The K-E Diet
April 22, 2012 3:39 PM   Subscribe

In an effort to lose tons of weight before their weddings, some brides are turning to the K-E diet.
posted by reenum (56 comments total) 3 users marked this as a favorite

 
I get the very low calorie ketosis part, but what's so great about the tube? Why would getting fed through a tube beat eating a similar macronutrient ratio of foods through the mouth?
posted by mccarty.tim at 3:43 PM on April 22, 2012 [5 favorites]


Isn't this the "rest in Switzerland" weight loss thing used by the girls in The Valley Of The Dolls? I mean then they knocked you out for a week at least.
posted by The Whelk at 3:45 PM on April 22, 2012 [1 favorite]


lol. Why can't they just eat 800 calories of fruit and vegetables per day like a normal crash dieter? Do these women really feel like spending $1500 to be on a feeding tube validates their dieting?
posted by 200burritos at 3:46 PM on April 22, 2012 [4 favorites]


Metafilter: The novelty is, they shove a tube in your nose.
posted by ShutterBun at 3:47 PM on April 22, 2012 [13 favorites]


That's why being pregnant when you get married is so awesome.
posted by padraigin at 3:50 PM on April 22, 2012 [26 favorites]


I can see the feeding tube look becoming a popular form of body mod.
posted by Obscure Reference at 3:55 PM on April 22, 2012 [1 favorite]


I'm going to start marketing a K-T event diet -- it'll knock those unwanted pounds right off.
posted by Zed at 3:56 PM on April 22, 2012 [16 favorites]


That's some predatory marketing.
posted by b1tr0t at 3:56 PM on April 22, 2012


In a disturbing new trend journalists are writing stories about self invented disturbing new trends to get page views. Is this the beginning of a terrible new fad? Obligatory supportive quote. Counter example. Conclusion: OMGWTF BBQ like me on Facebook and follow my tweets for updates in this developing story.
posted by humanfont at 3:56 PM on April 22, 2012 [34 favorites]


humanfront, you forgot this one that I see all the time in terrible articles:

"What do you think? Let us know in the comments!"
posted by Mikey-San at 3:58 PM on April 22, 2012 [3 favorites]


Isn't this the "rest in Switzerland" weight loss thing used by the girls in The Valley Of The Dolls? I mean then they knocked you out for a week at least.

I don't know about Valley of the Dolls, but that sounds like what killed Mario Lanza.
posted by Halloween Jack at 4:00 PM on April 22, 2012 [2 favorites]


I Lost 32 Pounds In 15 Days And Died!
posted by Ian A.T. at 4:01 PM on April 22, 2012 [8 favorites]


Here in California folks have been spending money and losing weight by sticking things up their noses since the '70s.
posted by Blue Meanie at 4:02 PM on April 22, 2012 [35 favorites]


I can see the feeding tube look becoming a popular form of body mod.

Will we all wear our stillsuits as people born to the Fremen?
posted by winna at 4:02 PM on April 22, 2012 [2 favorites]


Zed: "I'm going to start marketing a K-T event diet -- it'll knock those unwanted pounds right off."

Dammit, you beat me to that joke.

"It's the diet that killed the dinosaurs!"
posted by notsnot at 4:06 PM on April 22, 2012


Up ya nose widdah rubbah hose!
posted by flapjax at midnite at 4:09 PM on April 22, 2012 [7 favorites]


I know I like to be reminded of cancer patients leading up to my Speical Day.
posted by The Whelk at 4:10 PM on April 22, 2012 [3 favorites]


Define "some" and i'll consider whether you understand the definition of "trend."
posted by odinsdream at 4:11 PM on April 22, 2012 [2 favorites]


I did a modified form of the K-E diet where instead of feeding through a nasal tube, you hook up the "purse" of liquid food directly to your colostomy bag, bypassing the body altogether. What convenience!
posted by telegraph at 4:14 PM on April 22, 2012 [1 favorite]


That's obviously pretty stupid. I guess the one benefit is that you don't taste any of the food, thus won't be tempted to eat more. But yeah. Moronic.
posted by delmoi at 4:19 PM on April 22, 2012


Oh look--a fake trend story written by, not Jennifer 8, but rather Linda Lee.
posted by Ideefixe at 4:19 PM on April 22, 2012 [2 favorites]


Up ya nose widdah rubbah hose!

It never occurred to me as a little kid that I was threatening my friends with "enhanced interrogation" whenever I said this.
posted by Mikey-San at 4:27 PM on April 22, 2012


Oh look--a fake trend story

No kidding. One doctor, a handful of brides who didn't even go all the way through with it !=! trend.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 4:29 PM on April 22, 2012 [1 favorite]


What, a ketamine / extacy diet? That might work..
posted by rainy at 4:34 PM on April 22, 2012 [6 favorites]


Why would getting fed through a tube beat eating a similar macronutrient ratio of foods through the mouth?

I think it's part psychological. If you're just going on a diet, well, you can go off the diet at any moment. Now you have a tube going down your throat. You can't easily remove it. Want to try to swallow food with that in place? You probably could, but it'll suck. And shazam, your diet is getting enforced.

Moreover, you have to carry the bag with you everywhere you go. Another psychological marker that things are not normal for you.

Also, I think the slow drip actually curbs hunger, as you're always getting a tiny bit of nutrition.

Finally, THIS IS HOLY FUCK BATSHIT INSANITY. "Dude, your fiance just paid to put a tube down her throat. You sure you want to go through with this? It's not too late to back out..."
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 4:36 PM on April 22, 2012 [3 favorites]


Vegetables are yummy. Good mushrooms taste better than many meats, even average mushrooms obliterate chicken. Calories? What calories?

Jamón serrano with steamed asparagus is incredibly simple and tasty, although obviously the jamón serrano has calories, you simply won't miss bread or whatever when eating yummy asparagus.

Salad dressing made from oil, vinegar, mustard, and optionally horseradish can be as non-caloric as you like by controlling the oil content. Pomegranate or raw ginger can make salads spectacular.

Anyone got any tips for frequently opening pomegranates without staining your fingers though?
posted by jeffburdges at 4:38 PM on April 22, 2012 [2 favorites]


Huh. Seems counter-intuitive as there are actual studies that prove people feel hungrier if they don't get to chew their food, even if given exactly the same amount of calories. So what this does is effectively the same as a diet, but you feel hungrier. What fun that must be.

Besides, there is nothing like attending your own wedding while your body is trying to relearn how to process/digest solids.

Whatever makes you happy, I guess.
posted by slimepuppy at 4:41 PM on April 22, 2012


Why can't they just eat 800 calories of fruit and vegetables per day like a normal crash dieter?

'Cause you'd be super hungry all the time, and way more susceptible to failure? The doctor in the last piece says the tube-feeding is effective at making the dieter's appetite go away.
posted by stoneandstar at 4:41 PM on April 22, 2012 [2 favorites]


Fine, fake trend. What is not fake, but I guess still not exactly a trend, since it's been around for a long time, is the practice of going on crash diets in order to lose weight before the big day. Who hasn't known someone who has done it? I can personally think of several women who did this. Inevitably, every single one of them regained the weight after the wedding, and then some. Moreover, in at least a couple of cases, the diet timing went horribly wrong. The women were losing a lot of weight - and a lot of it water - got fitted for the supertight corset wedding dress, and by the time the wedding rolled around, they've tragically gained back all or most of it, and now could not fit in the too small dress. And so on various dramas around the whole wedding drama.
posted by VikingSword at 4:43 PM on April 22, 2012 [1 favorite]


In March, Jessica Schnaider, 41, of Surfside, Fla., used it to lose 10 pounds so she could fit into the dress she hopes to wear at her June wedding.

All this drastic stuff for 10 pounds, really? I thought losing 10 pounds was relatively doable (I probably lose something like 7 in water weight alone the first week I start a diet/exercise routine), and would expect this to be about losing 25 or more...
posted by naju at 5:07 PM on April 22, 2012 [1 favorite]


Why would getting fed through a tube beat eating a similar macronutrient ratio of foods through the mouth?

If I had to guess, it's a matter of self-control...and lack thereof. The tube is probably one hell of a barrier to scarfing-down a pan of brownies.
posted by Thorzdad at 5:07 PM on April 22, 2012 [2 favorites]


Why can't they just eat 800 calories of fruit and vegetables per day like a normal crash dieter?

This is a more extreme, invasive, and expensive diet that uses the same principles as the Shangri La diet. According to the thinking behind SLD, taste-calorie pairings create conditioned associations that increase hunger. So, if your reptilian brain learns that vanilla means lots of calories, tasting vanilla makes you want to eat more. Find a way to get rid of tastes and hunger dissipates. (For a while anyway, in my experience).
posted by O Blitiri at 5:08 PM on April 22, 2012 [1 favorite]


Anyone got any tips for frequently opening pomegranates without staining your fingers though?

Do it under water? Or so my roommate instructed me to open the pomegranate that time they were on sale. Just use warm water else your hands will get really cold.
posted by hoyland at 5:08 PM on April 22, 2012


Anyone got any tips for frequently opening pomegranates without staining your fingers though?

Throwing them on the ground worked for me. When I was 6.
posted by DU at 5:14 PM on April 22, 2012 [3 favorites]


That's why being pregnant when you get married is so awesome.

"I never saw my father in a suit before, except for on the day he got married."--Groucho Marx

What's the definition of a trend, anyway? I've seen this news story on several outlets, so maybe it is a trend?
posted by Melismata at 5:46 PM on April 22, 2012


Anyone got any tips for frequently opening pomegranates without staining your fingers though?

I trim the ends off of them and let them sit in a bowl of ice water for a few minutes. Then I peel them under running water.
posted by duvatney at 5:47 PM on April 22, 2012 [1 favorite]


This is a more extreme, invasive, and expensive diet that uses the same principles as the Shangri La diet. According to the thinking behind SLD, taste-calorie pairings create conditioned associations that increase hunger. So, if your reptilian brain learns that vanilla means lots of calories, tasting vanilla makes you want to eat more. Find a way to get rid of tastes and hunger dissipates. (For a while anyway, in my experience).
posted by O Blitiri at 5:08 PM on April 22 [1 favorite +] [!]




Ooooh. Thanks for this.
posted by 200burritos at 5:51 PM on April 22, 2012


Seems there's a historical precedent
posted by mattoxic at 6:01 PM on April 22, 2012 [2 favorites]


My god, what a bunch of idiots. Foolish, foolish people.
posted by ThatCanadianGirl at 6:04 PM on April 22, 2012


This is great for those people who want to walk around like minor characters in David Lynch films.
posted by tumid dahlia at 6:11 PM on April 22, 2012 [1 favorite]


I saw this and thought "Oh, bullshit. Nobody is really doing this."

I am happy to see many Mefites thought the same thing.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 6:14 PM on April 22, 2012 [1 favorite]


I place nasogastric tubes at work all the time and let me tell you that it is a very unpleasant experience for the patient. Unless you are at risk for aspirating your food, I highly recommend not getting one.
posted by brevator at 6:24 PM on April 22, 2012 [1 favorite]


This seems like a good place to post Ben Greenfield's recent interview with Dr. Peter Attia on ketogenic diets. It's interesting that ketone-based diets are being used to treat various mental degenerative diseases such as Alzheimers, and are also apparently being used in Japan to reduce inflammation/paralysis in patients with spinal/nervous system damage.

The interview itself is more on performance, but I think it turns a few ideas like carb loading and glycogen levels on their heads.
posted by Telf at 6:33 PM on April 22, 2012 [2 favorites]


This particular absurdity may be a fake trend, but I've been teaching a course on sociology of the body for some years, and I have heard many more disturbing things from my female-identified students about their preparation-for-wedding regimes. Asking for a long engagement in order to have the necessary "work" (i.e. plastic surgery) done, for example--one particular student was in year 2 of a 3 year engagement, and on number 4 of 7 planned procedures. The student in question already had a child with her fiance, and both of the adults were working full time in addition to going to school and parenting, to pay for the bride-to-be's plastic surgery bills. (She was, by conventional standards, already very attractive.) My student was just adamant that this "work" was necessary for her wedding photos, and portrayed her fiance as enthusiastic about her new breasts and resigned to the expenses. All I can conclude is that social pressures produce odd priorities in people.
posted by DrMew at 6:42 PM on April 22, 2012


I'm currently undergoing a similar diet. It's called "getting sick and having your appetite drop dramatically". I've lost five pounds in one week already!
posted by egypturnash at 7:38 PM on April 22, 2012


That yahoo op ed was horrid. The guy probably thought he was being all supportive and affirming but it comes off as so condescending.

The desire to go on any sort of extreme diet in the weeks before one's wedding signifies some issues and insecurities that should be addressed. A bride must ask herself why she feels compelled to go to such great lengths to achieve a slimmer look.

Really? You can't think of any reasons a woman might feel pressure to be thin except mental issues on her part? It's really all her fault and if she were a better person this wouldn't be an issue? Ugh.
posted by mosessis at 8:01 PM on April 22, 2012 [2 favorites]


notsnot: ""It's the diet that killed the dinosaurs!""

"You'll go from T. Rex to chicken in just 65 million years Ten Days!"
posted by stet at 8:15 PM on April 22, 2012


.
posted by 4ster at 8:16 PM on April 22, 2012


Another rule-34 variant: If you can think of a profoundly stupid and useless thing, the Wedding Industrial Complex will find a way to market it to brides.
posted by gingerest at 9:45 PM on April 22, 2012 [2 favorites]


Which brings up an interesting point: is there porn of this?
posted by flabdablet at 10:09 PM on April 22, 2012


Which brings up an interesting point: is there porn of this?

Not that I can find with a short search for research purposes only. But that hasn't stopped unscrupulous websites from using it as search bait. For some reason.

FWIW, I've had an NG tube or two in my time, and even if I would lose 50 pounds overnight and got whiter teeth, I don't think I'd get another one voluntarily. Going in is just a totally miserable experience, novel only in how specifically unpleasant it is, and getting it pulled is like having a four foot booger removed, except that the last two feet are coated in stomach acid and bile.
posted by Homeboy Trouble at 11:07 PM on April 22, 2012 [3 favorites]


So when do you think we'll see the obvious follow-up story: Bridezillas forcing their bridesmaids to do this as well?
posted by SisterHavana at 12:14 AM on April 23, 2012 [2 favorites]


The Whelk: No, this was the "sleep cure" which was apparently a real thing, though since it was not closely regulated there isn't much information on how widespread the use was. Essentially the idea was that weight-loss patients would be set up with an IV of medication that produces a similar effect to the "conscious sedation" now used in procedures like the colonostomy. Thus the patient would be semi-conscious, responsive to direction from the medical personnel, but would have complete amnesia of the week or so of the process. During the "cure.," the patient would be fed a low-calorie diet (I suppose liquids) and the limbs exercised. The subjective impression (thanks to the amnesia effect) would be that the patient would fall asleep and almost immediately wake up, 10 pounds lighter.

In VOTD, the character of Jennifer takes the sleep cure when she is transitioning from her career of soft-core "art film" star to Hollywood actress. Asleep for eight days, she drops from 118 pounds to 106 with no ill effects (this is fiction, after all.) And then--since she is 37 years old--she checks into another clinic for a facelift.

Jacqueline Susann, though mediocre at best as an author, did seem to have a photographic memory for showbiz gossip, so the "sleep cure" is at least something people believed existed, not a complete invention.
posted by La Cieca at 12:57 AM on April 23, 2012


Colonoscopy, obviously. A good thing I don't run a Swiss clinic!
posted by La Cieca at 12:58 AM on April 23, 2012


Since Lanza's come up in the comments, I might as well mention Laird Cregar, a very fine character actor from the '30s and '40s, who also died as a direct result of crash dieting. He was typically cast as the villain or a talented nutcase, and played those roles to the hilt, but apparently wanted a career as a romantic leading man. His looks, talent, and voice could well have brought him that type of role, but he died after a quickie 100-lb weight loss before that could happen. According to Wikipedia, he was prescribed amphetamines during the crash diet.

(I'll take any excuse to bring Laird Cregar into a conversation. Also worth noting is that his film "Hangover Square" features an early score by Bernard Herrmann.)
posted by Currer Belfry at 9:18 AM on April 23, 2012 [1 favorite]


I might as well mention Laird Cregar, a very fine character actor from the '30s and '40s, who also died as a direct result of crash dieting.

It was pretty disconcerting to click on the link in that sentence only to be confronted by a giant picture of a LEGO person, in a hilarious way. I was not aware of the importance of LEGO actors in early cinema!
posted by winna at 7:18 PM on April 24, 2012


« Older Making a crystal cMoy freeform headphone amp: 1 2 ...  |  Last month, select portions of... Newer »


This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments