Decision 2006
January 5, 2006 3:28 PM Subscribe
Jon Stewart to host 2006 Academy Awards. "As a performer, I'm truly honored to be hosting the show,' Stewart says. "As an avid watcher of the Oscars, I can't help but be a little disappointed with the choice.'
JPowers, I just pictured an ancient warrior splitting Spielberg's head with a battle axe. Then I realized you were talking about O'Brien.
posted by brundlefly at 3:35 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by brundlefly at 3:35 PM on January 5, 2006
What, Billy Crystal wasn't available? :P
Seriously though, this is good news, and might make the Oscars worth watching this year, if only for a little bit where Jon tells some jokes.
My only concern is that Jon might be forced to tone down his act like Chris Rock reportedly was when he hosted them. Oh well. One way or the other, it'll be interesting and at least a little bit funny. At least.
posted by Effigy2000 at 3:36 PM on January 5, 2006
Seriously though, this is good news, and might make the Oscars worth watching this year, if only for a little bit where Jon tells some jokes.
My only concern is that Jon might be forced to tone down his act like Chris Rock reportedly was when he hosted them. Oh well. One way or the other, it'll be interesting and at least a little bit funny. At least.
posted by Effigy2000 at 3:36 PM on January 5, 2006
What I really want is Stewart to moderate the next presidential debates. But this will still be good... or an interesting train wreck.
("Has Stewart Jumped the Snark?" would be the headline of choice if it falls flat.)
posted by digaman at 3:37 PM on January 5, 2006
("Has Stewart Jumped the Snark?" would be the headline of choice if it falls flat.)
posted by digaman at 3:37 PM on January 5, 2006
...i may actually have to watch the Academy Awards this year.
posted by Doorstop at 3:41 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by Doorstop at 3:41 PM on January 5, 2006
After watching the Daily show, watching Conan is like eating the day-old crusty rice at the bottom of the pan after eating a $500 meal at benihana and fucking devon aoki.
posted by delmoi at 3:43 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by delmoi at 3:43 PM on January 5, 2006
"As the Grammies demonstrated, self-deprecation and ironic detachment don't mix well with fuel-injected enthusiasm required of awards-show hosts."
That sounds about right to me. My money is on train wreck, but at least I'm interested in watching the Oscars now.
posted by sellout at 3:44 PM on January 5, 2006
That sounds about right to me. My money is on train wreck, but at least I'm interested in watching the Oscars now.
posted by sellout at 3:44 PM on January 5, 2006
What I really want is Stewart to moderate the next presidential debates. But this will still be good... or an interesting train wreck.
If McCain gets the republican nomination, that could happen.
posted by delmoi at 3:44 PM on January 5, 2006
If McCain gets the republican nomination, that could happen.
posted by delmoi at 3:44 PM on January 5, 2006
Speaking for the rest of the world, why should we care?
posted by Joeforking at 3:54 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by Joeforking at 3:54 PM on January 5, 2006
You shouldn't. Fuck off.
posted by eyeballkid at 3:58 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by eyeballkid at 3:58 PM on January 5, 2006
eyeballkid: I care.
posted by feelinglistless at 4:00 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by feelinglistless at 4:00 PM on January 5, 2006
I had heard that it was gonna be Letterman and BOR.
posted by fixedgear at 4:01 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by fixedgear at 4:01 PM on January 5, 2006
Actualy, I think they should just let Devon Aoki host.
She is hot.
posted by delmoi at 4:02 PM on January 5, 2006
She is hot.
posted by delmoi at 4:02 PM on January 5, 2006
I'll watch the Oscars for this. Jon Stewart is one of those people I wish could just follow me around and narrate my life.
posted by Meredith at 4:03 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by Meredith at 4:03 PM on January 5, 2006
Billy Crystal's "edgy" political gags got appreciative, if insincere, laughter. Jon Stewart's scripted routine will probably not be afforded the same courtesy, so this will be a great car crash.
posted by fire&wings at 4:05 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by fire&wings at 4:05 PM on January 5, 2006
Speaking for the rest of the world, why should we care?
Oh goody, the troll's here.
posted by Rothko at 4:06 PM on January 5, 2006
Oh goody, the troll's here.
posted by Rothko at 4:06 PM on January 5, 2006
What, Billy Crystal wasn't available? :P
Actually, that's apparently the case: according to the LA Times and Variety, he was offered the gig but declined because of a heavy work schedule.
posted by littleme at 4:09 PM on January 5, 2006
Actually, that's apparently the case: according to the LA Times and Variety, he was offered the gig but declined because of a heavy work schedule.
posted by littleme at 4:09 PM on January 5, 2006
" Speaking for the rest of the world, why should we care?"
Could we see the document that appointed you as spokesperson for the rest???
and...
oh, never mind.... troll fed, move along
posted by HuronBob at 4:13 PM on January 5, 2006
Could we see the document that appointed you as spokesperson for the rest???
and...
oh, never mind.... troll fed, move along
posted by HuronBob at 4:13 PM on January 5, 2006
A great choice. The perfect choice. And the show will still suck.
posted by notmydesk at 4:13 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by notmydesk at 4:13 PM on January 5, 2006
Speaking for the rest of the world, why should we care?
Good point, 'cause no-one outside the US watches the Oscars.
posted by docgonzo at 4:23 PM on January 5, 2006
If I was one of Stewart's writers, I would pitch him on the "Oprah met Uma" joke and hope he just didn't catch the Oscars that year.
posted by sexymofo at 4:27 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by sexymofo at 4:27 PM on January 5, 2006
After watching the Daily show, watching Conan is like eating the day-old crusty rice at the bottom of the pan after eating a $500 meal at benihana and fucking devon aoki.
Stewart is the shit. But I would venture to say that there isn't a soul on earth that could make Conan look "day-old crusty rice."
posted by JPowers at 4:29 PM on January 5, 2006
Stewart is the shit. But I would venture to say that there isn't a soul on earth that could make Conan look "day-old crusty rice."
posted by JPowers at 4:29 PM on January 5, 2006
eating the day-old crusty rice at the bottom of the pan after eating a $500 meal at benihana and fucking devon aoki.
posted by longsleeves at 4:31 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by longsleeves at 4:31 PM on January 5, 2006
Why do that?
posted by longsleeves at 4:31 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by longsleeves at 4:31 PM on January 5, 2006
Jon Stewart's about the only thing interesting to me about the Oscars aside from the slow motion train wreck that is Joan Rivers.
Conan's decently funny but would pretty well suck balls as the Emcee.
posted by fenriq at 4:34 PM on January 5, 2006
Conan's decently funny but would pretty well suck balls as the Emcee.
posted by fenriq at 4:34 PM on January 5, 2006
I'll be the first to say it, I didn't think he was that funny at the Academy Awards. He's a lot better on the Daily Show when he's making fun of politics.
Everyone complains about the host anyway, I might as well start now.
posted by my sock puppet account at 4:38 PM on January 5, 2006
Everyone complains about the host anyway, I might as well start now.
posted by my sock puppet account at 4:38 PM on January 5, 2006
Nothing like being runner-up runner-up. Apperently he was the third choice, Chris Rock and Billy Crystal turned it down.
posted by tomplus2 at 4:39 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by tomplus2 at 4:39 PM on January 5, 2006
Speaking for the part of the world that isn't represented by Joeforking, we'd prefer Conan.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 4:50 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 4:50 PM on January 5, 2006
As much as I like Stewart, he's a political humorist. I just can't see him doing jokes about Nick & Jessica. I don't think it'll work. That said, here's to him doing a ridiculously offensive version of The Aristocrats involving some actor that Sean Penn respects.
posted by brundlefly at 4:52 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by brundlefly at 4:52 PM on January 5, 2006
Heh. This may be the only choice that will drive my mom more nuts than Chris Rock.
posted by scody at 4:53 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by scody at 4:53 PM on January 5, 2006
Hey, I might actually watch this year. Here's hoping Stewart isn't forced to tone down and blows because of it. Which is probably what will happen.
posted by kosher_jenny at 4:58 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by kosher_jenny at 4:58 PM on January 5, 2006
Crystal was only asked as a courtesy. He's doing a pretty decent Broadway show. (I am not a Billy Crystal fan! BTW.)
Come on now, Jon Stewart + BareBack Mountain + Goodnight and Good luck + whatever = Boy are we gonna talk some shit about USian politics and fuck some shit right up. The high-flying pinky-finger raising Hollywood folks are gonna love it! I'm there!!!!! And can't wait!!!!
Also, God bless Jon Stewart and his "fake" news/commentary.
posted by snsranch at 5:10 PM on January 5, 2006
Come on now, Jon Stewart + BareBack Mountain + Goodnight and Good luck + whatever = Boy are we gonna talk some shit about USian politics and fuck some shit right up. The high-flying pinky-finger raising Hollywood folks are gonna love it! I'm there!!!!! And can't wait!!!!
Also, God bless Jon Stewart and his "fake" news/commentary.
posted by snsranch at 5:10 PM on January 5, 2006
"and fucking devon aoki."
you're going to jail.
She's 23. She only looks like she's 13.
posted by mrgrimm at 5:14 PM on January 5, 2006
you're going to jail.
She's 23. She only looks like she's 13.
posted by mrgrimm at 5:14 PM on January 5, 2006
Also, Daily Show is overrated. I haven't seen him in a while, but I'd prefer Conan too.
posted by mrgrimm at 5:14 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by mrgrimm at 5:14 PM on January 5, 2006
I don't think that Stewart will be a success in hosting the Oscars. The Oscars have become a decidedly middle-brow event that is watched by average Americans who have little capacity for with or nuance. Stewart's brilliance will overwhelm those poor simpletons. They might understand how biting his commentary about the Bush Administration is on so many levels, and they might in their ignorance assume that the Academy Awards are not an appropriate forum for rapier-like, brilliant political commentary and satire.
posted by esquire at 5:20 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by esquire at 5:20 PM on January 5, 2006
Honestly I'd expect jon to just make jokes about the film industry, not the bush admin.
posted by delmoi at 5:25 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by delmoi at 5:25 PM on January 5, 2006
Count me in. If it's a train wreck, so much the funnier.
Oprah and Uma agree.
posted by meh at 5:27 PM on January 5, 2006
Oprah and Uma agree.
posted by meh at 5:27 PM on January 5, 2006
Yea, delmoi, yer probably right about that.
Can anyone tell me why she is so pop? Is it the cartoon character fetish thing?
posted by snsranch at 5:28 PM on January 5, 2006
Can anyone tell me why she is so pop? Is it the cartoon character fetish thing?
posted by snsranch at 5:28 PM on January 5, 2006
Jon Stewart is the only amusing thing to come out of (available to non WORLD SERIES viewers) the US in a long time.
posted by cassbrown1 at 5:34 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by cassbrown1 at 5:34 PM on January 5, 2006
President G. W. Bush should host. His quick wit works best in a scripted situation and his wry smirk would add just the right tone of uncomprehending us-versus-them divisiveness. Unfortunately, the broadcast would last way
past bedtime.
posted by longsleeves at 5:34 PM on January 5, 2006
past bedtime.
posted by longsleeves at 5:34 PM on January 5, 2006
That's not a wry smirk - the dumb bastard just doesn't know what is happening around him.
posted by cassbrown1 at 5:39 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by cassbrown1 at 5:39 PM on January 5, 2006
See, I actually believe George W. Bush would make a pretty decent Oscars host. Maybe in another timeline.
posted by furiousthought at 5:53 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by furiousthought at 5:53 PM on January 5, 2006
"Speaking for the rest of the world, why should we care?"
posted by Joeforking at 9:54 AM AEST on January 6.
By "the rest of the world", I assume you mean non-Americans. Well, I was one of the first posters in this thread, and I'm not American. I'm Australian. And I can say I definently care.
The Daily Show with Jon Stewart is a four-times-a-week pleasure that I can't live without. It may be mostly about US politics (which, given that sphere's global reach, is important enough for 'the rest of the world' to care about), but it also occasionally includes a wider view of the world, which I find refreshing coming from an American show. And I appreciate good wit and great humour, regardless of where in the world it comes from. Jon Stewart and the Daily Show is all of that.
So why should the rest of the world care? That's why. And given that in almost any given year, the Oscars constitute one long, boring, unimportant, self-serving wank-fest, any kind of refreshing personality like Stewart or Chris Rock should be interesting to anyone, even if the news isn't particuarly earth shattering or anything.
posted by Effigy2000 at 5:56 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by Joeforking at 9:54 AM AEST on January 6.
By "the rest of the world", I assume you mean non-Americans. Well, I was one of the first posters in this thread, and I'm not American. I'm Australian. And I can say I definently care.
The Daily Show with Jon Stewart is a four-times-a-week pleasure that I can't live without. It may be mostly about US politics (which, given that sphere's global reach, is important enough for 'the rest of the world' to care about), but it also occasionally includes a wider view of the world, which I find refreshing coming from an American show. And I appreciate good wit and great humour, regardless of where in the world it comes from. Jon Stewart and the Daily Show is all of that.
So why should the rest of the world care? That's why. And given that in almost any given year, the Oscars constitute one long, boring, unimportant, self-serving wank-fest, any kind of refreshing personality like Stewart or Chris Rock should be interesting to anyone, even if the news isn't particuarly earth shattering or anything.
posted by Effigy2000 at 5:56 PM on January 5, 2006
MetaFilter: eating the day-old crusty rice at the bottom of the pan after eating a $500 meal at benihana and fucking devon aoki.
posted by fixedgear at 6:06 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by fixedgear at 6:06 PM on January 5, 2006
They should've asked Joe Rogan.
But seriously, Jon Stewart was a comedian before sitting behind a desk - it was just acting that he was terrible at.
posted by travosaurus at 6:31 PM on January 5, 2006
But seriously, Jon Stewart was a comedian before sitting behind a desk - it was just acting that he was terrible at.
posted by travosaurus at 6:31 PM on January 5, 2006
This thread has been useful (in a sense, I suppose) for introducing me to this Devon Aoki person.
Other than that, well, not so much.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 6:36 PM on January 5, 2006
Other than that, well, not so much.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 6:36 PM on January 5, 2006
The Daily Show with Jon Stewart is a four-times-a-week pleasure that I can't live without
The Daily Show is on in Australia? Where and when, please.
posted by Jimbob at 6:42 PM on January 5, 2006
The Daily Show is on in Australia? Where and when, please.
posted by Jimbob at 6:42 PM on January 5, 2006
I watch the Daily Show whenever it's new, I enjoy it and I'll continue to watch it. That said, Jon Stewart is not funny in an Oscars presenter way. I don't believe he's capable of delivering the pre-written one-liners they'll give him (what's the name of that so-unfunny fellow who writes the jokes each show?).
It will be interesting none-the-less, he has a fine line to walk. Either do his schtick and appeal to those of us who watch him or delve into the ass kissing mode he does on interviews. I think a lot of it will have to do with how much material he's allowed to write and how much committee driven Viagra jokes he's forced to tell. The best would be if he were to gently make fun of the awards, the actors and Hollywood -- but we all know they are way too in love with themselves to let all but the most gentle jabbing get by.
Didn't they learn the whole ironic, smug New York comedian thing did not work the first time?
posted by geoff. at 6:46 PM on January 5, 2006
It will be interesting none-the-less, he has a fine line to walk. Either do his schtick and appeal to those of us who watch him or delve into the ass kissing mode he does on interviews. I think a lot of it will have to do with how much material he's allowed to write and how much committee driven Viagra jokes he's forced to tell. The best would be if he were to gently make fun of the awards, the actors and Hollywood -- but we all know they are way too in love with themselves to let all but the most gentle jabbing get by.
Didn't they learn the whole ironic, smug New York comedian thing did not work the first time?
posted by geoff. at 6:46 PM on January 5, 2006
I am actually looking foward to the Oscars! Please, oh please John, just ONE good Bush joke....
posted by sacrilicious at 6:52 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by sacrilicious at 6:52 PM on January 5, 2006
Who let the viral marketing agent for Devon Aoki and Benihana in the house?
posted by craniac at 6:52 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by craniac at 6:52 PM on January 5, 2006
I mean at least one, of course!
posted by sacrilicious at 6:52 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by sacrilicious at 6:52 PM on January 5, 2006
The Daily Show is on in Australia? Where and when, please.
The Daily Show shows in Australia on a channel called bittorrent. And, I believe it must be part of the the ABC - as there are no commercials.
posted by Dag Maggot at 6:54 PM on January 5, 2006
The Daily Show shows in Australia on a channel called bittorrent. And, I believe it must be part of the the ABC - as there are no commercials.
posted by Dag Maggot at 6:54 PM on January 5, 2006
The Daily Show with Jon Stewart is a four-times-a-week pleasure that I can't live without
The Daily Show is on in Australia? Where and when, please.
On your intarweb.
At least I learnt who Devon Aoki is. Attractive? Eww, if you like overfed little schoolgirls. Takes all kinds I guess.
posted by wilful at 6:56 PM on January 5, 2006
Eww, if you like overfed little schoolgirls.
Overfed?
Um, hardly.
posted by Meredith at 7:00 PM on January 5, 2006
Overfed?
Um, hardly.
posted by Meredith at 7:00 PM on January 5, 2006
"what's the name of that so-unfunny fellow who writes the jokes each show?"
That would be Bruce Vilanch, currently seen on VH1's Celebrity Fit Club 3, which is about fat celebrities trying to get fit, not fat celebrities having fits, which I think could be a ratings monster.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 7:02 PM on January 5, 2006
That would be Bruce Vilanch, currently seen on VH1's Celebrity Fit Club 3, which is about fat celebrities trying to get fit, not fat celebrities having fits, which I think could be a ratings monster.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 7:02 PM on January 5, 2006
I have hope for Jon...I saw him do stand up in Miami about ten years ago and he was fantastic. It was a college crowd and I don't remember there being any political jokes...he may be at his best when he is running a satarical scripted routine but even without those arrangements he is still fantastic. Now if the academy forces their own script on him...well then I just pity him...
posted by UMDirector at 7:02 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by UMDirector at 7:02 PM on January 5, 2006
Overfed? I never heard of Devon Aoki before today, but a little Google birdy tells me she's not exactly overfed.
posted by TochterAusElysium at 7:04 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by TochterAusElysium at 7:04 PM on January 5, 2006
Wondering which Oscar host has made the worst movies: Billy Crystal, Chris Rock, or Jon Stewart. My guess, they fall in that order, but "Mr. Saturday Night" and "My Giant" make this a tougher call than one might think.
posted by herc at 7:25 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by herc at 7:25 PM on January 5, 2006
I think just her cheeks are overfed. Oh, and I'm always disappointed with the host. Maybe Jon will change that.
posted by strangeleftydoublethink at 7:32 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by strangeleftydoublethink at 7:32 PM on January 5, 2006
Well, I haven't watched the Oscars since they snubbed Slapsy Maxie Rosenbloom (self-link) for his appearance in Skipalong Rosenbloom.
posted by Astro Zombie at 7:32 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by Astro Zombie at 7:32 PM on January 5, 2006
I'll watch, but I really don't think the host can do that much for the Oscars, maybe a monologue, and a few jokes here and there, but really the show is a lot of other actors talking about themselves and saying thank you, thank you, thank you, and tehn introducing other actors to do the same. Jon Stewart will make for a great opening, but I'd guess the rest of the show will be the same...we need to get some famous director/producer to direct/produce the Oscars. Could you imagine a Speilberg or Tarantino Oscars?!
posted by pithy comment at 7:33 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by pithy comment at 7:33 PM on January 5, 2006
Tarantino?
"All right, right, this is one of the most kick-ass movies of the year, riiight? I mean, when I was a movie geek working at a video store, we thought this guy was a genius, riiiiiggghhht? I mean, he makes films with the worl'd most badass villains, riiiggghhtt?
"Riggghhhhhttt?
"Ladies and gentleman, I give you my personal hero: Jerry Lewis!"
posted by Astro Zombie at 7:43 PM on January 5, 2006
"All right, right, this is one of the most kick-ass movies of the year, riiight? I mean, when I was a movie geek working at a video store, we thought this guy was a genius, riiiiiggghhht? I mean, he makes films with the worl'd most badass villains, riiiggghhtt?
"Riggghhhhhttt?
"Ladies and gentleman, I give you my personal hero: Jerry Lewis!"
posted by Astro Zombie at 7:43 PM on January 5, 2006
The Daily Show is funny. But it feels like 5.5 funny minutes with 24.5 minutes of commercials. No, I don't have a TIVO.
posted by jeff-o-matic at 7:52 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by jeff-o-matic at 7:52 PM on January 5, 2006
This is a little disappointing, but I'll be interested to see how it turns out. I like Jon as an outsider, able to sit back, take a look at a ridiculous place like Hollywood and point out how ridiculous it is. This is a little too inside, and it could definitely blunt some of his sharpness.
But good for him all the same.
posted by deafmute at 7:58 PM on January 5, 2006
But good for him all the same.
posted by deafmute at 7:58 PM on January 5, 2006
I expect that Conan will get the gig right around the time that he moves up to the Tonight Show. He already has signed a deal for that, and will be there in five or so years. I predict that he will become the Oscar host for a generation. He can get away with saying just about anything while still offending nobody. He also is an excellent writer, is tuned into celebrity goings-on, and will sing and dance. He is not afraid to look like an ass. Letterman will make himself look like an ass if he thinks that he secretly looks cool. Conan will make himself just look like an ass if he thinks it will be funny.
posted by flarbuse at 8:07 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by flarbuse at 8:07 PM on January 5, 2006
Now taking bets on which actor or actress is told
"Stop. You're hurting America."
posted by hank at 8:22 PM on January 5, 2006
"Stop. You're hurting America."
posted by hank at 8:22 PM on January 5, 2006
Overfed? I never heard of Devon Aoki before today, but a little Google birdy tells me she's not exactly overfed.
Gross, even worse. Fat faces on freaky scrawny bodies.
Anyhoo, Jon Stewart - from the little I've seen of him, quite a talent, and well up for the Oscars. Nobody outside of the US would have heard of him, but yeah it is a popular awards ceremony here in Aus (not that I've ever watched it).
posted by wilful at 8:24 PM on January 5, 2006
Perhaps Ms. Aoki should consider eating at Benihana.
posted by horsewithnoname at 8:35 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by horsewithnoname at 8:35 PM on January 5, 2006
Steve Martin should always host the Oscars.
posted by kirkaracha at 8:59 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by kirkaracha at 8:59 PM on January 5, 2006
That would be Bruce Vilanch, currently seen on VH1's Celebrity Fit Club 3, which is about fat celebrities trying to get fit, not fat celebrities having fits, which I think could be a ratings monster.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 7:02 PM PST on January 5
Apparently irrelevant nobody Jeff Conaway flips out in the next ep of CFC3 so it should do pretty well.
It's interesting: I watched the first episode, god help me, and Bruce Vilanch made absolutely no effort. I mean, all these resources at his disposal and he phones in like a bullshit 1' 6" in the fucking long jump. He is the laziest person I have ever seen, and it's pretty clear why. His confidence is non-existent, worse than anyone's I've ever seen, and he thinks that if he tries and fails that, what, I don't know, people are going to laugh at him, but not for his tepid one-liners and wacky red eyeglass frames. He reminds me of a lot of grossly overweight people forced to run or jump or participate in sports in any way - they do a purposefully shitty job to protect them from criticism, which only generates contempt and loathing from the people around them. I know because I sucked ass at sports as a youth and I did this shit until I was maybe seven and I realized that I sucked ass because I was afraid to try.
Attention, people who are doing that: QUIT. If you are at the gym and you are huffing and puffing on the treadmill, no one is going to criticize you. If you walk .5 mph while reading the newspaper and drinking soda, they will. Make an effort and you are an inspiration and a friend; fuck around and you are wasting everyone's time.
So anyway what's all this about Jon Stewart then?
posted by Optimus Chyme at 9:13 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by mr_crash_davis at 7:02 PM PST on January 5
Apparently irrelevant nobody Jeff Conaway flips out in the next ep of CFC3 so it should do pretty well.
It's interesting: I watched the first episode, god help me, and Bruce Vilanch made absolutely no effort. I mean, all these resources at his disposal and he phones in like a bullshit 1' 6" in the fucking long jump. He is the laziest person I have ever seen, and it's pretty clear why. His confidence is non-existent, worse than anyone's I've ever seen, and he thinks that if he tries and fails that, what, I don't know, people are going to laugh at him, but not for his tepid one-liners and wacky red eyeglass frames. He reminds me of a lot of grossly overweight people forced to run or jump or participate in sports in any way - they do a purposefully shitty job to protect them from criticism, which only generates contempt and loathing from the people around them. I know because I sucked ass at sports as a youth and I did this shit until I was maybe seven and I realized that I sucked ass because I was afraid to try.
Attention, people who are doing that: QUIT. If you are at the gym and you are huffing and puffing on the treadmill, no one is going to criticize you. If you walk .5 mph while reading the newspaper and drinking soda, they will. Make an effort and you are an inspiration and a friend; fuck around and you are wasting everyone's time.
So anyway what's all this about Jon Stewart then?
posted by Optimus Chyme at 9:13 PM on January 5, 2006
If he keeps the political schtick to a minimum he might be funny.
posted by HTuttle at 9:37 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by HTuttle at 9:37 PM on January 5, 2006
Evidently "round, unbelievably gorgeous face" equals "overfed." I'll just write that down in my little notebook of things that I had no idea about but probably should. Right next to "gravity" and "mortality."
posted by brundlefly at 10:09 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by brundlefly at 10:09 PM on January 5, 2006
How do you spend $500 at Benihana? Is this someone's idea of a fancy restaurant?
posted by Saucy Intruder at 10:09 PM on January 5, 2006
posted by Saucy Intruder at 10:09 PM on January 5, 2006
Nobody outside of the US would have heard of him ...
unless they're connected to the internet and were alive in the last 5 years.
I don't even have a television and I've heard of him and seen video (online).
posted by You Should See the Other Guy at 11:16 PM on January 5, 2006
unless they're connected to the internet and were alive in the last 5 years.
I don't even have a television and I've heard of him and seen video (online).
posted by You Should See the Other Guy at 11:16 PM on January 5, 2006
The only really funny way to do the Academy Awards would be to frame it, something like MST3K. Any joke that gets Academy approval is not going to be one of the jokes that need to be made.
posted by pracowity at 12:44 AM on January 6, 2006
posted by pracowity at 12:44 AM on January 6, 2006
I've only just been exposed to Jon Stewart now that More4 is showing episodes. He's a funny guy and has great delivery but if that's as biting as your political satire gets, then no wonder you have a runaway administration. Plus, I can't be the only one who thinks the daily show would be better without the "whore your book/film/whatever to the masses" section at the end.
But back to the point: I'm not sure he could carry the whole Oscars show. It's quite a long session and I haven't seen him really think on his feet yet.
Oh and I'm with pracowity on the MST3k version of the awards - I'd watch that.
posted by bouncebounce at 2:25 AM on January 6, 2006
But back to the point: I'm not sure he could carry the whole Oscars show. It's quite a long session and I haven't seen him really think on his feet yet.
Oh and I'm with pracowity on the MST3k version of the awards - I'd watch that.
posted by bouncebounce at 2:25 AM on January 6, 2006
Back when MST3K was on the Sci-fi Channel they did at least one Academy Awards spoof show. I'm pretty sure they used the standard promo clips that were available to everyone (because I can't really see James "Ego" Cameron giving the OK to "Sure, mock 'Titanic,' I'm fine with that...")
Jon Stewart was a pretty good stand-up, and not really a political one from what I remember. One of the things I like most about his Daily Show is that he seems to be enjoying himself, even in the Johnny Carson-esque, That Joke Was A Bomb, But We Knew That Going In And Went With It Anyway sort of thing.
If that same attitude carries over, the Oscars might merit a glance or two.
posted by Cyrano at 4:54 AM on January 6, 2006
Jon Stewart was a pretty good stand-up, and not really a political one from what I remember. One of the things I like most about his Daily Show is that he seems to be enjoying himself, even in the Johnny Carson-esque, That Joke Was A Bomb, But We Knew That Going In And Went With It Anyway sort of thing.
If that same attitude carries over, the Oscars might merit a glance or two.
posted by Cyrano at 4:54 AM on January 6, 2006
She's not overfed, she's Japanese!
(benihana is the only expensive resturant I could think of, and I'm pretty sure the founder is the father of Devon Aoki)
posted by delmoi at 6:33 AM on January 6, 2006
(benihana is the only expensive resturant I could think of, and I'm pretty sure the founder is the father of Devon Aoki)
posted by delmoi at 6:33 AM on January 6, 2006
Not to be cynical, but you know they only asked Stewart to host so they could try to get a certain demographic to start watching the Oscars. So the hell with them, I'm not going to watch. Partly because I don't like being manipulated and partly because, no matter how much I adore the Daily Show, I've seen Jon's standup routines and they were pretty excruciating. Without the desk in front of him he falls flat, for some reason.
posted by Dormant Gorilla at 6:47 AM on January 6, 2006
posted by Dormant Gorilla at 6:47 AM on January 6, 2006
What I really want is Stewart to moderate the next presidential debates.
HA! I would watch that.
posted by a3matrix at 7:02 AM on January 6, 2006
HA! I would watch that.
posted by a3matrix at 7:02 AM on January 6, 2006
The only way to make the show dynamic from start to finish is to eliminate about 1/2 the awards. It's pretty hard for any host to be great for 3 1/2-4 hours. If they pulled it down to 2 hours, anyone who hosts should be able to carry the show. Even David Letterman.
posted by Todd Lokken at 7:19 AM on January 6, 2006
posted by Todd Lokken at 7:19 AM on January 6, 2006
It seems that the story with Devon Aoki is a slightly creepy white male fascination with a half-asian *underfed* innocent, pretty girl permanently caked in some sort of slut makeup.
posted by snoktruix at 8:09 AM on January 6, 2006
posted by snoktruix at 8:09 AM on January 6, 2006
Nobody outside of the US would have heard of him ...
unless they're connected to the internet and were alive in the last 5 years.
I don't even have a television and I've heard of him and seen video (online).
Hardly. Granted, The Daily Show gets alot of mentions on Metafilter, but neither Stewart or his show are well know outside the US.
posted by the cuban at 8:52 AM on January 6, 2006
unless they're connected to the internet and were alive in the last 5 years.
I don't even have a television and I've heard of him and seen video (online).
Hardly. Granted, The Daily Show gets alot of mentions on Metafilter, but neither Stewart or his show are well know outside the US.
posted by the cuban at 8:52 AM on January 6, 2006
It seems that the story with Devon Aoki is a slightly creepy white male fascination with a half-asian *underfed* innocent, pretty girl permanently caked in some sort of slut makeup.
Being attracted to asians is creepy? What does that make her mom?
posted by delmoi at 8:56 AM on January 6, 2006
Being attracted to asians is creepy? What does that make her mom?
posted by delmoi at 8:56 AM on January 6, 2006
Being attracted to asians is creepy? What does that make her mom?
A slightly creepy, fascinated white male.
posted by cortex at 9:14 AM on January 6, 2006
A slightly creepy, fascinated white male.
posted by cortex at 9:14 AM on January 6, 2006
I've known plenty of guys who are pretty much exclusively attracted to Asians, because they're so cute and adorable and, uh, childlike, which IMO is a tad creepy. Seems like displaced paedophilia or something. That said, my girlfriend is in fact Korean.
posted by snoktruix at 9:14 AM on January 6, 2006
posted by snoktruix at 9:14 AM on January 6, 2006
Chuck Norris has only one rule: no Asian chicks.
posted by Dormant Gorilla at 9:37 AM on January 6, 2006
posted by Dormant Gorilla at 9:37 AM on January 6, 2006
I've known plenty of guys who are pretty much exclusively attracted to Asians, because they're so cute and adorable and, uh, childlike, which IMO is a tad creepy. Seems like displaced paedophilia or something. That said, my girlfriend is in fact Korean.
Um, good for you.
posted by delmoi at 10:27 AM on January 6, 2006
Um, good for you.
posted by delmoi at 10:27 AM on January 6, 2006
Stewart is great, and will be as trancendently awesome as the limitations of the Academy Awards (*yawn*) allow anyone to be.
Quentin Tarantino is an obnoxious weiner and a hack director, and I'd rather watch Abe Vigoda trim his own toenails than anything with Tarantino talking in it.
posted by stenseng at 10:29 AM on January 6, 2006
Quentin Tarantino is an obnoxious weiner and a hack director, and I'd rather watch Abe Vigoda trim his own toenails than anything with Tarantino talking in it.
posted by stenseng at 10:29 AM on January 6, 2006
Speaking for the rest of the world, why should we care?
Well THAT never gets old, does it folks?
posted by glenwood at 11:19 AM on January 6, 2006
Well THAT never gets old, does it folks?
posted by glenwood at 11:19 AM on January 6, 2006
Not to be cynical, but you know they only asked Stewart to host so they could try to get a certain demographic to start watching the Oscars. So the hell with them, I'm not going to watch.
That's not cynical. It IS, however, tremendously goofy.
posted by glenwood at 11:21 AM on January 6, 2006
snoktruix writes "I've known plenty of guys who are pretty much exclusively attracted to Asians, because they're so cute and adorable and, uh, childlike, which IMO is a tad creepy."
I know this guy who's into Asian chicks, but only Central Asians, like Kazakhs and Uzbeks.
posted by mr_roboto at 12:33 PM on January 6, 2006
I know this guy who's into Asian chicks, but only Central Asians, like Kazakhs and Uzbeks.
posted by mr_roboto at 12:33 PM on January 6, 2006
Those Central Asian girls are so hot I can barely Kazakhstan it.
posted by cortex at 1:38 PM on January 6, 2006
posted by cortex at 1:38 PM on January 6, 2006
This thread may only be limping along, but I thought I would share Dana Steven's (Slate) description of the three types of reactions that people are having to the announcement that Jon Stewart will host the oscars:
1. Yay!
2. Jon Stewart has sold out.
3. The choice of Stewart is proof that Hollywood is a seething vortex of Bush-bashing liberals (read: Jews).
Did we hit all of those?
posted by ND¢ at 1:58 PM on January 6, 2006
1. Yay!
2. Jon Stewart has sold out.
3. The choice of Stewart is proof that Hollywood is a seething vortex of Bush-bashing liberals (read: Jews).
Did we hit all of those?
posted by ND¢ at 1:58 PM on January 6, 2006
it feels like 5.5 funny minutes with 24.5 minutes of commercials
ditto.
posted by mrgrimm at 3:00 PM on January 6, 2006
ditto.
posted by mrgrimm at 3:00 PM on January 6, 2006
I know this guy who's into Asian chicks, but only Central Asians...
Maybe he wants to use their landing strips for incursions into the Fertile Crescent.
posted by pracowity at 3:13 PM on January 6, 2006
Maybe he wants to use their landing strips for incursions into the Fertile Crescent.
posted by pracowity at 3:13 PM on January 6, 2006
Kazakhs girls actualy look a lot like Chinese. In fact, most people can't tell the diffrence.
Just thought I'd throw that out there.
posted by delmoi at 3:28 PM on January 6, 2006
Just thought I'd throw that out there.
posted by delmoi at 3:28 PM on January 6, 2006
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posted by digaman at 3:33 PM on January 5, 2006