You are not a terrible person for wanting to break up with someone you love. You don’t need a reason to leave. Wanting to leave is enough. Leaving doesn’t mean you’re incapable of real love or that you’ll never love anyone else again. It doesn’t mean you’re morally bankrupt or psychologically demented or a nymphomaniac. It means you wish to change the terms of one particular relationship. That’s all. Be brave enough to break your own heart.
One Christmas at the very beginning of your twenties when your mother gives you a warm coat that she saved for months to buy, don’t look at her skeptically after she tells you she thought the coat was perfect for you. Don’t hold it up and say it’s longer than you like your coats to be and too puffy and possibly even too warm. Your mother will be dead by spring. That coat will be the last gift she gave you. You will regret the small thing you didn’t say for the rest of your life.
Dear Jeremy. Or Jake. Or Panama. Or afroblanca. Or Afroblanco. I know you like nicknames, but I don't know your age. So I'll just call you JP. Listen up.
None of the things that you think are your problems are actually problems. Nothing you think is urgent is actually urgent. Nothing that you think is necessary is actually necessary. Except for school. If you're in school right now, keep on going with that. It will do you good eventually.
Have more sex and less drugs. Realize that worry is something you do to keep yourself busy because you're afraid to tackle serious challenges. Take some time to define yourself. Seriously, listen to me. Take some time to decide on who you are, because right now you only define yourself in terms of what you aren't. Forget about counterculture, and instead try to engage with culture. Create something, don't just tear down other peoples' things. Someday you'll go digging through your past to find some kind of ideals that you betrayed, and you'll be disappointed to find that that you never had any.
What I said about the drugs? I meant that. Escapism can be fun and enriching, but it's still escapism. Stop running for a moment and catch your breath. What are you really running from?
Try to forgive other people. Try to forgive your family. Even if it doesn't work, you can at least say you tried. Don't do it for you, do it for me goddamn it, the 32-year-old you who never had the chance to make things right with your parents. Oh hell, you're not going to listen to me on this one.
Don't be so single-minded. Never be single-minded. Whatever you're working on is not important, and you'll regret treating people like crap. Single-minded determination is a way to build a career, but not a very fulfilling one.
That girl you're dating? Give her a chance. You know the one I'm talking about. She's not perfect, but they never are. Neither are you. If you never give yourself the chance to feel, how will you know what you're capable of?
Whatever it is you are thinking or doing, realize that every moment is just a moment and nothing more. It is not a place, it is not an eternity, it will not last forever. A moment is the most temporary thing there is. The past is not something you need to run from; in fact, it's the one thing you will never have to deal with again. And while you're busy building walls and holding grudges, everything you love is gradually being erased from existence.
« Older Forever Alone? No one to talk to? Not anymore! Cle... | Starship Schematics Database: ... Newer »
This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments
Buy a Shirt