Reunited
August 19, 2017 5:39 PM Subscribe
For families divided by the U.S./Mexico border, there is one place where they are allowed to come together - almost.
"Later I would think about how easy it was for me to exercise both sides of my identity like this—and how my mother, who received citizenship in the Reagan administration amnesty of 1986, was able to return home that same night, to watch the Tijuana evening news from the comfort of her living room in San Diego. There are so many families for which this isn’t true. Maybe certain loved ones have crossed illegally or overstayed a visa, and now are forced to remain in place as they await citizenship papers. Maybe relatives in Mexico cannot visit because they have been denied a tourist visa or do not have the means to travel. Or maybe a family member has been deported, with no way to re-enter...That’s a lot of separated families—roughly the population of Austin or San Francisco. And the one place where any of them have a hope of seeing each other again is Friendship Park.
To enter this impersonal and fortified space, under the watchful gaze of border sentries and cameras, is to willingly lay yourself bare: your love, your longing, your pain. And yet that vulnerability only gets you so close. The intimacies you crave—to smell your daughter’s hair, to squeeze your father’s hand—are impossible. All the questions you have, accumulated over years, are unanswerable in a mere few minutes. And those minutes are precious, so instead you search for your loved one’s eyes through the tiny gaps in that mesh. You smile wide so he or she can see. Here you are at last, face to face, but not together."
"Later I would think about how easy it was for me to exercise both sides of my identity like this—and how my mother, who received citizenship in the Reagan administration amnesty of 1986, was able to return home that same night, to watch the Tijuana evening news from the comfort of her living room in San Diego. There are so many families for which this isn’t true. Maybe certain loved ones have crossed illegally or overstayed a visa, and now are forced to remain in place as they await citizenship papers. Maybe relatives in Mexico cannot visit because they have been denied a tourist visa or do not have the means to travel. Or maybe a family member has been deported, with no way to re-enter...That’s a lot of separated families—roughly the population of Austin or San Francisco. And the one place where any of them have a hope of seeing each other again is Friendship Park.
To enter this impersonal and fortified space, under the watchful gaze of border sentries and cameras, is to willingly lay yourself bare: your love, your longing, your pain. And yet that vulnerability only gets you so close. The intimacies you crave—to smell your daughter’s hair, to squeeze your father’s hand—are impossible. All the questions you have, accumulated over years, are unanswerable in a mere few minutes. And those minutes are precious, so instead you search for your loved one’s eyes through the tiny gaps in that mesh. You smile wide so he or she can see. Here you are at last, face to face, but not together."
should have autoplay music and annoying af scrolling warning, tho
posted by scruss at 8:20 AM on August 20, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by scruss at 8:20 AM on August 20, 2017 [1 favorite]
Doesn't happen when viewed on phone.
posted by jenfullmoon at 9:09 AM on August 20, 2017
posted by jenfullmoon at 9:09 AM on August 20, 2017
YES. This was written by a high school friend of mine, and it just goes to show how different lives can be in the borderlands.
posted by mynameisluka at 10:52 AM on August 20, 2017
posted by mynameisluka at 10:52 AM on August 20, 2017
(Different as in: It couldn't be more different than my experience growing up, and shows in many ways how San Diego preserves some forms of segregation and how border politics influence our public spaces.)
posted by mynameisluka at 10:53 AM on August 20, 2017
posted by mynameisluka at 10:53 AM on August 20, 2017
It's amazing how much damage a culture of irrational xenophobia can do. Approximately zero terrorist attackers in the US crossed the border illegally.
To guard against this non-existent threat, families amounting to the population of Austin, are separated for ever.
When did we become such craven cowards?
"May there never be a wall between these two great nations, only friendship,” Pat Nixon.
posted by monotreme at 7:36 PM on August 20, 2017 [2 favorites]
To guard against this non-existent threat, families amounting to the population of Austin, are separated for ever.
When did we become such craven cowards?
"May there never be a wall between these two great nations, only friendship,” Pat Nixon.
posted by monotreme at 7:36 PM on August 20, 2017 [2 favorites]
The text says, "To reach the plaza, visitors had to ride in a shuttle for about a mile over a largely submerged mud lane. "
It's even worse now. For most of the year, the road is closed to vehicles due to flooding. At least, that's what the signs say. You soon get the idea that it's a lie, especially when it hasn't rained for months. You have to walk from a gravel parking lot a mile or more to the American side of Friendship Park. Sometimes part of the road itself is closed, so you have to do part of the walk on the beach, on the sand, which is harder. You'll see entire families, all ages, walking that mile, carrying food, folding chairs, babies, whatever they need to spend some time there.
Be sure to watch the documentary. The border wall is actually two tall fences with a stretch of land in between. On certain days, the US government opens the US fence so you can go right up to the Mexican fence. That fence is a tight, sturdy mesh. You can put a pinky through, maybe, but you're not supposed to. The scene where they let people go a bit further down to where there is a larger gap in the vertical posts is rare and not necessarily an improvement. You can see better, but you cannot whisper through that fence because you are ten feet away. The mesh is closer but the view is more difficult.
On some days, there are cross-border religious services. Other days, there are men right on the Mexican side playing music, with people on the US sitting in folding chairs listening thoughtfully.
Almost everyone on both sides is a Spanish-speaker.
On the Mexican side is a stadium. And just beyond that, houses and apartment buildings and stores.
The American side is good. It's a park and bird refuge. It's a striking coastal landscape.
But you can't help but feeling that the border should be open so that people can shake hands and hug and kiss each other.
posted by Mo Nickels at 2:08 PM on August 21, 2017 [1 favorite]
It's even worse now. For most of the year, the road is closed to vehicles due to flooding. At least, that's what the signs say. You soon get the idea that it's a lie, especially when it hasn't rained for months. You have to walk from a gravel parking lot a mile or more to the American side of Friendship Park. Sometimes part of the road itself is closed, so you have to do part of the walk on the beach, on the sand, which is harder. You'll see entire families, all ages, walking that mile, carrying food, folding chairs, babies, whatever they need to spend some time there.
Be sure to watch the documentary. The border wall is actually two tall fences with a stretch of land in between. On certain days, the US government opens the US fence so you can go right up to the Mexican fence. That fence is a tight, sturdy mesh. You can put a pinky through, maybe, but you're not supposed to. The scene where they let people go a bit further down to where there is a larger gap in the vertical posts is rare and not necessarily an improvement. You can see better, but you cannot whisper through that fence because you are ten feet away. The mesh is closer but the view is more difficult.
On some days, there are cross-border religious services. Other days, there are men right on the Mexican side playing music, with people on the US sitting in folding chairs listening thoughtfully.
Almost everyone on both sides is a Spanish-speaker.
On the Mexican side is a stadium. And just beyond that, houses and apartment buildings and stores.
The American side is good. It's a park and bird refuge. It's a striking coastal landscape.
But you can't help but feeling that the border should be open so that people can shake hands and hug and kiss each other.
posted by Mo Nickels at 2:08 PM on August 21, 2017 [1 favorite]
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posted by Secretariat at 7:15 AM on August 20, 2017