That's no bull!

October 17, 2017 10:19 AM

There is an escaped cow in Prospect Park in Brooklyn! (FB video).

Apparently this has happened before and is relatively common, as New York City has "one of the largest concentration of live-animal markets" in the US.

The cow has been trapped between two trucks and the fencing of a ball field, and will likely be taken in shortly. Hopefully it has a happier ending than the Queens bull.

Previous escapees in the big city include a dead sand shark, goats, zebras, and a peacock.

In 1874, the New York Herald breathlessly the reported a massive breakout of animals from the Central Park Zoo , including a rampaging rhino, a panther, a Numidian lion, several hyenas, and a Bengal tiger, but it turned out to be fake news.

posted by Hermeowne Grangepurr (36 comments total)

insert harry caray quote.
posted by joecacti at 10:23 AM on October 17, 2017 [3 favorites]

i am so glad someone else posted this; i froze when trying to select just one pun as a title caption and simply couldn't commit.

LOOSE! BEEF! IN BROOKLYN! (BROOKLYN)
posted by halation at 10:28 AM on October 17, 2017 [29 favorites]

That ain't a cow. Pass kindergarten, America.

Also, they appear to be tranquilizing it? Why? And then what?
posted by Sys Rq at 10:35 AM on October 17, 2017 [3 favorites]

UPDATE: the cow has started a band
posted by thelonius at 10:37 AM on October 17, 2017 [56 favorites]

surprised there's nobody in Brooklyn who can authentically handle a lasso
posted by Countess Elena at 10:46 AM on October 17, 2017 [11 favorites]

the bushwick artisanal ropemaker's doesn't open on tuesdays
posted by poffin boffin at 10:47 AM on October 17, 2017 [35 favorites]

Just heard that it has been captured and loaded onto a truck.

In my experience, animals that have achieved this kind of "folk-hero" status end up going to a shelter or petting zoo or sanctuary, because the public outcry if they brought it back to the slaughterhouse would be ridiculous.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 10:49 AM on October 17, 2017

Cow has grown interesting facial hair and is now complaining about overhyping of cold brew
posted by Mchelly at 10:51 AM on October 17, 2017 [14 favorites]

I know this could be viewed as a humorous story of "livestock on the loose in the big city!", but it sincerely exists in a realm of tragedy. Please consider this (yet another) reason to stop eating meat.
posted by Jeff Morris at 10:52 AM on October 17, 2017 [11 favorites]

And here Andy Newman is off the NYT animal beat.
posted by bgribble at 10:52 AM on October 17, 2017 [2 favorites]

I am a-moo-sed.
posted by Fizz at 10:56 AM on October 17, 2017 [3 favorites]

In my experience, animals that have achieved this kind of "folk-hero" status end up going to a shelter or petting zoo or sanctuary, because the public outcry if they brought it back to the slaughterhouse would be ridiculous.

Veal see about that.
posted by uncleozzy at 10:58 AM on October 17, 2017 [8 favorites]

> New York City has "one of the largest concentration of live-animal markets" in the US

I will never forget coming across the Greenpoint "processing facility" with the no-nonsense painted sign saying "POULTRY SLAUGHTER" where some wag had carefully painted out the "S".

I don't think that's actually "cognitive dissonance" or "irony" but it's somewhere in there.
posted by bgribble at 11:02 AM on October 17, 2017 [2 favorites]

Reminds me of this. “OMG, THERE'S A FUCKING LLAMA, WHAT IS GOING ON?!!”
posted by Fizz at 11:03 AM on October 17, 2017 [4 favorites]

lol i was just reliving the arizona escaped therapy llama drama from 2015
posted by poffin boffin at 11:04 AM on October 17, 2017 [3 favorites]

Previously, on cows in Prospect Park and its environs: Udderless Brooklyn.
posted by MonkeyToes at 11:16 AM on October 17, 2017 [4 favorites]

UPDATE: The cow is milking itself and just opened an artisanal ice cream stand
posted by I_Love_Bananas at 11:18 AM on October 17, 2017 [2 favorites]

The real question that needs answering though, what colour dress is the cow wearing: black and blue or white and gold?!
posted by Fizz at 11:19 AM on October 17, 2017 [1 favorite]

Once again, that's a BULL, so if he offers you single-origin artisanal ice cream, DON'T TAKE IT
posted by blnkfrnk at 11:22 AM on October 17, 2017 [26 favorites]

Mod note: Couple comments deleted. Sys Rq, start acting like you want to be here, or you won't be.
posted by LobsterMitten (staff) at 12:33 PM on October 17, 2017

Heifster!
posted by chavenet at 12:46 PM on October 17, 2017 [2 favorites]

BULL PENS OP-ED: WHY I'M LEAVING BROOKLYN FOR GREENER PASTURES
posted by grumpybear69 at 12:59 PM on October 17, 2017 [2 favorites]

how has no one yet made a 'Moo The Right Thing' joke
get it together, people
posted by halation at 12:59 PM on October 17, 2017 [5 favorites]

Once again, that's a BULL, so if he offers you single-origin artisanal ice cream, DON'T TAKE IT

I haven't watched any of the video to be sure but it's more likely he's a steer.
posted by nathan_teske at 1:04 PM on October 17, 2017 [1 favorite]

UPDATE: Cow has opened bespoke leather bicycle saddle company in gory performance art stunt protest in trusty art loft in Queens, left despondent after scathing reviews by jaded critics comparing him to Damien Hirst.
posted by loquacious at 1:16 PM on October 17, 2017 [1 favorite]

surprised there's nobody in Brooklyn who can authentically handle a lasso

If only it had happened in Queens.
posted by Halloween Jack at 1:37 PM on October 17, 2017 [4 favorites]

my name is Cow
and wen its day
and wen the Man
cant mak me stay
thats wen i run
give cops the slip
im in parkslop
i fil so hip
posted by Mchelly at 1:51 PM on October 17, 2017 [41 favorites]

Update: the young bull (now confirmed as male) was captured, much to the sadness of onlookers, and is now awaiting transport to a sanctuary in NJ or on Long Island.
posted by Hermeowne Grangepurr at 1:53 PM on October 17, 2017 [3 favorites]

I live a tenth of a mile from a small meat packing business. (It's around a corner, then down a small suburban block.) A few times a year small amounts of animals make a break for it during the transfer from trailer to the building. I love animal anarchy.

A couple years ago three cows made the local paper for taking off down the alley and running around in front of the fire and police stations for twenty minutes. (The city I live in is just south of Indianapolis...it takes me 13 minutes to get downtown. So while I do live in Indiana I am not out in the sticks.)
posted by fluffy battle kitten at 2:04 PM on October 17, 2017

If only it had happened in Queens.

Or Harlem.
posted by maxsparber at 2:05 PM on October 17, 2017 [1 favorite]

OP should have probably linked the video in question? The link to WCVB's main page is increasingly irrelevant...timelines gotta line, y'all.
posted by Ogre Lawless at 2:48 PM on October 17, 2017 [1 favorite]

Bah, yes. I thought I had posted a static link to the live feed but I guess not. If the link could be updated, thank you!
posted by Hermeowne Grangepurr at 3:15 PM on October 17, 2017

Jeff Morris: I know this could be viewed as a humorous story of "livestock on the loose in the big city!", but it sincerely exists in a realm of tragedy. Please consider this (yet another) reason to stop eating meat.
posted

Just flag and moo-ve on.
posted by dr_dank at 3:35 PM on October 17, 2017 [5 favorites]

Mod note: Fixed link!
posted by Eyebrows McGee (staff) at 3:40 PM on October 17, 2017

I spent the better part of an hour watching our bovine friend on Periscope as he roamed the soccer field. He attracted quite a crowd of onlookers too!
posted by epj at 5:48 PM on October 17, 2017 [2 favorites]

This happened yesterday’s? She was probably looking for this guy: Bull escapes California petting zoo, runs down busy road
posted by Room 641-A at 4:22 AM on October 18, 2017