Huckabee/Torche 2010
October 28, 2010 12:12 AM   Subscribe

Torche is an absolutely incredible stoner metal band from Miami whose pop sensibility has earned them a lot of fans recently. Apparently Mike Huckabee is one of them.
posted by auralcoral (32 comments total) 6 users marked this as a favorite
I seriously doubt a homophobic bigot like Huckabee is aware that a member of Torche is gay.

Or that hatchet-faced child molestor Greg Gutfeld does either.
posted by bardic at 12:41 AM on October 28, 2010 [1 favorite]

I think they're pretty good though.

And I have no idea if hatched-faced Greg Gutfeld molests children, but man, he is one ugly, smug dude who should go die in a fire sooner rather than later.
posted by bardic at 12:42 AM on October 28, 2010

Unless you're a racist homophobe . . .

I can't stand that I just visited Fox News' website (or Huckabee, or his disembodied head), because I'm not a racist homophobe, which seems to be their target demographic.
posted by IvoShandor at 12:45 AM on October 28, 2010

You know...I'm pretty comfortable not listening to the kind of music that Huckabee is a fan of.
posted by hal_c_on at 2:35 AM on October 28, 2010 [1 favorite]

The extent to which these guys are a stoner metal band is debatable. There's enough major and melody to put this closer to nu-metal or metalcore territory - especially when one considers the guitar tone and vocals.
posted by Dysk at 2:53 AM on October 28, 2010 [2 favorites]

Huckabee's not homophobic. He thinks gays can have dogs and everything!

And before people say Huckabee says he was misquoted, I personally know the person who did the interview. He would not have faked those quotes, and has the audiotape to prove it.
posted by mccarty.tim at 4:01 AM on October 28, 2010

Also, how about that Glenn Beck liking Muse, and then Muse being like, "Woah, buddy, no need to slander us with your affection!"
posted by mccarty.tim at 4:03 AM on October 28, 2010

The extent to which these guys are a stoner metal band is debatable.

It sounds like the singer doesn't believe they're any kind of metal at all.
Torche’s guitarist/vocalist Steve Brooks doesn’t even like using the term “metal” when talking about his band’s sprawling, post-rock numbers. “Metal is just something different altogether, although it is the gayest music around,” he says before offering up a laundry list of what makes metal so gay: sweaty men wearing leather and long-hair, beating each other up and bro'ing down in the pit. “It’s very gay,” he adds.
posted by pracowity at 4:07 AM on October 28, 2010

Torche on RED EYE on Fox News, even mentioning some personal sexual preferences.

And Torche ist rad.
posted by gcbv at 4:48 AM on October 28, 2010

Some of their stuff reminds me of Ride and some other shoe-gazy stuff, which is cool as I like that kind of music. Put me down for "not really metal at all."
posted by Mister_A at 5:44 AM on October 28, 2010

Beyond being not metal at all, it isn't stoner at all, either. Elements of shoegaze and post-rock, sure, but there simply isn't enough groove to justify the designation of stoner.
posted by Dysk at 6:17 AM on October 28, 2010 [1 favorite]

That is kinda weird, though.... given that Huckabee is a pretty serious republican presidential contender. Will Mitt Romney finally share his love of the Gravediggaz with the media?
posted by ph00dz at 6:19 AM on October 28, 2010 [1 favorite]

Yeah, but... Does he like "The Machine Rages On"?
posted by symbioid at 6:43 AM on October 28, 2010

His money is as green as anyone's.
posted by wobh at 6:50 AM on October 28, 2010

I ran into Cheney at a Neurosis show. Afterwards by the merch table, we were bullshitting and he mentioned that what he loves most about them is both the air of crushing despair and dissolution of ego and self, as well as the recurring alchemical themes in their lyrics and art, which remind him of the eldritch processes used to maintain his own life force.
posted by FatherDagon at 7:44 AM on October 28, 2010 [8 favorites]

Man, I knew from the first few notes that this band is from Florida.

Pretty sure I even caught a pick squeal or two in there.
posted by functionequalsform at 8:11 AM on October 28, 2010 [2 favorites]

I like Torche, and liked 'em before Huckabee. The Foo Fighters comparison is pretty right on, but I think the "stoner metal" comes from the fact that almost everyone who thinks they like stoner metal is really only talking about liking Queens of the Stone Age, who Torche also sound like (somewhat). Huckabee's not repping Sleep.

Oh, and c'mon, duders, Doom Metal is not Stoner Metal! If he was really your expert, he woulda mentioned that, because metal experts are nothing if not pedantic as hell.
posted by klangklangston at 8:32 AM on October 28, 2010

I liked their Boris split but everything else I've heard has been pretty meh
posted by p3on at 8:34 AM on October 28, 2010

My ex-bf is obsessed with this band. A couple of years ago, he went to one of their shows and ended up meeting them afterwards and offering to let them stay at his house for the night, which they did. And they left him a very nice thank you note. It's good to hear they're doing well.
posted by duvatney at 8:36 AM on October 28, 2010

Good god, genre classifications be damned, I don't give a FUCK...Mike Huckabee is endorsing Torche, people.
posted by auralcoral at 9:43 AM on October 28, 2010

How embarrassing. I've been pronouncing it "Tor-shay" all these years.
posted by garden hoe at 10:25 AM on October 28, 2010

garden hoe: "How embarrassing. I've been pronouncing it "Tor-shay" all these years."

posted by symbioid at 11:00 AM on October 28, 2010

I saw them play recently with Kylesa and High on Fire, after having only heard Meanderthal and In Return. They put on a great live show, but I definitely wouldn't say they're nu-metal. A few of their songs were almost sludge-slow and several of them had mathily complex rhythms.

But yeah, definitely got a little bit of a douche chill realizing that I probably have at least moderate compatibility with Mike Huckabee
posted by cobra_high_tigers at 11:02 AM on October 28, 2010

Ha, I saw this yesterday, strangely just before I was going to see Torche along with Kylesa and High on Fire. Torche had the best set of the night, and clearly had a ton of fun playing. Also, the drummer puked all over during the last song. Still undecided as to whether puking and continuing to play makes them metal, stoner metal, stoner rock, or is a sign of their punk sensibilities.

None of this, however, changes my feelings towards Huckabee.
posted by radiomayonnaise at 11:13 AM on October 28, 2010

Torche is awesome. Wouldn't exactly call them stoner metal, but I know of, um, people who have listened to them in an altered state. Their precursor bands, Floor and Cavity: also awesome.
posted by medeine at 11:18 AM on October 28, 2010

Also, I saw Torche play with Big Business a year or two back, and they are in fact totally excellent. And anyone trying to say they are 'nu-metal' might beware, lest they get a sudden introduction to the infamous 'DC Elbow' at the next show they attend.
posted by FatherDagon at 2:00 PM on October 28, 2010

I remember being baffled when I turned in to "Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me" to hear an affable Southern politician talk about how tickled he was that he got a chance to pardon Keith Richards for an old Arkansan moving violation, and realizing -- Mike Huckabee! That has to be Mike Huckabee!

Guy. In public, you can either be a cross-wielding, Bible-thumping theocrat with a twisted, animal-torturing brood of children or a cheerful suburban relatable dudebro rock fan. You can't be both. It's unfairly terrifying.
posted by Countess Elena at 5:05 PM on October 28, 2010 [1 favorite]

i don't understand any of this at all. listen to floor. (and as far as genre pigeonholing goes, i find torche to be way more sludgy than stonery)
posted by rainperimeter at 10:41 PM on October 28, 2010

LOL. Greg Gutfeld is now officially butthurt.

If only Americans stayed up until 4 AM watching FOX, he could have his justice.
posted by bardic at 9:06 PM on October 31, 2010

I saw them play over the summer, and they were GREAT. It was nice to see a metal band who actually looked like they were having fun.
posted by bibliogrrl at 5:07 PM on November 1, 2010

Heh. If he wasn't such a cheap hatchet-faced child molester, he could pony up the $5 and take out his butthurt here.
posted by klangklangston at 5:27 PM on November 1, 2010

I can get over the fact that Greg Gutfeld is a child molestor, but the hatchet face is really what's disturbing. Not to mention the fact that he's destined to die in a fire.
posted by bardic at 8:16 PM on November 2, 2010

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