Who you are is not what you did...
September 14, 2010 8:04 AM   Subscribe

 
Glorious!
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 8:07 AM on September 14, 2010


...is there a DSM entry for what is wrong with Taylor Swift?
posted by The Whelk at 8:09 AM on September 14, 2010 [12 favorites]


Sometimes I wish Metafilter were a bit less like The Huffington Post.
posted by inoculatedcities at 8:09 AM on September 14, 2010 [16 favorites]


Oh Jesus Christ. Someone give these two another million bucks, they deserve it.
posted by Stagger Lee at 8:10 AM on September 14, 2010 [2 favorites]


All I know about Taylor Swift is that somebody (maybe on Metafilter) once pointed out she plays Taylor guitars and was dating Taylor Lautner. And that's just a lot of Tayloring.
posted by kmz at 8:11 AM on September 14, 2010 [2 favorites]


Sometimes I wish Metafilter were a bit less like The Huffington Post.

You must be the post you wish to see in the world.

-- MeFi Gandhi
posted by hermitosis at 8:12 AM on September 14, 2010 [63 favorites]


Hermitosis, I bet things were easier for you back when you were [NOT HERMITOSIS-IST]. But I want you to know that you still shine bright to me, even after this post.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 8:13 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


Congrats to NPR for having the courage to get this important story out there. The so-called "Major News Sources" are afraid to touch it.

The next time NPR asks you for money, remember that they'll use it to serve up "news" that belongs in Us Weekly.
posted by Mayor Curley at 8:15 AM on September 14, 2010 [14 favorites]


But Public Television is another matter entirely and you should all get out your checkbooks now before you stop to think about it.
posted by Mayor Curley at 8:15 AM on September 14, 2010 [6 favorites]


hermitosis: You must be the post you wish to see in the world.

Blink-tagged for truth.
posted by Aizkolari at 8:16 AM on September 14, 2010


Be careful when you fight the monsters, Taylor, lest you become one.
posted by 2bucksplus at 8:18 AM on September 14, 2010 [5 favorites]


she really meant it when she lip-synced that song on stage, while playing an unmic'ed resonator guitar.
posted by Mach5 at 8:19 AM on September 14, 2010 [5 favorites]


If Lady Gaga can't get to be the subject of a VMA post by wearing a meat dress, what is it going to take?

WHAT IS IT GOING TO TAKE?
posted by Joe Beese at 8:19 AM on September 14, 2010 [4 favorites]


somewhere mccarthy.tim is crying.
posted by The Whelk at 8:20 AM on September 14, 2010


The next time NPR asks you for money, remember that they'll use it to serve up "news" that belongs in Us Weekly.

Yeah, how dare they waste precious internet space on a blog post????
posted by muddgirl at 8:24 AM on September 14, 2010


Is there a magazine or place I can go to keep up on the doings of the stars of the entertainment world?
posted by pianomover at 8:24 AM on September 14, 2010 [6 favorites]


Dude, we get that y'all don't care about "celebrities". Feel free to move on without commenting.
posted by muddgirl at 8:25 AM on September 14, 2010 [2 favorites]


All I know about Taylor Swift is that somebody (maybe on Metafilter) once pointed out she plays Taylor guitars and was dating Taylor Lautner. And that's just a lot of Tayloring.

If my name was Taylor, I'd definitely get a Taylor guitar. It's like "Hey...look...they made a guitar with my name on it."

As for dating a Taylor...the heart wants, and all.
posted by morganannie at 8:25 AM on September 14, 2010


...is there a DSM entry for what is wrong with Taylor Swift?

That'll be Linda's next column. Yes, I know she's a member here.
posted by Gator at 8:28 AM on September 14, 2010


Hey, they made a pop star with my name on it!
posted by swift at 8:29 AM on September 14, 2010 [6 favorites]


She had an awkward moment a year ago. She acted like this was all emotional and then you get this really milquetoast and opaque pop song. And it was built up like watch out, a very special song goes out to the terrifying monster Kanye West. Ut Oh fell off a tight rope!Oh no she didn't!
posted by I Foody at 8:30 AM on September 14, 2010


Wow, snarkfest supreme. No offense, NPR, but it was slightly more than "interrupting her", what Kanye did last year. That aside, I wasn't really paying attention to the song when it was on the VMAs, but it sounded nice and inoffensive enough, the bits I was listening to. I didn't even realize it was about Kanye though
posted by antifuse at 8:32 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


INT. BEYONCE'S HOUSE

BEYONCE IS WATCHING THE VMA CEREMONY WITH JAY-Z, A BOWL OF POPCORN BETWEEN THEM. TAYLOR SWIFT SINGS ABOUT KANYE INTERRUPTING HER AT LAST YEAR'S VMA CEREMONY

JAY-Z
Damn. That's... damn.

JAY-Z TURNS TO BEYONCE, A CONCERNED LOOK ON HIS FACE. BEYONCE GETS UP FROM THE COUCH, WALKS TO BATHROOM, AND LOCKS THE DOOR BEHIND HER. SHE TURNS THE SHOWER ON AND STEPS IN, STILL WEARING HER CLOTHES. JAY-Z FOLLOWS, KNOCKS GENTLY ON THE DOOR.

JAY-Z
Honey? You okay in there?

AN HOUR PASSES, IN WHICH BEYONCE STANDS UNDER THE WATER, HEAD RESTING AGAINST THE SIDE OF THE SHOWER.

JAY-Z IS SITTING NEAR THE BATHROOM, QUIETLY EATING A BOWL OF SHREDDED WHEAT, WAITING FOR HER TO OME OUT SO HE CAN BE SUPPORTIVE IN SOME WAY.

posted by Greg Nog at 8:33 AM on September 14, 2010 [43 favorites]


WHAT IS IT GOING TO TAKE?

The Camille Paglia takedown would be a good start. Hint hint hint!
posted by blucevalo at 8:33 AM on September 14, 2010


Wow, snarkfest supreme.

Metafilter always comes through with flying colors in that regard.
posted by blucevalo at 8:34 AM on September 14, 2010


I'm assuming that they still share the same management agency guy, and that the grand charade continues?

Enh.
posted by Capt. Renault at 8:36 AM on September 14, 2010 [5 favorites]


NPR makes a good point though, if a grim and unsettling one, that "Lets have a toast to the douchebags!" is probably not going away in our lifetimes.
posted by rusty at 8:40 AM on September 14, 2010


Yeah, how dare they waste precious internet space on a blog post????

They're one of the last credible media outlets in the entire country. They should avoid entertainment news entirely-- except long-form interviews where you can hear Terry Gross barely restraining herself from giving the celebrity an R-rated kiss. (Because it's funny)
posted by Mayor Curley at 8:41 AM on September 14, 2010 [4 favorites]


This music is bland and uninteresting, and since Kanye has profusely apologized, I would also say the condescension here is in bad taste (30 somethings really don't need teenagers to tell them they are "still growing up").

Now if only Taylor Swift somehow pisses off Eminem, then we'll see if she can truly dish it out.
posted by dgaicun at 8:42 AM on September 14, 2010 [5 favorites]


Kanye is an asshole and all, and I kind of don't mind. I don't want to like him but I think I do. Taylor Swift is annoying and boring and I don't like her. I don't know why. That stupid video about being a princess or wearing glasses or whatever the fuck didn't help.
posted by mokeydraws at 8:43 AM on September 14, 2010 [7 favorites]


And we all know the truth. Last year back stage those two were doing the nasty. Opposites attract.
posted by stormpooper at 8:43 AM on September 14, 2010


she really meant it when she lip-synced that song on stage

seems to me they'd have put up a track that was in tune for her to lip synch to

and there is no greater insult in the world to a rapper than the suggestion that he is an innocent - that had to have stung
posted by pyramid termite at 8:43 AM on September 14, 2010


Kanye is an asshole and all, and I kind of don't mind. I don't want to like him but I think I do. Taylor Swift is annoying and boring and I don't like her. I don't know why. That stupid video about being a princess or wearing glasses or whatever the fuck didn't help.

Totally! I call it the Kanye West syndrome- you can be the biggest asshole in the world, as far as I'm concerned, if you're always right. He was right about George Bush, he was right about Taylor Swift, and he's right about himself! Who can argue with that?
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 8:44 AM on September 14, 2010 [24 favorites]


30 somethings really don't need teenagers to tell them they are "still growing up"

Not all 30 somethings are created equal.
posted by morganannie at 8:44 AM on September 14, 2010


Imma let you finish but...eh...fuck it.
posted by josher71 at 8:44 AM on September 14, 2010


Why, of all threads, is this Taylor Swift thread such a powder keg?
posted by TrialByMedia at 8:46 AM on September 14, 2010


I can understand why this would be a bigger deal to her than it is to the rest of us, but damn, she needs that Sassy Gay Friend guy's help. Instead of singing a saccharine overly-dramatic song about it on the VMAs she should have played the thing with some levity (maybe a duet with Kayne) and come out of the whole thing looking like gold.
posted by Solon and Thanks at 8:46 AM on September 14, 2010 [3 favorites]


Seems like every other day that All Things Considered reads listener emails complaining about how NPR is covering far too much celebrity gossip ... or the private lives of politicians ... or some artistic genre that isn't "real" music/cinema/theatre ...

All of these have a very condescending tone and close with something along the lines of, "And here I thought NPR was better than this!" or "You should leave the trash to television talk shows and gossip rags!" (You can practically hear the unspoken indignity, like a whispered, "And I say to you Good Day, Sir!" [door slam])

These comments are a lot like that. And just as lame.
posted by grabbingsand at 8:47 AM on September 14, 2010 [2 favorites]


[NPR is] one of the last credible media outlets in the entire country.

At the risk of further derailing an appreciation of Taylor Swift's new music, I have to say that is very much a matter of opinion.
posted by Joe Beese at 8:48 AM on September 14, 2010 [2 favorites]


you have inspired me Hermitosis.
posted by The Whelk at 8:48 AM on September 14, 2010


I'm in the "who the hell cares" camp about celebrity drama, and in the "WTF NPR?" camp about future donations.
posted by HuronBob at 8:49 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


Imma let you finish but...eh...fuck it.

Pretty sure I said this at the same time last year, but please never let this meme die. I don't know why, but I am very fond of it.
posted by Think_Long at 8:49 AM on September 14, 2010 [2 favorites]


she should have played the thing with some levity (maybe a duet with Kayne) and come out of the whole thing looking like gold.

Actually, I think the NPR blogger and a vast swath of the celebrity media is really missing how big of a "Fuck You" this is to Kanye. He actually wrote a song that he wanted her to perform at the VMAs. She did this extremely condescending song instead. To me, she's not actually forgiving him - she's saying, "You don't get to define the terms of my forgiveness."
posted by muddgirl at 8:49 AM on September 14, 2010 [3 favorites]


in the "WTF NPR?" camp about future donations.

Wow, you're going to screw over your local NPR affiliate because of a blogger? I really don't get this sentiment at.all.
posted by muddgirl at 8:50 AM on September 14, 2010 [3 favorites]


[Dear lovely people - stop calling each other assholes. Thank you.]
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 8:51 AM on September 14, 2010 [11 favorites]


The Camille Paglia takedown would be a good start. Hint hint hint!

Oh please, Pagila just upset that she can't spend her nights in the bushes outside Madonna's house anymore.
posted by The Whelk at 8:52 AM on September 14, 2010 [5 favorites]


Good god, I'm reading this AFTER it got modded? <3
posted by cavalier at 8:56 AM on September 14, 2010 [3 favorites]


The "incident" last year was manufactured. This year's "emotional reaction" to the incident was even more manufactured. Media folks stirring up fake drama. I enjoy Kanye's music and personality, and I'm not anti-celebrity, but you people really give a shit about this thing? It's the 2k9-2k10 version of Janet Jackson's wardrobe malfunction.
posted by naju at 8:57 AM on September 14, 2010 [2 favorites]


Wow, you're going to screw over your local NPR affiliate because of a blogger? I really don't get this sentiment at.all.

I left for the torture. I stayed away for the celebrity gossip.
posted by DU at 8:57 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


The "incident" last year was manufactured.

Do you have any proof?
posted by morganannie at 8:58 AM on September 14, 2010


Wow. I'm not sure I've ever listened to Taylor Swift before (I always get her confused with the Gossip Girl chick.)

She does not have a very good voice at all. Why is she so popular?
posted by mrgrimm at 9:00 AM on September 14, 2010


The pinnacle of the Kanye meme.
posted by josher71 at 9:00 AM on September 14, 2010 [2 favorites]


I love how the NPR piece assigns such deep psychological motivations to both Swift and Kanye as if they actually had a hand in creating this charade, and weren't just vessels through which their marketing people make all of this happen.
posted by rocket88 at 9:01 AM on September 14, 2010


At least now Kanye can sleep at night, knowing that he has Taylor's forgiveness.
posted by tyllwin at 9:02 AM on September 14, 2010


Wow, you're going to screw over your local NPR affiliate because of a blogger? I really don't get this sentiment at.all.

NPR is not "screwed over" by not receiving my money any more than Gore was by not receiving my vote. In neither case were they ever entitled to them.

If anything "screwed" them out of those prized commodities, it was their own cushiness with a Washington power structure that I find offensive. Google "NPR ombudsman torture" to learn more!
posted by Joe Beese at 9:05 AM on September 14, 2010


Do you have any proof?

You got me there. I take back everything I said. Really though, the incident and especially Swift's reaction appeared 100% acted. Maybe someone who studies acting for a living can weigh in on that? And even if the original incident was for real, you honestly think either Swift or Kanye care one bit about each other's feelings one year later?

I remember watching MTV (a long time ago) and they had this special that was something like "Shocking! Moments! at the VMAs!" The marketing team at MTV are well aware that they need to drum up "shocking" moments every year at this event in order to keep people interested.
posted by naju at 9:06 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


Never Forget.
posted by sciurus at 9:06 AM on September 14, 2010 [2 favorites]


Metafilter: stop calling each other assholes.
posted by ericb at 9:06 AM on September 14, 2010


kanye, is that you?
posted by pyramid termite at 9:10 AM on September 14, 2010


NPR is not "screwed over" by not receiving my money any more than Gore was by not receiving my vote. In neither case were they ever entitled to them.

If anything "screwed" them out of those prized commodities, it was their own cushiness with a Washington power structure that I find offensive. Google "NPR ombudsman torture" to learn more!


I don't actually give a shit whether or not someone donates to NPR.

I DO respond negatively when folks claim that the entire NPR structure should be held "accountable" for a blog that they don't like:
Linda Holmes writes and edits NPR's entertainment and pop-culture blog, Monkey See. She has several elaborate theories involving pop culture and monkeys, all of which are available on request.
Why is an entertainment and pop-culture blog inappropriate material to be hosted on an NPR server?
posted by muddgirl at 9:11 AM on September 14, 2010


Hey Metafilter, IMMA LET YOU FINISH, but Reddit is the best website OF ALL TIME.
posted by Threeway Handshake at 9:11 AM on September 14, 2010


The marketing team at MTV are well aware that they need to drum up "shocking" moments every year at this event in order to keep people interested.

So I guess this year was a failure, then? Too bad. I was hoping for something sensational.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 9:11 AM on September 14, 2010


...seems to me they'd have put up a track that was in tune for her to lip synch to

In related news: Justin Bieber faked VMA performance, lip synced 'Baby' after rehearsal disaster (w/ video).
posted by ericb at 9:11 AM on September 14, 2010


you honestly think either Swift or Kanye care one bit about each other's feelings one year later

No, not really.

But I did have genuine sympathy for Taylor Swift last year when the event happened. She was pretty young and that probably was a pretty big deal for her to win that award.
posted by morganannie at 9:12 AM on September 14, 2010


There was a brief moment when the possibility flickered that this was the cleverest scam of all time — wouldn't it have been great if it turned out you could mash up Swift's hopelessly earnest song of forgiveness and Kanye's hopelessly earnest song of self-flagellation

See, that would have been legitimately clever. Particularly if they, themselves, never referenced the fact and just let people figure it out (or not) on their own.
posted by quin at 9:13 AM on September 14, 2010


Do you have any proof?

Do you have any proof it wasn't?
posted by blucevalo at 9:14 AM on September 14, 2010


But I did have genuine sympathy for Taylor Swift last year when the event happened. She was pretty young and that probably was a pretty big deal for her to win that award.

Hadn't she already won several Grammys at that point? Wouldn't an MTV Video award (video, not even the music) really be that big of a deal? I mean, I suppose an award's an award, but after a Grammy? I would have to look at the timeline to be sure.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 9:14 AM on September 14, 2010


Also, You Belong With Me is a great pop song.
posted by muddgirl at 9:14 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


Do you have any proof it wasn't?

Sigh.
posted by josher71 at 9:16 AM on September 14, 2010


I'm in the "who the hell cares" camp about celebrity drama, and in the "WTF NPR?" camp about future donations

I went to Camp Runamucka. They had bonfires and pony rides.
posted by octobersurprise at 9:17 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


mrgrimm: It's a total mystery. Usually people babble about "what a good songwriter" she is, but there are lots of songwriters that don't sing their own stuff, for good reason.

She seems like a very nice person in interviews, and comes off as down-to-earth and quite funny sometimes.

But I believe her to be actually, literally, tone-deaf. Her singing is embarrassing. Her live performances are usually train wrecks, but yet almost no one mentions it. But I'm sure sleeping on giant piles of money makes her feel much better about things.

She's a 6 foot tall skinny blonde attractive young woman who can hold a guitar properly. Change any one of those and you likely would have never heard of her before.

I like her, and want her to be successful, but I want her to quit screeching at me. I keep wanting her to make the jump to movies, where her assets are more applicable, and that's where the real money is anyway.
posted by discountfortunecookie at 9:17 AM on September 14, 2010 [14 favorites]


Do you have any proof it wasn't?

It's not a court of law or anything but I don't think the burden of proof lies on my shoulders.

And I'll just say...I'm not a Taylor Swift fan. I actually prefer Kanye's musical style to hers. However, I felt bad for her because what he did was really douche-y.

I don't believe it was a charade. She looked confused, bewildered, even devastated.
posted by morganannie at 9:18 AM on September 14, 2010


but there are lots of songwriters that don't sing their own stuff, for good reason.

There are plenty of crappy singer-songwriters that DO sing their own stuff. Especially male pop singers...
posted by muddgirl at 9:19 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


She should totally take on Emminem next, and then when he gets all nasty, reveal a secret alliance with the Insane Clown Posse and Kid Rock, and then Kanye can be all, "I'mma gonna stab you in the back" and team up with Emminem and Dre, and then there's a pay-per-view event where they all work it out in a steel cage full of folding chairs.
posted by Slap*Happy at 9:19 AM on September 14, 2010 [3 favorites]


Totally! I call it the Kanye West syndrome- you can be the biggest asshole in the world, as far as I'm concerned, if you're always right. He was right about George Bush, he was right about Taylor Swift, and he's right about himself! Who can argue with that?

Time to start printing Kanye Waz Right T-shirts.
posted by 2bucksplus at 9:20 AM on September 14, 2010


johnny cash didn't sing in tune either - discuss
posted by pyramid termite at 9:20 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


If my name was Taylor, I'd definitely get a Taylor guitar. It's like "Hey...look...they made a guitar with my name on it."

I don't know about that. I think it's pretty cool that brilliant British jazz guitarist Martin Taylor does not play a Martin or a Taylor.

(And if you're tired of the vapid pop music stylings of everyone involved in the VMAs, I strongly suggest that you click the link and enjoy Martin Taylor playing some really amazing music.)
posted by The World Famous at 9:20 AM on September 14, 2010


Do you have any proof?

Do you have any proof it wasn't?


"I know you are, but what am I?"
posted by ericb at 9:21 AM on September 14, 2010


johnny cash didn't sing in tune either - discuss

Yes he did, and his guitar was plugged in.
posted by Threeway Handshake at 9:21 AM on September 14, 2010 [11 favorites]


I have proof. Taylor called me that night, crying. "Astro Zombie," she told me, "you're the only one in the world I can talk to about Kanye, because you're the only one who knows my true feelings for him, and I know you'll never tell."

She was right. I did know, and I will never tell.

I invited her over. We shampooed our hair, played Mystery Date, and then danced our feelings out. Just danced them out.
posted by Astro Zombie at 9:22 AM on September 14, 2010 [17 favorites]


Wouldn't an MTV Video award (video, not even the music) really be that big of a deal?

I'm not a famous 19 year old so I don't know if I can answer that but my gut says yes. She was in front of tons of amazing artists and cameras and I can't imagine that when he stole the mic she thought to herself "Oh, this is no big deal. I mean, after all I already have a grammy."
posted by morganannie at 9:23 AM on September 14, 2010


Do you have any proof?

After the whole kerfuffle last year, it came out on the ONTD section of LJ (I know, I know...) that Kanye and Taylor had the exact same management guy. Screencap of the IMDB Pro contact information (which is why that post was promptly deleted there). And no, my google-fu can't find any reference to it elsewhere now. And no, a common manager -- not just the agency, but the same frikkin' guy -- isn't proof of a charade, but those kinds of coincidences usually aren't coincidental.

Of course, I stand to be corrected on any of this, but it was certainly enough in my mind to come to the conclusion it was all one big stunt.

posted by Capt. Renault at 9:24 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


Wouldn't an MTV Video award (video, not even the music) really be that big of a deal?

Whenever I start to envy celebrities for their wealth, I remind myself how frequently they have to dress up, smile at photographers, and otherwise pretend to give a shit about unprestigious award ceremonies.
posted by Joe Beese at 9:25 AM on September 14, 2010


You might expect me to say / something about kanye / and how he ran up on the stage / and ruined my my VMA monologue....
posted by wayland at 9:28 AM on September 14, 2010


the biggest surprise here is that i rather like this song--its got kindof a sarah mclaughlin arms of an angel thing going on which isnt my jam really but i can still dig it. If it wasn't attached to this incident by the stupid video intro i'd say she's actually singing the song to herself as a cold comfort in the wake of a giant romantic mistake. who knows? i think she's a much better pop star than 90% of the sad oversexed narcissists that parade around the vmas, and i wish her the best of luck.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 9:29 AM on September 14, 2010


The real question is, why is Swift done up like Sophie-Anne?
posted by The Whelk at 9:31 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


I don't believe it was a charade. She looked confused, bewildered, even devastated.

I think it's possible that both she was devastated and that the scenario had been planned out, buit I wasn't there, so Im'ma just shut up about it now.
posted by blucevalo at 9:31 AM on September 14, 2010


I like her, and want her to be successful, but I want her to quit screeching at me. I keep wanting her to make the jump to movies, where her assets are more applicable, and that's where the real money is anyway.

She's already made the jump to movies, a little bit - she was in that Valentine's Day movie earlier this year, and had a non-bit part in CSI: Vegas... But her acting in both of those leads me to believe that she is not NEARLY good enough of an actor to have pulled off the emotions she showed on stage when Kanye stole the mic last year.
posted by antifuse at 9:45 AM on September 14, 2010


The moon man has never actually been on the moon. Discuss.
posted by cavalier at 9:46 AM on September 14, 2010 [3 favorites]


Her voice isn't any worse than any other pop musician's, really. I mean, she's no Helen Massey*, but she's not really bad. This particular song is a little cringe-inducingly non-melodious. Some of her other songs are all right, and a little heartwarmingly cute, in a gay or straight context.

* Some of you might know her from her role in Cats as the singing voice of Jemima, a kitten who first realizes what Old Deuteronomy's lessons mean for Grizabella.
posted by thesmophoron at 9:50 AM on September 14, 2010


If it wasn't attached to this incident by the stupid video intro i'd say she's actually singing the song to herself as a cold comfort in the wake of a giant romantic mistake.

The incident's inclusion in the music video doesn't mean it was her inspiration for writing the song in the first place.
posted by thesmophoron at 9:58 AM on September 14, 2010


doesn't mean it was her inspiration for writing the song in the first place.

Or that she actually wrote it.
posted by The World Famous at 9:59 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


I can't quite believe that anyone thinks the integrity of NPR's news coverage hinges on whether or not one of the zillion sections on their website is a media blog.

And I have to say, for a media blog, this is well above-average wit and snark:

I'd just like to pause at this point and say to the guy who bumped into me on the Metro the other day: It's all right. Don't hate yourself. Your family still loves you. Probably.
posted by straight at 10:00 AM on September 14, 2010


The Whelk: "...is there a DSM entry for what is wrong with Taylor Swift?
"

Yep. It's called I'm-Really-Good-At-Making-A-Lot-Of-Money-By-Keeping-My-Brand-Accessible-To-My-Audience-itis.
posted by l33tpolicywonk at 10:04 AM on September 14, 2010


I don't have a comment about the NPR thing but I just have to say that Kanye's song at the end of the VMAs made me laugh out loud. Let's have a toast for the douche bags!
posted by shmurley at 10:05 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


To me, the only good thing about seeing an asshole being "right", i.e. in full agreement with me, is that it motivates me to rethink my opinion to make sure that I AM right. On a few occasions, that rethinking has resulted in a changed opinion, but never just because of the asshole's support.

As for Taylor's Taylor Guitar, when I was growing up, before my 'unofficial name change', I owned several Craig brand cassette players/recorders, because that WAS my name. I credit that bit of ego-massaging for the fact that I never got into 8-tracks.

And don't forget to call her MEFI'S OWN Linda Holmes. But before her NPR gig, when she was lurking the 'Filter, she was one of the original Television Without Pity crew of snarky recappers, specializing in Reality TV, and she and I competed for pieces of the freelance budget at the TV section of MSNBC.com. Once when I got an assignment to write about "Big Brother", I felt proud to have 'beaten' Linda Holmes for the gig... then I realized I had to write about "Big Brother". AAARRRGGGHHH.

And I've heard that next year the MTV VMAs will bring back the 'moon man', but he'll be wearing a spacesuit made out of meat.
posted by oneswellfoop at 10:08 AM on September 14, 2010


when I was growing up, before my 'unofficial name change', I owned several Craig brand cassette players/recorders, because that WAS my name.

I admit - my favorite dinosaur has always been the Tri-SARAH-tops.
posted by muddgirl at 10:09 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


Instead of singing a saccharine overly-dramatic song about it on the VMAs she should have played the thing with some levity (maybe a duet with Kayne) and come out of the whole thing looking like gold.

This, Solon and Thanks. I kept waiting for Kanye to pop out of the dark and creepy stage set and for the whole thing to go totally Bollywood musical on us, the suffering audience. But no. Damn it.
posted by bitter-girl.com at 10:12 AM on September 14, 2010


yep, that taylor swift one hell of a songwriter (as long as you ignore that basically all her singles were cowritten by liz rose). at least it's not a 60 year old man writing the words for a 20 year old girl. i guess that's progress?
posted by nadawi at 10:16 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


I admit - my favorite dinosaur has always been the Tri-SARAH-tops.

And that's why I live in AmERICa.
posted by ericb at 10:20 AM on September 14, 2010 [2 favorites]


So songwriters who have a writing partner should get no credit at all? Or should we say that she is only one-half-hell-of-songwriter?
posted by muddgirl at 10:22 AM on September 14, 2010


then I realized I had to write about "Big Brother". AAARRRGGGHHH.

Writing about Big Brother is its own reward, punishment, and condemnation from whatever higher power you hold dear. Be glad it wasn't Bachelor Pad.
posted by Linda_Holmes at 10:29 AM on September 14, 2010 [3 favorites]


or Jersey Shore. Shudder.
posted by morganannie at 10:30 AM on September 14, 2010


So songwriters who have a writing partner should get no credit at all? Or should we say that she is only one-half-hell-of-songwriter?

Songwriting pairs or teams are rarely accurately represented publicly in terms of what percentage of the writing they do. Is there any reason to believe that Taylor Swift receives a 50% songwriting credit or that she does 50% or more of the songwriting?
posted by The World Famous at 10:46 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


She doesn't write her own songs the way we think she does. I read an article about how she actually comes with with an idea for a song and she has people who "help" her "write" it. It's like if a Westinghouse science award winner' parents bought the foremost science talent to "help" their kid do a science project.

There are real people who are talented out there in the world. It just helps so much if you're pretty and have rich, supportive parents.

That being said, she's pretty and I
like her songs. They are cute.
posted by anniecat at 10:56 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


Why does MTV have music video awards when they don't even play music videos? AMIRITE?

Taylor Swift is boring.
posted by delmoi at 10:56 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


Her voice isn't any worse than any other pop musician's, really.

Huh. I tend to agree with dfc (glad I wasn't the only one to think her voice wouldn't make the first cut of American Idol).

I'm not a pop-music junkie, but I know most of the players. As far as female contemporaries--Kelly Clarkson, Christina Aguilera, Rihanna, Gaga, Carrie Underwood, etc. (not to mention the older Mariah, Mary J, Celine, etc), Swift just doesn't seem to compare, voice wise.

I realize that voice isn't everything (Madonna has a few fans), but that seems to be her shtick, i.e. she's not a "performer" like Katy Perry or Shakira or what have you.

Her persona seems to be the "nice girl with a great voice" except her voice is horrible. I mean I obviously get the appeal of a beautiful, virginal, blonde, white female pop star ... I suppose it is LCD writ large.
posted by mrgrimm at 10:59 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


Why does anyone care about the VMAs anyway? I figure all the people attending are coked out or drunk. Kanye's a jackass but she's got like 3 gazillion in the bank. How is that not a reward in and of itself?
posted by anniecat at 11:01 AM on September 14, 2010


One more thing: if I were Taylor Swift I'd go the Olsen twins way and put my name on and sell sweatpants at Wal-Mart and cash out.

Btw, anyone else creeped out by how she recorded a duet with John Mayer? I could picture him plotting how to get her into the studio to "collaborate," and from the song it's clear her voice isn't suited to the song at all. Unless John Mayer needs to sell more than the usual songs to support his douchebaggery or whatever.

Stay away from that creepo, Taylor Swift!
posted by anniecat at 11:10 AM on September 14, 2010


Oh my god. They're just having a little fun with this, people! And also keeping their names in the news! So they can continue to bathe in solid gold baths and only take one bite out of an apple and then just throw it away because they're so rich.
posted by Mister_A at 11:14 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


Also really best music video for her video last year? That was an insult to literally all other videos. Her's was impossibly bland and dumb and unspecial. She deserved nothing. I really hold whoever selected her for victory in the first place more blame for Kanye embarassing her than I hold Kanye. I know the VMAs are supposed to be dumb, but her winning made them worse than meaningless.

Like it was almost like in Carrie where they vote her prom queen just to make fun of her. It was like that. Because the video was that bad.
posted by I Foody at 11:16 AM on September 14, 2010 [3 favorites]


Yo Swift/Kanye, I'm really happy for you -- IMMA LET YOU FINISH -- but Martin & Lewis had one of the best onstage reconcilliations of ALL TIME!!!
posted by mazola at 11:17 AM on September 14, 2010 [2 favorites]


I just watched Kanye's song...it's...really...good I think?. Possibly the best live performance of the past i dont know how long. What a big magical fuck you to the whole entertainment establishment.

"Baby I got a plan. Run away as fast as you can..."

"Hi. I am one of these people now. And we suck. So hell, congratulations to us. We're actually miserable, but we get a lot of shit done, some of it amazing. We don't have any insight, and you would not want to have a beer with us, but we're well aware of how truly wealthy and tasteful people view us. We are morally broken in some fundamental way. For those about to be shameful for public spectacle-- I shall, for this one time only, salute you. Everyone else: bite me."
posted by Potomac Avenue at 11:27 AM on September 14, 2010 [2 favorites]


Like it was almost like in Carrie where they vote her prom queen just to make fun of her. It was like that. Because the video was that bad.

You know, I really love this scene in the movie Hitch where Kevin James has inflicted on him some really negative overcritical pretentious high society types and he quite handily puts them in their place.
posted by thesmophoron at 11:27 AM on September 14, 2010


at least half of the times i laugh out loud at a post on this site, i look down and see "Greg Nog"
posted by p3on at 11:36 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


Yeah that new Kanye track is sort of a gem (studio version here). The man continues to be fascinating and conflicted and a great producer.
posted by naju at 11:40 AM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


Despite having a big ego (some may say super ego) Kayne acts like an id.
posted by SouthCNorthNY at 11:41 AM on September 14, 2010


The NPR piece made me laugh. Both performances were absolutely (unintentionally) hilarious. I mean, I was watching alone and hiding my eyes in embarrassment. My kids were texting me and howling at the spectacle. Although Taylor's dress was excellent!
posted by thinkpiece at 11:42 AM on September 14, 2010


I only listen to music which is endorsed by Cameron Crowe or Wes Anderson. Who are these people. What is VMA.
posted by tigrefacile at 12:30 PM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


Yeah that new Kanye track is sort of a gem

It's OK, but all I can think of is how much better it would be if Cee-Lo were singing.
posted by mrgrimm at 12:43 PM on September 14, 2010 [2 favorites]


I actually like Taylor Swift. She doesn't seem extraordinarily talented, or anything, but she puts out some fun catchy pop songs you can sing along to in the car. Most teenage American girls would find something in her music compelling and easy to relate to, no matter how cliche, and she seems like a genuinely sweet person who is living her dream. Seems fair that she win an MTV VMA for it -- it's not like she got the Noble Peace Prize.

I guess my point is one can have degrees of liking things. It's not just "THIS IS ART" and "THIS IS TRASH".
posted by Solon and Thanks at 12:51 PM on September 14, 2010 [2 favorites]


Seems fair that she win an MTV VMA for it

It seems to me that an award for the best video of the year should go to something that at least approaches the top, I don't know, 100 videos of the year. Doesn't that seem more fair than giving the best video of the year award to something that is merely catchy and fun but not, say, the best of the year?
posted by The World Famous at 12:53 PM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


So songwriters who have a writing partner should get no credit at all? Or should we say that she is only one-half-hell-of-songwriter?

I know little about HER. In general you get a songwriting credit legally if you even change a word or two in a lyric. Lots of famous singers will tell a songwriter they will choose their song if they can have a writing credit, or will refuse to do a song unless they can get a writing credit. (There is profit margin involved with this, not necessarily wanting to be known as creative. Even one percent of a credit on a hit song is actual money.)

I assume that she does at least put forth some effort into a song. I write myself and know how easy it is to take a meh song and turn it into a fine effort if you have the right cowriter. (I don't really like to cowrite but if I have a good idea and a meh lyric I occasionally will find a cowriter instead of trashing the whole bit.)
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 1:08 PM on September 14, 2010


This together with Beck (Glenn, not the musician(s)), the Pastor, the Tea Party (not the Canadian Doors tribute band), Star Wars Christmas, Russel T. Davies, Favre, etc. Quite astounding.
posted by juiceCake at 1:11 PM on September 14, 2010


It seems to me that an award for the best video of the year should go to something that at least approaches the top, I don't know, 100 videos of the year

Who decides upon the top 100 videos of the year? (Honest question. I can't find any charts.)

Anyway, clearly enough people liked her video the best that they voted for it.
posted by Solon and Thanks at 1:11 PM on September 14, 2010


Seems fair that she win an MTV VMA for it

Not when Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It) was up for the same award. That's just ridiculous. Ridiculous.
posted by two or three cars parked under the stars at 1:17 PM on September 14, 2010 [4 favorites]


Ok, went to the video. Not a strong voice. Too bad I'm not tall, blonde, skinny and 20 years old....but hey, if Dylan can sing in public, so can she.

I confess I prefer not-perfect voices like hers-WHEN they are singing their original stuff. They have a vision of what they want the song to sound like...
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 1:19 PM on September 14, 2010


I'm sure it's crossed your minds that maybe Kanye and Taylor Swift just need to, you know, f*** and get it over with.
posted by jabberjaw at 1:21 PM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


Beyonce dancing? Look, that was well choreographed, she's a good performer but that doesn't necessarily make it the best VIDEO. We get that it was a popular song and all but there are other awards for that.
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 1:33 PM on September 14, 2010


While Taylor Swift's video wasn't great - Beyonce's video consists of her and two dancers... Dancing. It's some fantastic dancing, but as a concept it's not exactly groundbreaking innovation either. IMO it's a tossup between the two. Is Beyonce's a better song? Maybe. But I'm not a 13 year old girl, which I suspect the demographic that spends the majority of their time watching videos on MTV (or MTV2, or whichever MTV affiliate actually plays videos these days). And popularity of videos on said channels (does MTV still have a video countdown of some sort?) is most likely how these awards get chosen.

Or, it's all random bullshit based on some handwavy notion of "popularity" that's decided on completely on a whim.
posted by antifuse at 1:51 PM on September 14, 2010


Beyonce's video consists of her and two dancers... Dancing

Bro, that is by definition a great video.
posted by Mister_A at 1:56 PM on September 14, 2010 [5 favorites]


One interesting thing about the Beyonce video is that as much as it was designed to be played on MTV, it was designed more to be played on iPods and mobile phones, hence the extreme simplicity. If I'd been given a ballot, I'd have voted for Beyonce.
posted by roll truck roll at 2:18 PM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


Beyonce's video consists of her and two dancers... Dancing. It's some fantastic dancing, but as a concept it's not exactly groundbreaking innovation either.

Not groundbreaking, perhaps, but in terms of classic videos, minimalist or not, it's up there. It surely is at least the equal of Godley and Creme.
posted by blucevalo at 2:45 PM on September 14, 2010


Not when Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It) was up for the same award.

Shane Mercado's rendition [YouTube views to date: 2,851,964].
posted by ericb at 3:00 PM on September 14, 2010


from karnythia:

You can't convince me that you don't want to talk about the past when you do a performance all about it. Barefoot, standing like a broken doll, and all but crying your way through the whole thing. Ooh, a whole stage show geared to present this image of delicate white femininity while you sing about your innocence being violated. By a scary black man.

Gee, that's not a coded message we've seen before at all. Oh wait, let's talk about the idea of white people feeling violated by black people "not knowing their place" and what that's meant historically to American society. Better yet, let's really dig down into why we're singing about violated innocence like being interrupted on stage is at all equivalent to being physically assaulted. Oh, but then we might have to get into who interrupted her and whether this would be such a big deal if the racial makeup was different... Taylor Swift's paean to being Kanye's "victim" makes me want to roll my eyes at her routine as well as some of the reactions to it. Because if this what happens when someone is rude to a white woman in public we really haven't come past race at all.
posted by ShawnStruck at 4:15 PM on September 14, 2010 [3 favorites]


Taylor Swift's paean to being Kanye's "victim" makes me want to roll my eyes at her routine as well as some of the reactions to it.

Didn't you already want to roll your eyes at Taylor Swift, Kanye, and every other performer within a 500-yard radius of the VMAs? I know I did.

This is not what happens when someone is rude to a white woman in public. This is what happens when massive corporate multimedia juggernauts decide to manipulate the public as part of a multi-faceted marketing plan.
posted by The World Famous at 4:25 PM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


I enjoy watching you all give a shit about this. Carry on. :)
posted by davejay at 4:36 PM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


This is good, because up until this moment I actually had a little hope in the day, and nobody to despise, and that felt really weird.
posted by turgid dahlia at 4:45 PM on September 14, 2010


If I'd been given a ballot, I'd have voted for Beyonce.

I definitely would have, also, but my point was it's not some great crime of the century that Swift won.
posted by Solon and Thanks at 4:57 PM on September 14, 2010


All you need to know about Taylor Swift's singing ability is contained right here in her totally fucked up duet with Stevie Nicks from the Grammys.
posted by kosem at 5:24 PM on September 14, 2010 [3 favorites]


A few points here:
1.) Kanye's song was unbelievably bad. Not only for it's awful hook, but the whole thing. His attempt to impress by playing a MPC live was just shameless and sounded horrid.
2.) Taylor's song was awful too, but mostly just because it is a stupid song.
3.) Why was Kanye wearing a black, deep-v wife beater?
4.) Why was Pusha T wearing a salmon blazer with the sleeves pushed up? And, on the same topic, why put Pusha, one of the best rappers alive, on a stupid track and not even let him rap about cocaine?
5.) This video is the best example ever of 2 wrongs making a right. U2 plus Taylor Swift should not equate to something awesome. Actually, it is THREE wrongs, when you consider that it's a mashup.

Oh, metafilter, who you are is not what you did (in this thread).
posted by broadway bill at 5:33 PM on September 14, 2010 [2 favorites]


Oh RiRi?

Ya, RiRi!
posted by turgid dahlia at 5:40 PM on September 14, 2010


holy crap broadway bill. i mean, i hate taylor swift and i hate u2 - but i'm weirdly sort of bobbing my head.
posted by nadawi at 5:43 PM on September 14, 2010


They both still suck and need to get the fuck off my lawn.
posted by jonmc at 6:46 PM on September 14, 2010


Pusha T looked amazing. On the real.
posted by wemayfreeze at 7:01 PM on September 14, 2010


Kanye and Taylor are two of the best things to happen to pop music in the last x years. On the real.
posted by wemayfreeze at 7:30 PM on September 14, 2010


Stop saying 'on the real.' Really.
posted by jonmc at 7:40 PM on September 14, 2010


Come on, yo. "On the real" is off the chain.
posted by The World Famous at 7:42 PM on September 14, 2010




Whoa whoa jonmc, looks like someone's fallen off the real!
posted by wemayfreeze at 8:30 PM on September 14, 2010 [1 favorite]


I still maintain that Gaga should have won that night for Paparazzi.
posted by jnaps at 8:37 PM on September 14, 2010 [2 favorites]


Taylor fiddled while culture burned.
posted by simms2k at 9:21 PM on September 14, 2010


Yup. Shes acting like a typical rich white girl who feels shes been wronged because someone spoke out of turn at her debutante ball.
posted by hal_c_on at 2:35 AM on September 15, 2010 [1 favorite]


I think we're being too hard on her. Kanye was obviously really upset by it (as evidenced by his twitter feed). He also got a HUGE amount of hateration from all sides, horrible press, people booing him at concerts. It wasn't treated as "just" an interruption by anyone. I think that it's sweet, in a sorta twisted way, that she wrote him a nice song about how he's a good person and how she forgives him. Maybe everyone else can, too.
posted by the young rope-rider at 6:25 AM on September 15, 2010 [1 favorite]


the young rope-rider: "I think that it's sweet, in a sorta twisted way, that she wrote him a nice song about how he's a good person and how she forgives him. Maybe everyone else can, too."

The song infantalizes a black dude. That's pretty messed up.
posted by ShawnStruck at 7:55 PM on September 15, 2010


That particular black dude has been infantilizing himself for quite a while now.
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 4:41 AM on September 16, 2010


Yeah, there's more than a hint of minstrelsy in Kanye's "rich idiot" persona. Anyway, the whole thing was so coordinated and contrived, taking sides seem silly. Obviously both those songs and performances were carefully calculated to please certain people and piss off others. I'm sure both of them were strongly encouraged to comment on the incident (though it probably didn't take much to convince Kanye, let's be honest). The Taylor Swift song in particular seems like a song written on another subject entirely that was lazily repurposed for this.

It is sort of fascinating how the performances attempt to elevate this whole petty thing to mythopoetic levels. Kanye as Lucifer, the rake in the red suit, and Taylor Swift as Virgin Mary or something, barefoot country girl martyr. What's funny is that they're at such cross-purposes they don't even really interact -- Taylor offers forgiveness to Kayne, who doesn't want it anymore, but it doesn't matter because Taylor's forgiveness is really more about herself than anything. So I guess it's more like Narcissus and Echo, or Narcissus and Narcissus. (First person to photoshop that wins an unpleasant mashup.) To top it off, the songs are weirdly similar: undeniably catchy, goofy lyrics, annoying production values, appalling singing, same key, really similar chord progressions. Yep, I bet that mashup is not long in coming.
posted by speicus at 5:46 PM on September 16, 2010 [1 favorite]


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