Facebook FAQ

September 19, 2011 4:57 AM

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ) for new users of Facebook.
posted by bobbyelliott (26 comments total)

What about privacy?

What about it? You are not that important. The Facebook default settings are fine to start with. You can refine them once you know what you're doing. But if you are really concerned about this, be sure to add "narcissistic lunatic" to your profile.

Woah.
posted by fancyoats at 5:05 AM on September 19, 2011

Who wrote this? Not Facebook, or anyone in the US if they're spelling mothers as mums.
posted by smoke at 5:09 AM on September 19, 2011

They're/their. Please kill me now. I'd like to apologise to the academy, and my mum.
posted by smoke at 5:11 AM on September 19, 2011

self-link?
posted by lrobertjones at 5:11 AM on September 19, 2011 [2 favorites]

Wow. You blew a 6 year membership on a self link. How bizarre.
posted by smoke at 5:12 AM on September 19, 2011 [1 favorite]

On a self-link about facebook, ffs.
posted by elizardbits at 5:14 AM on September 19, 2011

I've heard about this Facebook thing. Thank you for finally providing a link to it!
posted by twoleftfeet at 5:15 AM on September 19, 2011

How bizarre.

What's especially bizarre is that it's this self-link. I'm mystified what the point would be.
posted by Horace Rumpole at 5:16 AM on September 19, 2011

Is this something I would have to be on Facebook to understand?
posted by Splunge at 5:17 AM on September 19, 2011

What about privacy?

What about it? You are not that important.

Fuck you
posted by the noob at 5:19 AM on September 19, 2011

I'm still confused about how to tweet. tweets.com is no help. I tried abouttweets.com, but that didn't help either. There must be some way for me to learn how to tweet. Can any of you web-savvy types help me?
posted by twoleftfeet at 5:19 AM on September 19, 2011

self-link?

You are not that important.
posted by Obscure Reference at 5:19 AM on September 19, 2011

!(⊗_⊗)~
posted by cmonkey at 5:20 AM on September 19, 2011

First, twoleftfeet, you'll need a piccolo and some vaseline.
posted by Wolfdog at 5:20 AM on September 19, 2011

distraction
posted by GreyFoxVT at 5:21 AM on September 19, 2011

T̟̰͕̿̎ͦͨ̎h̼̟̲̺̰ͩ̌ͦ̋͆ͩ̽͌̈́́̕ȅ̷̲̲͓̳̰͓̚ ̵͖͚̙̬̪͈̬͔ͤ̐ͥ̓̐̋͊͜m̹͓͚̗̞̖͋͆͌̒̑̾̕ǫ̨̻̙̒ͤ̿͂ͨ̇ͅd͇͇͔̻̈́̽̅ͥͣͨ͗ͪs̛̤̞͈̬̤̩̞̈́!̘͇͒̍ͭͭ̀͞ ̰̘̗̀̀ͦ͋̒̈́ͬ͝T̷̬̻̀ͫ͆̍ͨͪ͆H̍̐ͭ̾̎̓ͩ҉̖̹͖͎͚͝E̡̳̦̘̰͖̭͙̝ͯͥ̈́͠Yͮ͏̵̺̜͓͡ ̴̳̺̬̾̈́̋͑̐͐̊́͡C͖̼̤̻̒̈ͮ̾͛ͣỎ̡͙̞̟̣̟͍̥͊͠M̭̝̗̞̻̣̘̉ͭ̅͗̉̂̚Ẹ͓̪̓͌̃̀͜!̴̵̮̭͕̬̪̖͓̪̩ͥ̌́̈͞
posted by Splunge at 5:22 AM on September 19, 2011 [1 favorite]

you'll need a piccolo and some vaseline.

I tried piccolo.com, but that didn't work. Next I'll try vaseline. Thanks for the help!
posted by twoleftfeet at 5:22 AM on September 19, 2011

Oh boo.
posted by nevercalm at 5:22 AM on September 19, 2011

I think the mods are still having their pancakes.
posted by elizardbits at 5:22 AM on September 19, 2011

Now I want waffles. But I just had two slices of cold pizza.
posted by Splunge at 5:23 AM on September 19, 2011

In before deletion
posted by Joe Chip at 5:23 AM on September 19, 2011

I lurk
posted by the noob at 5:24 AM on September 19, 2011

Hey, didn't you guys consider that it might be a coincidence? There have to be at least 100 bobbyelliotts out there. You've all been flagged for a presumptuous derail. For shame, people. Have some restraint.
posted by troll at 5:25 AM on September 19, 2011

Do you have one about Metafilter, too?
posted by whir at 5:26 AM on September 19, 2011

Where was I? I forgot the point that I was making... I said if I was smart that I would save up for a piece of string and a rock to wind the string around.
posted by crapmatic at 5:26 AM on September 19, 2011

No I'm bobbyelliot!
posted by Splunge at 5:26 AM on September 19, 2011