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Gabby Douglas is the Prez.
October 27, 2012 10:00 AM   Subscribe

Pick your celebrity president - "We have gathered runners and riders from across the celebrity spectrum - from sports stars to celebrity chefs - for a more glittering election in 2012. Answer the questions and find out who you would likely vote for in a showbiz showdown for the keys to the White House." via BBC.

I, for one, welcome our new gymnastic overladies; I would like to be the first to congratulate Gabby on this outstanding achievement, and wish her all the best for her terms as President of the United States.
posted by marienbad (40 comments total) 2 users marked this as a favorite

 
Oprah. I feel like I'm in a Bloom County joke somehow.
posted by dismas at 10:05 AM on October 27, 2012 [4 favorites]


Oprah. Metafilter: I feel like I'm in a Bloom County joke somehow.
posted by Fizz at 10:15 AM on October 27, 2012 [1 favorite]


Alice Cooper. A golfing machine.
posted by clavdivs at 10:21 AM on October 27, 2012


I got... Adam Savage? I feel like I'm in a MetaFilter joke somehow.
posted by oulipian at 10:21 AM on October 27, 2012 [3 favorites]


Scarlett Johansson first and then my second choice (running mate?) was Beyonce. Then I realized that neither of them are old enough to be president and spent 20 seconds trying to come up with a witty "Destiny's Child" joke and failed.
posted by antonymous at 10:27 AM on October 27, 2012


Charles Francis Coghlan - Wha?

Oh, sorry, steampunk version.
posted by Smedleyman at 10:28 AM on October 27, 2012


The first question appears to be "male or female". Why?
posted by Hicksu at 10:30 AM on October 27, 2012 [12 favorites]


Yeah, Hicksu, I wanted my "I don't give a shit!" option.

I was hoping for a thing that narrowed down celebrity candidates based on statements they've made on their views, etc. Instead, it was based on the same superficial shit that... well, that we always use when classifying celebrities.
posted by Golfhaus at 10:34 AM on October 27, 2012 [3 favorites]


Gwyneth Paltrow?! Seriously, BBC? You debase yourself with this.

The article on the same website, What sitcoms say about American voters is ... interesting (though caution as the author writes a politically erratic column in the Telegraph).
posted by Wordshore at 10:36 AM on October 27, 2012


John Grisham/Paula Deen 2012!
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 10:37 AM on October 27, 2012 [1 favorite]


I am actually legitimately outraged over the stupid assumption that Beyonce is somehow a "couch potato". How fucking dare you, BBC.
posted by elizardbits at 10:41 AM on October 27, 2012 [2 favorites]


I got Paula Deen, a reasonable approximation of someone actually on my ballot. VOTE ROSEANNE BARR!
posted by carsonb at 10:42 AM on October 27, 2012 [1 favorite]


I AM COMPOSING A STRONGLY-WORDED EMAIL
posted by elizardbits at 10:42 AM on October 27, 2012


Couldn't be any worse.
posted by blue_beetle at 10:43 AM on October 27, 2012


Wow, Hicksu and Golfhaus, it is a bit of silly election cycle fun from the bbc, no beanplating is really required. It has to remove candidates somehow, and I think they were just trying to keep it simple and fun, rather than detailed and involved. It is on the beeb and hence, for the UK, so no point making it too sophisticated or us plebs will never be able to understand it.
posted by marienbad at 10:53 AM on October 27, 2012


Well, I'm apparently voting for Gwyneth and Jay-Z.
posted by capricorn at 10:56 AM on October 27, 2012 [2 favorites]


I am actually legitimately outraged over the stupid assumption that Beyonce is somehow a "couch potato". How fucking dare you, BBC.

Yeah, Matt Damon is apparently not sporty, either. I'm pretty sure he's quite athletic compared to me.
posted by kittens for breakfast at 11:12 AM on October 27, 2012 [2 favorites]


Now I'm left wondering whether Lady Gaga or Mitt Romney would be worse on foreign policy.

I am forced to admit that a Mitt Romney presidency might be preferable to a Lady Gaga presidency, but the latter would be extremely entertaining. (And government spending on meat dresses and unlikely shoes might help out the economic recovery...)
posted by Jeanne at 11:12 AM on October 27, 2012 [1 favorite]


William S Burroughs
posted by Golden Eternity at 11:16 AM on October 27, 2012


Jeanne: "I am forced to admit that a Mitt Romney presidency might be preferable to a Lady Gaga presidency"

From this side of the missiles, sure.
posted by Apropos of Something at 11:22 AM on October 27, 2012


I'm apparently running an Oprah Winfrey / John Grisham ticket.

I'm pretty sure John's gonna spend the whole campaign complaining that Oprah never picked any of his books for her bookclub.
posted by jacquilynne at 11:28 AM on October 27, 2012 [1 favorite]


Bill Pullman should be on this list.
posted by littlesq at 11:29 AM on October 27, 2012


Ellen/Chris Rock 2016!

I... could get behind that.
posted by cmoj at 11:34 AM on October 27, 2012 [4 favorites]


Wow, Hicksu and Golfhaus, it is a bit of silly election cycle fun from the bbc, no beanplating is really required. It has to remove candidates somehow, and I think they were just trying to keep it simple and fun, rather than detailed and involved.

If I want silly and simple, I'll turn to American media. I expect certain things when I see a bbc.co.uk URL.
posted by Golfhaus at 11:41 AM on October 27, 2012


no beanplating is really required [...] just trying to keep it simple and fun

Even in the pursuit of simple and fun, sex didn't have to be a determining factor. It seems odd to me. Who opens up discussion about the qualities that they want in a president with, "We'll, I suppose, for starters, I'd like them to be male..."
posted by Hicksu at 11:51 AM on October 27, 2012 [4 favorites]


Ellen Degeneres and Alec Baldwin.

But this is kinda dumb.
posted by sweetkid at 12:05 PM on October 27, 2012


GOOGLE ELLEN DEGENERES
posted by not_on_display at 12:17 PM on October 27, 2012 [6 favorites]


Apparently Matt Damon is not good-looking.
posted by Huck500 at 12:55 PM on October 27, 2012


I would, in the heartbeat of a goddamn New York minute, vote for a Stewart/Fey* ticket, because I think they'd actually do a goddamn good job.

*Or Fey/Stewart, your choice.
posted by furnace.heart at 1:09 PM on October 27, 2012


GOOGLE ELLEN DEGENERES
The weird thing about this being made by the BBC, is that I'm sure not all of these folks are well-known in the UK. I mean, I got Ellen Degeneres for President, and I'm roughly aware that she's a comic actor. But Payton Manning? Gabby Douglas? Freddie Prinze? Vince Vaughn? Loretta Lynn? Fair enough, the BBC has a worldwide readership, but there are some obscure folk on this list.
posted by Jehan at 1:57 PM on October 27, 2012


I think Martin Sheen would win big in this country.
He certainly looks 'presidential'.
posted by MtDewd at 1:57 PM on October 27, 2012


John Grisham? Hell no!
posted by Splunge at 2:26 PM on October 27, 2012


The weird thing about this being made by the BBC, is that I'm sure not all of these folks are well-known in the UK.

The BBC News website is the most visited online news website and is partly designed for an international audience (in this case though, it's probably aiming this "quiz"(or whatever) thing at a US audience).
This is why, incidentally, many English language news stories on the BBC site often have a concise or "thin" (I don't mean this negatively) feel - because they're made to be easy to read for people with English as a second language. Outside of the UK, the BBC news website is allowed to make money from advertising, so there's that incentive too
posted by Bwithh at 2:38 PM on October 27, 2012


My ticket is Halle Berry for "Works hard" Prez, ScarJo for "Party time" Veep. Sounds pretty good to me.
posted by Bwithh at 2:40 PM on October 27, 2012


I voted a straight frumpy lefty ticket and wound up with Oprah. And somehow I don't remember pulling the lever for a new car but nevertheless, here it is.
posted by Lieber Frau at 3:02 PM on October 27, 2012 [1 favorite]


Eva Longoria/John Grisham 2012. My ticket guarantees no more books by Grisham and therefore secures the fickle group of snub readers.
posted by ersatz at 3:12 PM on October 27, 2012



My ticket is Halle Berry for "Works hard" Prez, ScarJo for "Party time" Veep. Sounds pretty good to me.
posted by Bwithh at 2:40 PM on October 27 [+] [!]


If they ever make a dramatized and fun-enhanced biopic of the Obama-Biden relationship, these two would actually be perfect choices for the respective roles.
posted by Bwithh at 3:12 PM on October 27, 2012 [1 favorite]


Oprah. I like the idea!
posted by bearwife at 3:59 PM on October 27, 2012


not_on_display: "GOOGLE ELLEN DEGENERES"

Swag.
posted by Apropos of Something at 5:49 PM on October 27, 2012


Gabby Douglas/Matt Damon. How appropriate for something that arbitrary.
posted by arcticseal at 6:10 PM on October 27, 2012


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