Hello, monkey. Goodbye, monkey
August 12, 2010 11:00 AM   Subscribe

New "cat-sized" monkey discovered! The Callicebus caquetensis (a type of titi monkey) was just discovered, pre-endangered for your convenience.
posted by mikoroshi (39 comments total) 4 users marked this as a favorite
 
Could it be that the violence and insurgent activities in that area served to protect these little critters from further habitat loss?
posted by Danf at 11:04 AM on August 12, 2010


Looks delicious. Your link doesn't list any cooking tips. Times. Wine pairings etc. Any suggestions?
posted by Keith Talent at 11:06 AM on August 12, 2010 [3 favorites]


I wonder if it will bite your face off when provoked?
posted by Shike at 11:07 AM on August 12, 2010


Aren't lots of monkeys cat-sized?
posted by swift at 11:07 AM on August 12, 2010 [3 favorites]


That photo from the last link is going to make Farkers veeeeerrrry happy. Oh, the possibilities!
posted by Gator at 11:09 AM on August 12, 2010


Hey that is a dope-ass monkey.
posted by Mister_A at 11:14 AM on August 12, 2010 [1 favorite]


Yes, how does it taste? Alternatively, can we wear it?
posted by blue_beetle at 11:15 AM on August 12, 2010


Are we sure it's not a cat? They can be fiendishly clever. I once caught a cat dressed as a cat-sized osprey.
posted by Astro Zombie at 11:15 AM on August 12, 2010 [2 favorites]


Mr. Beast claims that the expedition was called "The Itty-Bitty Titi Committee".

Also, aww look at its little face!
posted by bewilderbeast at 11:16 AM on August 12, 2010 [2 favorites]


Someone should write a song about this monkey.
posted by Mister_A at 11:17 AM on August 12, 2010


Are we sure it's not a cat? They can be fiendishly clever.

"Fiendishly clever" doesn't sound like you've been dealing with cats. Maybe they are cat-sized monkeys dressed as cats. Dressed as ospreys.
posted by DU at 11:17 AM on August 12, 2010 [3 favorites]


Dear God. We're through the looking glass.
posted by Astro Zombie at 11:18 AM on August 12, 2010


Looks delicious. Your link doesn't list any cooking tips. Times. Wine pairings etc. Any suggestions?

It pairs well with Bald Eagle.

I heard.
posted by jquinby at 11:19 AM on August 12, 2010


Someone should write a song about this monkey.

I've had complaints about my ditties;
Complaints that they are adult fare.
I was going to sing about some titis,
But then I saw a soldier bear.
posted by Astro Zombie at 11:19 AM on August 12, 2010


I've had complaints about my ditties;
Complaints that they are adult fare.
I was going to sing about some titis,
But then I saw a soldier bear.


<gaga>
MA-MA-MA-MA-MONKEY! MA-MA, MA-MA MONKEY!
</gaga>
posted by jquinby at 11:22 AM on August 12, 2010 [3 favorites]


It pairs well with Bald Eagle.

Yeah, but that's more of a physical thing. Out of the nest it's like they travel in different habitats.
posted by CynicalKnight at 11:23 AM on August 12, 2010


I don't understand the discovered part.

Titis are fairly common and well known! We have them in every museum in Peru.

Also, yeah, there's a soup in the Amazon. Not so good.
Specially if you picture little titi hands floating in it.

:(
posted by Tarumba at 11:27 AM on August 12, 2010


Psssst. Bald eagles aren't endangered anymore. Grill, baby, grill.
posted by Gator at 11:28 AM on August 12, 2010


Oh I see it's a new red bearded kind of titi. OK.

Still, don't try the soup!
posted by Tarumba at 11:29 AM on August 12, 2010 [1 favorite]


Sample Questions for New Species:

1) How delicate are you with regards to the odd pollutant, stray hormone, and occasional release of chemicals?
2) Can you be made into medicines in, say, under, say, a ten year span for R&D?
3) How rapidly do you feel like being domesticated? Be aware, we do already have several species in the "pet" category.
4) How adorable are you?
5) Does your current habitat border any area in which humans have build any structures recently?
6) Are you, in fact, delicious?
7) Is your fur, hide, skin, or other integument of decorative value?
8) Do you have any features which suggest virility, fungible to the extent that they could be ground up into powder?
9) How do you feel about captivity? Consider nutritional requirements, irritability, entertainment value, and breeding.

Please answer these questions carefully, as they will determine the size of your gene pool, if any, within the next twenty years.
posted by adipocere at 11:32 AM on August 12, 2010 [4 favorites]




"When world leaders meet later this year in Japan for the Convention on Biological Diversity, they must commit to the creation of many more protected areas if we want to ensure the survival of threatened creatures like this in the Amazon and around the world."

GOOD LUCK!
posted by mrgrimm at 11:42 AM on August 12, 2010


Titi monkey, my ass!
posted by MrMoonPie at 11:44 AM on August 12, 2010 [1 favorite]


So it's an itty bitty...

aww. =\
posted by Eideteker at 11:56 AM on August 12, 2010


Pardon the slight rail-bending, but:

"Fiendishly clever" doesn't sound like you've been dealing with cats.

Huh? Do you have dull cats? If you think so, my guess is they're just acting dull in some nefarious long-term plan to eat you.

Fiendishly clever, indeed.
posted by kingbenny at 12:25 PM on August 12, 2010


Although the creature resembles a large kitten, as a member of the Ateles genus, it is more closely related to wooly and spider monkeys. Ateles saporis, informally known as the delicacy ape, is a tree-dwelling herbivore that can measure up to a meter from head to tail. The adult delicacy ape weighs between 35 and 40 pounds and tastes wonderful with a currant glaze. via
posted by blue_beetle at 12:35 PM on August 12, 2010


Looks delicious. Your link doesn't list any cooking tips. Times. Wine pairings etc. Any suggestions?

As with most game dishes, a nice earthy pinot noir pairs well, but if you're going to prepare your titi in a more traditionally Brazilian churrasco style, a more robust grenacha or syrah may be called for.
posted by Panjandrum at 12:45 PM on August 12, 2010


I'm a titi monkey.
Seriously, though, I always find it amazing when (fairly) large animals are newly documented (I refuse to use discovered as I am sure the local human population is aware of them).
posted by mrgroweler at 12:46 PM on August 12, 2010


I can't believe all these juvenile titi jokes...

got in before I could post one.
posted by Serene Empress Dork at 12:57 PM on August 12, 2010


Its long tail is stippled with grey, and it has a bushy red beard around its cheeks...

No! I don't need any other animals living in my house! I don't care how endangered you are, you have to go somewhere else, and don't try using your cute powers on me, it won't work!

and pairs are often seen sitting on a branch with their tails entwined.

DAMNIT!

*holds open door*

Fine, just try not to make too much of a mess...
posted by quin at 12:59 PM on August 12, 2010 [1 favorite]


I will now refer to my cat as "monkey-sized".
posted by cazoo at 1:09 PM on August 12, 2010 [1 favorite]


Keith Talent: "Looks delicious. Your link doesn't list any cooking tips. Times. Wine pairings etc. Any suggestions?"

I would suggest serving them chilled.
posted by brundlefly at 2:09 PM on August 12, 2010


Cats are monkeys, BTW.
posted by Mister_A at 2:21 PM on August 12, 2010


"Mouse-sized" Monkey footnote
posted by xod at 2:24 PM on August 12, 2010


It's a running joke in my lab that all monkeys--no matter the size--are described as some variation of "cat-sized." Baboons for instance are "very large cat-sized," while mouse lemurs are the size of a smallish cat.

As to the proposed new species, Callicebus caquetensis, here are some more images in which you can see the coat color, and here's a recording of it's call.
posted by bergeycm at 4:23 PM on August 12, 2010


Oh, oops. Make that all primates. Mouse lemurs aren't monkeys. I should know better than to make that mistake.
posted by bergeycm at 4:38 PM on August 12, 2010


Does it continually piss on my dirty laundry, toddler's rocking chair, and scratch up my furniture?

If not, I'LL TAKE ONE.

F'in cat-sized Siamese is a pain in the ass.
posted by stormpooper at 9:42 AM on August 13, 2010


"and pairs are often seen sitting on a branch with their tails entwined."

My husband and I saw this when we went to Zoolights and all the animals were sleeping. They sleep, side by side with their tails twisted together. It was the most adorable and weirdly romantic thing I've ever seen. Supposedly titi monkeys are so into their titi monkey "spouses" they often neglect their children.
posted by Jess the Mess at 4:45 PM on August 13, 2010




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