The length does not arrive the half-inch

November 14, 2006 1:56 PM

The Portraits of 42 American Presidents from Washington to Bush on a half inch strand of Black human hair is merely one of the World Art Miracles you'll find at worldartmiracle.com, the homepage of one Jin Y.H., micro artist. The site is also noticeable for some delicious Engrish phrases, such as "The length does not arrive the half-inch" and "The microscope descends to take the work."
posted by jonson (20 comments total)

Yeah, I saw these at this really high-end gallery in SoHo once. I started bitching because I was all like, ewwww, there is a totally gross long black hair on this mellon ball wrapped in prosciutto and the gallery owner started freaking out. The portrait of "42 composers who wrote great works of artistic musical for piano compositions" started running (from the melon juice) all over the meat-- but you really couldn't see that without a microscope. My friend blew the hair off and ate the appetizer, paint and all. She said it tasted like chicken.
posted by TweetleBeetleBattleBookie at 2:15 PM on November 14, 2006 [1 favorite]

^^^^
This is why we can't have nice things.
posted by found missing at 2:32 PM on November 14, 2006

Their marketing department is working on an "Inferiority Complex" paintbrush which ships with the entire contents of the Louvre painstakingly re-created on the hairs of the brush.
posted by FYKshun at 2:36 PM on November 14, 2006

Uhhh... This entire sentence is actually written on the flagella of a spermatozoa; magnified a billion times. No really, it is, honest!
posted by wumpus at 2:47 PM on November 14, 2006

My mail carrier just delivered the Christmas 2006 Lillian Vernan catologue, and the entire thing was printed on the eyelash of a humminbird!
Well, that's what he said, anyway. I think he expects a tip this year.
posted by maryh at 2:57 PM on November 14, 2006

I never realized that Fonzie was the 11th president!

Seriously, this is pretty neat, even by microart standards.
posted by TedW at 3:04 PM on November 14, 2006

Is it just the hair that's black, or the person it came from too? Why the heck does the ethnicity of the person the hair came from matter?
posted by Sukiari at 3:25 PM on November 14, 2006

What I don't get is how you paint on a hair. With a hair I get, but what the heck is fine enough to paint that kind of detail with?
posted by GuyZero at 3:27 PM on November 14, 2006

I think there's some lice shampoo at the pharmacy that will wash that Bush right outta your hair.
posted by Liquidwolf at 3:48 PM on November 14, 2006

I wonder, just how many native English speakers put perfect, unbroken Asian language translations on their web pages?

Is it just the hair that's black, or the person it came from too? Why the heck does the ethnicity of the person the hair came from matter?

Black refers to the color of the hair. I think the color of the hair matters because it forms the background for the portraits.
posted by Pollomacho at 5:11 PM on November 14, 2006

I wonder, just how many native English speakers put perfect, unbroken Asian language translations on their web pages?

That is not the point.

This, I believe is the point -
"Clicking the picture appreciates 42 American president's works"

hm, I better not click the picture
posted by bobobox at 5:31 PM on November 14, 2006

Don't get me wrong, I get to enjoy delicious engrish on a daily basis (I've even sent in a couple of beauties to the website). I just want to make sure people keep it in perspective that at least they are trying, much more than we can say for ourselves.
posted by Pollomacho at 5:43 PM on November 14, 2006

Oh, and anything that can appreciate the level of lousy work they've done so far is a good thing in my book!
posted by Pollomacho at 5:45 PM on November 14, 2006

Does this mean that the proverb will have to be rewritten? And if so, will more camels be entering the kingdom of God?
posted by rob511 at 7:14 PM on November 14, 2006

This page doesn't seem to be linked from the English index page. It says the artist was commissioned to make a miniature portrait of the king of Brunei as his birthday present in 1990.
You guys should feel free to make fun of the engrish there, since they are not that coherent in Chinese either.
posted by of strange foe at 8:02 PM on November 14, 2006

Does this mean that the proverb will have to be rewritten?

Picture of a camel ready to pass through the Eye of the Needle as referred to by Jeebus.
posted by Pollomacho at 8:47 PM on November 14, 2006

George H.W. Bush is president number 41, George W. Bush is president number 43...

Which president failed to make the cut on the strand of hair?
posted by crashlanding at 11:05 PM on November 14, 2006

Which president failed to make the cut on the strand of hair?

Grover Cleveland is only portrayed once.
posted by Pollomacho at 12:08 AM on November 15, 2006

no matter how small all this is, these paintings suck. big time.
posted by ouke at 4:06 PM on November 15, 2006

Those portraits are UNGODLY UGLY. Well, except Bush Jr. They pretty much nailed that one.
posted by tehloki at 10:38 PM on November 15, 2006