BECAUSE HE GODDAMN WELL COULD, THAT'S WHY

January 17, 2013 3:45 PM

'News of impending fatherhood affects men in different ways. Some guys pump their fists. Others light cigars. A few flee. When 33-year-old Colin Furze learned that his girlfriend was pregnant, he channeled his paternal excitement into building the world’s fastest baby stroller.' The twin-exhaust, 10-horsepower, gasoline-fueled pram has four gears. And cupholders. And it can accelerate to 50mph in less than 30 seconds.

On October 14, 2012, he broke the Guinness World Record for fastest pram with a top speed of 53.46mph. Previous record holder was just under 30mph. There's also a "Behind the Scenes" video.

posted by zarq (28 comments total)

So in other words he panicked.
posted by mazola at 3:52 PM on January 17 [22 favorites]

On seeing his design, my main concern is that tricycles with the single wheel at the front are significantly less stable than those with a trailing single wheel. This is, after all, intended to carry his child. Otherwise, rock on, crazy father-to-be.
posted by mosk at 3:55 PM on January 17

If I were the wife I'd be pissed that he's spending money on that shit and not on the kid.
posted by desjardins at 3:55 PM on January 17 [5 favorites]

I have a great idea for baby shakesperian 's first birthday gift now.
posted by The Whelk at 3:56 PM on January 17 [4 favorites]

Most people, when they're going to have a kid and they want to go zero to 50 mph in thirty seconds, just buy a minivan.
posted by box at 3:58 PM on January 17 [14 favorites]

If I were the wife I'd be pissed that he's spending money on that shit and not on the kid.

At this stage they're always pissed, man. My wife is a loving, reasonable, sensible, intelligent woman and yet, our youngest is 4 months old and I fear my wife will cut me if I don't put on an undershirt below her sleeper.

This man is suffering from that heady mix of denial, wired enthusiasm and panicked sense that the free time available to build such a thing will vanish like a puddle on a Las Vegas sidewalk. He'd be right.

Just leave him be. He's one of us now.
posted by jimmythefish at 4:05 PM on January 17 [8 favorites]

There's a really interesting point in the Atlantic article linked above:

By simply creating products that appeal more explicitly to men -- or that don't explicitly exclude them -- companies could help foster more balanced parenting dynamics. The Megapram itself is, of course (and alas), mostly a joke. But it sports a nice little insight: Parenting can be manly. Parenting can be adventurous. Parenting can have four gears and a motorbike engine and the ability to speed down the road at 50 mph.

Whether you agree or not, you gotta admit - this guy looks REALLY DAMN HAPPY, and that's always a good thing.

I also want to introduce this guy to the guy who made this video because I think the two of them would REALLY dig each other.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 4:06 PM on January 17 [1 favorite]

I can't see pictures of the thing, but does it have fluffy dice for the kid to play with? Because it really should.
posted by UbuRoivas at 4:07 PM on January 17 [3 favorites]

EmpressCallipygos: My brother got divorced and quite drinking over the past couple of years, and found solace and new passion in an activity generally considered pretty feminine by modern America. As such, he is now working on creating a line of accessories and equipment for that activity that will be squarely aimed at men in order to get them over the preconceptions he held before getting into it. I think it's a good idea all around.
posted by Navelgazer at 4:10 PM on January 17

Best midlife crisis ever.
posted by Kid Charlemagne at 4:33 PM on January 17

Looking at his other videos, he seems more of the Photonic Induction school of garden shed madman than anything else.
posted by lucidium at 4:48 PM on January 17 [2 favorites]

Uh-huh, good luck one-handing that into a car trunk, with a baby in the other hand and a diaper bag tucked under your chin...
posted by madajb at 4:54 PM on January 17 [1 favorite]

The idea of raising a baby in a women's commune seems far more appealing than raising it with someone who chose to build a stroller that can go 50 mph in less than 30 seconds. Good God. I mean really?
posted by discopolo at 4:54 PM on January 17 [1 favorite]

Mosk, he's not putting the kid in it. Said it wasn't safe or stable enough.
posted by zarq at 4:57 PM on January 17

He’s quick to note that he has no intention of putting Jake in the speeding carriage.

Is it really a stroller if it's not designed to carry an infant, or is it merely a vaguely stroller-shaped object?
posted by Scientist at 4:58 PM on January 17

Whether you agree or not, you gotta admit - this guy looks REALLY DAMN HAPPY, and that's always a good thing.

Near as I could tell when I was baby-shopping, strollers were about the only thing _meant_ to appeal to men.
The verbiage was basically just car advertising re-purposed:
Lightweight, all-aluminum frames, independent suspension, aggressive tread wheels...
I mean, the minute you start pointing out the robotic welds, you've more or less picked your target audience.
posted by madajb at 4:58 PM on January 17 [1 favorite]

Though I guess it's a better response than replying to "I'm pregnant" by saying,"Don't worry! We can get rid of it!" without bothering to quiz the girlfriend on how she felt about being pregnant or give her time to think.
posted by discopolo at 4:59 PM on January 17

He didn't just wake up to this level of crazy because his wife got pregnant. Setting Guinness records has been his hobby and he's got several previous successes. Kiddo was just inspiration for the next round, and there was never an intention to actually put the baby in the turbo pram. Although on non-preview-but-edit I'd argue that yes it really is a pram if it could carry a baby, even if he wouldn't trust it with his own offspring.
posted by localroger at 5:00 PM on January 17

He didn't just wake up to this level of crazy because his wife got pregnant.

Not wife, girlfriend.
posted by discopolo at 5:02 PM on January 17

wham, bam
thank you, ma'am
see ya later
gotta scram
gonna create
a Turbo-Pram®
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 5:16 PM on January 17 [5 favorites]

So it's pretty fast, but is it weaponized?
posted by 23 at 6:00 PM on January 17 [1 favorite]

50 mph. No helmet. Yikes.
posted by Dasein at 6:59 PM on January 17

Thinking I should get my vasectomy reversed just so I can beat his record.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 7:02 PM on January 17

If I were the wife I'd be pissed that he's spending money on that shit and not on the kid.

The first night our son was home from the hospital, he wanted to be rocked. So, my husband engineered a small machine with some motors he had lying around to gently rock the car seat. It worked, though it was unsightly and made a rather annoying (to us, the baby didn't care) noise. He was terribly disappointed when I burst his marketing dreams by showing him the bouncy seat that we already owned that did the same thing.

My point here is that if his partner knew him well enough to have a baby with him, she saw this sort of thing coming.
posted by sonika at 8:04 PM on January 17 [2 favorites]

All my husband did was start cleaning the litterbox.
posted by galvanized unicorn at 8:57 PM on January 17 [1 favorite]

My point here is that if his partner knew him well enough to have a baby with him, she saw this sort of thing coming.

From the video: "When we started dating, I was building a Wall Of Death, so I think she's used to this by now."

People with awesome hobbies are awesome. The PopSci article says that the total cost for the build was $750 - not pocket change, but a lot of hobbies are significantly more expensive than that. I think they're doing just fine.
posted by ZsigE at 5:17 AM on January 18 [1 favorite]

Any time I hear anything about the Guinness Book of World Records I can't help but think of this exchange from "The King of Kong":

Daughter: I never knew that the Guinness World Record Book was so... I never knew it was so important.
Dad: I guess a lot of people are... yeah, a lot of people read that book.
Daughter: [while directly looking at her father] Some people sort of ruin their lives to be in there.

It doesn't always apply, but often does.
posted by IvoShandor at 6:50 AM on January 18 [1 favorite]

THERE BETTER BE A FIVE POINT HARNESS IN THAT STROLLER!!
posted by zizzle at 7:53 AM on January 18 [3 favorites]