$7 Million Says I Won't Cheat Again. Spoiler alert: he cheated again

November 2, 2022 3:47 PM

The divorce of Melania Trump's former social secretary and the heir to Bunny Mellon's fortune is a classic example of why you should follow your lawyer's advice. Thomas Lloyd and Rickie Niceta married in 2006. He cheated on her in 2014 and after they reconciled, he voluntarily and against the advice of his lawyer signed a post-nuptial agreement to get her to stay in the marriage. The cost: he would give Rickie $7 million if he cheated again. He cheated again and now a court in Maryland says he needs to cough up the money.
posted by tafetta, darling! (36 comments total)

I'm thinking now of some dude on the opposite end of the social scale who got a chest tattoo of all his sins against his wife, clearly typed out beforehand on letter paper. It was about as tasteful and about as likely to make the relationship happy. Like Thomas Lloyd, I don't know anything about him except that he has a problem with grand gestures and with impulse control.
posted by Countess Elena at 4:20 PM on November 2, 2022 [4 favorites]

Two tacos says this one appears in a contract law casebook by 2024.
posted by RakDaddy at 4:53 PM on November 2, 2022 [16 favorites]

"Lloyd had argued that the agreement, at the time of signing, would have left him in debt for about $1.2 million. The appeals court upheld a trial judge’s finding that Lloyd got the valuation wrong..."

Nice argument from a wealth manager.
posted by Capt. Renault at 5:00 PM on November 2, 2022 [3 favorites]

From the post-nup., without comment.

"he shall not engage in intentional viewing of pornographic or sexually explicit pictures and videos for so long as the parties remain married"
posted by mikelieman at 5:19 PM on November 2, 2022 [10 favorites]

something about a fool and his money?
posted by kokaku at 5:22 PM on November 2, 2022 [5 favorites]

Two tacos says this one appears in a contract law casebook by 2024
I hope not! That means no used books. Also, it's family law.
posted by atomicstone at 5:50 PM on November 2, 2022

Someone ispared no expense not being the master of his domain.
posted by y2karl at 6:04 PM on November 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

#ETTD has now added #EMTTD.
posted by pthomas745 at 6:09 PM on November 2, 2022

Well, damn. All I can say is: you go, girl!

I mean, it's not unproblematic but it's pretty darn impressive, all of it.

Note: I am consensually nonmongamous. I really don't understand why so many people keep aspiring to monogamy and failing again and again versus reflecting and perhaps broadening their definition of what a so-called "successful", happy, and committed relationship can look li. Despite my relationship orientation, I am very single and will probably never get married; I'm not sure if I'm doing something right or wrong. After all, sticking to tradition has really paid off for her?!
posted by smorgasbord at 6:43 PM on November 2, 2022 [12 favorites]

If Husband is found by a preponderance of the evidence to have committed adultery, buggery or sodomy with any person;

Wouldn't this be triggered by anal or oral sex with his own wife?
posted by star gentle uterus at 6:55 PM on November 2, 2022 [10 favorites]

I hope not! That means no used books. Also, it's family law.

It could well be relevant to both family law and contract law classes.
posted by jacquilynne at 6:58 PM on November 2, 2022

After all, sticking to tradition has really paid off for her?!

Yes, to the tune of $7,000,000.
posted by stevis23 at 7:05 PM on November 2, 2022 [4 favorites]

Fuck around -> find out
posted by emd3737 at 7:29 PM on November 2, 2022 [34 favorites]

I wonder if he suggested raising to $7 million with the explicit plan of crying "unconscionable! would've bankrupted me at the time" should it ever become an issue.
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 8:39 PM on November 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

I can't believe the term "Fuck around and find out" existed before this lawsuit, because this lawsuit defines that term.
posted by Toddles at 8:42 PM on November 2, 2022 [12 favorites]

Polyamorous & non-monogamous people can cheat too. I don't believe it has anything to do with monogamy. I'm not a psychologist I don't know why cheaters do what they do, maybe it's simply that they feel good when they break whatever rules they agree to.

But I hope people look at this case and realize that it has nothing to do with unhappiness in marriage or being unfulfilled or whatever - he had an opportunity to walk away and he doubled down. I hope the pain he caused his ex-wife was worth the $7 million dollars he paid for the privilege.
posted by muddgirl at 9:10 PM on November 2, 2022 [12 favorites]

buggery????
posted by dis_integration at 9:21 PM on November 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

lots of people don't like bugs
posted by ryanrs at 10:48 PM on November 2, 2022 [10 favorites]

Polyamorous & non-monogamous people can cheat too.

QFT. Lots of lovely, sensible people in poly communities, but in my experience, it's also where the worst, most selfish, callous, cruel, controlling, awful people are found. They are a minority, but there's always at least one very broken stair.
posted by Dysk at 11:45 PM on November 2, 2022 [3 favorites]

buggery????

Starship Bloopers
posted by y2karl at 1:42 AM on November 3, 2022 [1 favorite]

something about a fool and his money?

Yes: "A fool and his money are soon partying."
posted by rhizome at 2:08 AM on November 3, 2022 [2 favorites]

followed through with his earlier plans to get a vasectomy; and took steps to convert to Catholicism, which was Ms. Niceta’s faith

Clearly taking that conversion really seriously!
posted by atrazine at 4:30 AM on November 3, 2022 [1 favorite]

Certain Protestant forms of Christianity are very anti-sex. Catholicism, by contrast, is pro-sex… with guilt and consequences. (Unless you’re a priest.) So yeah, it does indeed look like he took the conversion seriously!
posted by eviemath at 4:54 AM on November 3, 2022 [2 favorites]

Certain Protestant forms of Christianity are very anti-sex. Catholicism, by contrast, is pro-sex… with guilt and consequences. (Unless you’re a priest.) So yeah, it does indeed look like he took the conversion seriously!

yes but the pope says no vasectomies allowed. when you cheat on your wife to the tune of $7 million, it better be for the purposes of reproduction
posted by dis_integration at 5:32 AM on November 3, 2022 [3 favorites]

You'd have to be bugfuck crazy to agree to something like that.
posted by Halloween Jack at 5:36 AM on November 3, 2022

Oh rich people, never stop being a source of endless entertainment. Or at least until you start being an important source of food post-apocalypse.
posted by tommasz at 7:07 AM on November 3, 2022 [4 favorites]

Of course people who are nonmonogamous and polyamorous can and do cheat. Of course there are members of the community who are the scum of the earth. We all know that, which is why I didn’t focus on it in my initial comment. The bigger thing to me is how we are quick to criticize nonmonogamy, even people who are perhaps out of a defensiveness or internalized polyphobia (does this word even exist?) yet we continue to hold up monogamy as a default or ideal. Yes cheating can happen in all relationship forms but it certain plagues monogamy pretty heavily and for some people, maybe not this couple, honesty and self-reflections on wants and needs would help them live more ethically.

Finally, a difference of opinion does not mean only one person can be right. I think in these discussions on MetaFilter it too often becomes a debate of who’s right or wrong, sometimes due to brevity in an initial response, and I find it so annoying but also apparently inevitable.
posted by smorgasbord at 8:59 AM on November 3, 2022 [2 favorites]

I just don't think cheating - betraying trust and doing things you had agreed not to - and mono-/polyamoury are related that way. I don't think cheating can be reduced down to 'unmet sexual/romantic needs' basically. People with a history of cheating and lying don't tend to stop if and when they join poly communities, in my experience.
posted by Dysk at 9:10 AM on November 3, 2022 [8 favorites]

Certain Protestant forms of Christianity are very anti-sex.

It might lead to dancing.
posted by kirkaracha at 1:01 PM on November 3, 2022 [8 favorites]

Wow, that is surprising. I will take their word for it, but it's strange that the statutory provision against contract penalties beyond approximating damages doesn't apply. I guess "this is how we will divide our assets in these two scenarios" is quite different, and he did choose which path to go down.
posted by a robot made out of meat at 2:00 PM on November 3, 2022 [1 favorite]

You'd have to be bugfuck crazy to agree to something like that.

Pfft. That’s nothing. I know a guy who signed a no-due-dilligence contract to buy a social media company for wayyyyy more than its value.
posted by Thorzdad at 4:57 PM on November 3, 2022 [10 favorites]

People with a history of cheating and lying don't tend to stop if and when they join poly communities, in my experience.

Yeah, if the honesty/scheming/lying/whatever is what gets you off the most....
posted by jenfullmoon at 5:02 PM on November 3, 2022 [2 favorites]

Lots of lovely, sensible people in poly communities, but in my experience, it's also where the worst, most selfish, callous, cruel, controlling, awful people are found. They are a minority, but there's always at least one very broken stair.

Same can be said of those practicing monogamy; isn't this just a description of humanity in general?
posted by bearette at 9:39 AM on November 7, 2022

Absolutely, but monogamy wasn't proposed as a solution to it.
posted by Dysk at 10:43 AM on November 7, 2022

Yes as we can clearly see from this example, "more monogamy" is not generally a workable solution to infidelity either.
posted by muddgirl at 3:01 PM on November 7, 2022 [1 favorite]

Oh rich people, never stop being a source of endless entertainment. Or at least until you start being an important source of food post-apocalypse.

Anything To Serve Man then, amirite?
posted by y2karl at 3:36 PM on November 7, 2022