Join 3,418 readers in helping fund MetaFilter (Hide)


VintageJS: 100% retro, 0% hipster
August 22, 2011 5:26 AM   Subscribe

Slap some retro on those photos with vintageJS.

Programmers might be interested in this HTML 5/jQuery experiment's GitHub repos.
posted by Foci for Analysis (34 comments total) 8 users marked this as a favorite

 
A warning: some of the "Recent photos" are very NSFW.
posted by Philosopher Dirtbike at 5:33 AM on August 22, 2011


Are you positive this is 0% hipster? I need to be sure. Even a trace amount could contaminate the entire sample.
posted by theodolite at 5:53 AM on August 22, 2011 [6 favorites]


So...Hipstamatic as re-invented for the web by geeks using javascript?
posted by Thorzdad at 5:59 AM on August 22, 2011


Yeah, there's a vagina up close and personal.
posted by jwhite1979 at 6:08 AM on August 22, 2011


Clever but unnecessary.
posted by tommasz at 6:17 AM on August 22, 2011


Yeah, there's a vagina up close and personal.

But you must admit it's a charmingly poignant vagina.
posted by Honorable John at 6:18 AM on August 22, 2011 [2 favorites]


Argh. I am so, so, so sick of seeing these things in my Facebook and Twitter feeds. Hipstamatic, Instagram, even Cutestagram (for pets). We didn't need another one, did we?
posted by Gator at 6:44 AM on August 22, 2011 [2 favorites]


But you must admit it's a charmingly poignant vagina.

No question. We spoke for several minutes about this morning's Democracy Now and the battle for Tripoli. Really insightful.
posted by jwhite1979 at 6:54 AM on August 22, 2011


It's in-page image processing, and it's great. Don't be scared of the Holga.
posted by hanoixan at 6:55 AM on August 22, 2011


This faux-vintage photo thing is taking way too long to go away. Can we go back to taking clear, sharp, well-lit pictures real soon now?
posted by octothorpe at 7:01 AM on August 22, 2011 [4 favorites]



Yeah, there's a vagina up close and personal.

WHERE?
posted by the noob at 7:09 AM on August 22, 2011 [3 favorites]


This faux-vintage photo thing is taking way too long to go away. Can we go back to taking clear, sharp, well-lit pictures real soon now?

I hope not. Maybe it'll help if you don't think of it as faux-vintage, rather as an authentic form of a style you don't like. It might make the time pass more quickly.

Anyone have any advice on how to achieve similar effects with Photoshop?
posted by jwhite1979 at 7:10 AM on August 22, 2011


Don't be scared of the Holga.

Until I looked it up, I figured 'Holga' was some kind of slang for 'vagina' that I'd never heard.
posted by Philosopher Dirtbike at 7:11 AM on August 22, 2011 [2 favorites]


WHERE?

Looks like that particular pelvis has left the building, but I've seen a few others scattered around the gallery.
posted by jwhite1979 at 7:16 AM on August 22, 2011


Maybe it'll help if you don't think of it as faux-vintage

Maybe it would help if my parents didn't have dozens and dozens of old albums full of desaturated, poorly-lit snapshots that look very much like these. (I mean, the tech is clever, but the results are inane.) The thing is, Hipstamatic or VintageJS are only clever for those too young to remember when this sort of look was actually the best amateur photography could do. For the rest of us it's like my cheap 110 camera come back from the dead. (Actually, it's probably not dead - if I dug my 35 year old 110 out of the box in the basement, it would probably still work, assuming I could find film for it. But the pictures would still suck compared to my modest Canon digital camera.)
posted by aught at 8:11 AM on August 22, 2011 [2 favorites]


Metafilter: Clever but unnecessary.
posted by phong3d at 8:24 AM on August 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


But the pictures would still suck compared to my modest Canon digital camera.

But, but...it's ironic!
posted by Thorzdad at 8:36 AM on August 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


Metafilter: a charmingly poignant vagina.
posted by kcds at 8:56 AM on August 22, 2011 [5 favorites]


Maybe it would help if my parents didn't have dozens and dozens of old albums full of desaturated, poorly-lit snapshots that look very much like these.

Your parents are the most awesome people ever. My parents have perfectly exposed pictures in crisp focus. Well the did. Now they're in a box on my shelf.
posted by jwhite1979 at 9:29 AM on August 22, 2011


jwhite1979: "Anyone have any advice on how to achieve similar effects with Photoshop?"
Here are some recorded PS actions that will apply similar effects.
posted by msbutah at 9:30 AM on August 22, 2011 [3 favorites]


Thank you. :)
posted by jwhite1979 at 9:36 AM on August 22, 2011


Maybe it'll help if you don't think of it as faux-vintage

Also, try looking at them while you're wearing a fedora.
posted by inigo2 at 10:12 AM on August 22, 2011


I was expecting this to be a JavaScript library for performing these operations. Cool all the same, but not what I expected.
posted by dgran at 10:25 AM on August 22, 2011


I was expecting this to be a JavaScript library for performing these operations. Cool all the same, but not what I expected.

dgran, it is.
posted by suedehead at 10:38 AM on August 22, 2011 [2 favorites]


This will pass. But future generations won't see it as retro, or as ironic, but as authentically the look of our era, the look of the earliest massive wave photos taken with smartphones and shared on social media. Eventually, other things will come along -- I have been running all my smartphone photos through a filter that makes it look distorted, like a computer misread data, as you can see in my profile photo. Will that catch on? I hope not, as I'd sort of like to keep it for myself. But something else will come along and become popular.

These Instagram-style photos will eventually become associated with nostalgia and the counterculture of our era, and the filters will be used to evoke the past -- not the past of our parents, but the past of our children, remember our era, the one we're in right now.
posted by Bunny Ultramod at 10:51 AM on August 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


You know, "retro" doesn't have to mean bad, as in blurry, poorly-exposed, or bad color. Last week, I was down at the beach, and I toted around both my Nikon D50 and a 50's-era Ziess Ikon (a consumer-level viewfinder manual 35 mm) with Velvia slide film in it, and shot a lot of things with both cameras. Overall, the slides from the Ikon are more detailed, more color accurate, and have a wider tonal range.

Until last week, I was within about 30 old slides of being done with my slide scanner FOREVER, and I'm now on the verge of shifting back to film, instead.
posted by Devils Rancher at 11:02 AM on August 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


I fucking hate these retromatic instahipster things and I wish they would all die a horrible fucking death. Come on, this generation isn't too stupid to create anything new. We can do it! Why do we have to use new technology to recreate something we don't even remember firsthand?
posted by desjardins at 12:10 PM on August 22, 2011


The thing is, Hipstamatic or VintageJS are only clever for those too young to remember when this sort of look was actually the best amateur photography could do.

Agreed. One of my Flickr albums was a bunch of old pics, including scanned polaroids and some from a toy camera that I took when I was 10. It didn't take long to amass dozens of comments* from dicks who thought I was trying to be a hipster.

*Comments like this one: I fucking hate these retromatic instahipster things and I wish they would all die a horrible fucking death.
posted by coolguymichael at 12:32 PM on August 22, 2011


Some people just have big aesthetic reactions to things. I never quite know why. Seems like a lot of energy to spend worrying about what sort of filter other people use on their photos.
posted by Bunny Ultramod at 12:42 PM on August 22, 2011 [2 favorites]


Also, try looking at them while you're wearing a fedora trilby, that you think is a fedora.

Close, inigo2.
posted by IAmBroom at 12:57 PM on August 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


For the record I wear a fedora, and I'm a dork not a hipster.
posted by jwhite1979 at 2:30 PM on August 22, 2011


Not to be pedantic, but I'm guessing unless a speculum was involved, you weren't really looking at a poignant vagina.

<DaveBarry>Poignant Vagina would be a great band name</DaveBarry>
posted by maxwelton at 3:04 PM on August 22, 2011


LET'S HAVE A HUG PARTY!
posted by Foci for Analysis at 3:55 PM on August 22, 2011


Finally.
posted by Bunny Ultramod at 12:26 AM on August 23, 2011


« Older Post A Letter Social Activity Club:...  |  Jack Layton has passed away af... Newer »


This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments