Making Weight
June 4, 2015 6:03 AM Subscribe
I'm fat," Daniel P. Finney wrote in an April 12 column in the Des Moines Register. "Scratch that. I'm morbidly obese." Finney, the Register's Metro Voice columnist, was 39 years old and weighed more than 500 pounds. Facing excruciating pain, type II diabetes, and concern that he would soon lose the ability to walk, he decided to make a serious effort to lose weight. He has been chronicling that effort in a blog, Making Weight.
Much of his blog is about the nuts and bolts of his weight-loss program, but Finney, who has used his columns to discuss mental health stigma and his own and his family's struggles with mental illness, also talks about how his attempts to lose weight are complicated by anxiety, depression, stigma and shame.
Much of his blog is about the nuts and bolts of his weight-loss program, but Finney, who has used his columns to discuss mental health stigma and his own and his family's struggles with mental illness, also talks about how his attempts to lose weight are complicated by anxiety, depression, stigma and shame.
Good luck Daniel. I'm wit ya, man.
posted by GallonOfAlan at 6:21 AM on June 4, 2015
posted by GallonOfAlan at 6:21 AM on June 4, 2015
I've lost 65 lbs since Thanksgiving and I'm targeting 85. I've tried to diet my whole life and what turned out to work for me was unrelenting emotional stress. I wish I could recommend my "secret" and I guess I'm healthier and all, but man.
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 6:57 AM on June 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 6:57 AM on June 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
I love to hear about how people face their own personal struggles, so I'll be following this blog. Thanks for the post!
posted by xingcat at 8:24 AM on June 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by xingcat at 8:24 AM on June 4, 2015 [1 favorite]
what turned out to work for me was unrelenting emotional stress.
Yup. That's called the Trauma Diet.
posted by grumpybear69 at 8:52 AM on June 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
Yup. That's called the Trauma Diet.
posted by grumpybear69 at 8:52 AM on June 4, 2015 [3 favorites]
Yeah - I keep knowing I need to do something and of course, the longer you go on, the harder it is to do something about it, but ugh...
I totally feel that 156 ft walk thingy. If I had the money - I'd hire a "Drill Sergeant" to come kick my ass and get me in the habit so over time I wouldn't need him. But I'm not wealthy, and willpower ... I suck at it.
Best of luck to him.
posted by symbioid at 1:27 PM on June 4, 2015
I totally feel that 156 ft walk thingy. If I had the money - I'd hire a "Drill Sergeant" to come kick my ass and get me in the habit so over time I wouldn't need him. But I'm not wealthy, and willpower ... I suck at it.
Best of luck to him.
posted by symbioid at 1:27 PM on June 4, 2015
Hey, the Trauma Diet! I've been getting questions and I tell some people vaguely "oh I eat lots of apples and walk a lot" but the truth is "Get divorced and work two jobs while keeping your shit together for your kids, and discover that you have lost 15 years of weight in six months, basically returning to the same size you were on your wedding day as the divorce day approaches, because crying and screaming silently burns a lot of calories."
I loved his bit about being able to walk 40 laps and learning not to hurt himself pushing too far, learning to be kind when his mind was telling himself to be cruel and despair. That's so hard.
posted by dorothyisunderwood at 6:57 PM on June 4, 2015 [4 favorites]
I loved his bit about being able to walk 40 laps and learning not to hurt himself pushing too far, learning to be kind when his mind was telling himself to be cruel and despair. That's so hard.
posted by dorothyisunderwood at 6:57 PM on June 4, 2015 [4 favorites]
Oh, and speaking of airplanes: Forget it. I'm too fat to fly. I don't know if an airline would force me to buy a second seat, but I'm not taking the chance.This. Last time I flew on a plane was in 2003. I was stuck in a middle seat between two guys who were big but not a big as me. There was no way that the armrests were going down, so I spent about 4 hours squished against them, which made none of us happy.
My work wanted me to fly from Indianapolis to Cleveland in 2008. I drove. Seven hours through some of the least interesting scenery in the country, but there was no way that I was going to go through that humiliation again.
At work, we briskly walk a mile around the office park every afternoon. The first time I tried it, I finished, but I thought I was going to die. I was barely able to play it off like I was totally fine in front of my coworkers, to whom a mile walk was nothing. I've stuck with it and can keep up pretty comfortably now (when my knees don't act up), though that alone isn't going to get rid of the 125 or so pounds I need to lose. I've gained another 20 pounds since I quit smoking in November. It's time to start working on that now that I'm long past the nicotine withdrawal.
This is a good story about someone doing the very difficult work of losing a lot of weight. I'm glad none of the fat haters have shown up to tell us how terrible we are for not being thin and fit like they are. Or offering helpful advice like "eat less". Hopefully they will leave this post alone because I'm sick of hearing it.
posted by double block and bleed at 7:07 PM on June 4, 2015 [4 favorites]
I'm having a pretty bad day as regards my own exercise program - it's not as intensely managed as ITFA, but there's parallels. So I'm getting smacked right in the feels here. It's a brave thing to do this publicly, especially the way larger people can be harassed and shamed on the web (as double block and bleed notes above). So power to you, Daniel P. Finney. You make your life what you want it to be.
And if anyone fancies it, maybe there's some way we can have a positive space for MeFites who are doing their 'difficult work of losing weight' (great phrasing, btw) - however, wherever, no shaming, no blaming...
posted by prismatic7 at 12:34 AM on June 5, 2015 [6 favorites]
And if anyone fancies it, maybe there's some way we can have a positive space for MeFites who are doing their 'difficult work of losing weight' (great phrasing, btw) - however, wherever, no shaming, no blaming...
posted by prismatic7 at 12:34 AM on June 5, 2015 [6 favorites]
All I have to say about this is that offices are the worst; it's always somebody's birthday or fucking Donut Day (today) or some shit and thin people always bring that stuff in and I just want to scream and throw it out the window. I am having a hard enough time, do you fucking mind NOT BRINGING THAT SHIT INTO A PLACE I CANNOT LEAVE, jesus.
What good does it do to clean out your cabinets and fridge and not go to places that will tempt you if every day it's a fucking sugar-orgy in your office? And if you say anything, well, you're being the asshole.
We eat too much goddamn sugar in this country and it's fucking everywhere.
Basically I'm posting this to say; if you have a leftover cake at home, please just throw it away. Someone in your office is on a diet and could really use a break. Bring fruit or something if you are driven to share food.
posted by emjaybee at 10:49 AM on June 5, 2015 [2 favorites]
What good does it do to clean out your cabinets and fridge and not go to places that will tempt you if every day it's a fucking sugar-orgy in your office? And if you say anything, well, you're being the asshole.
We eat too much goddamn sugar in this country and it's fucking everywhere.
Basically I'm posting this to say; if you have a leftover cake at home, please just throw it away. Someone in your office is on a diet and could really use a break. Bring fruit or something if you are driven to share food.
posted by emjaybee at 10:49 AM on June 5, 2015 [2 favorites]
(I say this as a morbidly obese dude, myself, wasn't mocking your idea of a mefi-safespace subsite)
posted by symbioid at 12:04 PM on June 5, 2015
posted by symbioid at 12:04 PM on June 5, 2015
emjaybee: "All I have to say about this is that offices are the worst; it's always somebody's birthday or fucking Donut Day (today) or some shit and thin people always bring that stuff in and I just want to scream and throw it out the window. I am having a hard enough time, do you fucking mind NOT BRINGING THAT SHIT INTO A PLACE I CANNOT LEAVE, jesus."
I used to sit at a desk that was an extension of a common-area countertop. (it's hard to explain) That's where all of the goodies were placed. Every day, there were cookies, donuts, cake, pie, candy, or some other kind of high-calorie treat literally within easy reach. Sometimes I had to move them so I wouldn't bump them with my mouse! I changed desks, but I was still pretty close. So I suggested that we put all that stuff in the break room instead, pointing out that we didn't want to get ants or worse in our work area. That actually worked, for the most part. Now I just stay out of the break room.
posted by double block and bleed at 2:06 PM on June 5, 2015 [1 favorite]
I used to sit at a desk that was an extension of a common-area countertop. (it's hard to explain) That's where all of the goodies were placed. Every day, there were cookies, donuts, cake, pie, candy, or some other kind of high-calorie treat literally within easy reach. Sometimes I had to move them so I wouldn't bump them with my mouse! I changed desks, but I was still pretty close. So I suggested that we put all that stuff in the break room instead, pointing out that we didn't want to get ants or worse in our work area. That actually worked, for the most part. Now I just stay out of the break room.
posted by double block and bleed at 2:06 PM on June 5, 2015 [1 favorite]
Gah the late night hunger / anxiety / boredom stuff is definitely what gets me. I'd be doing pretty damn well nutritionally if I could somehow manage to not consume any food or drink past 10pm reliably.
posted by Theta States at 2:31 PM on June 8, 2015
posted by Theta States at 2:31 PM on June 8, 2015
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