Eva Braun's Private Photos
March 9, 2011 7:12 PM   Subscribe

LIFE presents: Eva Braun's Private Photos. The highlight of the collection: Eva as Al Jolson.
posted by nasreddin (82 comments total) 16 users marked this as a favorite

 
Eva as Al Jolson

Holy cow....
posted by magstheaxe at 7:16 PM on March 9, 2011 [2 favorites]


You'd think she was some sort of racist or something...
posted by yellowbinder at 7:17 PM on March 9, 2011 [9 favorites]


I assume Hitler's the one in the bear suit. And that, in the bear suit, he's in blackface.
posted by The World Famous at 7:18 PM on March 9, 2011 [14 favorites]


Is that the highlight or the lowlight?
posted by JohnnyGunn at 7:23 PM on March 9, 2011 [1 favorite]


NAZIBEAR EAT NAZIS OM NOM NOM
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 7:29 PM on March 9, 2011 [1 favorite]


Bear suit? Bear Jew!
posted by Halloween Jack at 7:30 PM on March 9, 2011 [1 favorite]


mammy's gonna be pissed.
posted by jonmc at 7:30 PM on March 9, 2011 [1 favorite]


I got annoyed when I saw the puppies in these pictures. Those tricky nazis! They know my immediate reaction to puppies is always positive.
I can console myself by remembering that even Hitler's puppies would have enjoyed playing catch with my Jewish self.
posted by Uppity Pigeon #2 at 7:32 PM on March 9, 2011


Racists gonna race. Or something.
posted by His thoughts were red thoughts at 7:36 PM on March 9, 2011


Wow
posted by zombieApoc at 7:37 PM on March 9, 2011


The first picture in the set gives me a very weird feeling. I wonder if Hitler took some of these?

Evil truly is banal.
posted by Decimask at 7:37 PM on March 9, 2011 [1 favorite]


It doesn't seem like she was bright or self aware enough to be a racist per se.
posted by sweetkid at 7:37 PM on March 9, 2011


So a Nazi lady pretending to be a Jewish dude pretending to be a black dude = EVIL,
But a Jewish dude pretending to be an Arab dude pretending to be a black dude = Hilarious!

Ok, then!
posted by lesli212 at 7:39 PM on March 9, 2011 [4 favorites]


The first picture in the set gives me a very weird feeling. I wonder if Hitler took some of these?

Yeah, I know what you mean. Although remember that is was taken in an era before celebrity magazines started printing upskirt photos of celebrities.

Racists gonna race. Or something.

White supremacists gonna fail their GED six times in a row?
posted by Uppity Pigeon #2 at 7:40 PM on March 9, 2011


Baroooo?
posted by Decimask at 7:41 PM on March 9, 2011


The above is @lesli212. I'm confused by you're comment.
posted by Decimask at 7:43 PM on March 9, 2011


you're your
posted by Decimask at 7:43 PM on March 9, 2011


I confess that I am confused as well.
posted by brundlefly at 7:45 PM on March 9, 2011


I love these found photo websites. It's so fun to imagine what these strangers were up to, and what sorts of lives they lived after the photos were taken.
posted by Stonestock Relentless at 7:46 PM on March 9, 2011 [12 favorites]


Fucking Nazis. Even the damned bear costume has to be blonde.
posted by Dr. Zira at 7:47 PM on March 9, 2011


You know who also had private photos?

Oh wait -- he's right there.
posted by Capt. Renault at 7:48 PM on March 9, 2011 [17 favorites]


classic Ali G: you're welcome (I actually DO think he's hilarious)
posted by lesli212 at 7:50 PM on March 9, 2011


White supremacists gonna fail their GED six times in a row?

Well, yes. But it lacks pith.
posted by His thoughts were red thoughts at 7:50 PM on March 9, 2011


Well, yes. But it lacks pith.

Well, "Lacks pith" is on my business card, to be fair. Along with "Will never learn how to drive a stick shift."
posted by Uppity Pigeon #2 at 7:52 PM on March 9, 2011


Well this really lightens the place up.
posted by zippy at 7:57 PM on March 9, 2011 [12 favorites]


Well this really lightens the place up.

Yeah, I found that one particularly creepy. I mean, if one were to put a portrait of one's significant other on the wall, I'm not sure a disembodied head is the right choice to tie the room together.
posted by Dr. Zira at 8:00 PM on March 9, 2011 [1 favorite]


I'm trying to parse the fact that life.com has a "fark it" link on their photos along with the other social media sharing icons...
posted by randomkeystrike at 8:04 PM on March 9, 2011 [5 favorites]


Braun was a fan of American movies, including Gone with the Wind.

No kidding.
posted by orange swan at 8:04 PM on March 9, 2011


zippy, I agree, that photograph is fantastic.. the rest, pretty much typical family vacation photos...
posted by tomswift at 8:05 PM on March 9, 2011


I mean, if one were to put a portrait of one's significant other on the wall, I'm not sure a disembodied head is the right choice to tie the room together.

I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that, when one chooses Hitler as a significant other, there's a pretty good chance that one's tastes are somewhat divergent from the norm in other areas, as well, including interior decorating.
posted by The World Famous at 8:06 PM on March 9, 2011 [2 favorites]


It doesn't seem like she was bright or self aware enough to be a racist per se.

I'm amused by the idea that you need to be bright or self aware to be racist.

She was the racist ladyfriend of the Führer himself, while also being a human being who enjoyed parties and bear costumes and puppies. The world is a funny place.
posted by Sticherbeast at 8:08 PM on March 9, 2011 [3 favorites]


A mentor of mine once said that Hitler comes back into fashion every ten years.

I think time is speeding up.
posted by artof.mulata at 8:14 PM on March 9, 2011


The bear was Stalin, of course.
posted by Burhanistan at 8:17 PM on March 9, 2011 [1 favorite]


In Berchtesgaden, the first time

Now that inscription is chilling.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 8:17 PM on March 9, 2011


There's something about this picture that I find incredibly ominous. The little "x" is just so...loaded.
posted by the painkiller at 8:24 PM on March 9, 2011


Well this really lightens the place up.

...Holly?
posted by galadriel at 8:34 PM on March 9, 2011 [1 favorite]


I got annoyed when I saw the puppies in these pictures.

I always felt kind of sorry for Hitler's dog. She didn't know she was Hitler's dog. She just wanted a doggy treat and a scratch behind the ears.
posted by marxchivist at 8:38 PM on March 9, 2011 [23 favorites]


What's that they say about the banality of evil?

Except the Zardoz like head in the last photo, that's just plain evil looking no matter who you display like that. :\ (i do half expect it to shout slogans and dispense guns too)
posted by usagizero at 8:41 PM on March 9, 2011 [2 favorites]


Hitler's dog was a bodhisattva trying desperately to redeem him.
posted by Burhanistan at 8:43 PM on March 9, 2011 [11 favorites]


I'm amused by the idea that you need to be bright or self aware to be racist.

I know, I felt like I didn't explain myself fully. Not excusing her -- it just seems from the photo captions and the photos themselves that she was kind of heartless, frivolous and oblivious, rather than adhering to the Nazi principles or whatnot. At any rate, this is a fascinating look at some truly monstrous people.
posted by sweetkid at 8:46 PM on March 9, 2011


I've seen that bear before!
posted by unliteral at 8:46 PM on March 9, 2011


The Jolson one is frickin' creepy, as is the Hitler portrait. But then, the rest, as mentioned above, are banal. They all look like these normal folks, hanging out and having fun together.

Which, I guess, is even creepier.
posted by misha at 8:52 PM on March 9, 2011 [1 favorite]


A little googling turns up more on that Nazi Bear.
posted by unliteral at 8:58 PM on March 9, 2011 [3 favorites]


A little googling turns up more on that Nazi Bear.

This picture absolutely cracks me up. Probably because I imagine that he just dove into the frame at the last minute, and he's posing that way because he's mid-slide.

I always felt kind of sorry for Hitler's dog. She didn't know she was Hitler's dog. She just wanted a doggy treat and a scratch behind the ears.

Exactly. Dogs can do bad things, but I don't think they're psychologically capable of evil. If a dog pees on your grave, it isn't personal. They just had to pee and hey! grass!
posted by Uppity Pigeon #2 at 9:03 PM on March 9, 2011


The Jolson one is frickin' creepy

Doesn't seem particularly creepy, just an artifact from a bygone era. I wonder how many Mefites grandparents or great-grandparents may have dressed as the The Jazz Singer for a costume party. I do agree that the floating Hitler head is rather off-putting. Looks like the cover of his debut album "Meet der Führer!"
posted by the_artificer at 9:08 PM on March 9, 2011 [8 favorites]


> Hitler's dog was a bodhisattva trying desperately to redeem him.

That premise would have made for a much better sitcom than Heil Honey I'm Home!
posted by The Card Cheat at 9:09 PM on March 9, 2011


a Jewish dude pretending to be an Arab dude pretending to be a black dude

Jesus Christ!
posted by joe lisboa at 9:12 PM on March 9, 2011 [5 favorites]


For some reason, I can't look at that disembodied Hitler head portrait and not think of this.
posted by Atom Eyes at 9:12 PM on March 9, 2011 [3 favorites]


Uppity Pigeon #2: "A little googling turns up more on that Nazi Bear.

This picture absolutely cracks me up.
"

A Nazi photo bomb?
posted by bwg at 9:18 PM on March 9, 2011


For some reason, I can't look at that disembodied Hitler head portrait and not think of this.

Holly from Red Dwarf was my first thought.
posted by deadwax at 9:22 PM on March 9, 2011


I had a dream once that a real estate agent took me to look at a rental apartment in Hell. A little trapdoor opened up in the middle of Times Square and you went right down into Hell. The place was $150 a month, but there was fire everywhere and Hitler and Eva were neighbors. This was my first year in NYC and I think that says it all.
posted by sweetkid at 9:53 PM on March 9, 2011


Ok, y'all absconded with my first impressions, but I'd like to add this one to the repertoire of comparisons to picture number twenty nine.

Damn. I wanted to also add one of Charlie Sheen, but even at his most deranged looking he manages a crude charm that is utterly absent in the wall pic of you-know-who.
posted by Xoebe at 9:56 PM on March 9, 2011


you-know-who.

Voldemort?
posted by The World Famous at 10:00 PM on March 9, 2011


Dass es keine regelmäßigen tragen, dass ein Eisbär!
posted by puny human at 10:20 PM on March 9, 2011


Disembodied Hitler portrait is in fact a famous election poster.

Which, BTW, reminds me of a more recent famous election poster...
posted by Skeptic at 10:54 PM on March 9, 2011


the Führer himself, while also being a human being who enjoyed parties and bear costumes and puppies. The world is a funny place.

Not really; I dislike those things, and distrust any who enjoy them. Yes, I am less fun than Hitler, and am not afraid to say so.

She didn't know she was Hitler's dog. She just wanted a doggy treat and a scratch behind the ears.

You poor, deluded fool. "Aw, she's wants to shake a paw! Oh oh, you're reaching a little high there, Blondi!"
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 11:14 PM on March 9, 2011


Here is the election poster Skeptic was trying to link to. It’s very much Bauhaus inspired and looks awfully modern, not at all like other posters of the era, not even like most other Nazi posters.

Here is a whole collection of election posters from 1932 (you can also navigate to other years). The Nazi posters are stylistically all over the place, one (“Our Last Hope: Hitler”), two (“Marxism Is the Guardian Angel of Capitalism. Vote National Socialists.”), three (“Only Hitler”), four (“Hitler Builds Up”), five (“Work and Bread”).

Some posters of other political parties are uncannily foreshadowing: Here is one from the Social Democrats, reading “The Third Reich? No!”
posted by michael.ka at 11:32 PM on March 9, 2011 [2 favorites]


From Unliterals link, this made me giggle: "They are too thin and too young for reeanctors". Sorry...
posted by Harald74 at 11:53 PM on March 9, 2011


Bet she couldn't sing "Swanee" half as good as ol' Al, though.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 1:20 AM on March 10, 2011


For some reason, I can't look at that disembodied Hitler head portrait and not think of this.

This is the one that jumped to my mind first.
posted by palbo at 2:13 AM on March 10, 2011


...that disembodied Hitler head portrait...

Wall Hitler is watching you invade Poland.
posted by A Thousand Baited Hooks at 2:34 AM on March 10, 2011 [4 favorites]


The Hitler floating head makes me imagine that he's operating one of the Spider Slayer robots from 1980's Spiderman comics that projected the operator's face but not his throat. Black turtleneck? There's a fine line between evil scientist, Hitler and beatnik, I guess.
posted by Mayor Curley at 3:37 AM on March 10, 2011


I can't get over how absolutely infuriating these snapshots are, even the ones that just feature Braun. That fact that she and Hitler killed themselves is frigging tragic for the rest of humanity. Why couldn't they have stuck with their hubris until it was too late? It would have been a much more satisfying story of the Soviets had captured them. You know Stalin had been daydreaming about what he was going to do with them. I bet Stalin found himself standing in the shower, wondering how long he had been there, because he was totally absorbed in imagining what he was going to do with those two shitheads when his troops stormed the bunker. Even if we never found exactly what he did, we could have some satisfaction in knowing that it was absolutely excellent and fitting for those monsters.
posted by Mayor Curley at 3:47 AM on March 10, 2011


Hitler don't satisfy. Make infuriation.
posted by unliteral at 5:02 AM on March 10, 2011 [1 favorite]


An acquaintance was just showing me some photos of a smiling Hitler. Apparently (according to the article) most of the archive photos of Hitler show him smiling, not evilly menacing or spittle-emittingly haranguing. We see the latter more often because it fits the narrative but we'd probably be better served by hearing the narrative and seeing the smiling.

And on the flip side, most of the archives of child labor apparently also show smiling children. But you can hardly wage a campaign against child exploitation based on smiley they are. (I'm not saying the children were actually happy in their conditions. If anything, they were probably happy to be NOT working that day because the photographer was there.) Again, we'd probably be better served seeing those "happy" pictures if only to blunt the "but look how happy they are!" propaganda used in support of sweatshops and other terrible working conditions today.
posted by DU at 5:04 AM on March 10, 2011 [2 favorites]


Hitler smiled.
posted by unliteral at 5:15 AM on March 10, 2011 [1 favorite]


TIL: I have something in common with Eva Braun; I like to smoke, but only when Hitler is not around.
posted by Dumsnill at 5:16 AM on March 10, 2011 [11 favorites]


Blackface and furries! My god they're evil incarnate.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 5:22 AM on March 10, 2011


Well this really lightens the place up.

"Hitler, Hitler, on the wall, whose the most über of them all?"
posted by chambers at 5:24 AM on March 10, 2011 [1 favorite]


I personally love this picture - what an amazing shot!
posted by jillithd at 7:30 AM on March 10, 2011


Disembodied Hitler portrait is in fact a famous election poster.

The poster has a dot over the "i" in the all-caps "HITLER." He was history's greatest typographic monster!
posted by kirkaracha at 8:05 AM on March 10, 2011 [1 favorite]


anyone else disturbed by the presence of a thumbs-up "Like" button at the bottom of all of these?!?! i know he was loved by children and puppies but seriously.... so inappropriate.
posted by kuppajava at 9:20 AM on March 10, 2011


Not sure "like" buttons are all that different from favorites on MeFi: "I find this interesting or amusing or disturbing or awful or at least noteworthy or whatever. Oh, look - there's a handy button."
posted by Dumsnill at 9:33 AM on March 10, 2011


Hitler's gonna Hitle
posted by banshee at 10:47 AM on March 10, 2011 [3 favorites]


You know who else took pictures of Eva Braun?
posted by Astro Zombie at 10:48 AM on March 10, 2011


WHOLLY MOLEY old man Braun had a Kodak and worked for the boss.
posted by clavdivs at 11:01 AM on March 10, 2011


Somehow I never knew that Blondi the dog was a German Shepherd. Bummer.

...but not a surprise, I guess.
posted by COBRA! at 11:18 AM on March 10, 2011


There is motion picture film, too.
posted by zoinks at 11:23 AM on March 10, 2011


OH MAMMY. That's something.
posted by Mael Oui at 7:54 PM on March 10, 2011


The framed disembodied head portrait is different than the campaign poster disembodied head portrait.
posted by zippy at 10:07 PM on March 10, 2011


A twist...
posted by Alexandra Kitty at 1:08 PM on March 11, 2011 [2 favorites]


Yes, actually Life ran some of the same photos in 1947 including the Al Jolson one. But the new page is certainly easier to view.
posted by interplanetjanet at 7:30 PM on March 13, 2011


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