Whoa, Quorn!

August 16, 2022 1:16 PM

The Quorn Fermentation

In the late 1950s, forecasters predicted a worldwide shortage of protein-rich foods within 30 years (that is, by the 1980s). It was hoped that single cell protein (SCP), particularly microbes, could provide a means of solving the anticipated world food shortage by industrial production of cheap protein alternatives to meat protein, potentially using wastes as substrates.

posted by thoroughburro (46 comments total)

Something, something, soylent green.
posted by Naberius at 1:21 PM on August 16, 2022 [3 favorites]

I was expecting a different SCP to make an appearance.
posted by mhoye at 1:36 PM on August 16, 2022 [13 favorites]

The Quorn Fermentation

They're doing another Jason Bourne movie??
posted by Greg_Ace at 1:40 PM on August 16, 2022 [54 favorites]

I was expecting a different SCP to make an appearance.

To be fair, it still might.
posted by GenjiandProust at 1:44 PM on August 16, 2022

Came here for the Ludlum joke, was not disappointed.
posted by flabdablet at 1:44 PM on August 16, 2022 [3 favorites]

Interesting to see starch described as a "waste product from cereal processing". Not sure if glossing over something or an early Atkins proponent...
posted by clawsoon at 1:46 PM on August 16, 2022 [1 favorite]

I’d give it a try if they could duplicate the other quality of meat that makes it so good: the rich fattiness. Im that guy who wants fatty, crisp bacon and eats the topcap on brisket BBQ. Lean beef is just too damn dry (which is why I’m not a proponent of chicken, mostly).

Fat = Flavor. Lean is just mean and joyless.

BTW, I eat the fat in moderation.

I’m not some grease-dripping carnivorous Texan with veins in ma teef screaming for the blood of dead animals while roosting on a pile of corpses, waving a gun in one hand and a pit bull in the other with a Come and Take It flag.

I have eaten a vegetable once.

He was delicious.
posted by JustSayNoDawg at 1:58 PM on August 16, 2022 [3 favorites]

Quorn's all right. I think of all the mass-produced meat substitutes, it's the one that approximates some of the features of meat pretty well, and the one I didn't mind at all when my wife was vegetarian. It's a little off in the texture department, not chewy at all, and with a little bit of tofu-like sponginess. It absorbs flavours, more so than chicken, and seems to be able to fake the whole gamut of meat products, some better than others.
posted by pipeski at 1:59 PM on August 16, 2022 [7 favorites]

I like the stuff. It's great in curries and stir fries, two types of meal I enjoy. It was one of the first commercially available 'meat replacements' that did not resemble a fried hockey puck.
posted by Too-Ticky at 2:28 PM on August 16, 2022 [7 favorites]

I ate so much Quorn when I lived in the UK In the mid 2000s!! Love the stuff and always wish we could get it in Canada.
posted by dazedandconfused at 2:56 PM on August 16, 2022 [6 favorites]

Heh... "Tastes Like Despair", brought to you by Veridian Dynamics - the next generation of food and "food-like products"...
posted by rozcakj at 3:01 PM on August 16, 2022 [1 favorite]

I also like Quorn. When we go shopping it's a regular purchase. Along side of real meat and other vegetarian "meats".
posted by Splunge at 3:02 PM on August 16, 2022 [2 favorites]

To be fair, it still might.

The mention of gibberellic acids does suggest a turn to the Lovecraftean.
posted by acb at 3:06 PM on August 16, 2022 [3 favorites]

If the original link feels too technical to read the Wikipedia description is simpler. Or to simplify further; they grow a special single cell fungus in a bath of sugar and nitrogen. The fungus makes protein, which is then processed and eaten.

I tripped up a bit on the word "fermentation" since to me that conjures up lacto-fermentation or alcohol fermentation. In those processes you eat the waste product of the beasties; with quorn I think it's more like you're eating the beasties itself.

Growing protein isn't so hard. The real trick is in the processing to make an appealing texture and flavor. The red kibble from Eros is considered the best for a reason and it's not just for its reported aphrodisiac qualities. Shame what happened to the place.
posted by Nelson at 3:11 PM on August 16, 2022 [7 favorites]

Also, I didn't know that Nissin (the Cup Noodle ramen people, IIRC) owned Quorn, or were headquartered in the Philippines (I imagined them to be Japanese for some reason).
posted by acb at 3:16 PM on August 16, 2022

It's just a man in a lizard suit out in the desert. Shatner could have just waited until the sun went down to fight him.
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln at 3:18 PM on August 16, 2022 [10 favorites]

I like it, but my wife got violently ill the two times we had it.
Other people have too. Link
posted by cuscutis at 3:27 PM on August 16, 2022 [2 favorites]

I just like saying “Quorn” when I see it in the store…

IT’S QUORN!
posted by Windopaene at 3:56 PM on August 16, 2022

I've never been tempted to try Quorn , but I do remember that when it first came out the ads described it as made from "a tiny relative of the mushroom" which, well yes, I suppose...
posted by Fuchsoid at 4:16 PM on August 16, 2022 [1 favorite]

I want to like Quorn (it's in so many tasty vegan things) but it absolutely hates me. If I even have a little bit I'll end up subjecting myself to a very painful day or so on the toilet, and another few days of feeling pretty gross.

Apparently Quorn intolerance with unfun gastric symptoms is a thing, though it's not widely studied. Anecdotally I've had a few online conversations with people who have reported the exact same things and assumed it was just them. Nope, some folks just can't handle our weird lab grown fungus!

Solidarity high five to your wife, cuscutis!
posted by fight or flight at 4:26 PM on August 16, 2022 [3 favorites]

Also for UK folks, the Gregg's vegan sausage rolls are made with Quorn. As I discovered to my surprise (and eventual sadness).
posted by fight or flight at 4:30 PM on August 16, 2022

Came here for the Ludlum joke, was not disappointed.

The Ludlum Joculation
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 4:45 PM on August 16, 2022 [5 favorites]

The problem with Quorn is that it has chicken eggs in it, like older Morningstar Farms products. 90s relics.
posted by kittensofthenight at 5:24 PM on August 16, 2022

As a vegetarian for about 30 years now (although I'll eat some seafood off and on), Quorn freaks me out. I am told it's really nothing like the actual texture of meat, but there's still some kind of uncanny valley thing happening. It just seems too close to being actual meat that even when I know it's not, it just kind of grosses me out.

I am pretty ok with the Impossible Burger (Beyond Burger puts me off though). I think maybe I don't like my fake meat to be too much like meat.

Good for you if you do, though.
posted by edencosmic at 5:33 PM on August 16, 2022

The internet is for Quorn.
posted by Halloween Jack at 6:26 PM on August 16, 2022 [9 favorites]

"If the truth can be told so as to be understood, it will be believed." (Quorn)
posted by soylent00FF00 at 6:32 PM on August 16, 2022

I wish every industrial product got that treatment!

Truly. Our existing methane-based meat production is hell on earth. Donaldsonville, LA, and Yazoo City, MS, where the CF Industries fertilizer plants are located, are rated "the worst towns in the USA" on the regular, for the poverty and illness. The kids have weird skin conditions from all the ammonia in the air. One wishes for some testing in these areas.
posted by eustatic at 7:35 PM on August 16, 2022 [2 favorites]

To quote a quorny movie.... 'Tell everyone [SCP] is people!'. Main ingredient changed for the over-sensistive. Edward G Robinson's last movie and a somewhat Bladerunner prequel with Charlton Heston in the main character role.
posted by IndelibleUnderpants at 7:56 PM on August 16, 2022

The warning that I received, you may take with however many grains of salt you wish, that the gibberellic acid that is circulating around us, is specifically not too good. It's suggested that you do stay away from that; of course, it's your own trip, so, be my guest.
posted by loquacious at 8:07 PM on August 16, 2022 [6 favorites]

TFA explains in a couple of places that this acid and a number of other compounds of concern have never been detected in 30 years of the production process, with testing carried out daily. We are, of course, taking Marlow Foods's word for it.

I don't know if there is gibberellic acid circulating around me, but it sounds like it's not in the Quorn. I don't doubt that some people are sensitive to the food for other reasons, though. (The link a couple people have shared is paywalled; I can't read it.)

For TL/DRers: It was interesting to read that the long, stringy Fusarium venenatum strain they start out with starts to become out-competed by a branchier mutant strain that turns up after a bit more than 100 generations, at which point they start over with a new culture. The branchy variety is disfavored only because it has the wrong texture, but the article says it could be useful for other food substitutes.

Quorn is a utility food for me, a yeomanly meat substitute that's okay but not too special. I eat it all the time.
posted by Chef Flamboyardee at 9:01 PM on August 16, 2022 [3 favorites]

the gibberellic acid that is circulating around us, is specifically not too good. It's suggested that you do stay away from that

Quornstock was so groovy, man! I think my favorite group was Quornsby Stills Nash & Young.
posted by Greg_Ace at 9:08 PM on August 16, 2022 [3 favorites]

It's worth highlighting the book/website that contains this long article as just one subchapter... of chapter 17! This is someone's life's work: truly best-of-the-web stuff.

ETA: Of course I only now get loquacious's reference!
posted by Chef Flamboyardee at 9:14 PM on August 16, 2022 [2 favorites]

Apparently Quorn intolerance with unfun gastric symptoms is a thing, though it's not widely studied. Anecdotally I've had a few online conversations with people who have reported the exact same things and assumed it was just them. Nope, some folks just can't handle our weird lab grown fungus!

Huh I thought this was a well-known thing. For some reason I’d filed Quorn in my head somewhere with Olestra i.e. as “revolutionary” food products that never reached their potential because a fairly small percentage of consumers had GI effects that sounded bad enough to turn everyone else off.
posted by atoxyl at 10:44 PM on August 16, 2022 [1 favorite]

[helicopter noise, schoolmaster's voice:]
How can ye have any pudding, if ye don't eat your Veat™!
posted by bartleby at 11:23 PM on August 16, 2022 [1 favorite]

Have a quorntastic day!

What?? It's just a pun about quorn?!
posted by mpark at 12:01 AM on August 17, 2022 [6 favorites]

I miss quornsar.
posted by loquacious at 1:06 AM on August 17, 2022 [4 favorites]

I eat quite a bit of Quorn. Was slightly saddened when what used to be their "Swedish Meatballs" were renamed "Swedish-Style Balls" though. It does mean I end up wandering round the supermarket muttering "Balls... Balls... Balls" or occasionally exclaiming "Balls!" if I'm in danger of forgetting them.
posted by TheophileEscargot at 2:02 AM on August 17, 2022 [3 favorites]

A Swedish-style ball would be boll, surely?
posted by Grangousier at 2:06 AM on August 17, 2022

I do feel like there should be some kind of Wojack meme where an angry crying guy says "NOOOOOO YOU CAN'T JUST EAT VEGETARIAN FOOD THAT'S EASY TO PREPARE AND AND TASTES A BIT LIKE MEAT YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE SOAKING BEANS FOR HOURS AND THEN COOKING FOR MORE HOURS IN A TRADITIONAL ETHNIC STYLE" and a smiling guy next to him says "HAHA FRYING QUORN SAUSAGES GO FZZZLZZZLZZZL"
posted by TheophileEscargot at 2:35 AM on August 17, 2022 [7 favorites]

A moose once bit my quorn . .
posted by Bee'sWing at 5:43 AM on August 17, 2022

Makes me violently ill. I’m vegan, potlucks are a minefield.
posted by anshuman at 6:28 AM on August 17, 2022 [1 favorite]

YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE SOAKING BEANS FOR HOURS AND THEN COOKING FOR MORE HOURS IN A TRADITIONAL ETHNIC STYLE

Rick Martinez's book has really upped my bean game with one recipe. His philosophy is that if you soak beans in water, they taste like water. So he just cooks them from dried in a flavorful broth with salt and a lot of herbs and aromatics. With fresher dried beans it doesn't take more than two hours. Sometimes maybe 3-4 so it's ideal for days you're working from home.
posted by little onion at 10:16 AM on August 17, 2022 [2 favorites]

The conventional wisdom seemed to be that soaking beans (then discarding the soak water) leeches out whatever makes them give you gas, and I was about to post a comment correcting you. But fortunately I did some research and learned that's not true. I may need to make a big pot of beans this weekend to celebrate my new-found knowledge!
posted by Greg_Ace at 11:04 AM on August 17, 2022

Oh right, i forgot. It’s not even vegan. (My veg friend made it for an event, then looked it up while I was puking and it contains egg.)
posted by anshuman at 5:40 AM on August 18, 2022

Well, some of them do. They make some vegan products these days as well.
posted by JiBB at 12:21 AM on August 23, 2022

The conventional wisdom seemed to be that soaking beans (then discarding the soak water) leeches out whatever makes them give you gas

Right, all of those gas solutions feel a little like wishful thinking. In Mexican cooking, adding epazote is supposed to keep them from giving you gas. I'm trying it and hoping for the best!
posted by little onion at 8:39 AM on August 23, 2022