Real Doll --The world's finest love mate

July 9, 2001 5:42 PM

Real Doll --The world's finest love mate Realistic, life-size and beautiful. Elastic flesh, an articulated skeleton and sexy features like no other love doll in the world. Most love dolls are made of cheap, inflatable vinyl. They look pathetic and laughable -- not loveable. Check these out, and for a paltry $7000 you've got the ideal mate.
posted by semmi (20 comments total)

i first heard about this...oh...three years ago.

it was funny at the time. now it's just tired...especially since after the first two 'fan site for my real doll' websites i ran across i started being disgusted and afraid instead of amused.
posted by lunarennui at 6:15 PM on July 9, 2001

A quick look at the search engine reveals that this has been posted a few times before.
posted by lagado at 6:40 PM on July 9, 2001

Thanks for sharing your feelings lunar ennui.....but to a newborn everything is amusing.
posted by semmi at 6:40 PM on July 9, 2001

what IS new is the fact that they now have a male doll.

and in my search i didn't find a link to realdoll on the home page. does it really count as a double post if it's never on the home page?
posted by o2b at 6:50 PM on July 9, 2001

"The male doll can also ejaculate by connecting a remote syringe, and we plan to offer various flavors."

Huh. Neat.
posted by jennyb at 7:18 PM on July 9, 2001

Hmm. Somehow I'd always thought that my Cyborg Assassins would be greeted with terror....
posted by aramaic at 7:22 PM on July 9, 2001

If you were using a male Real Doll for your sexual gratification, wouldn't you want to avoid the messiness of some pseudo-ejaculate, and just "go for the gold" yourself so to speak?

Or would you make him sleep on the wet spot?

(Sorry to be gross, but it had to be asked.)
posted by melissa at 7:30 PM on July 9, 2001

From mena at dollarshort.org:

Oh yeah, the male Realdoll is finally in production.
And he looks kind of like Gary Sinise.
Except, you know, dead. And holding his penis.

Hehe
posted by fooljay at 7:48 PM on July 9, 2001

ew. ew. ew. those six pack abs really creep me out. there's an alien in there.
posted by heather at 7:52 PM on July 9, 2001

this is like picking out a buick.
posted by clavdivs at 8:00 PM on July 9, 2001

this story is as old as dirt.
posted by alfredogarcia at 8:04 PM on July 9, 2001

What if you get a male doll and a female doll... could you make 'em go at it on their own, not only saving you the trouble of dating but the trouble of doing anything at all?
posted by spilon at 9:04 PM on July 9, 2001

RealSheep™
posted by davehat at 9:11 PM on July 9, 2001

Errr... I think you'd have to... uh... you know... manipulate them.

$14k seems like quite a bit to spend on doing nothing at all. You looking to drop some dough, spilon?
posted by daver at 9:13 PM on July 9, 2001

RealHamster™
posted by RylandDotNet at 9:46 PM on July 9, 2001

Oh wow. My first thought on seeing the Realdoll male version was that it looked like the corpse of Gary Sinise, and I hadn't even seen fooljay's comment yet.
posted by phichens at 4:50 AM on July 10, 2001

It would certainly be awkward if someone were to find your dildo lying around, but what would they say if they found the naked dead corpse of Gary Sinese holding his penis in your bathroom? And at least with a dildo, one could quickly and quietly stash it in a drawer. However with Mr. Sinese, christ, you'd be wrestling his stiff (heh) body across the floor only to have your friend open the door at your most glorious moment, wondering what all the commotion was.
posted by crustbuster at 6:12 AM on July 10, 2001

hmm...dead corpse? it's early.
posted by crustbuster at 6:17 AM on July 10, 2001

love mutton. heh
posted by fooljay at 10:17 AM on July 10, 2001

What gets me are the example poses with "him" slouching on the couch with a TV remote and sitting with a half-empty glass of beer.

Also weird: I used to know a guy that looks just like that.
posted by jaded at 5:01 PM on July 10, 2001