BOBBY: When I turn 18, I'm going to do whatever I want for the Lord. Tattoos, piercings, you name it.
HANK: Well, I'll take that chance. Come here, there's something I want you to see. (Hank takes down a box from the shelf and opens it up) Remember this?
BOBBY: My beanbag buddy? Oh, man, I can't believe I collected those things. They're so lame.
HANK: You didn't think so five years ago. And how about your virtual pet? You used to carry this thing everywhere. Then you got tired of it, forgot to feed it, and it died.
BOBBY (looks at a photo of himself in a Ninja Turtles costume): I look like such a dork.
HANK: I know how you feel. I never thought that "Members Only" jacket would go out of style, but it did. I know you think stuff you're doing now is cool, but in a few years you're going to think it's lame. And I don't want the Lord to end up in this box.
No, Mom, I'm fat. But -- big deal. I don't feel bad about it. You never made me feel bad about it, and just because there are some people in the world who want me to feel bad about it, doesn't mean I have to. So Bobby's fat. Eh. He's also funny, nice, he's got a lot of friends, a girlfriend, and if you don't mind, I think I'll go outside and squirt her with water. [starts to leave, pauses] What are you gonna do?
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