Activity from jessamyn

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I freelance, so this is a struggle for me. However I am also fairly organized and tidy so it's mostly ok. I also do not have to include other people most of the time so ymmv. I have a few guiding principles - I have a big "year at a… [more]
favorited 12 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

I am sorry things have been so shitty, that sucks. It sounds like you've been pulling back a little from the friendship (for good reasons) and maybe, over time, that has shifted how your friend feels about being the primary person responsible when… [more]
favorited 7 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

I am not sure how to proceed. It's okay to talk to your friend. All that weird flirty stuff happened and it happened to you and it's okay to talk about your life. My interpretation is a lot like amtho's: lots of irons in the fire, now… [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Riding in the back of the station wagon without car seats or seat belts. Same with a pickup truck. Was extra fun during haying season and the back was all filled with hay. Realistically this still happens in rural areas (I think) but not… [more]
favorited 3 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

This is an exceptional situation/example where the OP masked the gender of their spouse in their current question but not their previous ones. MeFi doesn't have a real hard and fast "Don't bring in known gender from other questions"… [more]
favorited 7 times
MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

It seems like what you need to do here is plan a sequence of events first and foremost. - Tell daughter you are dating. This will also involve the ex learning that you are dating, I'd just rip the bandaid off on this one. The right time to tell… [more]
favorited 18 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Again, your whole argument seems to hinge on transphobia not being transphobia when it's unintended. I feel like cortex was literally trying to answer layceepee's narrowband question about the specific internal intentions of horrible… [more]
favorited 7 times
MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

I can't speak for cortex, but I did my thesis project on singular they in college which involved a fair amount of research into how people choose, use, and express singular "they" pronouns. My informed impressions were that there was a lot… [more]
favorited 5 times
MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

Libertarians in the US are different from Anarchists in that they usually believe "the market" is the way to level playing fields and get things to work out. So you don't need environmental regulations because better companies will… [more]
favorited 31 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Oh right. Fugazi. I just remember a drunk guy in the stands holloering "Ian!! Ian!!!" and Ian MacKaye stopped the whole show to stare at the dude and then said "You sir are a fucking idiot" Oh hey and thanks to the internet… [more]
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MeFi comment - 2 months ago

My therapist suggested Gretchen Reuben's Four Tendencies. It's a little woo (and it's sort of her "thing") but it did help explicate a conflict my partner and I were getting into, about how we respond to expectations. So it's not like… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Saw them open for Minor Threat in Olympia a zillion years ago. This is welcome news. Thanks for the post. [more]
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MeFi comment - 2 months ago

What do you think about for those 5 to 10 minutes before you fall asleep? Mostly how I would kill to fall asleep in anything like 5-10 minutes! For me, I have to STOP thinking to be able to sleep but I can't actively think about not… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

I love the idea for all the reasons you mention. Just keep the old door if you think people might mind. [more]
favorited 8 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

This is the salad that does not sound amazing but for whatever reason it is really amazing and stupidly simple. 4 carrots (or double seems to work fine too) 1/3 C. salted peanuts 2 T red wine vinegar 2 T peanut oil few drops of sesame… [more]
favorited 8 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

I found a lot of really good discussions of this when Cloud Atlas was around. Since then we've seen a few actors notably talking about racial prejudice in tv and movies, notably Ed Skrein's recent decision to not be in Hellboy (more discussion)… [more]
favorited 2 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Now I want a counterpoint thread to hear about the internal lives of everyone else. I'm a non-ADD person who seems to always date people with ADD. So I know the difference between the way I do a lot of things at once and the way they do… [more]
favorited 22 times
MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

I am a cis male intent on avoiding male gaze/creepiness, so I tend to tread very lightly on approaching strange women for conversation. This is a very good point. Be mindful of the context of whatever specific conversational space you are… [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

I am so sorry. I lost my mother earlier this year and, like your stepfather, it was after a long illness that rapidly progressed. It's hard to feel ready and also not ready. We managed the Life Celebration for my mom, my sister and I. I was happy not… [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Why would a doctor refuse immediate payment? This doctor isn't refusing payment, they are refusing uninsured patients. They may literally not have a price set for a procedure outside of the price insurance sets or they may not have a… [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

I think you're shifting responsibility from yourself to a stranger. This is not a good strategy for fixing your problem. Agreed. And I sympathize that it's hard to find solutions to these sorts of problems. I would also add that it's a… [more]
favorited 6 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

If I saw a headstone with "Husband, Son, Brother, Friend" I would think lots of people loved him, full stop. Likewise. I've spent a lot of time in cemeteries lately and I always love this phrasing. I think "he loved and… [more]
favorited 12 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Nothing at all could make today better for me. [more]
favorited 79 times
MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

It's not inappropriate at all. What Mitch means is that it's inconvenient (for him to have to justify it), so he wants you to drop it. But inappropriate, no. I have been in this situation (as the underpaid woman) working for a website… [more]
favorited 47 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Yeah I would be a little less accommodating in my email. Your suggestion: "Thanks, but [company] is 30-45 minutes from Midway Airport, and I assume longer with rush hour; I'm having trouble understanding how I can get from [company] to… [more]
favorited 2 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Not all as well known but good examples of the genre: Last Dance with Mary Jane by Tom Petty Ballad of Josie and Ed by Bow Thayer Four Blue Walls by The Mammals Rubin and Cherise by the Jerry Garcia Band Silver by Nirvana Transistor Radio by… [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

For the record, I not only answered this question in under a minute, but let the admin record show I fixed a typo in the question first. [more]
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MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

I put up the transcript for people who would prefer to just read and not watch this talk. [more]
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MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

When my mom died this summer one of the things my sister and I talked about in our slightly punchy "Man this is all so ridiculous isn't it?" way was that mom never found out that the time I said my friend's car had broken down and all four… [more]
favorited 9 times
MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

I actually favorite things I want to remember for the podcast and then unfavorite them after the podcast has been recorded, but I don't go all out and un-contact people. We should call favorites star-bellies or something. [more]
favorited 6 times
MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

Nope, still seems reasonable to me. [more]
favorited 6 times
MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

Beeswing and 1952 Vincent Black Lighting by Richard Thompson. (a lot of his stuff actually) Best Ever Death Metal Band out of Denton by The Mountain Goats King Henry and John Barleycorn by Steeleye Span Most murder ballads. [more]
favorited 2 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

I'm being unsupportive because I'm basically saying "don't discuss your genuinely-felt emotions with me," which isn't okay. Also here to say "No, this is okay" And it's tough, right, because if your spouse was… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago


I've been poking around in what was happening at Radcliffe in 1935. There were some changes happening on campus, but nothing major but it might be (noting the black tights) because of the death of William Byerly the last living founder of Radcliffe… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Squirrels don't get that it's cool inside and they will not really be aware that you're out of town (you have a pet sitter coming in, the place isn't uninhabited). If you're super worried, you could put aluminum foil (maybe) or something that is… [more]
favorited 2 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Even the idea of finding a family doctor, which I've heard is notoriously difficult in my province (Alberta), gives me anxiety. Awww I am so sorry you are going through this. It may be helpful to know that one of the side effects of… [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

My partner has an adult child living at home with mh issues about your kid's age (I am using kid here just as shorthand, he's 22). The most challenging thing is the "doesn't leave the house" stuff. Here are a few strategies which they use… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago


wildly inferior layout/style. ... cold dead hands ... [more]
favorited 16 times
MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

is there something a little Marie Antoinette-ish about a charity in this country, which is full of terrible poverty, that says "Oh no! There are people who don't own real estate!?" Generally speaking, to me, no. This seems like… [more]
favorited 6 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

I don't know offhand. He does seem to be responsive to comments on his Shop page on his website. He was a strong advocate for CC licenses on his works as recently at 2013. [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

If I'm reading this and your last question correctly, you went from being an employee of hers to freelancing over the summer. And now she hasn't gotten you the things you need to do the job without you riding herd on her? I think that's a doorway to… [more]
favorited 3 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

He told me not to worry about it but not to do it again That would be my mantra He told me not to worry He told me not to worry He told me not to worry He told me not to worry He told me not to worry Sounds like you have some… [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Limit the size of your family, or adopt. This is huge for two main reasons 1. obviously fewer people consume fewer resources, but also 2. having children makes people a lot more inwardly-focused (for decent reasons) and so they are… [more]
favorited 11 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Good luck wenestvedt! I have to say, I was sort of like "Do marketing for the conference... ehhhhhh" but Lauren was a delight to talk with and what started out to be a 10-20 minute interview turned into what you saw here. I was having a… [more]
favorited 3 times
MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

I have an awful lot of MARC records from NYPL I think... (might not all be books) that I'd happily put up on Dropbox for you. You can also get similar sets from LoC and Open Library. [more]
favorited 3 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

I keep track of every book I read. I found that it was easier for me to put down books I didn't like when I still would enter them on my booklist (i.e. got credit for them even though I marked them as "unfinished", I am a cheevo-driven… [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

His grave didn't deserve the timid wallflowery dance around the malice and brutality that defined his life that it got here, much less the tone deaf praise. Not disagreeing that the man was seriously lousy in many ways, but isn't this… [more]
favorited 25 times
MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

foster a pregnant mama cat? This was going to be my suggestion. My mother did this (both once when I was a child and then again more recently). It's sort of fun to have a cat around the place, and then kittens but also to have the kittens… [more]
favorited 16 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

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