The Best Phallic Image You Will See in the News Today

July 17, 2009 8:17 PM

A week ago, when Oscar F. Mayer, retired chairman of the Oscar Mayer meats company and grandson of the Original Oscar, passed away at 95, he left instructions that the Wienermobile NOT appear at his funeral because "it would be too much of a spectacle." Well, today, there was a bit of a spectacle as one of the iconic vehicles crashed into the side of a house in Racine, Wisconsin. There is a Wienermobile Blog written by the team of drivers but they have no statement there on this incident (yet).
Previ-ously
posted by wendell (30 comments total)

Tell you what, buddy, that wiener's sure 'nuff wedged into there. That's one wedged-in wiener, I'm a-tellin you what.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 8:24 PM on July 17, 2009

.
posted by First Post at 8:25 PM on July 17, 2009

In (somewhat) related news: Russians Love Hairy Weiners.
posted by ericb at 8:34 PM on July 17, 2009 [2 favorites]

The driver couldn't help it. This (nsfw) was in the driveway.
posted by mr_crash_davis mark II: Jazz Odyssey at 8:41 PM on July 17, 2009 [3 favorites]

OH THE HUGE WEINETY
posted by Inspector.Gadget at 8:42 PM on July 17, 2009 [2 favorites]

Browsing the links, I've never seen a Wienermobile up close (virtually) before and had no idea they looked so ... space age. Pretty neat! I like this photo.
posted by bettafish at 8:45 PM on July 17, 2009

Weinermobile Gets the Boot Near the Pentagon. Numerous puns related to pork products ensue.
posted by jonp72 at 8:47 PM on July 17, 2009

Sometimes a Weinermobile jammed halfway through a splintered garage door is just a Weinermobile jammed halfway through a splintered garage door.
posted by PlusDistance at 8:58 PM on July 17, 2009 [1 favorite]

Back in 1990 or so, I was at a touristy spot in Texas somewhere and encountered the Wienermobile and its drivers. They were a married couple, in their late 20s or so, totally down to earth and interesting to talk to. They said they simply saw an ad for the job and applied. I think they were teachers, or at least they took the summer off their job. Oscar Meyer hired them to just drive around to places they saw fit to stop at and just chat with folks, hand out coupons and sometimes free wieners and such. And they got a boatload of money for three months' work.
posted by zardoz at 8:59 PM on July 17, 2009

This wiener, it vibrates?
posted by Balisong at 9:13 PM on July 17, 2009

In these dark times, I turn to the cookbook for solace. As Frankfurter 19:24 says, "It is easier for a wienermobile to go through the garage door of a house, than for a rich man to buy a hot dog."
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 9:16 PM on July 17, 2009 [1 favorite]

My pinkslip has a first name, it's F-I-R-E-D.
posted by BrotherCaine at 9:25 PM on July 17, 2009 [6 favorites]

"Son, when a weinermobile and a garage slash deck love each other very much... the weinermobile may get excited and accidentally put itself in drive rather than reverse but that's just how love works sometimes."
posted by mathowie at 9:25 PM on July 17, 2009 [3 favorites]

Wienermobile.

Heh heh.
posted by futureisunwritten at 9:27 PM on July 17, 2009

=
posted by contessa at 9:40 PM on July 17, 2009

jonp72, the story you linked to was previously MetaFiltered. (I did my homework)

But I still haven't found whether Oscar F. Mayer's middle name was Frank.
posted by wendell at 10:14 PM on July 17, 2009

The Oscar Meyer Wienermobile BLEW THE FUCKING DOORS OFF my school bus while I was riding home my sophomore year. The thing was like a wiener rocket, and was doing better than 80mph easy.

Shannon stood up in the aisle and screamed "Somewhere, somebody need a wiener!". I'm obligated to tell this story every time the Wienermobile is mentioned.
posted by spikeleemajortomdickandharryconnickjrmints at 10:39 PM on July 17, 2009 [4 favorites]

\......./
posted by sloe at 11:01 PM on July 17, 2009

But I still haven't found whether Oscar F. Mayer's middle name was Frank.

Alas, it was Ferdinand.
posted by dhartung at 11:22 PM on July 17, 2009

Like a hot dog down a hallway.
posted by FireballForever at 11:24 PM on July 17, 2009

Maybe the woman driving that thing just hadn't had enough training.
posted by pracowity at 12:25 AM on July 18, 2009

"When they learned that she needed to file a wienermobile-inflicted claim, she said they rejected her application."

That just needed to be said again...

So, I'm trying to picture this... the WM runs into her house, so she says "oh crap, I need insurance for this, and goes to the local insurance office and says, "sell me insurance, the WM just ran into my house and I want you to pay for it!"... Well, hell yes they said "NO!"...



BrotherCaine wins.
posted by HuronBob at 3:45 AM on July 18, 2009

big cocks
posted by Henry C. Mabuse at 4:04 AM on July 18, 2009

Mr. Arkham, a vegetarian, was deeply annoyed at the PETA protesters last time the Weinermobile was here in DC because "dammit, everyone loves the Weinermobile".
posted by JoanArkham at 6:49 AM on July 18, 2009 [1 favorite]

Metafilter: Somewhere, somebody needs a wiener.
posted by Strange Interlude at 7:07 AM on July 18, 2009

Like a 23-foot-long, curved battering ram, the fiberglass frankfurter had slammed into the house foundation, garage door and deck that overhangs the driveway.

Rest in peace, J. G. Ballard.
posted by Nelson at 7:20 AM on July 18, 2009 [2 favorites]

The driver of the weinermobile was momentarily distracted by the sight of a masturbating walrus. It happens.
posted by metagnathous at 7:31 AM on July 18, 2009

Now that's what I call throwing a hot dog down a hallway.

On preview: Nicely done, FireballForever.
posted by emelenjr at 8:06 AM on July 18, 2009

They are quite large, the Weinermobiles.
posted by Lucinda at 8:12 AM on July 18, 2009

Once, I was in my car, listening to the local afternoon traffic reporter guy. The Oscar Meyer Weiner-mobile had broken down on one of the major throughfares. This was the sort of thing, he said, that traffic reporters dream about.
posted by Clay201 at 9:04 AM on July 18, 2009