This is a city street, not a golf course

October 10, 2012 7:09 AM

Pedestrian Penalty Cards Collect them all (some words NSFW)
posted by roomthreeseventeen (17 comments total)

If there's one thing I hate more than herds of tourists it's assholes sticking an A at the end of words and pretending it's an Italian accent.
posted by lydhre at 7:13 AM on October 10, 2012 [4 favorites]

Texting while walking and stopping at the foot of staircases always make me snarl.
posted by kuujjuarapik at 7:14 AM on October 10, 2012

Wow -- ageist, sexist, and assholish about foreigners, just in the first few. Fun for the whole family!
posted by aught at 7:15 AM on October 10, 2012 [6 favorites]

These are not funny. It would be better if they were funny.
posted by that's candlepin at 7:16 AM on October 10, 2012 [7 favorites]

Ugh, I hate these. Which one is it? You can't have both.
posted by valrus at 7:16 AM on October 10, 2012

Sidewalk biking, unless you are a child with training wheels or the accompanying adult, should be a capital crime. I'm not talking about the last few feet you ride before locking up your bike or carrying it into your building. I mean the people who ride their bike down the middle of the sidewalk like it's a normal and nonassholish thing to do. They must die.
posted by elizardbits at 7:17 AM on October 10, 2012 [6 favorites]

That is legal and normal in Germany.
posted by brokkr at 7:19 AM on October 10, 2012

Blocked by work internet. Is there a card for that? "Information Superhighway Denial" perhaps?
posted by arcticseal at 7:19 AM on October 10, 2012

Tragic how this concept could have been done without the racism and sexism and with you know, humor.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 7:20 AM on October 10, 2012 [4 favorites]

Man I do hate those giant golf umbrellas on the sidewalk, though.
posted by shakespeherian at 7:22 AM on October 10, 2012 [2 favorites]

Escalator Idiocy should be a "Shot with a speargun by the station agent" offense.
posted by Pirate-Bartender-Zombie-Monkey at 7:23 AM on October 10, 2012 [1 favorite]

Is it ironic that "Angry stranger trying to show you a card" should be a card?
posted by ghharr at 7:23 AM on October 10, 2012 [1 favorite]

Wow, that guy is a dick.
posted by Pope Guilty at 7:24 AM on October 10, 2012

Sidewalk biking, unless you are a child with training wheels or the accompanying adult, should be a capital crime. I'm not talking about the last few feet you ride before locking up your bike or carrying it into your building. I mean the people who ride their bike down the middle of the sidewalk like it's a normal and nonassholish thing to do. They must die.

I was run off the sidewalk by someone biking with one of those gigantic stroller/bike/wheel barrow things the other day. Not only is this person allowed to live...we let them raise children? It's terrifying.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 7:24 AM on October 10, 2012 [1 favorite]

Escalators are for riding, not walking. Most of them that I've ridden on aren't really wide enough for passing traffic. If you're really in that much of hurry take the stairs
posted by Apoch at 7:25 AM on October 10, 2012

unimaginative, and cliched
posted by mary8nne at 7:25 AM on October 10, 2012

"Physically fit violator"

ON-ON
posted by the man of twists and turns at 7:25 AM on October 10, 2012