More specifically, Kelly Clarkson's "Since U Been Gone" sounds to my ears a lot like Taylor Swift's "You Belong With Me" ... The content is different, one's a breakup song and the other is aspirational but there's a mundane bouncy back-and-forth situation setting/listing of things to start and then there's a quick crescendo into the chorus. Is there a name for songs that work ...
posted to Ask MeFi by Roy Batty at 10:42 AM on April 3, 2024

The standard recommendation for chronically single people is to learn how to be happy alone, and to not wait for a partner to do things you want to do. But I already do the things I want to do, and never enjoy myself nearly as much as when I’m doing those things with a partner. In fact, when I’m single, the frequency/magnitude of my day-to-day life enjoyment is dramatically lower than when I’m ... when I break up with someone, which is what tends to happen, even once I’m over the grief of the breakup. In addition, I know a relationship isn’t a ...
posted to Ask MeFi by deus ex machina at 10:03 PM on June 20, 2021

How Cold Water Swimming Cured my Broken Heart. "When I am in the sea I am a mystery to myself. I have no idea how I got here, or why or what I am doing. I am only swimming and I am amazed." After a breakup and the death of her father a writer ended up living on the coast of Brittany in winter where she went for a daily swim in the icy sea.
posted to MeFi by storybored at 6:04 PM on April 16, 2021

I don't know if analyzing the situation threadbare with girlfriends would help, but I don't even have that option, so here I am. Would you have the conversation, or proceed straight to an amicable breakup? Would you wonder what's wrong with your choice of partner, or even your preferences? Sorry for the slightly ranty question, but details below the fold. I (F, mid thirties) met someone (M, ...
posted to Ask MeFi by Nieshka at 9:49 AM on February 10, 2021

I have a lot of love, and it wants to get out into the world. When I'm in a romantic relationship, my partner is by far my biggest source and destination for love. It feels wonderful, yet fragile, because so much happiness is dependent on one relationship. When I'm single, nothing comes close to relieving the pressure from the love that gets bottled up in me, or filling the void left by the ... of them, we both moved a little faster than we should have (no harm done though). I've initiated a breakup because of an incompatibility that came up ...
posted to Ask MeFi by gray17 at 8:35 PM on December 6, 2020

How to navigate early dating as an anxious person? Today a person I have been dating for a month told me she started seeing someone else and that there was something there she thought she wanted to pursue. She would also like to keep seeing me, though, but told me 'not to have any expectations'. I know this happens all the time, but I feel dejected. I had such high hopes and thought (and can't ... (keyword in HTML)
posted to Ask MeFi by Desertshore at 7:34 PM on November 30, 2020

We're both in our mid 30s. GF and I (male) always knew that our levels of physicality differed. At the beginning of our relationship, it didn't seem like an unfixable problem. Now, it's huge. She tends to (often, not always) find physical contact invasive - she's not really a hugger with her friends, accidental and benign contact with strangers or acquaintances is an irritant to her, and she's ... her, and I'm at a stage of my life where a longterm partner and stability are important to me. A breakup would be a heavy blow right now. I keep ...
posted to Ask MeFi by Anonymous at 3:26 AM on August 23, 2020

I feel extreme embarrassment and anxiety after some fairly harmless oversharing. There's the context of trauma though. Help me recover from this. It's been a year since I went through an pretty traumatic breakup with someone with some narcissistic tendencies (read: lying, gaslighting, unkindness, confusion). I was re-traumatized several times in the immediate aftermath when I indiscriminately ...
posted to Ask MeFi by miaow at 8:40 PM on August 1, 2020

I completely understand the general idea that you aren't responsible for someone else's feelings. But what about in an emotionally abusive intimate relationship, where the anger is a natural and righteous response to gas-lighting? More inside. I'm untangling lots of things in the aftermath of an emotionally abusive relationship with someone who was probably on the narcissistic spectrum. One of ... did, and he'd get even more defensive and use new age floaty stuff in his defense. Since the breakup, of course, I've had even more anger, and it ...
posted to Ask MeFi by miaow at 11:18 PM on July 23, 2020

The Great American Breakup Political scientist Louis Hartz accurately described the United States’ underlying cultural hyperindividualism. Is the next logical step the dissolution of the centralized federal state to become more like the EU? In which the author lays out a description of the American present: While our cities burn in America’s latest “race” riots, the COVID-19 death toll ...
posted to MeFi by Verg at 9:53 PM on June 3, 2020

Discomfort with dating a very different type of person, or red flags, or something else? My last (and most significant) relationship ended a little over a year ago, and I've been dating quite a bit for the past 9-10 months. I'm a female in my mid-30s and most of my previous partners and dates are science- and engineer-types, ranging from their mid-20s to early 40s. The current man I'm dating ... on and off over the last 10 years and have benefited a lot from all of it. I processed my last breakup in therapy for about 6 months. I currently ...
posted to Ask MeFi by mild deer at 4:49 PM on February 19, 2020

Mashable's series on digital dating. Jims looking for Pams, post-breakup pet custody and the glory days of Missed Connections. Here are the worst online dating behaviors and the "superfluous words we invented along the way to cope with the indignity of it all."
posted to MeFi by storytam at 10:35 AM on February 14, 2020

I have a history of serial monogamy - some successful, some not so successful. I seem to find it easy to fall into relationships, sometimes with fantastic people that for whatever reason it didn't work out with, and sometimes with people who are so clearly ill-suited to me that I have obviously been shaping myself around them like a pretzel - which I don't realise till it falls apart and I realise ... / starting to look around for men whilst going through the acute withdrawal stage (2 weeks after a breakup) by telling me why this will be good for me, ...
posted to Ask MeFi by starstarstar at 9:31 AM on February 12, 2020

This is long, so just jump to the extended explanation if you've got a warm cup of tea in hand and some time. TLDR: new relationship after disastrous end to old relationship, pouring anxiety into age gap, that's a red herring, tell me what my brain is doing (and why?)? Someone talk me through this. It's long, but I want to give some context.  I'm a woman in my late 30s. Recently finished a very ... tremendous love but also a lot of unhealthy dynamics. I was extra-pathetic for a while after the breakup, told my ex repeatedly I wanted him back, he ...
posted to Ask MeFi by Anonymous at 8:46 AM on December 6, 2019

Inspired by penguin pie's comment yesterday, realized I resuse AskMetafilter answers. Selections from my Ask answer rotations: The poem The Sentence by Anna Akhmatova (1, 2, 3) James Turrell's House of Light in Niigata, Japan (1, 2) Kate Harding's essay The Fantasy of Being Thin (1, 2) The Wadi Shab hiking trail in Oman (1, 2) What are your best on-rotation answers? *never ... (keyword in HTML)
posted to MetaTalk by BusyBusyBusy at 6:59 AM on May 1, 2019

I broke up with my girlfriend of nearly a year last night. We're 27. This was my first relationship, this was her severalth. I still love her, and she wanted to make things work still, but I didn't. I don't know if I made the right decision. I have a million questions, but the one I wanted to ask first was helping processing two things. (1) This sensation of "remembering the future that I will not ... (keyword in HTML)
posted to Ask MeFi by Anonymous at 3:32 AM on February 28, 2019

I've had a really rough couple of years, and spent 2016-2018 recovering from a confluence of events that entailed a layoff, a hostile roommate situation and a breakup, followed up by a plus-yearlong spell of unemployment, depression and what I now realize was an abusive relationship. And for about six weeks or so in the very last bit of 2018, I was incandescently happy with someone who broke ...
posted to Ask MeFi by blue rare at 4:04 PM on January 20, 2019

What movies have helped you deal with a breakup? I'm going through a tough separation with an all-around uncertain future. I have found that a couple of "realistic" or at least sort of "insightful" breakup movies have helped. By this I mean movies in which the titular couple don't necessarily get back together, though a general sense of optimism is definitely happening. ...
posted to Ask MeFi by cmoj at 7:22 AM on January 17, 2019

I just had a shitty breakup, and I don't survive post break-ups well. But the Hive is full of wise loving people who give good advice, so please share all the good Ask threads and comments you've seen and loved. I know ya'll have good things stashed away in your favorites.
posted to MetaTalk by Grandysaur at 1:45 AM on January 13, 2019

I was unceremoniously dumped just before the holidays by the person I thought I'd marry. After a decade of putting the needs of my partners first and my own needs second, I've vowed to spend 2019 getting to know myself better. In particular, I want to get past the mental hurtle that I can't do certain things (like travel, or buy my own house) without a partner. Please give me your best ... or Australia). All suggestions and advice welcome. I'm trying to react to this significant breakup with optimism and hope, but it requires a huge ...
posted to Ask MeFi by tealcoffeecup at 7:51 AM on December 26, 2018