It'll Kentucky-Fry Your Mind!
September 29, 2009 11:02 AM Subscribe
The drop pod sequence made no sense. Why were there no decoy pods or flare/chaff-type countermeasures?
posted by jedicus at 11:26 AM on September 29, 2009
posted by jedicus at 11:26 AM on September 29, 2009
I like how, of all the questions a person could possibly have about what we just saw, you chose to question the drop pod sequence.
I love it!
posted by orville sash at 11:31 AM on September 29, 2009 [2 favorites]
I love it!
posted by orville sash at 11:31 AM on September 29, 2009 [2 favorites]
This film reminded me of my day thus far.
posted by dortmunder at 11:36 AM on September 29, 2009
posted by dortmunder at 11:36 AM on September 29, 2009
The Wikipedia article....well, it would be an exaggeration to say it explains much of anything, but there it is.
posted by jedicus at 11:41 AM on September 29, 2009
posted by jedicus at 11:41 AM on September 29, 2009
Also, what's with the Japanese fascination with Colonel Sanders? I recall he turned up as a supernatural figure in Murakami's Kafka on the Shore.
posted by dortmunder at 11:44 AM on September 29, 2009
posted by dortmunder at 11:44 AM on September 29, 2009
That was a commercial, right?
posted by christhelongtimelurker at 11:45 AM on September 29, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by christhelongtimelurker at 11:45 AM on September 29, 2009 [1 favorite]
43 years in the future and KFC has it's own quasi-religious space military force with orbital drop mech troopers defending a burnt wasteland shrine to the Colonel from giant sand worms. Fine, but we can all agree that drop pod sequence was terrible, right?
posted by rainman84 at 11:47 AM on September 29, 2009
posted by rainman84 at 11:47 AM on September 29, 2009
A sixteen quadrillion yen mech-suit and you've equipped it with halberd and a light submachine gun? That's less effective than a foot soldier's grenade launcher?
posted by boo_radley at 11:47 AM on September 29, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by boo_radley at 11:47 AM on September 29, 2009 [1 favorite]
If I were to start with some sort of marketable movie premise, I would undoubtedly start with hot Japanese women shooting guns. That would be in there 100% of the time. On the other hand, irrationally violent and artistically acrobatic sand worms would tie with flying chicken drop pods at appearing less than 1% of the time.
I'm not going to even mention the possibility of including Kevin Bacon.
posted by jimmythefish at 11:48 AM on September 29, 2009 [1 favorite]
I'm not going to even mention the possibility of including Kevin Bacon.
posted by jimmythefish at 11:48 AM on September 29, 2009 [1 favorite]
So, the spice in the secret recipe is melange, then?
posted by nzero at 11:53 AM on September 29, 2009 [2 favorites]
posted by nzero at 11:53 AM on September 29, 2009 [2 favorites]
Also, "What wrong wit you, I say you he dead!" "IS THE COLONEL IN?"
posted by nzero at 11:54 AM on September 29, 2009
posted by nzero at 11:54 AM on September 29, 2009
Okay, so this is one part of a collection of vignettes called Shin-Onna Tachiguishi Retsuden (The True-Female Amazing Lives of Fast Food Grifters). This is actually a sequel to Onna Tachiguishi-Retsuden (Female Fast Food Grifter: Foxy Croquette O-Gin ~Struggle to Death in Palestine~). This is in turn related to Tachiguishi-Retsuden, the original fast food grifter movie.
The whole thing is an offshoot of the Kerberos Saga, which is a collection of related works in various media (manga, radio dramas, anime, etc). The tachiguishi or 'fast food grifters' are secondary characters in the Kerberos Saga. The various tachiguishi are characters emblematic of a kind of fast food, but their stories are told in this military science fiction universe.
So: "As [fast food] professionals, one of the tachiguishi privileges is to eat in stand-and-eat street restaurants without paying. In the movie, Mamoru Oshii describes these characters as "glorified maverick heroes who have carved their names in the history of dietary culture, sometimes accused of destroying the public order or simply dismissed of being pure fiction". All Tachiguishi names are connected to a specific dinner, which is related to a Japanese culinary era from the '40s its traditional food (月見 or "moongaze", raw egg) up to the 2000s and the americanized fast food ("hamburger")."
Basically, Assault Girl is the short story of the Kentucky Fried Chicken tachiguishi, as set within the Kerberos Saga universe. Wow, what a rabbit hole trip that was.
posted by jedicus at 11:55 AM on September 29, 2009 [15 favorites]
The whole thing is an offshoot of the Kerberos Saga, which is a collection of related works in various media (manga, radio dramas, anime, etc). The tachiguishi or 'fast food grifters' are secondary characters in the Kerberos Saga. The various tachiguishi are characters emblematic of a kind of fast food, but their stories are told in this military science fiction universe.
So: "As [fast food] professionals, one of the tachiguishi privileges is to eat in stand-and-eat street restaurants without paying. In the movie, Mamoru Oshii describes these characters as "glorified maverick heroes who have carved their names in the history of dietary culture, sometimes accused of destroying the public order or simply dismissed of being pure fiction". All Tachiguishi names are connected to a specific dinner, which is related to a Japanese culinary era from the '40s its traditional food (月見 or "moongaze", raw egg) up to the 2000s and the americanized fast food ("hamburger")."
Basically, Assault Girl is the short story of the Kentucky Fried Chicken tachiguishi, as set within the Kerberos Saga universe. Wow, what a rabbit hole trip that was.
posted by jedicus at 11:55 AM on September 29, 2009 [15 favorites]
Yeah, I'm sure these women eat a lot of fast food. Judging by their excellent physiques and athletic prowess, it probably makes up pretty much their entire diet.
posted by gurple at 11:57 AM on September 29, 2009
posted by gurple at 11:57 AM on September 29, 2009
Basically, Assault Girl is the short story of the Kentucky Fried Chicken tachiguishi, as set within the Kerberos Saga universe.
You have achieved the perfect Zen balance of helpful and non-helpful within these sentences.
posted by GuyZero at 11:59 AM on September 29, 2009 [12 favorites]
You have achieved the perfect Zen balance of helpful and non-helpful within these sentences.
posted by GuyZero at 11:59 AM on September 29, 2009 [12 favorites]
> That was a commercial, right?
Yes. For a de-worming service. They're expensive, though. Also, for payment they only take statues and empty KFC buckets. On the bright side the statues don't have to be in good condition and they'll do work in war zones.
posted by tarheelcoxn at 12:04 PM on September 29, 2009 [1 favorite]
Yes. For a de-worming service. They're expensive, though. Also, for payment they only take statues and empty KFC buckets. On the bright side the statues don't have to be in good condition and they'll do work in war zones.
posted by tarheelcoxn at 12:04 PM on September 29, 2009 [1 favorite]
I don't know what any of this is, but I know it beats the hell out of lobster bisque and a telephone that sings only lullabies.
That's right, I don't know what that means either.
Lastly, there has to be a doctoral paper out there somewhere about the use of wind in martial movies set in Japan.
posted by From Bklyn at 12:06 PM on September 29, 2009 [1 favorite]
That's right, I don't know what that means either.
Lastly, there has to be a doctoral paper out there somewhere about the use of wind in martial movies set in Japan.
posted by From Bklyn at 12:06 PM on September 29, 2009 [1 favorite]
From Bklyn has just given me my new procrastinatory mission: find (and FPP) that paper.
posted by Alterscape at 12:37 PM on September 29, 2009
posted by Alterscape at 12:37 PM on September 29, 2009
GuyZero: "You have achieved the perfect Zen balance of helpful and non-helpful within these sentences"
Technically accurate and functionally useless, as we tell our consultants.
posted by boo_radley at 12:59 PM on September 29, 2009
Technically accurate and functionally useless, as we tell our consultants.
posted by boo_radley at 12:59 PM on September 29, 2009
Whenever there's a post like this, where the post text itself is fairly simple and not revealing but then the comments are very bizarre, I always had this sneaking suspicion that I've stumbled upon Metafilter performance art. As if the first commenter had thought of something really outrageous to say not at all related to the link, like "I really enjoyed the sequence with the lobsters with guns and lederhosen and the Michael Nyman music" and then everyone else is just playing along.
I feel like I'm in a weird Schrodinger's cat kind of situation where maybe the link really does lead to something as awesomely strange as it sounds from reading your comments, and maybe it's all an elaborate hoax and it's Rick Astley. Until I click, maybe it's simultaneously both and neither.
Or something.
Maybe I'll come back in a couple of hours and click the link.
posted by marginaliana at 1:24 PM on September 29, 2009 [1 favorite]
I feel like I'm in a weird Schrodinger's cat kind of situation where maybe the link really does lead to something as awesomely strange as it sounds from reading your comments, and maybe it's all an elaborate hoax and it's Rick Astley. Until I click, maybe it's simultaneously both and neither.
Or something.
Maybe I'll come back in a couple of hours and click the link.
posted by marginaliana at 1:24 PM on September 29, 2009 [1 favorite]
tr0nb0y (1 day ago)
This is like if Frank Hurbert's Dune met KFC and had a baby.
The Spice on Arrakis is the crucial ingredient for KFC fried chicken but supply is limited by the ruling power hungry regime. Kentucky warriors struggle against this regime with the belief that The Colonel will come, in accordance to the prophecy, and lead them to affordable priced, perfectly spiced fried chicken across the galaxy.
Best. Youtube. Comment. Ever.
posted by lyam at 1:48 PM on September 29, 2009 [3 favorites]
This is like if Frank Hurbert's Dune met KFC and had a baby.
The Spice on Arrakis is the crucial ingredient for KFC fried chicken but supply is limited by the ruling power hungry regime. Kentucky warriors struggle against this regime with the belief that The Colonel will come, in accordance to the prophecy, and lead them to affordable priced, perfectly spiced fried chicken across the galaxy.
Best. Youtube. Comment. Ever.
posted by lyam at 1:48 PM on September 29, 2009 [3 favorites]
She has the greasy fingers of the Ibad!
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 1:58 PM on September 29, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 1:58 PM on September 29, 2009 [1 favorite]
The spacing guild would fit the stereotype of the Unix wizard pretty well if that were the case.
posted by sonic meat machine at 4:26 PM on September 29, 2009
posted by sonic meat machine at 4:26 PM on September 29, 2009
Oshii <3<3
I'm going to go watch The Sky Crawlers for like the eleventyith time
posted by The Devil Tesla at 12:44 AM on September 30, 2009
I'm going to go watch The Sky Crawlers for like the eleventyith time
posted by The Devil Tesla at 12:44 AM on September 30, 2009
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2. The dragon-eel fight was like something from Final Fantasy. Her shots sort of flashed when they hit it, but caused no visible wounds, so I assume that on the other side of the dragon-eel a number popped up indicating how much damage she did. It ran away, but I assume that once she inflicts damage equal to its hitpoints it will just dissolve away.
posted by Caduceus at 11:22 AM on September 29, 2009