Gauss proved quadratic reciprocity when he was 18, and devised at least 8 proofs of it over his lifetime.
(Oh wait, that's actually true!) posted by kmz at 7:46 AM on April 21, 2011 [1 favorite]
But he refuses to show his workings.
Bah, that's that poseur Fermat. Gauss could outmath Fermat any day of the week, and Aleph_null times on Sunday. posted by kmz at 7:48 AM on April 21, 2011
They say Riemann is the name Gauss used to publish some unsatisfied papers.
Gauss can find a bijection between the integers and the reals.
Gauss knows what the biggest number is.
Gauss can regauss a monitor. posted by kmz at 8:15 AM on April 21, 2011 [1 favorite]
Oh, okay, that explains why I got really, really stupid a few years ago. Someone must have used a degausser on my head. posted by seanmpuckett at 8:28 AM on April 21, 2011
The thing I perhaps love most about the internet is the ability for me to see really obscure jokes in a context where they're actually funny. posted by GuyZero at 9:57 AM on April 21, 2011
Gauss can solve the diffusion equation backwards posted by milestogo at 10:03 AM on April 21, 2011
Gauss doesnt use c, he can determine the constant of integration. posted by milestogo at 10:06 AM on April 21, 2011
These are interesting because unlike chuck norris facts where you can be as fantastical and imaginative as you want, you have to walk a fine line here between mathematical plausibility on one hand and something that is techinically impossible on the other (otherwise, mathematically speaking, anyone can usually do it )
For instance, somthing like "gauss can divide by 0" doesn't really work for me because there is simply no meaning in it, whereas something like the bijection from the integers to the reals above works because even though it is impossible it has some meaning.
Also, this is not a hard thing:
Gauss can prove two theorems with one proof. posted by milestogo at 10:23 AM on April 21, 2011
Gauss can sum the integers from 1 to 100 as a child. posted by Obscure Reference at 10:44 AM on April 21, 2011
Gauss can sum the integers from 1 to 100 as a child.
posted by Obscure Reference
That is an obscure reference, and that's how I learned it, too (from my parents' Reader's Digest), but a few years ago I read somewhere that the problem the teacher posed was to sum 100 consecutive integers starting with a larger number, as I recall (exceedingly unreliably) 1801.
One thing Gauss could not do, evidently, was bring himself to publish his invention of non-Euclidean geometry a decade or two ahead of the works of Riemann, Lobachevsky and Bolyai, thereby depriving himself of what would have been one of the most lastingly brilliant jewels in his dazzling crown hoard.
Strange a mathematician and physicist that preeminent would be so dependent on amour-propre, and doubly ironic considering how concerned he was to establish his priority in everything else he did. posted by jamjam at 1:32 PM on April 21, 2011
An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar.
The first says, "I'll have a beer."
The second says, "I'll have one half of a beer."
The third says, "I'll have one fourth of a beer."
The bartender pulls out two bottles and says, "Fuck you guys." posted by exogenous at 2:59 PM on April 21, 2011 [3 favorites]
This made me laugh loudly enough to get my roommate to look at me funny. Thank you.
Gauss found BB(6), but his publisher refused to print it. I suspect said publisher ran out of paper. posted by Hactar at 5:09 PM on April 21, 2011
Chuck Norris jokes are funny because they are ironic. Chuck Norris is not actually a badass but he played one in some bad movies and TV shows, so it's funny to pretend he is.
Gauss really was a mathematical badass (one of the top 4 or 5 mathematically geniuses of all time for sure, arguably #1 or #2), so pretending he's marginally better than that isn't very funny.
(My list, in no particular order: Euclid (depending), Archimedes, Gauss, Euler and Newton.) posted by DU at 4:40 AM on April 22, 2011
I ā„ eāx2!
Don't worry. It's perfectly normal.
I was born this way. Wrong thread? posted by Mental Wimp at 7:48 AM on April 22, 2011
I guess I just have stats on the brain. Maybe I should have posted it this way:
Chuck Norris jokes are funny because they are ironic.
That's not why Chuck Norris jokes are funny. They're funny because witty exaggeration is funny. A good Chuck Norris joke is equally funny if you put someone else's name in the Chuck Norris spot. posted by straight at 11:59 AM on April 22, 2011
I guess I just have stats on the brain. Maybe I should have posted it this way:
Don't worry, it's perfectly normal.
Yep, I got the pun the first time. Gaussian kernel and all. posted by Mental Wimp at 12:20 PM on April 26, 2011
Ah well, not only do I have stats on the brain, I seem to have teaching stats on the brain, and seem to need to MAKE ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN that MY POINT IS NOT BEING MISSED. Apologies for the un-subtlety. posted by benito.strauss at 8:55 AM on April 27, 2011 [1 favorite]
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But he refuses to show his workings.
posted by le morte de bea arthur at 7:43 AM on April 21, 2011