children of men
August 25, 2008 8:36 AM Subscribe
Where have all the real men gone? Kathleen Parker argues that feminism has neutered men and deprived them of their noble, protective role in society.
This post was deleted for the following reason: Usually the thing to do is to slop gasoline all over the place and then light a match, but that Parker article's a decent backup plan. Yikes. -- cortex
I think that we should all listen to Evstar.
posted by a robot made out of meat at 8:43 AM on August 25, 2008
posted by a robot made out of meat at 8:43 AM on August 25, 2008
The exemplar of the modern male is the hairless, metrosexualised man and decorator boys who turn heter-osexual slobs into perfumed ponies. All of which is fine as long as we can dwell happily in the Kingdom of Starbucks, munching our biscotti and debating whether nature or nurture determines gender identity. But in the dangerous world in which we really live, it might be nice to have a few guys around who aren’t trying to juggle pedicures and highlights.
Parker delights in knocking down straw men.
posted by lumensimus at 8:44 AM on August 25, 2008 [1 favorite]
Parker delights in knocking down straw men.
posted by lumensimus at 8:44 AM on August 25, 2008 [1 favorite]
If she were a man saying this, she would be treated as sexist. But since she is a woman, she must be speaking for all women.
posted by dances_with_sneetches at 8:44 AM on August 25, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by dances_with_sneetches at 8:44 AM on August 25, 2008 [1 favorite]
Where is my John Wayne?
Where is my prairie song?
Where is my happy ending?
Where have all the cowboys gone?
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 8:45 AM on August 25, 2008 [2 favorites]
Where is my prairie song?
Where is my happy ending?
Where have all the cowboys gone?
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 8:45 AM on August 25, 2008 [2 favorites]
"Honey, go fix the lawn—those feminists are ruining it!"
"Yes, dear."
posted by sixswitch at 8:46 AM on August 25, 2008 [1 favorite]
"Yes, dear."
posted by sixswitch at 8:46 AM on August 25, 2008 [1 favorite]
Gak. The bitch article makes a good point. The Parker article: do we have to? What flag do you use for "please, don't encourage them?"
posted by Miko at 8:46 AM on August 25, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by Miko at 8:46 AM on August 25, 2008 [1 favorite]
Sounds like somebody was on deadline, and needed to manufacture some column inches. But, ah, is she hawt?
posted by orthogonality at 8:47 AM on August 25, 2008
posted by orthogonality at 8:47 AM on August 25, 2008
I'm not really sure how this is different from the rest of the conservative cultural jeremiads I've read.
posted by StrikeTheViol at 8:47 AM on August 25, 2008
posted by StrikeTheViol at 8:47 AM on August 25, 2008
I remember the day the feminists came for my balls.
I knew it was going to happen. When we elected Hillary Clinton president in 2008, she filled the Excecutive Branch entirely with man hating, ferocious looking women who wrote the SCUM Manifesto into the constitution, outlawed all but butch/butch porn, and imposed a curfew -- every man must be at home with their doors locked by 10 pm, which is the moment when women would take back the streets, mostly for softball games.
I had spent the day cradling my testicles and talking to them, remembering the great times we had together. And then, the ring came at my door.
The procedure barely lasted three minutes. It was like watching a sheep get castrated, except it was no sheep; it was me. I spent the rest of the week in bed, crying and clutching my groin. And then, well, then things just sort of got back to normal. I noticed I wasn't as angry any more. I gained weight. My hair become softer and silkier. My voice went up a few pitches, and I joined a men's choir, although we were required by law to sing nothing but songs by Phranc and Melissa Ethridge, of course.
And then, the day came. Everyone should have known it was coming, but, somehow, nobody foresaw it. Finally, a week after the last man in America was castrated -- a mountain man who had hid out in a cave in rural Tennessee -- disaster struck.
It started with a jar of peanut butter. Nobody could open it. And then the pickle disaster. And then the tragedy of the Things on the Shelf That Were Too High to Reach. And then there was the incident with the Spider in the Bathroom. From there it just sort of snowballed.
The end will come any day now. And it won't come a moment too soon.
posted by Astro Zombie at 8:48 AM on August 25, 2008 [33 favorites]
I knew it was going to happen. When we elected Hillary Clinton president in 2008, she filled the Excecutive Branch entirely with man hating, ferocious looking women who wrote the SCUM Manifesto into the constitution, outlawed all but butch/butch porn, and imposed a curfew -- every man must be at home with their doors locked by 10 pm, which is the moment when women would take back the streets, mostly for softball games.
I had spent the day cradling my testicles and talking to them, remembering the great times we had together. And then, the ring came at my door.
The procedure barely lasted three minutes. It was like watching a sheep get castrated, except it was no sheep; it was me. I spent the rest of the week in bed, crying and clutching my groin. And then, well, then things just sort of got back to normal. I noticed I wasn't as angry any more. I gained weight. My hair become softer and silkier. My voice went up a few pitches, and I joined a men's choir, although we were required by law to sing nothing but songs by Phranc and Melissa Ethridge, of course.
And then, the day came. Everyone should have known it was coming, but, somehow, nobody foresaw it. Finally, a week after the last man in America was castrated -- a mountain man who had hid out in a cave in rural Tennessee -- disaster struck.
It started with a jar of peanut butter. Nobody could open it. And then the pickle disaster. And then the tragedy of the Things on the Shelf That Were Too High to Reach. And then there was the incident with the Spider in the Bathroom. From there it just sort of snowballed.
The end will come any day now. And it won't come a moment too soon.
posted by Astro Zombie at 8:48 AM on August 25, 2008 [33 favorites]
a few guys around who aren’t trying to juggle pedicures and highlights.
I know a pretty broad swath of guys, ranging from troglodytes to the ultra-effeminate and I don't think I know a single one who does either pedicures or highlights.
posted by jonmc at 8:48 AM on August 25, 2008 [1 favorite]
I know a pretty broad swath of guys, ranging from troglodytes to the ultra-effeminate and I don't think I know a single one who does either pedicures or highlights.
posted by jonmc at 8:48 AM on August 25, 2008 [1 favorite]
I had spent the day cradling my testicles and talking to them
I tried to do the same thing, but my nuts got bored and talked to eachother instead.
posted by jonmc at 8:49 AM on August 25, 2008 [1 favorite]
I tried to do the same thing, but my nuts got bored and talked to eachother instead.
posted by jonmc at 8:49 AM on August 25, 2008 [1 favorite]
Where have all the real men gone? Kathleen Parker argues that feminism has neutered men and deprived them of their noble, protective role in society.
Fuck that bitch.
Am I doing it right?
posted by billysumday at 8:49 AM on August 25, 2008
Fuck that bitch.
Am I doing it right?
posted by billysumday at 8:49 AM on August 25, 2008
Parker delights in knocking down straw men.
All whilst harboring a secret, unrequited love for said straw men. How tragic.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 8:50 AM on August 25, 2008
All whilst harboring a secret, unrequited love for said straw men. How tragic.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 8:50 AM on August 25, 2008
Or perhaps instead of perpetuating gender roles and stereotypes societies can move toward treating human beings as human beings and judge them on their individual merits and faults.
The war of the sexes is getting a little tiresome. Intelligent individuals should be able to discern positive and negative aspects of others' personalities regardless of gender and out-dated ways of perceiving peoples roles in society.
posted by Don't_deceive_with_belief at 8:51 AM on August 25, 2008
The war of the sexes is getting a little tiresome. Intelligent individuals should be able to discern positive and negative aspects of others' personalities regardless of gender and out-dated ways of perceiving peoples roles in society.
posted by Don't_deceive_with_belief at 8:51 AM on August 25, 2008
What a renegade! A true revolutionary! Where ever does she come up with such exciting and original notions?
Meh.
posted by Sys Rq at 8:52 AM on August 25, 2008
Meh.
posted by Sys Rq at 8:52 AM on August 25, 2008
...yet they are treated most unfairly in the areas of reproduction and parenting.
Legally, women hold the cards. If a woman gets pregnant, she can abort – even without her husband’s consent. If she chooses to have the child, she gets a baby and the man gets an invoice. Unarguably, a man should support his offspring, but by that same logic shouldn’t he have a say in whether his child is born or aborted?
Granted, many men are all too grateful for women to handle the collateral damage of poorly planned romantic interludes, but that doesn’t negate the fact that many men are hurt by the presumption that their vote is irrelevant in childbearing decisions.
For those that feel the need to say something about this point in this thread, I'll direct your attention to this thread in MeTa with 508 comments. It's an excellent introduction to this specific debate.
posted by Axle at 8:54 AM on August 25, 2008
Legally, women hold the cards. If a woman gets pregnant, she can abort – even without her husband’s consent. If she chooses to have the child, she gets a baby and the man gets an invoice. Unarguably, a man should support his offspring, but by that same logic shouldn’t he have a say in whether his child is born or aborted?
Granted, many men are all too grateful for women to handle the collateral damage of poorly planned romantic interludes, but that doesn’t negate the fact that many men are hurt by the presumption that their vote is irrelevant in childbearing decisions.
For those that feel the need to say something about this point in this thread, I'll direct your attention to this thread in MeTa with 508 comments. It's an excellent introduction to this specific debate.
posted by Axle at 8:54 AM on August 25, 2008
OK, maybe we haven't directly done this, but we've come really close.
posted by Science! at 8:54 AM on August 25, 2008
posted by Science! at 8:54 AM on August 25, 2008
If she were a man saying this, she would be treated as sexist. But since she is a woman, she must be speaking for all women.
What the FUCK are you talking about? Kathleen Parker is famous for her arrant sexism, which usually takes the form of profound, bitter misogyny--the fact that she's branching out into misandry for a change doesn't make her a favorite of women or feminists.
She's also racist and xenophobic and against the separation of church and state. NOBODY except her and her fellow self-loathing crazy women would ever in a million years suggest that she's "speaking for all women."
posted by Sidhedevil at 8:55 AM on August 25, 2008
What the FUCK are you talking about? Kathleen Parker is famous for her arrant sexism, which usually takes the form of profound, bitter misogyny--the fact that she's branching out into misandry for a change doesn't make her a favorite of women or feminists.
She's also racist and xenophobic and against the separation of church and state. NOBODY except her and her fellow self-loathing crazy women would ever in a million years suggest that she's "speaking for all women."
posted by Sidhedevil at 8:55 AM on August 25, 2008
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posted by Evstar at 8:39 AM on August 25, 2008