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April 9, 2012 7:47 PM

Japanese kids draw Henry Rollins. More at Hello Henry.
posted by KevinSkomsvold (34 comments total)

I think "Japanese kids draw Henry Rollins" is pretty much the most enticing link text possible in this universe. The super hairy chest Henry Rollins wins.
posted by invitapriore at 7:53 PM on April 9, 2012 [10 favorites]

I'd like to know how the teacher described the flag tattoo... maybe "draw four offset rectangles on the left arm..." It seems pretty consistent. As does the chest hair.
posted by Huck500 at 7:55 PM on April 9, 2012 [2 favorites]

It's one of those things I didn't know I needed to see but I'm already wondering how I lived without it.
posted by troublesome at 7:57 PM on April 9, 2012 [4 favorites]

The Einstürzende Neubauten logo seems to have been described as a stick figure, although a couple have the dot in the center of the face.
posted by Huck500 at 7:59 PM on April 9, 2012 [1 favorite]

any translation for the text on the fourth one down?

I love the scowling/smiling feet. like they hunger to kick some ass or something.
posted by One Thousand and One at 8:02 PM on April 9, 2012

I'm trying to imagine how I would explain to the parents of my students why their children are drawing pictures of a tattooed shirtless guy, and I'm coming up short, except in the case of one parent who was actually a tattooed guitarist in a 90s rock band... but the rest would question it, I'm certain.

This is awesome, though.
posted by Huck500 at 8:05 PM on April 9, 2012 [1 favorite]

I'm wondering that too, One Thousand and One. My hope is that it explains the varicose veins all over his body. It's like the standard anime trope can't suffice to explain the unbridled punk rock rage within the unseen depths of Henry's soul, so now his body is trying to reject all of his arteries at once. And swell his head up into a giant Mento.

Poor fella.
posted by DNAshwood at 8:15 PM on April 9, 2012

I've got a stack of about, oh, 50 or 60 drawings of myself, made by japanese kids over the past couple of years or so, from English classes that I teach. The kids ages range from 3 to 12, thereabouts. Had I already scanned and uploaded them onto a page at my website, as I've been meaning to do, I would self-link here, cause I think it'd be on-topic enough. But alas, I haven't done it yet. They're hilarious, though, and I'll try to get it together and do that soon.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 8:28 PM on April 9, 2012

Amazing! Each one is so different from the next but they are all accurate.
posted by MaryDellamorte at 8:33 PM on April 9, 2012 [6 favorites]

OK, flapjax, you must do that. You must.

This is just the best thing ever.
posted by madamjujujive at 8:42 PM on April 9, 2012

This one is odd. It's like Karen O going out as Henry Rollins for Halloween.
posted by mykescipark at 8:49 PM on April 9, 2012 [3 favorites]

I'm so glad that the very important context was provided that these were drawings made by Japanese children, as opposed to generic children. These drawings are so different from what I'd expect an American child to draw, that without that added context, I don't know that I'd have been able to interpret them.
posted by Ivan Fyodorovich at 8:51 PM on April 9, 2012

Ivan, many different cultures have different artistic conventions.
posted by benito.strauss at 8:56 PM on April 9, 2012

As for the text on the fourth one down, Henry is shouting "Mosaaa~!", which I frankly have no idea about but it sounds like some kind of Shouty Anime Noise. Below it, though, is the helpful annotation "it's an Afro!".
posted by wanderingmind at 9:00 PM on April 9, 2012

Fourth picture down:

Hair says "もさー" on it, meaning "puffy" or "fluffy". This is explained by the fact that under that, it says "It's an afro".

Under his right armpit, it says "名前": "Name"

On his leg, it says "骨": "Bone". I wonder if the kid misunderstood the directions, thinking that Rollins has a tattoo of the word "bone" instead of a tattoo of a bone itself, or if the kid was just taking the piss.
posted by Bugbread at 9:04 PM on April 9, 2012 [4 favorites]

I want to read tales of nervous, sparkly, mop-topped Rollins and his bull friend.
posted by jason_steakums at 9:08 PM on April 9, 2012 [5 favorites]

I...just. There are no words.

I was really depressed about the state of the world and how we are all inevitably going to hell in a handbasket and there's nothing that any of us can do to stave off the inevitability of the world collapsing in on itself...

...but then I saw this link, and suddenly I feel like I can accomplish anything.

I don't know how to describe it. This just feels right.
posted by HostBryan at 9:10 PM on April 9, 2012 [4 favorites]

Whoa! Bugbread's back!
posted by flapjax at midnite at 9:10 PM on April 9, 2012 [2 favorites]

Mod note: A couple of comments removed; weird fighty derail about the kids being Japanese is weird. Let's not do that any more.
posted by taz (staff) at 10:03 PM on April 9, 2012

I love how in some of drawings, his pecs are drawn like some sort of intricate, metal plating. I'd say if I had no idea who they were drawing, 95% of the time I could guess "Henry Rollins."
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 11:08 PM on April 9, 2012 [1 favorite]

This very much meets with my approval.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 11:08 PM on April 9, 2012 [1 favorite]

Why is Rollins not playing Hulk? Clearly he'd be best at it.
posted by Artw at 2:17 AM on April 10, 2012

I'm trying to imagine how I would explain to the parents of my students why their children are drawing pictures of a tattooed shirtless guy

See, most of us ALTs are so passionately and subconsciously loathing of our jobs/companies/lives etc that we flail about in existential horror for an excuse to find a new job.
Some of us? Yes, some of us accept "getting fired" as a valid entry in that pool.

On another note, I know no less than THREE separate ALTs in the greater Tokyo metropolitan area that would absolutely have (overly gleefully) done something exactly like this. I'm one of them.
posted by GoingToShopping at 3:48 AM on April 10, 2012

This is 100x better than anything I ever put on a lesson plan. To the students, parents and staff of Yamabe Koko and Tsuge Chu-gakko, I offer my sincerest apologies.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 4:29 AM on April 10, 2012

This fills a previously unknown need.
posted by arcticseal at 4:49 AM on April 10, 2012 [2 favorites]

Also, there seriously needs to be a shonen manga about mo-e Henry Rollins. Like, he's just some skinny sensitive kid (but who, for some reason, still has a bunch of tattoos), whose only friend is his pet ox. Then one day, while the Ramones are battling Up With People! in the skies over his school, he gets hit by a stray punk rock energy beam and is transformed into THE HANK (but, like, only when he eats super spicy stamina ramen or something).

Actually, why this isn't already a plot line from Chromartie High School is beyond me.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 5:13 AM on April 10, 2012 [5 favorites]

I want to read tales of nervous, sparkly, mop-topped Rollins and his bull friend.

That drawing is a spot-on interpretation of Side 2 of Damaged.
posted by Beardman at 6:50 AM on April 10, 2012

IMHO, the super-hairy-chest one is also the only one that really got the neck right. That was the first thing I looked for, because nothing visually defines Henry Rollins more to me than that super-thick neck.
posted by dlugoczaj at 7:19 AM on April 10, 2012

Anime Rollins is the Best
posted by Potomac Avenue at 7:21 AM on April 10, 2012

I know no less than THREE separate ALTs in the greater Tokyo metropolitan area

I'm guessing this does not mean Andre Leon Talley, but I want it to.
posted by psoas at 8:19 AM on April 10, 2012

Actually, why this isn't already a plot line from Chromartie High School is beyond me.

Putting Henry Rollins in the same anime as Freddy and the gorilla would be TOO. EPIC.
posted by owtytrof at 9:41 AM on April 10, 2012

can anyone answer how they know who henry rollins is?
posted by cupcake1337 at 1:34 PM on April 10, 2012

Cupcake1337,

I don't believe they do. My guess (and it's a guess) is that it's an exercise in following directions and understanding description. Something like this:

"Ok, class, I want you to draw the person I describe. This man is a strong man, with a thick neck. He has a hairy chest. On his leg, he has a tattoo of a bone..." etc.
posted by Bugbread at 2:13 PM on April 10, 2012

Hehn-ri Rō-reen-zu.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 4:33 PM on April 10, 2012