This is why you wear a helmet!
October 11, 2011 8:16 AM   Subscribe

Guy has a close encounter with some wildlife during a mountain bike race. (SLYT)
posted by BlooPen (57 comments total) 4 users marked this as a favorite

 
Yeesh. Is the dude all right?

BAM! Hartebeest out of freakin' nowhere!
posted by Faint of Butt at 8:20 AM on October 11, 2011 [1 favorite]


Just another reason why antelopes should be forced to use grade-separated paths.
posted by theodolite at 8:21 AM on October 11, 2011 [7 favorites]


See, if they'd had a bike lane on that path....
posted by msalt at 8:23 AM on October 11, 2011


Holy cow! Shit!
posted by Curious Artificer at 8:25 AM on October 11, 2011


Holy balls, dude. It's bad enough when you hit something like that with your car.
posted by phunniemee at 8:25 AM on October 11, 2011


Holy balls, dude. It's bad enough when you hit something like that with your car.

Something?? Just because he's on a bike doesn't mean he's not a human being! Gah, frikkin internal combusters man.
posted by villanelles at dawn at 8:35 AM on October 11, 2011 [6 favorites]


See, if they'd had a bike buck lane on that path....

FTFY
posted by munchingzombie at 8:36 AM on October 11, 2011 [3 favorites]


This is why you wear a helmet!

Wait, J Walter Weatherman was riding that bike?
posted by kmz at 8:36 AM on October 11, 2011 [3 favorites]


Is the dude all right?

"Van der Spuy suffered a minor concussion and whiplash." (WaPo)
posted by davidjmcgee at 8:37 AM on October 11, 2011


This is why you wear a helmet!
A helmet? I'm as big of a bicycle safety advocate as the next guy, but protection from this type of blindside requires something a bit more than a plastic bowl on your head...perhaps a page from the undersea evolutionary playbook..
posted by obscurator at 8:37 AM on October 11, 2011 [1 favorite]


a minor concussion and whiplash." (WaPo)

I like how you spelled out the sound that makes.
posted by villanelles at dawn at 8:40 AM on October 11, 2011 [35 favorites]


That antelope was totally texting. They never should have adapted the iphone touch to work with hooves.
posted by Stagger Lee at 8:40 AM on October 11, 2011 [10 favorites]


The buck probably only had drum brakes.
posted by arcticseal at 8:41 AM on October 11, 2011 [1 favorite]


This is why you wear a helmet!

In case you unexpectedly end up slamdancing with a hartebeest?
posted by ricochet biscuit at 8:43 AM on October 11, 2011 [2 favorites]


A helmet? I'm as big of a bicycle safety advocate as the next guy, but protection from this type of blindside requires something a bit more than a plastic bowl on your head...perhaps a page from the undersea evolutionary playbook..

If this is the same video I saw earlier (can't view where I'm at now), there is a picture of what's left of the guys helmet at the end. It's clearly a good thing he was wearing it.
posted by Big_B at 8:45 AM on October 11, 2011


Ja, the Red Hartebeest is known to do stuff like this. They call it Africa's traffic warden.
posted by Flashman at 8:45 AM on October 11, 2011 [1 favorite]


"Und so, zee hartebeest will feast into ze night, while zee unfortunate bicyclist simply becomes part of the circle of life und death on ze unforgiving mountain bike circuit."
posted by PlusDistance at 8:47 AM on October 11, 2011 [17 favorites]


I can't help imagining the Teen Girl Squad narrator interjecting "HARTEBEESTED!!" at the critical moment.
posted by Wolfdog at 8:48 AM on October 11, 2011 [10 favorites]


I love how he points. "Hey cameradude, look at that stag thing, do you think we might be able to get closer?"
posted by biffa at 8:49 AM on October 11, 2011


Wow, I really veldt that.
posted by swift at 8:51 AM on October 11, 2011 [4 favorites]


Yeesh. Is the dude all right? --- "Despite taking a kick to the head from the red hartebeest, Evan was up on his feet in seconds. The brunt of the impact seemed to be absorbed by his helmet. He's now the brunt of his mates' jokes, though, and has been nicknamed Buck Norris!"
posted by crunchland at 8:52 AM on October 11, 2011 [3 favorites]


the Red Hartebeest is known to do stuff like this

Why? How is it to their advantage to run around charging anything that moves?
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 8:53 AM on October 11, 2011


Regardless of what the cameraperson said, that was neither a "cow", nor "holy".
posted by HuronBob at 8:53 AM on October 11, 2011


Marlin Perkins: The Hartbeast of South Africa is extremely territorial, and won't hesitate to attack anything its size moving at a high rate of speed. So, we're sending in Jim on a mountainbike to see what happens.
posted by Slap*Happy at 8:54 AM on October 11, 2011 [12 favorites]


The Buck (doesn't) stop here.
posted by Confess, Fletch at 9:00 AM on October 11, 2011 [1 favorite]


I've come so, so, so close to having that happen to me while descending at ~50mph on a road bike. Terrifying.
posted by entropone at 9:06 AM on October 11, 2011


This is why we don't let antelopes play football. Too bad your ass got saaacked.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 9:11 AM on October 11, 2011


the Red Hartebeest is known to do stuff like this

Why? How is it to their advantage to run around charging anything that moves?


Probably mistook him for another buck, no? Its to their advantage to beat down other bucks so that they can mate.
posted by Ironmouth at 9:13 AM on October 11, 2011


Thankfully it does not appear to be running from a beastie with sharp teeth and claws, else Evan might have become a tasty morsel.
posted by Jacob G at 9:14 AM on October 11, 2011


For more wildlife interfering with sporting events, be sure to enjoy this seagull taking a ride on a Formula Vee car during a race.
posted by workerant at 9:20 AM on October 11, 2011 [11 favorites]


Marlin Perkins: "The Red Hartebeest's collision with the bicycle is only one example of the accidents one may encounter in the wild. But with Mutual of Omaha's Hartebeest coverage you can keep your bicycle-riding family safe."
posted by kinnakeet at 9:31 AM on October 11, 2011 [2 favorites]


workerant: you know that's not a seagull, right? I mean, I don't want to be 'that guy' but it's the nose of the car flapping up.
posted by komara at 9:41 AM on October 11, 2011


Could we not turn this into a cyclists vs. ungulates thread?
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 9:42 AM on October 11, 2011 [3 favorites]


Why? How is it to their advantage to run around charging anything that moves?

In Africa a lot of the prey are very aggressive. In fact, the biggest killer of humans in Africa eats grass. I really have no idea why this is.
posted by chemoboy at 9:50 AM on October 11, 2011


Mufasa: Everything you see exists together in a delicate balance. As king, you need to understand that balance and respect all the creatures, from the mountain biker to the leaping hartebeest.
Simba: But dad, don't we eat the hartebeest?
Mufasa: Yes, Simba, but let me explain. When we collide head first into a mountain biker, our bodies become the grass and the hartebeest eat the grass. And so we are all connected in the great cycle of life.
posted by Fizz at 9:51 AM on October 11, 2011


Why? How is it to their advantage to run around charging anything that moves?

I suppose it might be true, but I was just talking out of my ass, and making a rather oblique reference to the Gods Must Be Crazy, where Steyn claims (in a later scene I think) that the rhinoceros is the 'fire warden of the bush'
posted by Flashman at 9:52 AM on October 11, 2011


"Van der Spuy suffered a minor concussion and whiplash."

Whiplash. Yeah, right. Watch that quietly go away as soon as he figures out Antelopes don't carry liability coverage.
posted by Naberius at 9:57 AM on October 11, 2011 [3 favorites]


I mean, I don't want to be 'that guy' but it's the nose of the car flapping up.

It really did look like a rather perturbed seagull, though.
posted by WalterMitty at 9:59 AM on October 11, 2011


Knocks him cold. You can hear him moaning as he comes about.
posted by rotifer at 10:31 AM on October 11, 2011


Local guy to me was not so lucky when a deer hit him during the bike portion of a triathlon. He's still recovering five months later and has permanent brain damage.
posted by idb at 10:33 AM on October 11, 2011


"* dum da dumm dee * But you'll look sweet... upon the seat of a... NO! NOT YOU!!!!"
posted by Mike D at 10:38 AM on October 11, 2011


I call that "Animal Justice".
posted by hal_c_on at 10:39 AM on October 11, 2011


Yep. This example qualifies for http://animalsbeingdicks.com (WARNING: digital doritos)
posted by TangerineGurl at 10:50 AM on October 11, 2011


oh deer.
posted by not_on_display at 10:56 AM on October 11, 2011 [1 favorite]


Typical cyclist. Thinks he owns the bloody footpath.
posted by Decani at 10:57 AM on October 11, 2011


You know what could've prevented this tragedy? Not participating in a sporting event that requires you to traverse the grazing territory of wild hartebeets wearing lycra in attention-grabbing colours.

Really almost anything that would involve cycle shorts and wild roaming hartebeests is Darwin rapping on your moulded carbon-fibre helmet so hard it chafes his knuckles.

Except hartebeest short-track cycling, which would simply be awesome.

I'll stop now.

posted by gompa at 11:03 AM on October 11, 2011 [2 favorites]


You know what's sad? He clearly points at the fucker in the beginning of the video.
posted by phaedon at 11:05 AM on October 11, 2011 [1 favorite]


Wow, 2.5 million hits on a day-old video. That's fast, too.
posted by heyho at 11:12 AM on October 11, 2011


You know what's sad? He clearly points at the fucker in the beginning of the video.
He's the Babe Ruth of cycling.
posted by tmt at 11:32 AM on October 11, 2011 [7 favorites]


I don't know the role of the second cyclist (chase cam rider? another racer?) but I like that he immediately stopped and got off the path to help the fallen rider, instead of riding on, thinking, "Sweet, just moved up a place!" That's class.
posted by xedrik at 12:00 PM on October 11, 2011


To be fair, the cyclist did set his gearshift for the high gear of his soul.

Kind of had it coming to him, I say.
posted by emelenjr at 12:25 PM on October 11, 2011


OK, I've got something a little too thin for a post of it's own, but seems like a good thickener of this particular post. MetaCarageenan if you will:

Joey's OK is a video of Joey Mullan dismounting his cyclocross bike to carry it while jumping over a barrier, but he doesn't quite slow down enough and launches into the air. [via] Joey "got up and just walked away". He's really OK.

Oh, and the (last day of the) race was sponsored by MeFi. Some Pictures by matthowie.
posted by morganw at 12:51 PM on October 11, 2011


If you think that's bad, you want to see what it did to the hipster on the fixie 5 minutes later.
posted by MuffinMan at 1:09 PM on October 11, 2011


D'oh! A deer! A female deer!
posted by vac2003 at 7:37 PM on October 11, 2011 [1 favorite]


Oh dear workerant, I almost asphyxiated laughing at that video. Was it the nonchalance of the bird, or the incomprehending babble of the announcer? We may never know.
posted by Tzarius at 4:33 AM on October 12, 2011


The Hartebeest just takes what it wants.
posted by Lipstick Thespian at 5:53 PM on October 12, 2011 [1 favorite]


hah, He just wanted to play´╗┐ leapfrog!
posted by gmc_manufacturer at 7:00 PM on October 18, 2011


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