Belgium. Not boring. Honest.
September 27, 2010 3:10 PM   Subscribe

 
Well, I suppose they *could* all be speaking German.
posted by Artw at 3:16 PM on September 27, 2010




And the award for "Most non-gratuitous uses of the word Belgium in a Metafilter post" goes to...
posted by kmz at 3:28 PM on September 27, 2010 [3 favorites]


No mention of Soulwax?
FPP rejected due to radness deficiency.
posted by Senor Cardgage at 3:29 PM on September 27, 2010 [1 favorite]


Also, lovely architecture
posted by el io at 3:29 PM on September 27, 2010


I have never understood why places in Europe are so closely associated with chocolate. It's not like they grow it there. It's like calling it "Canadian coffee" because it was roasted or brewed in Canada. No one does that. But "belgian chocolate"? That's somehow OK.

I mean, really.
posted by GuyZero at 3:35 PM on September 27, 2010 [1 favorite]


Belgium: "To sudden death" (A worthy watering hole, if a bit of a tourist trappiste.)
posted by chavenet at 3:36 PM on September 27, 2010


I mean, the one brad listed on that page is called "Côte-d'Or" because it's from the Gold Coast of Africa, ffs. It's African chocolate that Belgians like to eat a lot of.
posted by GuyZero at 3:37 PM on September 27, 2010


Don't forget unspeakably gorgeous dogs.
posted by Wolfdog at 3:41 PM on September 27, 2010


The politics certainly is infuriating. Another good take on it is Welkom in België/Bienvenue en Belgique, a collaboration by a Vlaams and French rappers.

Also, don't forget that both Technotronic and Front 242 are Belgian.
posted by rider at 3:44 PM on September 27, 2010


I have never understood why places in Europe are so closely associated with chocolate. It's not like they grow it there.

Chocolate isn't "grown." It is made by humans. Who live in Belgium.
posted by dhammond at 3:45 PM on September 27, 2010 [10 favorites]


Someone has to do the oppressing!
posted by Artw at 3:47 PM on September 27, 2010


GuyZero - I'm guessing that either you've never been to Belgium or you don't really like chocolate.

Because there is a difference between the raw chocolate ingredient and the magical creations of the chocolatiers. And the Belgians have some of the best chocolatiers in the world.

Also some of the best beers. And they are friendly people who like live music a lot.

And I really badly miss living in Brussels.
posted by motty at 3:48 PM on September 27, 2010 [4 favorites]


As for Brel, there is also this side of him.
posted by motty at 3:53 PM on September 27, 2010


Massively beautiful horses too.
posted by sidereal at 4:08 PM on September 27, 2010


And the Belgians have some of the best chocolatiers in the world.

Raw coffee beans, grown in say, Columbia, are shipped to the US and roasted, ground and brewed by Americans. No one calls it "American coffee". It's called "Columbian coffee".

Also, I do really like chocolate and there's an increasing trend to identify chocolates by their origin and chocolate manufacturers are starting to produce more single-origin chocolates to create a product with more terroir than one which uses a blend of beans. Valrhona, for example, has a line of estate-grown bars which come from a single harvest from a single plantation and are identified by the country of origin and/or the plantation.

As for Belgians having the best chocolatiers this is a little like pronouncing that one country has the best vintners and I'm not sure if I'm going to agree on this point. Belgium has many fine chocolatiers although many of them are merely confectioners who melt, mix and form chocolates but don't process raw cocoa beans themselves. It's an art to be sure, but the chocolates are no more Belgian than the coffee.
posted by GuyZero at 4:21 PM on September 27, 2010


We can agree to disagree, GuyZero. All I know is that when I came back to the UK from Brussels, I had the crushing realisation that we don't actually have chocolate in my country.

There's plenty of sweet fatty brown chocolate flavoured stuff and so on, but this is an entirely different substance, which maybe someone waved some actual cocoa-derived product vaguely near at some point.
posted by motty at 4:31 PM on September 27, 2010 [4 favorites]


Don't forget unspeakably gorgeous dogs.

Don't forget unspeakably frequent shit piles on Breussels' sidewalks left by said dogs. Seriously, watch you step there, man.

(Brother lives in Brussels.)
posted by ZenMasterThis at 4:34 PM on September 27, 2010


We can agree to disagree, GuyZero. All I know is that when I came back to the UK from Brussels, I had the crushing realisation that we don't actually have chocolate in my country.

Heh. Cheap UK chocolate is ambrosia of the gods compared with American cheap chocolate, which tastes like over-sugared vomit.
posted by Artw at 4:39 PM on September 27, 2010 [6 favorites]


Belgium has many fine chocolatiers although many of them are merely confectioners who melt, mix and form chocolates but don't process raw cocoa beans themselves.

By definition, that's what the word "chocolatier" means: someone who makes confectionery from chocolate. "Chocolate makers" are the ones who process the cocoa beans. If you want to point out that the raw product comes from elsewhere, sure, but I think most people realize that just like most people realize a chef "merely" cooks and forms food grown elsewhere.
posted by Solon and Thanks at 4:42 PM on September 27, 2010 [2 favorites]


That most chocolate is cheap is not the issue. There's a lot of generic "coffee" which has been blended beyond recognition and then prepared by illiterate morons who also have no sense of taste. The issue is that if you're going to associate a product with a location, it should be the location of the product's origin and not the colonizers/marketers who just happen to put a wrapper on it.

Now, I know that producing chocolate is a lot more than putting a wrapper on ground cocoa beans, but we're past the point where the secrets of Swiss conching machinery make much of a difference as everyone knows this stuff now. I think it would be beneficial to the plantations and the pretty much totally exploited workers therein to identify the product based on where it originated.
posted by GuyZero at 4:43 PM on September 27, 2010 [1 favorite]


I think most people realize that just like most people realize a chef "merely" cooks and forms food grown elsewhere.

It depends on whether you're working with the naming model used for coffe and wine or the naming model used for hamburgers.

Perhaps I've simply been in California too long and restaurants have stopped talking about their chefs and now seem primarily to trumpet the origin of their ingredients. To label dishes with Marin County cheese and Nieman Ranch beef is pretty typical hereabouts.
posted by GuyZero at 4:46 PM on September 27, 2010


Pretty sure Tcho don't refer to their product as wherever-their-beans-are-from chocolate.
posted by Artw at 4:55 PM on September 27, 2010


(which, in my mind at least, will always be the Plateau of Leng)
posted by Artw at 4:56 PM on September 27, 2010


I think it would be beneficial to the plantations and the pretty much totally exploited workers therein to identify the product based on where it originated.

How so?
posted by Solon and Thanks at 4:56 PM on September 27, 2010


Now I really want a Flake.
posted by Artw at 4:58 PM on September 27, 2010 [1 favorite]


Heh. Cheap UK chocolate is ambrosia of the gods compared with American cheap chocolate, which tastes like over-sugared vomit earwax.

FTFY, Artw.

Accuracy is important, in vilification.
posted by IAmBroom at 4:59 PM on September 27, 2010 [3 favorites]


Oh, it's definatly vomit, in the case of Hersheys in particular.
posted by Artw at 5:07 PM on September 27, 2010 [1 favorite]


How so?

When coca is a purely fungible commodity the producers have little to no leverage and thus it's a race to the bottom where the cheapest producer gets the business. This is not conducive to producing a better quality product and it also typically ends up with a lot of exploited workers, including children.

Giving the producers brand and some sort or marketable recognition means they have more leverage in pricing their product and gives them incentives to produce a better quality product. It's basically the same idea as fair-trade coffee. Fair-trade has not really caught on as much for chocolate although I have seen fair-trade bars here and there although they weren't otherwise notable in therms of quality.

I really like chocolate but I'm not so fond of contemplating that soem 10 year-old kid got beat because he wasn't hauling cocoa pods fast enough.
posted by GuyZero at 5:32 PM on September 27, 2010


Don't forget cyclists.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 5:50 PM on September 27, 2010


I don't quite understand the politics even after reading the link. Stupid Flanders.
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 5:52 PM on September 27, 2010 [4 favorites]


Oh, it's definatly vomit, in the case of Hersheys in particular.
posted by kcds at 6:48 PM on September 27, 2010


Oh, it's definatly vomit, in the case of Hersheys in particular.

Cheesy vomit, at that. Hershey's has a distinctly cheesy tang to it. And it's gritty. Foul stuff.

Sorry about the double comment - my finger slipped
posted by kcds at 6:50 PM on September 27, 2010


Is it definitely vomit then?
posted by oddman at 6:55 PM on September 27, 2010


We're 30-some comments into this thing and nobody seems to notice the absence of waffles?

(Madam, we must have waffles! We must all have waffles forthwith! We must all think, and we must all have waffles, and think each and every one of us to the very best of his ability)


posted by The Potate at 7:22 PM on September 27, 2010


It's not clear, oddman.

You can't dust for vomit..
posted by motty at 7:40 PM on September 27, 2010 [1 favorite]


Also, the greatest record label in the world.
posted by mykescipark at 8:24 PM on September 27, 2010


Labling the chocolate's country of cocoa origin wouldn't tell the consumer anything about its quality. Its country of manufacture does (I prefer Swiss). Ergo, it is a more useful lable.

There are foods I pick for reasons of social responsibility. Chocolate is not one of them.
posted by Omnomnom at 9:51 PM on September 27, 2010


I seriously didn't know that trolls fed on (Belgian) chocolate.
posted by Skeptic at 11:13 PM on September 27, 2010 [3 favorites]


Language Log recently posted a fairly helpful, well produced animation explaining the triune nature of the country. I was mildly intrigued before, now that I'm in the next country over from Belgium, but now I'm sold on visiting.
posted by knile at 11:20 PM on September 27, 2010


Seeing a Metafilter thread about Belgium where people end up discussing chocolate - it's a bit like a Metafilter thread about the UK where everyone ends up discussing bowler hats.

This video was clearly made by a French-speaker - why insist on the fact that the Flemish region is monolingual, when Wallonia (or "WallOOnia" as she mystifyingly pronounces it in the video) doesn't accept Flemish social services either? Always these little undercurrents of tension.

Then again, I've been living here for five years now, and I think there's a good reason that most expats in Brussels (and many Dutch-speakers) side with the Walloons. Plenty of the Flemish arguments are valid: the Francophones don't make the effort to learn Dutch, and Brussels is not really a bilingual city, etc. But the tension between the two main communities essentially comes down to the fact that the Flemish are richer, and don't want to pay high taxes to support a poorer region. It's not an argument that particularly warms you to the Flemish.
posted by creeky at 11:32 PM on September 27, 2010 [4 favorites]


Creeky: Especially as 50-60 years ago, the flemsh were poorer and the Walloons were all complaining about how much of their coal and steel profits were going north...

However, when you also consider that the the country's only offical language was French until 1898, but even then Flemish only gradually became acceptable (it took until 1967 for a Flemish constitution to be accepted), you can see why the Flemish feel hard done by...

In a word: complicated! and a lot of history behind it.

My favourite part of Belgium: Baarle-Hertog - a belgian enclave in the Netherlands, with Dutch enclaves in the Belgian Enclaves!
posted by nielm at 12:52 AM on September 28, 2010 [3 favorites]


Re the monolinguism in the different regions - it's not quite the same. In the south, if you go into a government office, the people there may or may not be able to help you in Dutch, depending on their abilities. In Flanders, they are expressly prohibited from speaking anything other than Dutch. (There might be some places where this isn't the case, but not afaik)

When my wife and I lived in the very close suburbs of Brussels, it was a Flemish commune, and doing anything at the town hall was difficult. We have about 5 languages between us, but Dutch wasn't one of them. It was a funny bit of theatre where I would speak to the person in English, or my wife in French, and they would be forced to respond in Dutch, very simple Dutch, bless their hearts, which we would do our best to figure out. Had we lived about 400 meters to the west, the offices would have been bilingual.

Nothing against the people there, it's just the rules that are bad. There are also many opportunistic politicians and newspapers who love to fan the flames.
posted by Steakfrites at 1:22 AM on September 28, 2010


No love for Tintin?
posted by obiwanwasabi at 2:20 AM on September 28, 2010


Belgian painting is remarkable. Sometimes odd, often gloomy, labouring under the influence of Bruegel, but remarkable. It was remarkable in 1400 and it's remarkable today.

some (self) links to random examples: Vaes, de Saedeleer, de Smet, Bosquet, Léon-Henri-Marie Fréderic, Laermans, Carte, Van Schendel, Albert.

And not forgetting..
posted by fire&wings at 3:28 AM on September 28, 2010


In the south, if you go into a government office, the people there may or may not be able to help you in Dutch, depending on their abilities. In Flanders, they are expressly prohibited from speaking anything other than Dutch.

That basically nails it. After a hilarious prank call of a French-speaking radio comedian to the town hall of the Flemish town of Aalst, during which the employees only got permission to answer him in French after he convinced their supervisor that he was a diplomat from a French-speaking African country, the Flemish public radio tried to return the joke by calling a Walloon town, only to be greeted by a public employee who readily answered in flawless Dutch (even if such bilingual Walloons are a rare species indeed). To their credit, they aired the segment.

It's important to note that the author of the video of the first link, even if a native French-speaker, is not really a "Walloon". His patrician family name (de Gerlache, a family that has notably spawned several polar explorers) identify him as a member of the old Flemish Francophone aristocracy. Even if nationalist-minded Flemings resent paying for the dole of jobless working-class Walloons, it's in fact against those culturally snobbish Flemish Francophone patricians, who still control much of the nation's wealth, who they hold a huge chip on their shoulders. One of the most-repeated Flemish grudges, for instance, is that during WWI the French-speaking officers sent their Dutch-speaking soldiers to their deaths with orders issued in a language they couldn't comprehend (as opposed, of course, to the armies of other nations, who sent their soldiers to their deaths with equally incomprehensible orders, but at least in their own language).
Really, both sides of the Belgian debate make the Israel-Palestine debate sound almost rational.
posted by Skeptic at 4:54 AM on September 28, 2010 [3 favorites]


My favourite part of Belgium: Baarle-Hertog - a belgian enclave in the Netherlands, with Dutch enclaves in the Belgian Enclaves!

Hilarious. This is FPP-worthy stuff.
posted by cronholio at 6:01 AM on September 28, 2010


My favourite part of Belgium: Baarle-Hertog - a belgian enclave in the Netherlands, with Dutch enclaves in the Belgian Enclaves!


Hilarious. This is FPP-worthy stuff.
posted by cronholio at 6:01 AM on 9/28


You don't say.
posted by Skeptic at 6:47 AM on September 28, 2010


Wow, thanks Skeptic.
posted by cronholio at 7:53 AM on September 28, 2010


I also, before this thread, only knew of one of Belgium's famous painters, James Ensor.
posted by knile at 9:02 AM on September 28, 2010


One of my favourite bands is Belgian.
posted by Artw at 9:37 AM on September 28, 2010


So far not one mention of the most famous Belgian artist EVAR.
posted by GuyZero at 9:45 AM on September 28, 2010 [1 favorite]


Ensor actually used to be on the 100 franc note before he was replaced by a boring euro bridge. That was one of the banknotes you'd end up using the most, so every time you paid for groceries you had to hand over the weird masks and contorted faces Ensor was famous for.

Magritte (no one has mentioned him yet?) was on the 500, while the 1000 franc note had the relatively less well known Constant Permeke.
posted by Sourisnoire at 10:00 AM on September 28, 2010


Let's not forget some seriously out-there world class fashion.
posted by Elizabeth the Thirteenth at 10:23 AM on September 28, 2010


I can't smurf nobody already smurfed the Smurfs yet? Or Schtroumpfs, their original name. Or Puffi, in Italian. Or Pitufos in Spanish.
posted by keepoutofreach at 11:33 AM on September 28, 2010 [1 favorite]


keepoutofreach The Smurfs had indeed their own take on Belgian politics...30 years ago (nothing much has changed in the meantime).
posted by Skeptic at 12:27 PM on September 28, 2010


37 years ago, not 30 (no, nothing much has changed)
posted by Skeptic at 12:29 PM on September 28, 2010


When I was in Belgium, the chips I made far surpassed the chips I've made in any other location. True fact. It still sort of weirds me out. My working theory is that there's some sort of frite-zone which extend from the top of France up to the North Sea.
posted by pompomtom at 5:46 PM on September 28, 2010


Eh, they were no snorks.
posted by rosswald at 11:07 AM on September 29, 2010 [1 favorite]


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