Regime change for the Big Orange.
April 1, 2007 7:50 PM Subscribe
Hear our demands: give us back New York. Just think of the possibilities! Join the struggle. Or else.
If the Dutch filled in the East River, where would the mob dump their bodies? The Meadowlands?
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 8:05 PM on April 1, 2007
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 8:05 PM on April 1, 2007
Just the ocean, probably.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 8:06 PM on April 1, 2007
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 8:06 PM on April 1, 2007
they've already got holland and grand rapids and haven't done shit with it ... what do they need new york for?
posted by pyramid termite at 8:06 PM on April 1, 2007
posted by pyramid termite at 8:06 PM on April 1, 2007
Of course, if the Dutch took over, the comedy clubs would immediately have to close.
posted by etaoin at 8:42 PM on April 1, 2007
posted by etaoin at 8:42 PM on April 1, 2007
Of course, if the Dutch do take over, we can simply buy Manhattan back for $23 worth of tulips.
posted by frogan at 8:44 PM on April 1, 2007
posted by frogan at 8:44 PM on April 1, 2007
Shouldn't it be "Give us back New Amsterdam!" ?
No, it should actually be "Give us back Nieuw Amsterdam!"
But the reason we got it from the Dutch a few hundred years back is cause it was such a pain in the ass to have to spell "new" with five frickin' letters, fer chrissake.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 8:49 PM on April 1, 2007
No, it should actually be "Give us back Nieuw Amsterdam!"
But the reason we got it from the Dutch a few hundred years back is cause it was such a pain in the ass to have to spell "new" with five frickin' letters, fer chrissake.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 8:49 PM on April 1, 2007
Might be kinda cool to spell it "Haarlem" again, though...
posted by flapjax at midnite at 8:50 PM on April 1, 2007
posted by flapjax at midnite at 8:50 PM on April 1, 2007
Actually, screw the Dutch. Let's just add extra vowels to every place in the five boroughs. Flaatbuush. Fluushing. Aastoria. Staaten Islaand. Centraal Paark. Cooneey Islaand.
posted by jonmc at 8:54 PM on April 1, 2007 [1 favorite]
posted by jonmc at 8:54 PM on April 1, 2007 [1 favorite]
You guys have never had DeRuijter Chocolate Sprinkles on bread and butter, have you? If you had, you'd want the Dutch back, pronto.
posted by maxwelton at 9:11 PM on April 1, 2007
posted by maxwelton at 9:11 PM on April 1, 2007
Next they'll want their ovens back, and then we won't be able to have any cake.
Give the Dutch something shiny, toss in a coupla Bjork CDs; they'll never know the difference.
posted by Dizzy at 9:15 PM on April 1, 2007
Give the Dutch something shiny, toss in a coupla Bjork CDs; they'll never know the difference.
posted by Dizzy at 9:15 PM on April 1, 2007
Awesome! I just took a vacation to Europe (inculding Amsterdam) last month. Makes me wish I was there again. Despite this, I must say that I like New York the way it is (although canals all over the city would be cool).
posted by ChestnutMonkey at 9:15 PM on April 1, 2007
posted by ChestnutMonkey at 9:15 PM on April 1, 2007
You guys have never had DeRuijter Chocolate Sprinkles on bread and butter, have you?
Overrated. It's all about the stroopwafels.
posted by Caviar at 9:23 PM on April 1, 2007 [1 favorite]
Overrated. It's all about the stroopwafels.
posted by Caviar at 9:23 PM on April 1, 2007 [1 favorite]
You'll have to take if from my cold, dead yuppie-condo-building chainstore-multiplying homogenizing douchebaggy twunt hands.
yes, I know, grind grind grind. except there's nowhere you can grind an axe outside of the sharper image and duane reade. And they only accept Yax brand* axes. And they** only sharpen them enough to cut jobs, not trees or much less arguments. Because there's no arguing with the free market, now is there?
I welcome the dutch. Coffeeshops. Waffles. Canals. Herring. For the love of god, sweet herring. Praatjes vullen geen gaatjes!!
*Yuppie axes of course.
** They won't let you sharpen your own ax. For fear of lawsuits.
posted by lalochezia at 9:35 PM on April 1, 2007
yes, I know, grind grind grind. except there's nowhere you can grind an axe outside of the sharper image and duane reade. And they only accept Yax brand* axes. And they** only sharpen them enough to cut jobs, not trees or much less arguments. Because there's no arguing with the free market, now is there?
I welcome the dutch. Coffeeshops. Waffles. Canals. Herring. For the love of god, sweet herring. Praatjes vullen geen gaatjes!!
*Yuppie axes of course.
** They won't let you sharpen your own ax. For fear of lawsuits.
posted by lalochezia at 9:35 PM on April 1, 2007
Sweet Mother of God I forgot about the herring.
Give 'em all a couple of "Best of a-ha" bootlegs and make sure they leave enough jars for every man-jack of us.
posted by Dizzy at 9:41 PM on April 1, 2007
Give 'em all a couple of "Best of a-ha" bootlegs and make sure they leave enough jars for every man-jack of us.
posted by Dizzy at 9:41 PM on April 1, 2007
It'd be nice if they knew how to resize images. The images in the second link are all multi-megapixel buggers quasi-resized with height and width attributes. Not even proportionately in some cases.
posted by George_Spiggott at 8:56 PM on April 1, 2007
posted by George_Spiggott at 8:56 PM on April 1, 2007
so this means New York would have even more fingers being put into dikes?
posted by drjimmy11 at 9:21 PM on April 1, 2007
posted by drjimmy11 at 9:21 PM on April 1, 2007
gnfti, what is a kroket? If it is good to eat, then I say you can have the Big Orange/New Amsterdam if you people will just learn a little restraint in the use of vowels.
Would you be interested in having Texas too?
posted by Cranberry at 10:54 PM on April 1, 2007
Would you be interested in having Texas too?
posted by Cranberry at 10:54 PM on April 1, 2007
Why did Constantinople get the works?
That's nobody's business but the jerks.
posted by Colloquial Collision at 11:21 PM on April 1, 2007
That's nobody's business but the jerks.
posted by Colloquial Collision at 11:21 PM on April 1, 2007
Cranberry writes "gnfti, what is a kroket? If it is good to eat, then I say you can have the Big Orange/New Amsterdam if you people will just learn a little restraint in the use of vowels."
You'll be able to taste them for yourself when Febo re-open all the old Horn and Hardart automats.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 12:04 AM on April 2, 2007
You'll be able to taste them for yourself when Febo re-open all the old Horn and Hardart automats.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 12:04 AM on April 2, 2007
Screw the Dutch, indeed. Give it back to the Lenape instead. The REAL owners. (Now that is a tribe that got screwed.)
posted by metasonix at 12:48 AM on April 2, 2007
posted by metasonix at 12:48 AM on April 2, 2007
They can have New Amsterdam - but not New Utrecht, Brooklyn will forever remain ours
posted by Flood at 3:15 AM on April 2, 2007
posted by Flood at 3:15 AM on April 2, 2007
They can have New Amsterdam - Brooklyn will forever remain ours.
But maybe as a gesture of goodwill to your neighbors to the north, you can start spelling it Breukelen again.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 3:39 AM on April 2, 2007
But maybe as a gesture of goodwill to your neighbors to the north, you can start spelling it Breukelen again.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 3:39 AM on April 2, 2007
At last New Yorkers will be able to get decent rijstaffel.
posted by languagehat at 5:19 AM on April 2, 2007
posted by languagehat at 5:19 AM on April 2, 2007
maxwelton writes "You guys have never had DeRuijter Chocolate Sprinkles on bread and butter, have you?"
You forgot the most awesome part: that's BREAKFAST.
posted by blag at 9:24 AM on April 2, 2007
You forgot the most awesome part: that's BREAKFAST.
posted by blag at 9:24 AM on April 2, 2007
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posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 7:50 PM on April 1, 2007