Never too late for some holiday cooking tips

January 2, 2018 2:17 PM

Cooking With Your Mouth | Christmas Turkey (SLYT)
posted by mandolin conspiracy (19 comments total)

That is both hilarious and revolting. Who knew saliva could, er, leaven stuffing like that?
posted by grumpybear69 at 2:32 PM on January 2, 2018 [1 favorite]

Did you just ruin stuffing for me? I think you just ruined stuffing for me. I'm sad now.
posted by mikesch at 2:33 PM on January 2, 2018

What's this stuff in my stuffing?
posted by jim in austin at 2:58 PM on January 2, 2018

no
posted by chococat at 3:21 PM on January 2, 2018 [1 favorite]

This... this is one of those sfw porn videos isn’t it. Like the ones with people popping balloons

Or is this the meta fetish of tricking people into watching other people’s fetish videos
posted by danny the boy at 3:24 PM on January 2, 2018 [2 favorites]

Awesome
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 3:33 PM on January 2, 2018

You should see her bone a chicken!

I totally stole this joke from a chef friend's Facebook
posted by Nelson at 3:52 PM on January 2, 2018

Did you just ruin stuffing for me?

Was missing the "stuffing" tag. Fixed.
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 4:04 PM on January 2, 2018

This probably requires a little context. In England there is an anti-knife hysteria:
The linked video is a protest against oppressive laws and customs in the UK.
This literal and metaphorical effort to disarm the citizenry has gone so far as to convince the public that using a kitchen knife with a point is dangerous and is an indication that you are a criminal. If you think this is absurd then you have not been paying attention. Something similar will happen in the United States soon. The gradual disarming of Americans is following a similar trajectory. When I was a kid it was common for adult men to carry penknives. The ubiquitous Swiss Army Knife is now a thing of the past. If you make a youtube video showing a knife cutting wood you are likely to have your video removed and it is possible that your channel will be silenced.

This might be a massive derail but here goes. I followed a link here a few days ago about pockets in women's clothing. The gist of the piece is that pockets have been systematically removed from women's clothes to literally and metaphorically disarm them. When women had the opportunity to get pockets, one of the first things they put in them was weapons.

Now to get to my point: Young men today do not carry anything in their pockets. They no longer carry cash ( all purchases use credit cards ). You don't need a wallet to hold an ID and a credit card. And increasingly they don't want or need keys: Check this out. This man is reviewing a ( frankly terrible ) bicycle lock. He is complaining that it has small keys that are easy to lose. The reason they are so easy to lose is that he dosn't have a key ring. All his doors use key-less entry. With no keys and no wallet he doesn't need pockets anymore. I think that gradually pockets will be removed from men's clothes just as they have been removed from women's clothes ( and for the same reason). This process is already underway. If you have been to a major sports game in the last 20 years or so you have seen people carry transparent hip bags or tiny transparent backpacks. This is to assure the security forces that you are not carrying a weapon. Recently I have seen people walking on the street with these transparent bags. This attitude is being normalized. It is just a matter of time before anybody without a transparent bag will be suspect.

Did nobody else notice that this video was satirical and expressly political?
posted by metasluggo at 5:16 PM on January 2, 2018 [1 favorite]

I like your theory metasluggo but do you have any evidence for it? Not saying it's wrong, but it seems pretty specific.

Gizmodo has more info on the video. The creator is an artist Nathan Ceddia (somewhat NSFW). A lot of his works are food-themed and creepy.
posted by Nelson at 5:49 PM on January 2, 2018

From the Gizmodo link: He seems severely interested in food. One of his projects involves naked men and women sitting on gelatin sculptures

These are both true statements.
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 5:57 PM on January 2, 2018

I like your theory metasluggo but do you have any evidence for it? Not saying it's wrong, but it seems pretty specific.

Gizmodo has more info on the video. The creator is an artist Nathan Ceddia (somewhat NSFW). A lot of his works are food-themed and creepy.

Which part of my theory do you think requires proof? It seems pretty obvious to me that Nathan Ceddia is making a video poking fun at the anti-knife Hysteria gripping the UK. If you never read the British press you don't get exposed to it, but it is a giant wall of propaganda. If you are taking about my analysis of the Police State then you can make your own determination about where things are going. I think Malcolm X made an important distinction between human rights and civil rights.

When we begin to get in this area, we need new friends, we need new allies. We need to expand the civil-rights struggle to a higher level -- to the level of human rights. Whenever you are in a civil-rights struggle, whether you know it or not, you are confining yourself to the jurisdiction of Uncle Sam. No one from the outside world can speak out in your behalf as long as your struggle is a civil-rights struggle. Civil rights comes within the domestic affairs of this country. All of our African brothers and our Asian brothers and our Latin-American brothers cannot open their mouths and interfere in the domestic affairs of the United States. And as long as it's civil rights, this comes under the jurisdiction of Uncle Sam.

But the United Nations has what's known as the charter of human rights; it has a committee that deals in human rights. You may wonder why all of the atrocities that have been committed in Africa and in Hungary and in Asia, and in Latin America are brought before the UN, and the Negro problem is never brought before the UN. (“The Ballot or the Bullet”; Malcolm X Speaks 34)

The issue of self defense is an elementary human right. Today we have a war between overt fascism like this, and a group of poorly organized anti-fascist protesters. The Fascists represent the state. They have an interest in disarming the public to advance their aims. I think the onus is on YOU to provide some proof that the state is not consolidating their power and acting like the Nazis they are.

I could write much more but I need to get some sleep.
posted by metasluggo at 6:20 PM on January 2, 2018

Which part of my theory do you think requires proof?

All of it, considering the artist seems to have a bent with human bodies and our relationship to food.
posted by MiltonRandKalman at 8:36 PM on January 2, 2018 [3 favorites]

uh... so this is like constructing stuffing from a deconstructed stuffing... as gross as it is, its also pretty novel in what it achieves. I don't know any restaurants that have tried to go the premastication route at all - let alone successfully, but if we ever open a restaurant for various apes... this might do rather well for the younger crowd...
posted by Nanukthedog at 8:38 PM on January 2, 2018

Which part of my theory do you think requires proof?

All of it, considering the artist seems to have a bent with human bodies and our relationship to food.
posted by MiltonRandKalman at 5:36 on January 3 [2 favorites +] [!]

I don't feel like providing any more proof than I already have. You might start by googling if you don't think the links I provided are enough. Maybe somebody from the UK can chime in.

I think it is interesting that you ( or anybody ) is questioning what is going on here. These trends seem pretty obvious to me. Maybe it is because I have been watching them develop for so long. The boiled frog comes to mind.

I sent him an email. Maybe he will respond.
posted by metasluggo at 3:56 AM on January 3, 2018

I don't think people are questioning whether or not there is a trend toward disarmament so much as whether this video is intended as a response to that. I remain unconvinced that it is, personally, so if it is that it didn't work for me.

If anything, I find the video to be a commentary on porn & male directors having women engage in physically uncomfortable, distasteful, or humiliating acts on film for entertainment. Or maybe it's just the latter, without the commentary.
posted by Westringia F. at 4:28 AM on January 3, 2018

Looking through the other films on his website, I'm not seeing the connection to the debate over knives. In context, this looks like another of his films exploring bodies/food/grossness with some humor.
posted by Dip Flash at 6:40 AM on January 3, 2018

The artist did a series called 'cake holes' about the interplay of eroticism and food, so, no, I don't think that this person is talking about the regulation of knives (and removal of pockets). There's a lot of artist videos about now reflecting the aesthetics of the instagram era (Lev Manovich just wrote a book about it, it's hawt stuff in the art world rn).

One of the big problems with art is that you can't control what the audience are going to see in it. I guess the audience of metafilter - nerdy, self-educated and opinionated on a large realm of topics - are going to have different responses to the average gallery goer.
posted by The River Ivel at 7:09 AM on January 3, 2018

I don't know any restaurants that have tried to go the premastication route at all - let alone successfully, but if we ever open a restaurant for various apes... this might do rather well for the younger crowd...

Especially baby birds.
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 7:30 AM on January 3, 2018