Everybody hates cancer.
November 17, 2010 11:04 AM   Subscribe

Ladies, do you love the idea of Movember but find yourself distraught that you can't directly take part? Well, mark your calendars for tomorrow, because that's the day you too can make a difference. posted by jbickers (45 comments total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
 
Uh..ew..wtf?
I say this as a guy with a mustache
posted by Cat Pie Hurts at 11:11 AM on November 17, 2010 [1 favorite]


Poor bearded guys.
Only get laid one day in the year.
posted by joost de vries at 11:12 AM on November 17, 2010


You know who else hates cancer? Guys with really slow growing facial hair. *sigh*
posted by GuyZero at 11:15 AM on November 17, 2010 [1 favorite]


"Cancer gave me crabs" works on so many levels.
posted by DU at 11:15 AM on November 17, 2010 [4 favorites]


I agree with one thing: Cancer is a real a-hole.
posted by Galaxor Nebulon at 11:16 AM on November 17, 2010


But seriously--no moustaches or sex with same. We can stamp this scourge out in our lifetimes.
posted by DU at 11:16 AM on November 17, 2010


Yeah, I'm not having sex with a guy, sorry.
posted by Eideteker at 11:17 AM on November 17, 2010 [1 favorite]


I sport a full beard 365 days of the year. I welcome the idea of more guys having some facial hair--but every guy I've bumped into doing the Movember thing has been a douchebag, for whom growing the 'stache is just one more bro thing to do with their bros. I've seen banker dudes with their white collars and cuffs on their Thomas Pink shirts with these scraggly mustaches, and it's just lame.

I worry that this video is going to get circulated around by bros to their stupid circle of lady-bros, and sex will be had.

I am not in favor of this.
posted by Admiral Haddock at 11:23 AM on November 17, 2010 [2 favorites]


Yeah, I'm not having sex with a guy, sorry.

IT'S FOR LADIES. or dudes who like mustache rides
posted by jessamyn at 11:23 AM on November 17, 2010


The only guy I know taking part in Movember is my dad so, uh, no.
posted by fight or flight at 11:23 AM on November 17, 2010 [1 favorite]


Not all ladies have sex with men.

(I initially typo'd that as "not all ladies have sex with me" which is also true.)
posted by DU at 11:24 AM on November 17, 2010 [3 favorites]


Yeah, I was expecting a "ditch your Brazilian this month" meme. 'Cause fucking in support and solidarity with prostate cancer survivors is kind of the worst O. Henry parody ever.
posted by applemeat at 11:25 AM on November 17, 2010 [8 favorites]


What the...did you edit that or did I miss the small print?
posted by DU at 11:25 AM on November 17, 2010


I added it 20 seconds later just to not have this thread take a heteronormative derail on account of my short sightedness, yes.
posted by jessamyn at 11:25 AM on November 17, 2010


Yeah, I didn't find this funny. "You're not a whore if it's for charity!"

Pre-emptively: No, not a whoosh. I get it, I just don't like it.
posted by Gator at 11:26 AM on November 17, 2010


From the YT comments: Ladies, I love you all, and I love you for making this great sacrifice for my balls, may they never get cancer. But I gotta say, the 18th? That's too soon ladies. Too soon. 18 days my lip fuzz is still bristly. I don't want to scratch that honey pot. I say we reconvene on the 25th, and if that is still to rough we'll try again on the 30th.

See you then.


Reading that makes it pretty likely I'll never want to have sex again, let alone in twenty-four hours.
posted by gladly at 11:34 AM on November 17, 2010


A buddy of mine's take on this:

I had wondered when the recent trend of "Be as slutty as you want, so long as you vaguely tie it into cancer awareness!" would reach its logical conclusion. I guess the bra color thing started it -- and then there was "sexy cancer" ...so I guess this is the next logical level. We're creating, in an entire generation, a Pavlovian response of arousal at the mention of cancer. I have to admit, the anarchist in me is delighted.
posted by jbickers at 11:36 AM on November 17, 2010 [5 favorites]


Ladies, do you love the idea of Movember but find yourself distraught that you can't directly take part?

Nope.....and nope.
posted by pinky at 11:39 AM on November 17, 2010 [4 favorites]


That blonde wants to be Amy Poehler SO HARD.
posted by klangklangston at 11:42 AM on November 17, 2010 [2 favorites]


I've been showing my solidarity for both Beardtober and Movember by refraining from shaving anything. Oh I groom a little bit, the way any self-respecting man will do for his 'stache, but otherwise I am au natural.

At first I felt like a hippy, but now I'm sort of meh about it. I'm a primate. I have body hair. If my mother is any indication, some day I will have facial hair, and it will be sexy.
posted by muddgirl at 11:51 AM on November 17, 2010 [1 favorite]


Yeah, I was expecting a "ditch your Brazilian this month" meme.
posted by applemeat at 7:25 PM on November 17


I would support a "Ditch Your Brazilian Eternity" meme. Enough with this female-pubic-hair-hating bullshit. Enough, I say. Real (hetero) men don't fear female pubic hair. When I was a lad men who did fear female pubic hair needed to be watched, if you catch my drift.
posted by Decani at 12:08 PM on November 17, 2010 [4 favorites]


The last bag of chicken feed I bought at Tractor Supply was pink for breast cancer awareness. I'm not sure what to make of that.
posted by electroboy at 12:09 PM on November 17, 2010 [2 favorites]


You know who else hates cancer? Guys with really slow growing facial hair. *sigh*

As a mustachioed American, I give you permission to... um... demonstrate your hatred of cancer.
posted by grubi at 12:11 PM on November 17, 2010


It seems to me that the targets of satire here are those saucy breast cancer "awareness" memes (bra color; where you "like it" re: your purse) that many of us take issue with for sexualizing a devastating disease. How come the male equivalent for prostate cancer awareness doesn't take a "naughty" sexualized approach like what we've been doing for breast cancer awareness? There are a few levels of pointed commentary here.

That said, I have no idea what this Asylum thing is, it looks like a Maxim-ish men's site. So maybe I'm being too generous.
posted by naju at 12:12 PM on November 17, 2010 [1 favorite]


The last bag of chicken feed I bought at Tractor Supply was pink for breast cancer awareness.

I posted this in an earlier metatalk thread - NASCAR against breast cancer!
Awesome!
posted by Baby_Balrog at 12:15 PM on November 17, 2010


I've been showing my solidarity for both Beardtober and Movember by refraining from shaving anything.

Wait'll you see my efforts this coming Chestuary!
posted by grubi at 12:17 PM on November 17, 2010


MEN: Grow facial hair at your own peril. Vigilantes are on the loose and they are coming for your beards. BEWARE.
posted by (Arsenio) Hall and (Warren) Oates at 12:22 PM on November 17, 2010


Why can't women take part? They are just as able to stop shaving their lip for a month, are they not?
posted by utsutsu at 12:23 PM on November 17, 2010


i love movember, because all these pretty boys get even prettier with a stache. nothing is sexier then that

sexiest facial hair in order:

a) full beard
b) classic full mustache
c) edwardian dandy mustache
d) cowboy/rodeo mustache]
e) cop/mountie stache
f) working class goatee worn in such a way that one can still have
facial hair and wear a mask or the like
g) ambitious sideburns.
posted by PinkMoose at 12:24 PM on November 17, 2010


This guy wants to say Hello
posted by adamvasco at 12:41 PM on November 17, 2010 [1 favorite]


Vigilantes are on the loose and they are coming for your beards

Beware, indeed
posted by Lorin at 1:01 PM on November 17, 2010 [1 favorite]


As a mustachioed American, I give you permission to... um... demonstrate your hatred of cancer.

As a bearded American, I veto your request. Suffer in silence, smoothface.
posted by electroboy at 1:07 PM on November 17, 2010 [1 favorite]


"IT'S FOR LADIES."

So what are dudes who can't grow mustaches supposed to do? Really, I'm disappointed in this lack of forethought and planning. It's just inconsiderate.
posted by Eideteker at 1:48 PM on November 17, 2010


Fake it?
posted by electroboy at 1:53 PM on November 17, 2010


Was completely oblivious of this whole thing, and had me a nice full beard and the embryo of what for me eventually becomes a handlebar moustache which I shaved all off, tout court, like in early November, as I was threatened by the SO with the holding-back of certain privileges.

Oh well.
posted by adoarns at 2:30 PM on November 17, 2010


How come the male equivalent for prostate cancer awareness doesn't take a "naughty" sexualized approach like what we've been doing for breast cancer awareness

Someone's never heard of Goatsember...
posted by inigo2 at 2:49 PM on November 17, 2010 [4 favorites]


I assume that those of us with regular, full-time, non-charity moustaches will continue not to get laid?

(Not that I was getting laid before -- hence the moustache.)
posted by Capt. Renault at 3:03 PM on November 17, 2010


I am awash in Poe's Law here.

First of all, I didn't know about Movember (which I assume is pronounced "Mo-vember", not "Move-ember"?) and now I am a bit sorry that I know about it.

Or whatever, maybe not, I don't know--if it makes people happy to grow moustaches and remind themselves to donate to anti-prostate cancer initiatives, I guess that's awesome. It just seems like the pink ribbon business gone facial hair.

Second, this video is meant to be joking, right? Even if it's "kidding on the square" a bit?

OFF MY LAWN, KIDS! OFF MY LAWN!
posted by Sidhedevil at 4:12 PM on November 17, 2010


sexiest facial hair in order:

a) full beard
b) classic full mustache
c) edwardian dandy mustache
d) cowboy/rodeo mustache]
e) cop/mountie stache
f) working class goatee worn in such a way that one can still have
facial hair and wear a mask or the like
g) ambitious sideburns.


No love for Van Dykes (it's the facial hair of choice or the freaking Musketeers!)?
posted by oddman at 4:57 PM on November 17, 2010


Jessamyn, so what you're saying is that there is an edit button for comments (pony), but only for the chosen.
posted by djfiander at 6:36 PM on November 17, 2010


Only for the employees, yeah. Did you know that Movember was originally Australian? I did not.
posted by jessamyn at 6:40 PM on November 17, 2010


So what are dudes who can't grow mustaches supposed to do? Really, I'm disappointed in this lack of forethought and planning. It's just inconsiderate.

You know who else hates cancer? Guys with really slow growing facial hair. *sigh*


You can always hang out with us ladies who prefer their men without facial hair. Sorry bearded dudes.
posted by MaryDellamorte at 6:55 PM on November 17, 2010


Ladies, it's Armpitcember next month.
posted by Pseudonumb at 1:46 AM on November 18, 2010


as a bear and bear lover, i love movember, because guys do look hot with facial hair, but also because those guys are even cuter for thinking that mo is slang for moustache.
posted by fallacy of the beard at 7:10 AM on November 18, 2010 [2 favorites]


Shame it wasn't funny. And non of them are fit. Fail.
posted by 13twelve at 9:22 AM on November 18, 2010


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