Third Place? Here’s Why I Started Exploring the Sewers

February 7, 2024 7:01 AM

Third Place? Here’s Why I Started Exploring the Sewers "Although the sewers have everything I’m looking for in a third place (rats, a constant fear of being discovered), I can recognize that they might not be for everyone. Similarly, some third places I tried out and found lacking that you should avoid at all costs include: standing too long in one place on the sidewalk (illegal), reading a book at a bookstore without buying it (illegal), and being outdoors without your wallet (illegal)."
posted by AlSweigart (19 comments total)

Some beavers consider a nearby storm sewer outfall their first place, and the surge pond and surrounding area can be quite pleasant, in a decaying urban hybrid ecology sort of way.

Just ignore the line of toilet paper on the tree trunks marking the CSO flood line.
posted by Headfullofair at 7:18 AM on February 7 [2 favorites]

It took far longer for me to realize this was a Reductress article than I'd like to admit.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 7:19 AM on February 7 [12 favorites]

Time was that the sewers were the place to be. You could find cool gangs, fantastical otherworlds, handsome and/or wacky mutants, and hardly any drifts of toilet paper or used condoms.
posted by Countess Elena at 7:29 AM on February 7 [6 favorites]

all the best sewer systems have fatberg mitigation crews
posted by seanmpuckett at 8:39 AM on February 7 [1 favorite]

Post-apocalyptic scifi meets late-stage capitalism! I see a Black Mirror episode in this article's future.

Metafilter: existing in public without having to pay money.
posted by panglos at 8:49 AM on February 7 [2 favorites]

They are just now upgrading the sewer systems in my city to like 60" lines, large enough for an It clown to move into. I'm really looking forward to that. A few years later some ninja turtles and their rat friend should find a home.

Seriously, just because the interiors of sewage systems suffer all the problems mentioned in Countess Elena's article (poisoned air, darkness, horrific smell), the storm drainage outlflows on the edges of the average city's sewer system are moderately habitable, when not conveying storm water of course.
posted by The_Vegetables at 8:53 AM on February 7 [1 favorite]

Frank and Charlie spend a lot of time in the sewers. "Anything could be down there... coins, nudity, ... that's all part of the fun."
posted by hydra77 at 8:55 AM on February 7 [4 favorites]

They are just now upgrading the sewer systems in my city to like 60" lines, large enough for an It clown to move into.

Oh, so your city has decided to explore that branch of the Civilization tech tree.
posted by JHarris at 9:20 AM on February 7 [4 favorites]

Is this thread where the sewer assignments are happening? I volunteer for the Tokyo water drainage system
posted by qxntpqbbbqxl at 9:26 AM on February 7 [3 favorites]

Tokyo is far too bougie. Without the threat of being crushed by a horrific mass of fat, wet wipes, and tangled hair, how will today's youth ever know the freedom and community that a true Third Place can offer?
posted by DSime at 10:19 AM on February 7 [3 favorites]

@DSime: I just clicked on your link as I'm eating my lunch. First line of the article "There are subjects one should avoid while eating. This is one of them."
posted by hydra77 at 11:13 AM on February 7 [2 favorites]

Yeah, let's remember the funny jokes when we're all down there mining fatbergs for fuel...

Oh hey, idea for a movie. It's 2047, and the price of oil has exceeded the price of making prisoners mine the fatbergs deep underground... the stench of lightly perfumed french fries encircles the City. Losses due to mutant racoons remain at acceptable levels. But, desperate to fend off the coming ice age, we delve too greedily and too deep… horrors below ... plucky and diverse band of prisoners, etc. etc. ... Anyone feel like writing this? I'd watch it
posted by kleinsteradikaleminderheit at 11:15 AM on February 7 [6 favorites]

every ten years we rediscover Bowling Alone and The Third Place and every ten years small business owners co-opt this and decide what the world needs is another coffee shop that sells black coffee (no refills) for $9 while the city zones another plot of land for luxury townhome development (starting the 700s, it's great for the market and we need more housing your favorite nimby will say in your neighborhood FB group)
posted by paimapi at 11:18 AM on February 7 [3 favorites]

> the library doesn’t present you with the opportunity to accidentally mutate into something weird.

Give it time, young one.
posted by The Card Cheat at 11:23 AM on February 7 [8 favorites]

Third Place... or Third Man?
posted by AJaffe at 12:07 PM on February 7 [2 favorites]

Anyone feel like writing this?

depends.. how gross are we going with this? if people aren't harvesting spent condoms for protein I don't want to hear another word
posted by elkevelvet at 12:08 PM on February 7 [4 favorites]

Separate storm water and sewer systems make for a much more civilised pastime. I've been heading down underground since I was a teen, please don't tell my mum.

I've got to put up 1000 of these stickers or Cave Clan will chop off my fingers
posted by deadwax at 2:53 PM on February 7 [4 favorites]

The TV Tropes live action section missed Jowdorowsky-directed/disowned film The Rainbow Thief.
posted by larrybob at 4:57 PM on February 7

I spent some of my happiest childhood times exploring and hanging out in storm sewers. They were cool and were a wonderful place to hide. It was a cleaner world in those days though.
posted by a humble nudibranch at 10:13 PM on February 7