Pitcher’s Treatment Draws Scrutiny

May 12, 2011 9:53 AM

Bartolo Colon, now of the New York Yankees, underwent a controversial stem-cell treatment in the Dominican Republic to regain his old form.
posted by reenum (23 comments total)

MLB is looking into it because it seems to be the first of its kind. Not sure that it's really "controversial". The only controversial thing seems to be that the doc has used HGH in the past, but didn't in this case (so he claims).
posted by inigo2 at 9:58 AM on May 12, 2011

It was an autologous stem cell transplant (i.e., his own cells from elsewhere in his body where placed in his elbow and shoulder). This is not, in my opinion, nearly as controversial as the autologous blood transfer that has been used to cheat in cycling events.
posted by exogenous at 10:02 AM on May 12, 2011

Christ, what a colon.
posted by joe lisboa at 10:12 AM on May 12, 2011

"Hey Doc, can I get that Colon surgery?"
posted by BrotherCaine at 10:13 AM on May 12, 2011

HIS LAST NAME IS LIKE A BUTTHOLE.
posted by (Arsenio) Hall and (Warren) Oates at 10:13 AM on May 12, 2011 [5 favorites]

I could go for a nice controversial stem-cell treatment about now.
posted by StickyCarpet at 10:15 AM on May 12, 2011

I assume full blame for rectal punning. I apologize.

Christ, I am the asshole.
posted by joe lisboa at 10:16 AM on May 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

HIS LAST NAME IS LIKE A PUJOLS.
posted by Hoopo at 10:16 AM on May 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

His old form? Was he like a Minotaur or something?
posted by Eideteker at 10:16 AM on May 12, 2011 [6 favorites]

No, but he was strong like bull.
posted by Nomyte at 10:20 AM on May 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

HIS LAST NAME IS LIKE A BUTTHOLE.

Stem cells can turn into anything!
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 10:24 AM on May 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

He went AWOL from the Red Sox, IIRC. The last name applies.
posted by Melismata at 10:29 AM on May 12, 2011

"He went AWOL from the Red Sox, IIRC. The last name applies." [emphasis mine]

This is what I love (not really) about Red Sox fans. So much hatred, yet none of that energy can be diverted to fact-check that the hatred is justified (which, in this case, it still wouldn't be).
posted by Eideteker at 10:49 AM on May 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

Is this somehow different than taking a tendon from your left arm to replace your right UCL, like they do in Tommy John surgery?
posted by IanMorr at 11:18 AM on May 12, 2011

Okay, I have to give in to my 'Grawr' and say "What the fuck?!"

Not to the story itself, but the framing. The OP says "controversial treatment", the NYT title says "Disputed Treatment"... yet unless I glossed over it this is completely unsupported by the article or the story. What controversy? What dispute? From what I can tell, this procedure is:

• Fairly new, even pioneering... but completely legal
• Not regulated by federal or state law in terms of who can use this procedure
• Not implicitly or explicitly prohibited by MLB rules or union agreements
• As IanMorr notes, is functionally no different than the very common TJ surgery in the sense that it's not about foreign agents or designer drugs- and plenty of players have had unnecessary elective surgery including TJ or laser vision correction

So I have to ask, "Where's the controversy? Where's the dispute?".

People, this kind of sloppy language is what helped get us a War on Drugs, and it's how we end up with overly broad rules in sports that disqualify athletes for using nasal spray or OTC aspirin, while so-called sports "journalists" engage in hand-wringing about PEDs and other national crises. Ugh.
posted by hincandenza at 11:53 AM on May 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

He went AWOL from the Red Sox, IIRC. The last name applies

Well, he was pretty much useless before he left, so why bother holding a grudge? Are you still upset with Jay Payton too?
posted by yerfatma at 12:04 PM on May 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

Is there some sort of stem-cell bath I can soak in? Man, to feel 20 again.
posted by maxwelton at 12:39 PM on May 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

You guys know his last name is pronounced co-LONE, right?
posted by dirigibleman at 12:43 PM on May 12, 2011

Shamefully, I do, dirigibleman. But if it is any consolation, my juvenile antics evidently pissed someone off enough to de-favorite some other comments. Off to cry the sweet, sweet tears of a Tigers fan.
posted by joe lisboa at 12:47 PM on May 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

"You guys know his last name is pronounced co-LONE, right?"

HIS LAST NAME IS LIKE A BUTTHOLE PERFUME.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 2:30 PM on May 12, 2011 [5 favorites]

Man, I wish my name was a punctuation mark.
posted by box at 5:07 PM on May 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

Stem cell procedure nothing new

If stem cells open a new can of worms, then it should have been opened a long time ago. And we'd better add a bunch of other players who have had a stem cell procedure to the scrutiny list. To name just a few: Indians' outfielder Grady Sizemore; Saints' safety Darren Sharper; and here's your All-NBA stem cell first team: Jason Kidd, Tracy McGrady, Amar'e Stoudemire, Allan Houston, and Kenyon Martin.

These are all athletes who have had microfracture surgery, which is a stem cell procedure.

posted by inigo2 at 5:05 AM on May 13, 2011

It's all really small beer compared to Robin van Persie's horse placenta deal.
posted by yerfatma at 6:11 AM on May 13, 2011