All of these could be included on a list of things that don't exist.
January 8, 2010 11:37 AM   Subscribe

A complete list of fictional restaurants. Though as with any "complete list" on the blue, I have complete faith that MeFites can think of some that were neglectfully omitted.
posted by grapefruitmoon (110 comments total) 6 users marked this as a favorite
 
Neat. I've been wanting to make a similar list of all the fake movies/plays in Seinfeld.
posted by Saxon Kane at 11:40 AM on January 8, 2010


Paradise from 'The Big Night' is missing.
posted by fixedgear at 11:42 AM on January 8, 2010


Two from "The Critic": L'Ane Riche and Duke Phillips's House of Chicken and Waffles.
posted by Sidhedevil at 11:43 AM on January 8, 2010


If a non-fictional restaurant is defined as a place which serves real food in the real world, I'd like to nominate T.G.I. Fridays, Applebee's, et. al. as fictional restaurants for violating the first part.
posted by griphus at 11:44 AM on January 8, 2010 [4 favorites]


Saxon Kane: Ta-daaah!
posted by ricochet biscuit at 11:45 AM on January 8, 2010


What? No Valabar's? No Cowboy Feng's?
posted by gurple at 11:45 AM on January 8, 2010 [3 favorites]


I went to the link all ready to bitch about how it didn't have Grizzlebee's but they did.

You'll wish you had less fun!
posted by graymouser at 11:47 AM on January 8, 2010 [1 favorite]


Burger Czar, where the burgers are!
posted by mr_crash_davis mark II: Jazz Odyssey at 11:48 AM on January 8, 2010


Neat. I've been wanting to make a similar list of all the fake movies/plays in Seinfeld.

Me too! I love the movie titles in Seinfeld. They are so astoundingly believable. "Prognosis: Negative."
posted by Miko at 11:50 AM on January 8, 2010 [1 favorite]


What an absurd claim. There's hardly any books in that list. I saw Honorverse novels, Snow Crash, and Vineland. That was like it. They didn't even have the Dixie Pig from Stephan King's Dark Tower series, and let me tell you kids, if you're failing to include Stephan Fucking King in your list of pop culture trivia, you're not really even trying.
posted by Caduceus at 11:51 AM on January 8, 2010 [1 favorite]


T.J. O'Pootertoot's from the Ben Stiller Show.
posted by chesty_a_arthur at 11:52 AM on January 8, 2010


The bronze from buffy - although I guess that was more of a 16+ music club/coffee shop/ fixed set piece type of thing.
posted by Think_Long at 11:52 AM on January 8, 2010


"The La Trattoria" from Micky Blue Eyes.

Gina Vitale: It's called The La Trattoria.
Michael Felgate: You mean La Trattoria.
Gina Vitale: No.
Michael Felgate: The La Trattoria means The The Trattoria.
Gina Vitale: I know.

posted by CaseyB at 11:54 AM on January 8, 2010


Yeah, pretty sure I could turn on tv right now and they wouldn't have even covered the show, let alone the different fictional eating houses on the show. But I admire their ambition.
posted by doublehappy at 11:57 AM on January 8, 2010


"Callahan's Place"
posted by CaseyB at 11:58 AM on January 8, 2010 [3 favorites]


I was going to have said 'came, saw Burzum's, left happy,' but then I remembered that there's also a Duncan Hills faux-Starbucks in the series, so I'll be grouchy with everyone else.
posted by Weighted Companion Cube at 12:01 PM on January 8, 2010


The Lunch Box from Roseanne.
posted by nestor_makhno at 12:08 PM on January 8, 2010


There are about three billion fictional restaurants in American Psycho (the book, at least), so it's odd that they only include Dorsia, especially considering *SPOILER* they never actually eat there.
posted by shakespeherian at 12:12 PM on January 8, 2010


The Lunch Box from Roseanne.

They have that one, listed as "The Lanford Lunch Box." They also have Rodbell's (the diner inside the department store).
posted by amyms at 12:15 PM on January 8, 2010


I was going to have said 'came, saw Burzum's, left happy,' but then I remembered that there's also a Duncan Hills faux-Starbucks in the series, so I'll be grouchy with everyone else.

They also missed 'Dimmu Burger'.
posted by spinifex23 at 12:15 PM on January 8, 2010


I was shocked they didn't have Alice's Restaurant, but maybe songs don't count?
posted by forforf at 12:17 PM on January 8, 2010 [1 favorite]


I didn't find any claims that the list is complete; in fact, the page explicitly states that "This list is incomplete; you can help by expanding it."
posted by dosterm at 12:17 PM on January 8, 2010


What about the restaurant on Seinfeld? Is it fictional (because it's never identified), or is it real (because the exterior shots are clearly identifiable, and the interior is sorta-kinda modeled on the real Tom's)? Or is it real and is Tom's fictional?
posted by mr vino at 12:17 PM on January 8, 2010


What about the restaurant on Seinfeld?

It's in there. Monk's.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 12:20 PM on January 8, 2010


From the list:

Professor P.J. Cornucopia's Fantastic Foodmagorium and Great American Steakery

Colour me impressed. They've got What They Eat in Iceland too.
posted by gompa at 12:22 PM on January 8, 2010


Wow, surprised they had Company from Guiding Light but not ...

The Pizza Bowl - Laverne & Shirley

and (good lord, the best of all!!!)

Casa Bonita - South Park
posted by mrgrimm at 12:22 PM on January 8, 2010


MacLaren's from How I Met Your Mother, might be classified as a bar, but they definitely serve food there, and it's not included.
posted by kingjoeshmoe at 12:22 PM on January 8, 2010


Leery's Fresh Fish from Dawson's Creek!

I feel ashamed that it's the first thing to pop into my head.
posted by something something at 12:24 PM on January 8, 2010


It's in there. Monk's.

Which is actually Tom's. But didn't "Monk's" become simply "Coffee Shop" eventually?
posted by mrgrimm at 12:25 PM on January 8, 2010


> No Cowboy Feng's?
> "Callahan's Place"

See companion article, List of fictional bars
posted by ardgedee at 12:25 PM on January 8, 2010


The Whistle Stop Cafe. You know, where the green tomatoes get fried.

Both a book and a movie, and still not on the list. Tsk tsk.
posted by CitizenD at 12:25 PM on January 8, 2010


what about Reggie's from the Bizzaro episode of Seinfeld?
posted by glenngulia at 12:28 PM on January 8, 2010


Also, I guess they the Simpsons restaurants by themselves could spawn a list this long, but they don't have one of my faves:

Wes Doobner's World Famous Family Rib Huts
posted by mrgrimm at 12:28 PM on January 8, 2010


oops. Reggie's is under Coffee Shops
posted by glenngulia at 12:28 PM on January 8, 2010


No "Sit-n-Rotate"? For shame!
posted by yellowbinder at 12:29 PM on January 8, 2010


From mrgrimm's Casa Bonita link:

it's like Disney had sex with Tijuana and left the goofy-looking bastard to fend for itself in a random strip mall on Colfax

Oh my. Thanks for that.

I lived in Denver for two years as a young kid, and as I got further away from that time I began to think I must've dreamed Casa Bonita. I'd be thinking to myself, I'm pretty sure I once watched a real-life demonstration of Polynesian-style pearl diving, but where the hell would I have ever seen such a thing? The answer, of course, is Casa Bonita. I believe their mid-80s radio jingle went: "It's a feast-ival / At Casa Bonita!"

Fucking Casa Bonita. Fucking preteen acid trip. Holy fuck.
posted by gompa at 12:31 PM on January 8, 2010


They got Skip Church's Bistro but they forgot Miss Temple's Chinese Restaurant.
posted by bondcliff at 12:33 PM on January 8, 2010


Oh, they've got it listed as Springfield Revolving Restaurant. Worst List Ever.

And mrgrimm, Casa Bonita is very real, right down to the cliff divers. I know!
posted by yellowbinder at 12:34 PM on January 8, 2010


First two restaurants that came to mind were:
Big Ass Biscuit from CB4 isn't there.
Sal's Famous Pizzeria from Do the Right Thing isn't there.

I'm sure there are more on this complete list.
posted by Chuffy at 12:35 PM on January 8, 2010


I was shocked they didn't have Alice's Restaurant, but maybe songs don't count?
Maybe because it wasn't fictional?
posted by Kirth Gerson at 12:35 PM on January 8, 2010


The list of Simpson's restaurants alone is more than that list. Simpsons crazies get on it!
posted by Lacking Subtlety at 12:35 PM on January 8, 2010


Heck, it's not even complete Seinfeld--they missed the Dream Cafe and Poppie's.

Ditto Weston's coffee shop from Gilmore Girls.
posted by dlugoczaj at 12:36 PM on January 8, 2010


D'oh, I see you knew that. Didn't click your link, guess I made an ass out of u and me.
posted by yellowbinder at 12:36 PM on January 8, 2010


I came here to say what bondcliff said.

Also, Alice's Restaurant was a true (more or less) story, and I think there are some real Dixie Pigs out there as well.

They missed "Tony Anthony's" from Sports Night, though.
posted by Navelgazer at 12:37 PM on January 8, 2010


What the fucking hell? They left out Fat Ammy's too!
posted by bondcliff at 12:37 PM on January 8, 2010


Seriously, though - how could anyone pretend to have a complete list? Every TV drama, every movie, and most novels have restaurants in them.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 12:38 PM on January 8, 2010


It has Elzar's Fine Cuisine. I give it two twists of the spice weasel.
posted by Babblesort at 12:38 PM on January 8, 2010


Archie and the gang's favorite hangout, the Chok'lit Shoppe, is not there. Poor Mr. Tate.
posted by BuddhaInABucket at 12:42 PM on January 8, 2010


Merlottes from True Blood is missing.
posted by blaneyphoto at 12:43 PM on January 8, 2010


Since the list include "International House of Toast", the omission of "House of Toast" is inexcusable.
Sadly, there seems to be no "Toast" online, but here is a bunch of links to Bob and Ray goodness at one of those lotsa-links-about-stuff sites (site has ads).
posted by hexatron at 12:44 PM on January 8, 2010


Miko: " I love the movie titles in Seinfeld. They are so astoundingly believable."

Indeed.
posted by Joe Beese at 12:45 PM on January 8, 2010


Oh, right--the Magic Pan (listed as a King of the Hill restaurant) was real. I remember eating in one of those in the 80s. I loved their food. (And it was a snooty restaurant with crepes in KotH, so I'm pretty sure it's the same thing and not a coincidence.)
posted by dlugoczaj at 12:47 PM on January 8, 2010


Missing: Dr. Tongue's 3-D House of Pancakes
posted by Joe Beese at 12:48 PM on January 8, 2010 [1 favorite]


No Bada Bing or Vesuvio's.
posted by jamaro at 12:51 PM on January 8, 2010


What about the Globochem subsidiary "Ding Dong Burger?" Or even The Burgundy Loaf?
posted by Mayor Curley at 12:52 PM on January 8, 2010


Hey, Casa Bonita actually exists. Cartman's description is entirely accurate.
posted by mochapickle at 12:55 PM on January 8, 2010


Also missing: Troff 'n' Brew from Season 3 Episode 18 of Saturday Night Live:

Live From New York, It's... Paul Shaffer!
Sketches include "Don Kirshner's Rock Concert," "Hey You!," "Wild & Crazy Guys," "Theodoric of York: Medieval Barber," "Dancing In The Dark," "King Tut," "Extramarital Foreplay," "Swan Lake" (film), "Troff 'n' Brew," "Nerds Science Fair," and "Next Week In Review."
Jake and Elwood Blues performed "Hey Bartender" and "I Don't Know."

I think it is safe to say that ... SNL has gotten worse since then. Also Steve Martin. Also me.
posted by hexatron at 12:59 PM on January 8, 2010


Heck, it's not even complete Seinfeld--they missed the Dream Cafe and Poppie's.
And what about the Soup Nazi's place? (Forget the name.)
posted by Hardcore Poser at 1:00 PM on January 8, 2010


Milliways is fictional? There's no Milliways - yet.
posted by Smedleyman at 1:02 PM on January 8, 2010 [2 favorites]


Missing: Dr. Tongue's 3-D House of Pancakes
Forget it, MattJoe. It's Polynesiantown.
posted by Hardcore Poser at 1:03 PM on January 8, 2010 [1 favorite]


Whatever the restaraunt in Dinner Rush was.
posted by hwestiii at 1:11 PM on January 8, 2010


I wonder if they left out Mystic Pizza because it exists?
posted by MiltonRandKalman at 1:12 PM on January 8, 2010


Stavro Mueller's Beta.
The Gentleman Loser.
posted by Foosnark at 1:17 PM on January 8, 2010


Hmm,

They forgot 'Lord Wellington's Flying Beef Trapeze' from the Brak Show.
posted by The Power Nap at 1:19 PM on January 8, 2010


Dr. Tongue's 3-D House of Pancakes was a movie, not a restaurant!

Would you like some...SYRUP?

But there were a lot of fake restaurants on SCTV. Didn't Bobby LaRue own one?
posted by Sidhedevil at 1:29 PM on January 8, 2010 [1 favorite]


All the Frasier restaurants. How could they forget all the boîtes but remember the coffee shop?

Orcini's
Le Cigare Volant
Les Frères Heureux

right off the top of my head.
posted by winna at 1:29 PM on January 8, 2010


Mendy's from Seinfeld.
posted by davebush at 1:29 PM on January 8, 2010


Mendys is real.
posted by blaneyphoto at 1:37 PM on January 8, 2010


Sidhedevil: "Dr. Tongue's 3-D House of Pancakes was a movie, not a restaurant!

Would you like some...SYRUP?
"

I believe that the movie's title derives from a restaurant it depicts - like Bagdad Café, which also appears to be missing. You would serve syrup in a restaurant, yes?

But there really isn't enough evidence to settle the question either way.

Coincidentally, this very morning, as Jones was clawing her scratching post, I encouraged her with shouts of "Rip and tear, Bruno! Rip and tear!"
posted by Joe Beese at 1:39 PM on January 8, 2010


"I believe that the movie's title derives from a restaurant it depicts..."

Dick: "She should have done it on 'The Number Four With A Smile'."
Barry: "Wasn't her record called 'Number Four With A Smile'?"
Dick: "That's what I said."
Barry: "No, no. You said 'The Number Four With A Smile'. There's no the at the front of the title of the album."
Dick: "It's in reference to a Chinese meal in Toronto so I think there is a the but I could be wrong."
Barry:"You can be - and are - wrong."
posted by mr_crash_davis mark II: Jazz Odyssey at 1:47 PM on January 8, 2010 [1 favorite]


Now that I think about it: if Avatar had a scene in the Marines' mess hall where someone extended a syrup dispenser towards the camera, it would have made up for a lot of the rest of it.
posted by Joe Beese at 1:49 PM on January 8, 2010 [1 favorite]


Don't forget Cheesybeards from The Guild.
posted by lholladay at 1:58 PM on January 8, 2010


Gravy Robbers from Tim & Eric Awesome Show, Great Job!
posted by look busy at 2:06 PM on January 8, 2010


I believe that the movie's title derives from a restaurant it depicts - like Bagdad Café, which also appears to be missing. You would serve syrup in a restaurant, yes?

Dude. You have blown my mind.

But I think Dr. Tongue's 3D House of Pancakes belongs on a list of metafictional restaurants, then--it's a fictional restaurant in a fictional movie.
posted by Sidhedevil at 2:23 PM on January 8, 2010 [1 favorite]


They appear to have missed several restaurants that were on Cheers:

Melville's (the seafood restaurant above Cheers)
the Hungry Heifer (Norm's favorite restaurant)
Gary's Old Town Tavern (Sam's rival bar)
posted by jonp72 at 2:28 PM on January 8, 2010


The La Trattoria means The The Trattoria

It's the favorite restaurant of The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim.
posted by kirkaracha at 2:43 PM on January 8, 2010


But I think Dr. Tongue's 3D House of Pancakes belongs on a list of metafictional restaurants, then--it's a fictional restaurant in a fictional movie.

Said fictional movie introduced by a fictional TV host (Count Floyd) on a fictional TV station. That resturant is pretty dang fictional.

At the risk of turning this into a SCTV derail, can someone help my memory - I seem to recall that Harry (the guy with the snake on his face) of Harry's Sex Shop wound up together with Edna of Tex and Edna Boyle's Organ Emporium at some point. Do I remember that right, or was my brain addled by all of the late night viewings of SCTV and the substances I had ingested?
posted by never used baby shoes at 3:20 PM on January 8, 2010 [1 favorite]


I was shocked they didn't have Alice's Restaurant, but maybe songs don't count?

Maybe because it wasn't fictional?


Exactly.
posted by ericb at 3:25 PM on January 8, 2010


Tex Boil left Edna, and she took up with some guy called Stan. Then Tex came back. Harry The Guy With The Snake On His Face wasn't in the picture.
posted by Sidhedevil at 3:29 PM on January 8, 2010 [1 favorite]


Arlo Guthire on the song -- NPR's All Things Considered (November 26, 2005).
posted by ericb at 3:33 PM on January 8, 2010


Thanks Sidhedevil! Damn my faulty memory!
posted by never used baby shoes at 3:33 PM on January 8, 2010


Happy Kyne's Bun 'n' Run - Fernwood 2 Night
posted by Danf at 3:41 PM on January 8, 2010 [1 favorite]


The New Delhi Deli--George of the Jungle (original Jay Ward version, of course )
posted by rdone at 3:47 PM on January 8, 2010


Er, am I the only one who noticed that this list never claimed to be complete? In fact, it sez:

This list is incomplete; you can help by expanding it.


I can see how you might miss it; it's right there at the top.
posted by chavenet at 3:48 PM on January 8, 2010



Er, am I the only one who noticed that this list never claimed to be complete?
posted by chavenet at 6:48 PM on January 8


Nope. dosterm pointed this out way back at the beginning of this thread.
posted by blaneyphoto at 4:12 PM on January 8, 2010


No Akbar & Jeff's Tofu Hut?
posted by Multicellular Exothermic at 4:33 PM on January 8, 2010


No "The Two Windmills" from Amelie
posted by Multicellular Exothermic at 4:42 PM on January 8, 2010


Club Obi Wan
posted by brundlefly at 4:47 PM on January 8, 2010


Season 4 and Fatty Fat's Sandwich Ranch from 30 Rock!
posted by casualinference at 4:56 PM on January 8, 2010


Happy Kyne's Bun 'n' Run - Fernwood 2 Night

You complete me.
posted by Sidhedevil at 5:03 PM on January 8, 2010


Daily Grind, from Spiderman. Bill's Diner, from Thor. They did get a few comic book places in there, though.
posted by Jimmy Havok at 7:32 PM on January 8, 2010


See companion article, List of fictional bars

You need a list of fictional hotels now.
posted by Avelwood at 8:34 PM on January 8, 2010


T.J. O'Pootertoots from the Ben Stiller show.
posted by dgaicun at 8:38 PM on January 8, 2010


You've got to be fucking kidding me.
posted by dgaicun at 8:40 PM on January 8, 2010


Here's some Simpsons places that appear to be missing:

Berger's Burgers
Call Me Delish-mael
Doughy's Pizza
Eatie Gourmet's
Java the Hut
John Bull's Fish & Chips
Kafe Kafka
Karachi Hibachi

Neat. I've been wanting to make a similar list of all the fake movies/plays in Seinfeld.

Deleted from Wikipedia.
posted by dgaicun at 9:39 PM on January 8, 2010


95 comments and nobody's mentioned The Restaurant at the End of the Universe.

For shame, Metafilter.
posted by jimmythefish at 9:53 PM on January 8, 2010


Ah crap...they prededed it with Milliways. Never mind!
posted by jimmythefish at 9:54 PM on January 8, 2010


Cup o' Pizza (The Jerk).

Phineas Q. Butterfat's 5600 Flavors Ice Cream Parlor (Simpsons again).
posted by dgaicun at 9:55 PM on January 8, 2010


"The La Trattoria means The The Trattoria"

It's the favorite restaurant of The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim.


I often stop there after visiting the La Brea Tar Pits. They only take cash, so stop at an ATM machine (if you remember your PIN number).
posted by dogwelder at 10:15 PM on January 8, 2010


There was also Rat In The Box ("We Fry What You Won't Touch") from one of the Firesign Theatre's early 80s videos, The Case of the Missing Yolks.
posted by Spatch at 3:27 AM on January 9, 2010


It makes me sad that so few people give a shit about history, even history of such a short time ago as the first half of the Twentieth Century. 90% of the time when I see a list of "Best X Movies" or whatever, it's all stuff made in the last few years. And whoever makes the list doesn't even bother to say, "By 'best' I mean best in the last two decades." He just acts as if the world started in 1980.

Where's Rick's Café Américain from "Casablanca"?

I feel like I should give ten more examples, but I have a bad memory for stuff like that. I do know that there are LOTS of older movies, going back to the silents, in which people go to restaurants and bars, and that in many of those moves, those places have names. Were I bold enough to post such a list on my website, I'd go back and check some older movies.
posted by grumblebee at 6:42 AM on January 9, 2010


Like Martini's/Nick's in It's a Wonderful Life? Yes, there are a lot which it would be fun to pay attention to. The Kit Kat Klub is in some movie that I can't remember right now. Also in radio shows and 50s sitcoms. You make a good point, Grumblebee.
posted by Miko at 9:01 AM on January 9, 2010


Kit Kat Klub is from "Cabaret."
posted by grumblebee at 9:28 AM on January 9, 2010


"This song is called Alice's Restaurant, and it's about Alice, and the restaurant, but Alice's Restaurant is not the name of the restaurant, that's just the name of the song, and that's why I called the song Alice's Restaurant."
posted by juliplease at 9:28 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]


Actually, in the mid to late 70s there was an 'Alice's Restaurant' in Lenox across the way from the Tanglewood Music Shed and Lawn. My parents would take us there for dinner before concerts in the summer.
posted by ericb at 10:17 AM on January 9, 2010


The actual restaurant was called "The Back Room Rest." Somewhere I have a photo of me standing in the doorway, where a painted sign informs visitors of this fact. There's another restaurant there now. It's in Stockbridge.
posted by Miko at 3:08 PM on January 9, 2010


Deleted from Wikipedia.

This whole FPP is just a wikipedia article that was deleted back in 2007 and is only showing up on one of those questionable sites that republish wikipedia content because they're using an old version of the wikipedia dump.
posted by Rhomboid at 4:40 PM on January 9, 2010


Where's Rick's Café Américain from "Casablanca"?

It's on the list.


Kit Kat Klub is from "Cabaret."

After the 18th Century one?
posted by Kirth Gerson at 4:27 AM on January 10, 2010


There's another restaurant there now.

It's Theresa's Stockbridge Cafe.

The one in Lenox (called Alice's at Avaloch) was owned and operated by Alice Brock and closed in 1979. It was an upscale restaurant (what my family would call a "three fork" restaurant).
posted by ericb at 5:23 AM on January 10, 2010


Beanbender's Beer Garden from the incomparable The Snarkout Boys and the Avocado of Death, by Daniel Pinkwater.
posted by Multicellular Exothermic at 8:45 AM on January 13, 2010


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