III (the movie). His newest series of videos, You Know What's Bullshit?, takes on everyday nuances like DVD box sets. He may be vulgar and his vignettes silly, but damn straight he's got a point. Enjoy all his archived videos here, spanning five years of obscenity-laced love/hate for his greatest passions.
posted by Christ, what an asshole (18 comments total) 7 users marked this as a favorite
You posted this just for an eponysterical, didn't you?
posted by Decimask at 2:09 PM on June 23, 2009 [4 favorites]


And yes, his reviews are hilarious and awesome. The Top Gun one mirrors my childhood experience with that game perfectly. (I love when he nails the landing with, I think, the Power Glove or one of the other terrible controllers he reviews)
posted by furiousxgeorge at 2:13 PM on June 23, 2009 [1 favorite]

Am I the only one who is getting sick of the 'Nerd Ranting About Something All Other Nerds Universally Know Is Awful' routine? Seriously, next to porn and Star Trek, it seems to be the internet's stock in trade.
posted by Effigy2000 at 2:14 PM on June 23, 2009 [3 favorites]

He's funny, but sometimes it seems like his obscenity is a crutch for lack of actual writing skill. I can only hear him say that he'd rather hear the sound of a moose about to have rancid diarhea in his mouth than the soundtrack of x horrible video game so many times.

I mean, weren't there hundreds of Wesley Willis songs that basically said the same thing, but willis, unlike this guy was certifiably mentally ill.

Off topic, but the one time i got to see Willis before his death he was giving headbutts and drawing before the show. I went to meet him, and rather then butting heads with me, he just sat there, holding my hand. It was really really weird.

Back on topic, Zero Punctuation is far more clever (i know he doesn't do "retro-bad games", but i think,style wise, they are comparable).
posted by djduckie at 2:17 PM on June 23, 2009 [1 favorite]

Nerd Person Ranting About Something All Other Nerds Like-Minded People Universally Know Is Awful ... seems to be the internet's stock in trade.

Would you prefer he ranted about something you didn't realize sucked? Comedy is often saying something people already know, but putting it in a different way. If you didn't agree with the comedian, then the joke (usually) is not funny.
posted by filthy light thief at 2:20 PM on June 23, 2009 [2 favorites]

I completely went to his website to hate on what he does... But I have to admit, that piece on DVDs has exactly EVER complaint I've ever had about DVDs, EVER, in one glorious rant, complete with in-line illustrations. I'll have to dig around a bit more and see if he continues to be as spot-on with his observations.

One caveat -- I sort of like the packaging of some of my DVD sets... But the ones he's showing on the screen... well, that's really pretty fucking too much packaging, I have to say.
posted by hippybear at 2:24 PM on June 23, 2009

... Top Gun's not as hard as he says it is. I remember the game being pretty lame, though, just because of how easy it is to circumvent nearly every enemy by flying at 30,000 feet. Back in the day I used that to get to the 4th level, then refused to play the game ever again.

But, uh, yeah, the way he hates on Top Gun is so annoying that it almost made me want to play it, just because, whatever its faults may be, at the very least it's not the Angry Video Game Nerd.
posted by You Can't Tip a Buick at 2:40 PM on June 23, 2009

"Did you ever notice how annoying DVD packaging is?"

I think this guy is Andy Rooney's grandson.
posted by Ratio at 2:43 PM on June 23, 2009 [6 favorites]

Is it just me, or does blip.tv absolutely suck at streaming video smoothly?
posted by strangecargo at 2:52 PM on June 23, 2009

Landing the plane in Top Gun is the second-easiest part of the game, if you don't go deliberately brain-dead and reverse the up/down control that you've been using the entire time to that point.

The easiest part is, of course, what You Can't Tip a Buick said: Just keep the nose of the plane pointed up until the game forces you to land or blow up the Space Shuttle.
posted by dirigibleman at 2:57 PM on June 23, 2009

He's like a little kid who just learned how to curse. His idea of "humor" appears to be yelling some moronic combination of random curse words like "FUCKTITTY SHITMONKEYS!" and saying "fuck" every other word. Unfortunately that isn't unique to him, but it's never funny and always annoying when someone does it.
posted by DecemberBoy at 3:16 PM on June 23, 2009 [2 favorites]

This kid is way angrier (NSFW: Swearing)
posted by bitteroldman at 5:45 PM on June 23, 2009


posted by secret about box at 7:55 PM on June 23, 2009

Am I the only one who is getting sick of the 'Nerd Ranting About Something All Other Nerds Universally Know Is Awful' routine?

I joined Metafilter specifically to join a group of nerds ranting about things other nerds universally know are awful.
posted by Hoopo at 9:02 PM on June 23, 2009 [2 favorites]

Does he still act like he is hardcore because he ZOMG SWEARZ and drink Rolling Rock like he's in a commercial?

I hate this guy.
posted by paisley henosis at 10:48 PM on June 23, 2009

Apparently in the "this is bullshit" ones he neither swears like a 5 year old nor drinks Rolling Rock. Improvements, both.

Also, in the second half of the "DVD boxed sets" link he lays out the exact case for why download a movie is more appealing than paying for it.
posted by paisley henosis at 11:07 PM on June 23, 2009

I think this guy is Andy Rooney's grandson.

Holy cow you aren't kidding. I haven't watched much of his work for a while, because, while I find frustrating old games quite hilarious, I don't really think they require the amount of swearing he produces for them. I get the humor, I just don't find it funny.

That Bullshit Man clip is a lot less swearing, and a lot more Rooney-like. I'm simultaneously glad he's leaving the crutch behind and a bit disturbed that a new Andy is in our midst. At least his rants still make sense.
posted by graventy at 7:08 AM on June 24, 2009

posted by juiceCake at 8:37 AM on June 24, 2009

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