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America's evolving alterntive educational system
October 7, 2011 9:16 AM   Subscribe

Celebrating pornographers who go the extra mile when set dressing classroom porn and actually write something on the blackboard. What do they write, and is it correct? (NSFW? No screenshots contain nudity, but Justice Stewart would know it if he saw it)
posted by Blasdelb (40 comments total) 35 users marked this as a favorite

 
One post on that blog? Not exactly killing himself with research, is he?
posted by Ideefixe at 9:18 AM on October 7, 2011


Oops=1 post this year, is what I meant. Still, I'd think there would be more examples.
posted by Ideefixe at 9:19 AM on October 7, 2011


Back up a bit. I have never noticed the blackboards.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 9:20 AM on October 7, 2011 [3 favorites]


Yeah, I was also wondering if the number eight is equal equal equal to or greater than two end parentheses...
posted by obscurator at 9:22 AM on October 7, 2011 [11 favorites]


What's the molecular formula for spooge?
posted by Horselover Phattie at 9:25 AM on October 7, 2011


This is clearly an extremely advanced level mathematical course, focusing on the Peano axioms....

Heh.
He said "Peano."
posted by Floydd at 9:28 AM on October 7, 2011 [7 favorites]


What's the molecular formula for ...

H. It's the most common element in that universe.
posted by zippy at 9:32 AM on October 7, 2011


They marked one guy off for handwriting. Whoever wrote this has been out of college too long.
posted by EtzHadaat at 9:33 AM on October 7, 2011 [1 favorite]


Back up a bit. I have never noticed the blackboards.

You're getting too squinty. You gotta relax the eye muscles. May I suggest a class in tantric methods of prolonging pleasure?
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 9:33 AM on October 7, 2011 [1 favorite]


This is the opposite of Rule 34!
posted by Mister_A at 9:39 AM on October 7, 2011 [7 favorites]


Very droll.
posted by KokuRyu at 9:39 AM on October 7, 2011


Fap checker.
posted by pracowity at 9:40 AM on October 7, 2011 [24 favorites]


Prof. Stefano (#2) got robbed. 7 out of 10? The set dresser drew a map for chrissakes.
posted by pH Indicating Socks at 9:40 AM on October 7, 2011 [7 favorites]


Watch this space for my upcoming blog, "No way is that pizza boy going to make the rest of his deliveries in 30 minutes or less."
posted by PlusDistance at 9:44 AM on October 7, 2011 [12 favorites]


Back up a bit. I have never noticed the blackboards.

That's nothing -- I had never noticed the men and women! I thought these films were rated XXX for their many variables.
posted by chavenet at 9:45 AM on October 7, 2011 [16 favorites]


Gay porn is a lot simpler:

HOMEWORK DUE! (or some variation therof)

or

I WILL NOT DRAW PENISES ON THE CHALKBOARD written repeatedly.

In either case, the statement(s) are usually accompanied by a crude penis drawing, which of course is the whole reason the kid has to stay after school to be seduced by teacher.

...or so I've heard...
posted by PapaLobo at 9:47 AM on October 7, 2011 [1 favorite]


So my claim that I've been "auditing online courses" isn't going to hold up to much scrutiny?
posted by naju at 9:59 AM on October 7, 2011 [2 favorites]


Huh, I think I just finally learned the angle addition formula for tangent.
posted by Wolfdog at 10:03 AM on October 7, 2011 [3 favorites]


Mister_A: "This is the opposite of Rule 34"

1 / 34 = 0.0294117647

Rule 0.03?
posted by I am the Walrus at 10:14 AM on October 7, 2011 [1 favorite]


I know a very good academic who frequently jokes about his/her unrealized desire to be a porn star. I'll forward this blog suggesting s/he look for consulting work.
posted by jeffburdges at 10:15 AM on October 7, 2011


Cool Papa Bell: "You're getting too squinty."

I must be going blind.

OH SHIT MY MOTHER WAS RIGHT!!!
posted by I am the Walrus at 10:15 AM on October 7, 2011 [5 favorites]


This course would culminate with Gödel's second incompleteness theorem which shows that the consitency of the Peano axioms cannot be formalised within Peano arithmetic itself.

Awesome.
posted by Dr. Eigenvariable at 10:19 AM on October 7, 2011 [1 favorite]


Can't look at this at work but gods, what a fantastic premise.
posted by Durn Bronzefist at 10:19 AM on October 7, 2011


For those stuck at work,

-----------------------------

H2N2O2(HO-N=N-OH)
+
H4SIO4(SI(OH)4)
H2O + H2OSO4
H3PO3(HPO(OH2))
H2SO4 => SO4
H2OSO4 = H

-----------------------------

Chemistry – A-level/undergraduate level

This is a frustratingly inconsistent approach to writing chemical formulae. On the one hand the teacher has gone to the trouble of also using structural formulae to improve clarity (eg H2N2O2 could be nitramide, but the addition of HO-N=N-OH makes it clear that we are dealing with hyponitrous acid here), but then writes SI (sulphur iodine) instead of Si (silicon) in the formula for orthosilicic acid. This, combined with not using subscripts for many of the numbers, could lead to a great deal of confusion.

Whilst this lesson appears to be aimed at quite a high level, such elementary errors may affect comprehension.

5/10 - rather sloppy.

posted by Blasdelb at 10:24 AM on October 7, 2011 [1 favorite]


A+!
posted by ob at 10:32 AM on October 7, 2011


Maybe the blogger can hire this guy to help him write some more posts. It seems that combining education and sexual content is right up his alley.
posted by sardonyx at 11:01 AM on October 7, 2011


That was great, too bad there are so few posts.
posted by arcticwoman at 11:05 AM on October 7, 2011


Well, maybe some aspiring filmmakers can help him out.
posted by Durn Bronzefist at 11:07 AM on October 7, 2011


Why am I suddenly interested in renting the movie at #1?
posted by Vindaloo at 11:26 AM on October 7, 2011 [1 favorite]


Needs more NSFW.
posted by Liquidwolf at 11:31 AM on October 7, 2011


Yeah, great idea, but needs more. There's 6 posts total.
posted by mrgrimm at 11:32 AM on October 7, 2011


If you guys keep complaining I'll be forced to watch as much schoolteacher porn as possible in order to copy down the blackboard set dressing. So you better stop! I mean it!
posted by Justinian at 11:55 AM on October 7, 2011


Over here we call them the Peano postulates, which sounds a TON dirtier to me.
posted by skbw at 12:03 PM on October 7, 2011


Blackboards in porn are great ways to promote messages about safe sex and loving relationships. In some relationships, for example, it's considered completely okay to roughly choke your partner and then spit on their chin while grinding against their leg. Such diversity! Humans are incredible!
posted by tumid dahlia at 3:41 PM on October 7, 2011


Speaking of rule 34, the watermark on one these of is from "MatureTeachersOrgies.com", great to know if that's your thing that you don't have to waste on time on sites that just have "all-ages teacher's orgies" or "Mature Teachers having all sorts of sex".

Actually, all of these have watermarks for sites, not movies, this site is probably just cheap advertising, bet if you whois they're all owned by the same person.
posted by 445supermag at 7:26 PM on October 7, 2011


Needs more NSFW.

Yeah, I was surprised that they don't state which movie-and-scene/site-actress-episode each of those grabs came from.
posted by porpoise at 7:40 PM on October 7, 2011 [1 favorite]


A friend of mine who writes graffiti got hired to tag a porn set. So he shows up with all his tools not really knowing what to expect. He's got tons of spray paint and sharpies and those fat homemade deodorant markers. And they're dressing the set and it comes time for him to do his thing so he asks the director, you know, what do you want, I can do a big piece here with a bunch of color in this style, or I can do some Philly tall hand tags, whatever you want. And the director looks at him and says "just write stuff like 'tits' and 'balls' and 'cum'." And that was that. I think he made like $500, just for writing "cock" on the wall like anyone could have done.
posted by nathancaswell at 7:46 PM on October 7, 2011 [4 favorites]


Why am I suddenly interested in renting the movie at #1?

It ain't the math, that's for sure.

(If it is the math - seek professional help)
posted by metaxa at 2:38 PM on October 8, 2011


(If it is the math - seek professional help)

Hey, I know I could use a refresher in trigonometry
posted by Blasdelb at 9:52 AM on October 9, 2011


Based on this blog, it's no surprise to me that most of the 'students' in these films have decided to have sex with their teacher.

1. The teachers are, clearlym largely incompetent.
2. Starved of a competent education and compelling intellectual input, they've worked out a career as a prostitute is the best they're going to get after they're done at this school. Might as well go out with a "bang".
posted by Effigy2000 at 12:00 AM on October 25, 2011


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