Favorites from juv3nal

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MeFi post: "I'm glad I bought it and I'm sure I'll love it in a couple of months"
Russell Brand is so insufferable I'm tempted to go out and buy an Apple Watch right now.
posted to MetaFilter by dis_integration at 6:59 AM on April 27, 2015
MeFi post: Tiny Farms, Tasty Bugs
I have a feeling that at some point down the road, not eating insects will no longer be an option.

So long as there are still other humans it never needs to be an option.
posted to MetaFilter by poffin boffin at 8:20 AM on April 9, 2015
MeFi post: "I would want the dickpic program changed."
It's disappointing how obtuse some of the commenters here are with regards to John Oliver's method of operation. These complaints that Oliver was either posing Pentagon-sympathetic questions or degrading the subject with his "Leno-worthy" bit about people not knowing Snowden are pretty fucking frustrating, to be honest.

Oliver is doing some of the best journalism in the country right now, and is proving that week after week. Who else could get 3.5 milllion... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by rorgy at 5:10 PM on April 6, 2015
MetaTalk post: New mobile ads for logged-out readers on Ask
So is this oil for my torso? Just curious.

My understanding is that the CPM is more or less unaffected by the bodily region to which you apply the coconut oil.
posted to MetaTalk by cortex at 1:30 PM on March 20, 2015
MetaTalk post: Sixteen Years
"Friday night is my last hours of mod time, then I'm out!"

So be it. Set Friday night alight.
posted to MetaTalk by MiguelCardoso at 1:40 PM on March 5, 2015
Oh shit, retired tag, y'all
posted to MetaTalk by mathowie at 1:26 PM on March 4, 2015
MetaTalk post: Too Much False Rape?
The reason I left the site for a while was because it really seemed to be going downhill, feminism-wise, and it really seemed like the handful of misogynist voices who'd managed to avoid a ban, with TFB as one of the louder among their number, were able to dominate all of the discussions of women's issues of all kinds and make the site feel overwhelmingly unfriendly. The mod response to complaints was lackluster, I felt, and unhelpful. Between this and the general promise to relegate the kind of... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by NoraReed at 5:19 PM on February 25, 2015
MeFi post: "If you can move at a slow shamble, we can use you."
Character Z is just misunderstood.
posted to MetaFilter by naomialderman at 3:09 AM on February 18, 2015
MeFi post: 129 Situations
1.9. An avid birdwatcher sees an unexpected bird. Soon he's dead.

The bird knifed him

1.13. A man lies dead next to a cactus. Stuck to the cactus is a slip of paper.

the paper says "i knifed the cactus man. sincerely, The Bird"

1.25. A man is lying, dead, face down in the desert wearing a backpack.... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Greg Nog at 11:10 AM on February 12, 2015
MeFi post: Twitter aims for 1 in 20 tweets to be an advert
I block and report (and sometimes tell to fuck off) every single Promoted Tweet I see. If everyone did that, they would change their business model.

I just found out that replying to a promoted tweet, even just with heckling, costs the promoter between 50¢ and $5. Use that as you will.

Every time I see a promoted tweet, I just reply "no thanks".... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by alby at 10:00 AM on February 12, 2015
MetaTalk post: How you know you're living in a Mallory Ortberg Toast article
email saying I was a manipulative bullshitter who refuses to be honest with the community, etc.

how do you respond to the allegations that there are two cortexes - one who can never be honest, and one who can never lie

follow-up: you only can ask them one question to figure out which is which
posted to MetaTalk by Greg Nog at 1:27 PM on January 30, 2015
MetaTalk post: Threadshitting and Intolerance
When you frighten the pack of wolves they're going to attack.

wolves are known for attacking when frightened, leading to common phrases like "Red Riding Hood And The Big Scared Wolf" or "The Wolf At The Door, Having Social Anxiety About Whether To Come In"
posted to MetaTalk by Greg Nog at 10:39 AM on January 16, 2015
yeah maybe deciding to play the "I disagree with you so you're crazy" card is a bad idea, especially given our cultural history of calling uppity women insane and locking them up/drugging them into oblivion, and the fact that I talk about my mental health shit all the time on here. I'd like to invite anyone else who wants to try to use that as a club against me or anyone else to fuck themselves with a cactus
posted to MetaTalk by NoraReed at 10:09 AM on January 16, 2015
MeFi post: That is *not* Harley Quinn. Harley Quinn wears clothes.
oh hooray another man who is only finally able to understand feminism after having a daughter is coming to explain how terrible everything is to us. nerd culture edition!!!!

I mean, I guess I'm glad that these pieces exist because asshole misogynistic nerd men are a lot more likely to listen to other men than women, but "I finally understand a minuscule part of the effect that objectification and sexualization can have after having it explained to me by my... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by NoraReed at 2:37 AM on January 15, 2015
MetaTalk post: Threadshitting and Intolerance
Pretty much every time one of these articles gets posted (this is far from the first time), a comment like NoraReed's happens. Welcome to the background radiation of life on MetaFilter.

The comments are necessary because of the background radiation of life for women in the actual world.
posted to MetaTalk by poffin boffin at 12:35 PM on January 15, 2015
MetaTalk post: We're grownups, right?
you better tagline that shit I had to google the spelling
posted to MetaTalk by NoraReed at 4:38 PM on January 8, 2015
MeFi post: Didn't see this one coming!
Justice Department: You can grow/sell pot, but its gotta be on YOUR land.

Native Americans: So like.... anywhere in North America?
posted to MetaFilter by stinkfoot at 4:24 PM on December 11, 2014
MeFi post: The Illuminati Have A Website
Then they made it again as a trading card game, which admittedly wasn't a bad one for the genre. I haven't seen it since - I still feel like the original was the best card-based game I've ever played.

The trading card version was Illuminati: New World Order, which I always enjoyed for delving a bit more into specifics. In the original, you might have the UFOs controlling Junk Mail, which in turn controls the Mad Scientists or something. INWO had a... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by ricochet biscuit at 1:14 PM on November 21, 2014
Ask MeFi post: Deadpan absurdist comedy wanted
The recent A Touch of Cloth was basically Police Squad! done with the tropes of modern cop shows, or crap modern British cop shows at least. It's not as good, mind, but then what is?

Oh, and I guess The Day Today and Brass Eye would fit the bill too. Deadpan satire that veers off into surreal absurdity.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by sobarel at 4:31 AM on November 17, 2014 marked best answer
MeFi post: With Lars Von Trier as "Pie"
Any chance you could ask what the budget for a short like that is, and how long it took to make?

Yeah, and how many people were involved? Were... were there too many cooks?
posted to MetaFilter by naju at 4:43 PM on November 6, 2014
MeFi post: Drugs are Bad Part II
T.D. Strange: "More pro-tips from the indictement:
(1) don't email yourself links to the admin-only message board of your darknet drug market on your personal gmail account
(2) don't register your darknet drugmarket server under your own real name.
(3) don't appoint an undercover homeland security officer as your forum moderator

Hello new, edgy Ted Talk.
posted to MetaFilter by boo_radley at 1:19 PM on November 6, 2014
MeFi post: 10 hours of street harrassment, edited down to two minutes
What's her problem? Clearly they were just trying to talk to her about ethics in videogame journalism.
posted to MetaFilter by desjardins at 1:44 PM on October 28, 2014
MeFi post: 25 Years Later
David Lynch started out as a painter, and when he talks about film, he talks of it in terms of composition of light and sound, shaping themselves around ideas which must be depicted as honestly as possible. For all he is accused of woo and artsiness, he's the most craft-obsessed director I know of, more so even than Wes Anderson because he has no particular stylistic focus and his ideas seem far more shocking and original for the fact that they stand so perfectly alone.... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by rorgy at 1:18 PM on October 6, 2014
MeFi post: That’s true, that’s fine, but why can’t he relate to a white guy too?
I grew up with Speedy Gonzalez and his lazy, drunken cousin Slowpoke Rodriguez as the only characters that looked like me on children's television.

I totally value your actual point, but I'm also super amused by the idea that you're a mouse with a giant hat.
posted to MetaFilter by threeants at 9:32 AM on October 8, 2014
MeFi post: Intelligence X 100 =
Hmpf, Autechre: Flutter, how do you dance to that

With a lawyer and musicologist on hand, just like the packaging says.
posted to MetaFilter by aubilenon at 3:21 PM on September 23, 2014
MetaTalk post: You sound just like a _____!
I am still having to defend against the preconception that I don't mean exactly what I say.

You are the one who has raised time and again the suggestion that people here who call out bigotry are doing so disingenuously not because they feel marginalized or threatened or sickened by this bigotry but because they want favourites, or because they want to shut someone up for having a different opinion. Examine your own goddamn prejudices.
posted to MetaTalk by poffin boffin at 5:16 PM on September 11, 2014
MetaTalk post: How would you clone Metafilter? (kinda)
My guess is it's not pretty under the hood.

She may not look like much, but she's got it where it counts, kid. I've made a lot of special modifications myself.
posted to MetaTalk by pb at 9:59 AM on August 12, 2014
MeFi post: I'll do something else … Probably, I'm thinking, carpentry.
Gay host ... big move for US telly?

Bigger move for his wife Julia and son Max.
posted to MetaFilter by Ian A.T. at 12:00 PM on August 5, 2014
MeFi post: Uncontrolled Orbital Lizard Sex Satellite
This sounds to me like a case of.. ereptile dysfunction

*drops mic, leaves room*
posted to MetaFilter by phaedon at 9:58 AM on July 25, 2014
MeFi post: “I’m surprised that you’re offended.”
Could we, for once, drop the I-Just-Happen-To-Disagree-With-The-Methods-Women-Use-To-Critique-Patriarchy derail which occurs in every single conversation about women critiquing patriarchy?
posted to MetaFilter by shakespeherian at 3:46 PM on July 20, 2014
MeFi post: Happy Birthday, MetaFilter

Not while it's living under my roof it's not.
posted to MetaFilter by brundlefly at 9:23 AM on July 14, 2014
MeFi post: "Transformers 4: I am drunk and I must rage pee"
Very brave to shit on a Transformers review. They are just hilarious rants with mass appeal. It's not a crime to turn on your brain for 10 minutes once in a while.
posted to MetaFilter by straight at 6:44 AM on July 13, 2014
MeFi post: They're actually getting six seasons!
And what the hell is Yahoo Screen?

Where you go to watch Community, now.
posted to MetaFilter by ChurchHatesTucker at 3:25 PM on June 30, 2014
MetaTalk post: It's a bird...
Well Matt, if you're ever thinking about doing something thoughtful and generous with your own possessions ever again, please do check in with us first - we have literally thousands of threads' experience of being tedious, ignorant bores and we'd hate you to miss out on our irrelevant bullshit.
posted to MetaTalk by the quidnunc kid at 11:22 AM on June 25, 2014
MeFi post: Hate Man
I feel unnecessary.
posted to MetaFilter by eyeballkid at 4:00 PM on March 3, 2011
MeFi post: So, soccer....
i mean really who here HASN'T thrown darts at children when bored

no one that's who
posted to MetaFilter by elizardbits at 6:03 AM on June 19, 2014
MetaTalk post: Prepare to have thine mind blown : Mefi bookmarking
Well, we can't really take credit for it.

Yes you can.
posted to MetaTalk by vacapinta at 10:06 AM on June 18, 2014
MetaTalk post: Revisiting misogyny on Metafilter
I find the term "mansplaining" highly offensive. It's kind of like

Jesus fucking christ, dude. Put this down and walk away.
posted to MetaTalk by cortex at 1:28 PM on June 12, 2014
MeFi post: Thanks for nothing, jerkface
i totally have a hidden agenda and it's really annoying

i can't remember anything i am supposed to do can someone please find the agenda i hid

pretty sure i have missed at least 3 appointments
posted to MetaFilter by elizardbits at 1:37 PM on June 7, 2014
MeFi post: Alexander Shulgin: Godfather of psychedelics has died (1925-2014)
Thanks for 2C-B. Godspeed.
posted to MetaFilter by flabdablet at 11:46 PM on June 2, 2014
MeFi post: "50 Cent Believes In Us," I reassured her.
Pope Guilty, this is more about hitting that ramp in your mind space.
posted to MetaFilter by Gin and Comics at 11:17 AM on June 2, 2014
MeFi post: Free from Choice
It seemed a little primitive - like something an animal would do.

uh Rob you might want to sit down for this
posted to MetaFilter by solarion at 8:25 PM on May 29, 2014
I mean since when are people who would prefer a Lean Cuisine or whatever "foodies"

The advent of Soylent has devolved the definition of "foodies" to "people who eat food".
posted to MetaFilter by murphy slaw at 7:30 PM on May 29, 2014
MetaTalk post: Help Fund MetaFilter
I can almost not stand seeing you having to play boring grownup.

just yesterday he was all "lol butts" ... *sniff*
posted to MetaTalk by jessamyn at 5:02 PM on May 24, 2014
MetaTalk post: Metafilter SEO
Click the timestamp on the comment. That will give you a direct link to that comment but still within the context of the thread. Ideal for sharing, in my experience.

And, gosh, whose idea was that?
posted to MetaTalk by These Premises Are Alarmed at 1:31 PM on May 22, 2014
MeFi post: The Mother of All Self Links?
Metafilter’s most interesting core functions, like its discussion boards and Q&A feature, have since been cannibalized by more usable sites like Reddit and Quora.

Oh bless their hearts. I think they mean usable in the exploitable sense? My thesaurus says that is a synonym

Shit, even I donated. There's some magic here.
posted to MetaFilter by jessamyn at 3:08 PM on May 22, 2014
"its throwback interface"

it's called text you hapless gibbering app-fondling touchscreen cretin
posted to MetaFilter by elizardbits at 2:46 PM on May 22, 2014
MetaTalk post: Help Fund MetaFilter
Google should just BUY Metafilter, double everybody's pay, otherwise leave it alone, and use it as a control content set by which the authenticity of every other website can be judged.
posted to MetaTalk by stupidsexyFlanders at 7:07 AM on May 22, 2014
MetaTalk post: Where I'm off to
Pretty disgusting violation of site guidelines - and I, for one, think that this thread should be deleted with extreme prejudice.

This entire post is a blatant breach of the "no self linking" rule, which prohibiton includes linking to one's employer organisation. Once again the moderocracy of this website has failed utterly in its duty to protect its users from unwholesome blasphemies of our dearest and deepest principles.

It seems that... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by the quidnunc kid at 8:55 AM on May 20, 2014
MetaTalk post: State of MetaFilter
Although her consistent deletion of posts that didn't match her political views were silly.

Links or it didn't happen.
posted to MetaTalk by jessamyn at 3:08 PM on May 19, 2014
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