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What Coke Contains
March 4, 2013 10:05 AM   Subscribe


 
Coke is delicious and wonderful. Also, MetaFilter, how I missed you.
posted by chunking express at 10:10 AM on March 4, 2013 [8 favorites]


... every can of Coke contains humanity’s choir.

Man, this guy can even be eloquent about burps!
posted by gurple at 10:11 AM on March 4, 2013 [6 favorites]


The secret ingredient is ❤ love ❤.
posted by mazola at 10:12 AM on March 4, 2013 [7 favorites]


Like every other tool, I am a product of our world entire and contain inventions that trace all the way back to the origins of our species.
posted by Nomyte at 10:13 AM on March 4, 2013 [5 favorites]


tl;dr that is actually based on the linked article:

Coke is a product that depends on a complicated global supply chain, much like almost every other mass-produced consumer good.
posted by Wretch729 at 10:14 AM on March 4, 2013 [3 favorites]


I'm pretty sure that a good deal of cans are made from recycled aluminium, at least in some countries. Either that or Eddie Izzard was lying to me.
posted by Jehan at 10:15 AM on March 4, 2013


This called to mind Joseph Addison in The Spectator 69:
Nature seems to have taken a particular care to disseminate her blessings among the different regions of the world, with an eye to this mutual intercourse and traffick among mankind, that the natives of the several parts of the globe might have a kind of dependence upon one another, and be united together by their common interest. Almost every degree produces something peculiar to it. The food often grows in one country, and the sauce in another. The fruits of Portugal are corrected by the products of Barbadoes: the infusion of a China plant sweetened with the pith of an Indian cane. The Philippick Islands give a flavour to our European bowls. The single dress of a woman of quality is often the product of a hundred climates. The muff and the fan come together from the different ends of the earth. The scarf is sent from the torrid zone, and the tippet from beneath the pole. The brocade Petticoat rises out of the mines of Peru, and the diamond necklace out of the bowels of Indostan.

If we consider our own country in its natural prospect, without any of the benefits and advantages of commerce, what a barren uncomfortable spot of earth falls to our share! Natural historians tell us, that no fruit grows originally among us, besides hips, and haws, acorns and pig-nuts, with other delicates of the like nature; that our climate of itself, and without the assistances of art, can make no further advances towards a plum than to a sloe, and carries an apple to no greater a perfection than a crab: that our melons, our peaches, our figs, our apricots, and cherries, are strangers among us, imported in different ages, and naturalised in our English gardens; and that they would all degenerate and fall away into the trash of our own country, if they were wholly neglected by the planter, and left to the mercy of our sun and soil. Nor has traffick more enriched our vegetable world, than it has improved the whole face of nature among us. Our ships are laden with the harvest of every climate; our tables are stored with spices, and oils, and wines: our rooms are filled with pyramids of china, and adorned with the workmanship of Japan: our morning’s draught comes to us from the remotest corners of the earth: we repair our bodies by the drugs of America, and repose ourselves under Indian canopies. My friend Sir Andrew calls the vineyards of France our gardens: the spice-islands our hot-beds; the Persians our silk-weavers, and the Chinese our potters. Nature indeed furnishes us with the bare necessaries of life, but traffick gives us greater variety of what is useful, and at the same time supplies us with everything that is convenient and ornamental. Nor is it the least part of this our happiness, that whilst we enjoy the remotest products of the north and south, we are free from those extremities of weather which give them birth; that our eyes are refreshed with the green fields of Britain, at the same time that our palates are feasted with fruits that rise between the tropicks.

For these reasons there are no more useful members in a commonwealth than merchants. They knit mankind together in a mutual intercourse of good offices, distribute the gifts of nature, find work for the poor, add wealth to the rich, and magnificence to the great. Our English merchant converts the tin of his own country into gold, and exchanges his wool for rubies. The Mahometans are clothed in our British manufacture, and the inhabitants of the frozen zone warmed with the fleeces of our sheep.
posted by yoink at 10:15 AM on March 4, 2013 [20 favorites]


Delicabetes?
posted by The Card Cheat at 10:17 AM on March 4, 2013 [2 favorites]


It's better than Pepsi, and good in cocktails, but overall I prefer root beer.

(last year, I went out for pizza with my toddler neices and nephew and when it came time to order drinks, the youngest (age 3 1/2) said "ooh ooh, rootbeer rootbeer!") An obvious prodigy)
posted by jonmc at 10:18 AM on March 4, 2013


Kevin Ashton is a terrific writer. (Carl Zimmer-esque - Zimmerific? - comes to mind)
Looking forward to reading his stuff in the future, thanks for the introduction.
posted by Auden at 10:19 AM on March 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


This isn't "what Coke contains", it's "how a can of Coke is made, including the can itself, the paint on it, and so on, but going back arbitrarily in the production chain depending on the writer's mood (the aluminium is extensively covered, the paints not at all).

So, yeah, like Carl Sagan said, to make apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe.
posted by Joakim Ziegler at 10:19 AM on March 4, 2013 [32 favorites]


Anyone else catch the subtle implied "HFCS=yummy, natural honey" ?
posted by Thorzdad at 10:20 AM on March 4, 2013 [18 favorites]


Coke is pure evil.

But Kosher Coke and Mexi-Coke two steps back into the light.
posted by Smart Dalek at 10:20 AM on March 4, 2013 [7 favorites]


Unfortunately, I had to stop reading when I discovered an error in the second paragraph.

The alumina is dissolved in a molten substance called cryolite, which is a rare mineral from Greenland...

In fact, cryolite from Greenland has not been used for years, because Greenland more-or-less ran out. A synthetic is used instead.

I'm annoyed that I had to stop, because it looked like a really interesting article. But I don't want to get my head stuffed with wrong facts which I'll later be embarrassed when I repeat to others.
posted by novalis_dt at 10:20 AM on March 4, 2013 [15 favorites]


Teach the controversy.

Also, Joakim wins.
posted by mrgrimm at 10:21 AM on March 4, 2013


$6.59 for a 12 pack of cola is a rip-off price. A little reading of the Sunday newspaper inserts and you can find 12 pack multi-buy deals for about $3.33 per pack before any cash-back schemes.

Also each 12 pack of cans has on it somewhere an image of a single can standing up. This tells you how to orient the case before opening it so the cans are right side up and don't roll out.

I drink too much cola (diet though because I am not THAT crazy).
posted by srboisvert at 10:21 AM on March 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


[String of comments removed. Do not shitbomb threads with first-comment rants, thank you.]
posted by cortex at 10:24 AM on March 4, 2013 [4 favorites]


$6.59 for a 12 pack of cola is a rip-off price. A little reading of the Sunday newspaper inserts and you can find 12 pack multi-buy deals for about $3.33 per pack before any cash-back schemes.

That price must have been without the Vons club card and including tax and CRV.
posted by birdherder at 10:24 AM on March 4, 2013


Anyone else catch the subtle implied "HFCS=yummy, natural honey" ?

As someone who thinks much of the hysteria over HFCS is silly, I was struck the other way--that he called it a "sugar substitute" when it is clearly a sugar. What he said about the ratio of fructose to glucose in HFCS and how similar it is to honey is simply factually correct (in fact, when HFCS is used to adulterate honey it takes quite sophisticated chemical testing to discover it).
posted by yoink at 10:25 AM on March 4, 2013 [7 favorites]


I visited the Coca Cola museum in Atlanta (file photo, more) and holy shit, that place is basically the closest thing America has ever built to the Parthenon, except instead of a tribute to Athena Parthenos, it is a tribute to Capitalism.
posted by griphus at 10:26 AM on March 4, 2013 [7 favorites]


Every can of Coke is produced ex nihlo. All else is heresy.
posted by blue_beetle at 10:28 AM on March 4, 2013 [3 favorites]


file photo

INTRUDER ALERT! INTRUDER ALERT!
posted by yoink at 10:28 AM on March 4, 2013


Less than a half-ounce of pulverized Grunka Lunka per liter.
posted by entropicamericana at 10:29 AM on March 4, 2013


The number of individuals who know how to make a can of Coke is zero.

Wow. I have a weird co-mingling of love and hate for that factoid.
posted by Rock Steady at 10:29 AM on March 4, 2013 [2 favorites]


I visited the Coca Cola museum in Atlanta (file photo, more) and holy shit, that place is basically the closest thing America has ever built to the Parthenon, except instead of a tribute to Athena Parthenos, it is a tribute to Capitalism.

I also went there! It was a pretty bad time.
posted by Greg Nog at 10:31 AM on March 4, 2013


The number of individuals who know how to make a can of Coke is zero.

But...you just...told us how to make a can of Coke.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 10:32 AM on March 4, 2013 [3 favorites]


Wasn't there a character in World War Z who gives a similar speech about root beer that—instead of glorifying "humanity's choir"—highlighted the horrors of globalization?
posted by Terminal Verbosity at 10:35 AM on March 4, 2013 [3 favorites]


This isn't "what Coke contains", it's "how a can of Coke is made, including the can itself, the paint on it, and so on, but going back arbitrarily in the production chain depending on the writer's mood (the aluminium is extensively covered, the paints not at all).
Only a bit of the article is about the can.
posted by Flunkie at 10:35 AM on March 4, 2013 [3 favorites]


If it weren't for rum I'd have no use for coke at all.
posted by cjorgensen at 10:35 AM on March 4, 2013 [3 favorites]


If it weren't for rum I'd have no use for coke at all.

How dare you besmirch Jack Daniels like that.
posted by shakespeherian at 10:37 AM on March 4, 2013 [6 favorites]


I was just about to second Greg Nog and mention the Beverly, but it looks like I got there faster last time.
posted by yellowbinder at 10:38 AM on March 4, 2013


The secret ingredient is ❤ love ❤.

I'd like the world to build a coke ...
posted by carter at 10:39 AM on March 4, 2013 [2 favorites]


EmpressCallipygos: But...you just...told us how to make a can of Coke.

Well, he told us how a can of Coke is made, but I know I did not get enough info out of that article to go out and make a can of Coke myself. We didn't even get a proper recipe for the Coke, much less the manufacturing of the can.
posted by Rock Steady at 10:39 AM on March 4, 2013


But it's impossible to criticize Coke in a vacuum.

PROS:
Nearly 5 times as much beverage as a 2-liter bottle.
Great conversation piece.

CONS:
Unusually gritty.
Difficult to pour or drink out of.
Does not fit in any regulation-size cupholder.
Undulating red sack scaring pets.

4/10
posted by griphus at 10:39 AM on March 4, 2013 [31 favorites]


But...you just...told us how to make a can of Coke.
Let's see you do it, then.
posted by fantabulous timewaster at 10:41 AM on March 4, 2013 [2 favorites]


Step 1: punch some trees...
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 10:43 AM on March 4, 2013 [12 favorites]


I am a machine that turns Coke into Network Administration.

However, next week, with Daylight Stupid Time, I am giving it up entirely. First, I consume far too much. Second, I consume far too much.

I gotta buy/build a sodastream though. I like me some carbonated fizzy drinks.
posted by Pogo_Fuzzybutt at 10:47 AM on March 4, 2013 [3 favorites]


My wife is a slave to what she calls "the magical brown fluid" but she upped the ante when I foolishly bought an 18 bottle case of Mexi-Coke at a Costco. Now she's always got two backup cases and even the Costco price is like buying actual cocaine.
posted by Ber at 10:49 AM on March 4, 2013 [6 favorites]


Somewhere near the conclusion, one should mentally add ".... and Coke is a very simple product."

All he covered there was the syrup and the aluminum in the can, and totally elided the paints and internal coatings. But, as complex as that is, 'taint 'nothing.

Look at the computer you're using right now, and marvel.
posted by Malor at 10:52 AM on March 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


I gotta buy/build a sodastream though. I like me some carbonated fizzy drinks.

Good luck trying to figure out the exact combination of syrup:soda that won't make it taste like either a) bee food or b) RC Cola that an icecube melted in.
posted by griphus at 10:53 AM on March 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


Just like Leonard Reed's "I, Pencil"
posted by DreamerFi at 10:53 AM on March 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


The Mexi-Coke that they sell at my Costco comes in packs of 24 12-oz bottles, costing about $20. It's far from the mega-huge servings you get of the HFCS stuff, but I consider that a net benefit.

Even Mexi-Coke doesn't have the bite to it that I remember from Coke when I was a youngster. I'm not sure if that's because my older tastebuds aren't as sensitive, or if it's still not quite the same stuff I used to drink as a kid.

It's a lot closer than the regular kind, though.
posted by Malor at 10:59 AM on March 4, 2013


Have you ever thought about how much goes into a simple 404 error?
posted by TedW at 11:04 AM on March 4, 2013


I'm confused as to why, in writing an article about a "can" of Coke, he used a bottle as a graphic.
posted by HuronBob at 11:07 AM on March 4, 2013 [2 favorites]


My question is, "What happens to the aine they take out of the coke in the US authorized factory in northern New Jersey?" Does that make Coke kinda like decaf, and what does that make caffeine free Diet Coke. Why even put the coca leaf in there if it doesn't have any punch? Does coca leaf have a flavor?
posted by Xurando at 11:07 AM on March 4, 2013


Shit; my 404 error link should go here.
posted by TedW at 11:14 AM on March 4, 2013


This is in a very similar vein as the famous "I Pencil"
posted by travis08 at 11:19 AM on March 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


This article beautifully sums up why I like to drink Coke and will never drink Pepsi.
posted by mazola at 11:20 AM on March 4, 2013


So...I'm always interested in the difference between people's self-reported tastes and what double-blinded taste-tests show. I was wondering about the Mexican Coke vs. US Coke one, and I found a really good--and unusually thorough--double-blinded taste test online.

The takeaway is complex. One thing to note at the outset is that it isn't possible to ascribe this difference simply to cane sugar vs. HFCS: Coke uses a different flavor formula in Mexico than it does in the States, so the exact contribution of the cane sugar/HFCS difference to the different responses is impossible to state.

Basically the findings were as follows. Tasters unanimously preferred US coke to Mexican coke if all other things were equal (i.e., if they were drinking out of the same type of vessel in each case). A subset of tasters preferred any coke from a glass vessel to any coke from a plastic vessel.

But here's, to me, the really telling finding (although it is one of those telling findings that everyone automatically exempts themselves from): if you told people that they were drinking "US Coke" or "Mexican Coke" they unanimously preferred the one they thought they preferred prior to the trial. That is, even if you switched labels on them, they reported higher satisfaction with whichever drink was labeled as "their established favorite." It seems to me that this kind of 'taste-priming' effect (where you experience what you expect to experience), which is so incredibly powerful and is found again and again in all of these kinds of tests (e.g., people preferring the wine that comes from the 'expensive wine' bottle to the wine that comes from the 'cheap wine' bottle--even when they are the exact same wine, or the wines are switched) should make us all extremely leery of putting trust in our own firmly held taste preferences. Instead, most people seem to take away the conclusion that "other people are idiots, but I know what I like."
posted by yoink at 11:24 AM on March 4, 2013 [5 favorites]


A bacteria, called "Bacillus", eh?
posted by littlejohnnyjewel at 11:25 AM on March 4, 2013 [7 favorites]


HFCS is made by grinding wet corn until it becomes cornstarch. The cornstarch is mixed with an enzyme secreted by a rod-shaped bacterium called Bacillus and an enzyme secreted by a mold called Aspergillus. This process creates the glucose. A third enzyme, also derived from bacteria, is then used to turn some of the glucose into fructose.

As long as it's artisan glucose, I'm fine with that. I just want to know that the enzymes are lovingly crafted by Bacillus bacteria who are being fairly treated by Coca-Cola management.
posted by wolfdreams01 at 11:28 AM on March 4, 2013 [4 favorites]


And, the top 1% have far more cans of Coke than the rest of us.
posted by dukes909 at 11:53 AM on March 4, 2013


Having a Coke with You

is even more fun than going to San Sebastian, Irún, Hendaye, Biarritz, Bayonne
or being sick to my stomach on the Travesera de Gracia in Barcelona
partly because in your orange shirt you look like a better happier St. Sebastian
partly because of my love for you, partly because of your love for yoghurt
partly because of the fluorescent orange tulips around the birches
partly because of the secrecy our smiles take on before people and statuary
it is hard to believe when I’m with you that there can be anything as still
as solemn as unpleasantly definitive as statuary when right in front of it
in the warm New York 4 o’clock light we are drifting back and forth
between each other like a tree breathing through its spectacles

and the portrait show seems to have no faces in it at all, just paint
you suddenly wonder why in the world anyone ever did them

I look
at you and I would rather look at you than all the portraits in the world
except possibly for the Polish Rider occasionally and anyway it’s in the Frick
which thank heavens you haven’t gone to yet so we can go together the first time
and the fact that you move so beautifully more or less takes care of Futurism
just as at home I never think of the Nude Descending a Staircase or
at a rehearsal a single drawing of Leonardo or Michelangelo that used to wow me
and what good does all the research of the Impressionists do them
when they never got the right person to stand near the tree when the sun sank
or for that matter Marino Marini when he didn’t pick the rider as carefully
as the horse

it seems they were all cheated of some marvelous experience
which is not going to go wasted on me which is why I am telling you about it


--Frank O’Hara
posted by Catchfire at 11:55 AM on March 4, 2013 [4 favorites]


What's great about this country is that America started the tradition where the richest consumers buy essentially the same things as the poorest. You can be watching TV and see Coca-Cola, and you know that the President drinks Coke, Liz Taylor drinks Coke, and just think, you can drink Coke, too. A Coke is a Coke and no amount of money can get you a better Coke than the one the bum on the corner is drinking. All the Cokes are the same and all the Cokes are good. Liz Taylor knows it, the President knows it, the bum knows it, and you know it.
--Andy Warhol
posted by Catchfire at 11:56 AM on March 4, 2013 [13 favorites]


Coke tastes like robot sweat. Not that there's anything wrong with that.
posted by Ron Thanagar at 11:57 AM on March 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


I just want to know that the enzymes are lovingly crafted by Bacillus bacteria who are being fairly treated by Coca-Cola management.

You--and any other Coke addict--will want to avoid reading Belching out the Devil: global adventures with Coca-Cola then. It's written by a British comedian but the labor abuses and land destruction he uncovers just aren't funny. At all.
posted by librarylis at 12:00 PM on March 4, 2013


The article is interesting in that its account of Coke’s creation is almost devoid of people. There’s no reference to miners, workers, or (for that matter) consumers, just an abstract reference to “minds” in the last paragraph.

This is notable given that the author’s point seems to be, given the last paragraph:
Look at the fascinating and complex tapestry of “invention and intelligence” that is required to create such a seemingly simple product as a can of Coke. Marvel at the connections!

And I do marvel, but I don’t know that it’s enough for the author to write this piece without contextualizing it further.

Coca-Cola is a company that has done some terrible things, and that makes many people upset. I am not convinced that they’re uniquely evil. They're so big that their evil has broad reaching consequences, much like Walmart, but I don't know that it is meaningfully different from their rivals' or from any other major transnational corporation. Coke also gives extensively through its corporate philanthropy (although this too is not without controversy).

That doesn’t excuse their undeniably terrible anti-labor and anti-environment record. Yet it's impossible to criticize Coke in a vacuum. The lifestyle of the developed world is dependent on systematic, often brutal and unsustainable, exploitation of workers and natural resources. That doesn't mean individuals shouldn't refuse to patronize Coke or that one shouldn't lobby the company to change its ways, but I don't see how snark helps things. Coca-Cola is responding to specific incentives that are part of the structure of our economy and society, and greed is a motive as old as humanity.

There aren't any easy answers but I wish we could spend more time discussing how to achieve a sustainable society without sacrificing our standard of living, or at least how to best choose what sacrifices might realistically be made, than preaching to the (meta)choir about the evils of a given transnational.
posted by Wretch729 at 12:04 PM on March 4, 2013 [4 favorites]


In the late 1990's I designed and installed two controllers which were used for a few years by the local Coca-Cola bottling plant before they switched from scales to cheaper (but less accurate) volumetric controls.

A typical batch was 10,000 gallons, or 80,000 pounds total. Not of Coke, but of syrup, which would then be diluted with carbonated water to make actual Coke.

Other than the water and syrup, ingredients arrive in drums labeled "Part A, "Part B" etc. which are pre-mixed in such a way as to conceal what they are exactly to people who work with them every day. Fun fact: Several of those components are hazardous materials. The drums of phosphoric acid are a corrosion hazard, the minor flavor components are dissolved in nearly pure flammable ethyl alcohol, and a 500 pound drum of NutraSweet is a fine powder explosion hazard.

The pure sassafras oil that flavors root beer is so potent that one gallon is enough to flavor one of those batches.

It takes a couple of hours to mix a batch, and when I was servicing the site typically a two man crew would be running two batches at the same time, lettin one system mix while they loaded another. There were four tanks in the room but only two were on load cells. Eventually instead of fitting the other two tanks out as scales they took out the scales and ran all four systems based on flow meters.

This was, incidentally, one of the smaller bottling plants that mainly services Louisiana and southern Mississippi.
posted by localroger at 12:06 PM on March 4, 2013 [6 favorites]


The second ingredient, caramel coloring, gives the drink its distinctive dark brown color.
Distinctive? Uhhh, Coke is the exact same color as every other cola, root beer, and Dr Pepper knock-off available.

Anyway, I guess now we know everything we need to mix up a nice grog & Coke!
posted by aubilenon at 12:10 PM on March 4, 2013


I once had to work with someone from Coca-Cola corp. on a consulting gig who told me that each can of coke has about 700 chemical reactions occurring as it ages.
posted by telstar at 12:27 PM on March 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


I'm confused as to why, in writing an article about a "can" of Coke, he used a bottle as a graphic.

I do not think the author and the graphic designer are the same person. From the point of view of the designer, this is an article about Coke. The Coke bottle is iconic; the Coke can is not.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 12:30 PM on March 4, 2013


that he called it a "sugar substitute" when it is clearly a sugar

I think it is reasonable to assume that the average non-biochemist will tend to equate sugar with sucrose rather than thinking about it as a class of compounds. Do you similarly object to people calling potassium chloride a "salt substitute," when it is clearly a salt?
posted by solotoro at 1:11 PM on March 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


I read that in the voice of the narrator on How It's Made. I felt like I should put on some elevator music while I was reading it.
posted by dirigibleman at 1:17 PM on March 4, 2013 [4 favorites]


Thorzdad: "Anyone else catch the subtle implied "HFCS=yummy, natural honey" ?"

The guy is a former Brand Manager for Proctor and Gamble. Not a surprising position for someone like him, but grotesque either way.
posted by Big_B at 1:31 PM on March 4, 2013


Telstar, then you would marvel at the tens of thousands of chemical reactions that take place in live beer as it ages.

I can not link from this device but Google metabolic pathways poster to see a map of just the ones that take place inside the yeast cells.
posted by Doroteo Arango II at 1:32 PM on March 4, 2013


My suspicion continues to grow that I am possibly the only person in America who has never consumed an entire can or bottle of Coke. I have tasted it a few times, but that shit is nasty.

(I also hate chocolate. These two facts are often used by friends and acquaintances to suggest that I may not actually be human.)

Anyway, this seems as good a time as any to commit to the internet (because I haven't been able to find it there) a radio jingle my mother remembered from her childhood in the 1930s:

Go ahead and drink it, Nola!
It ain't nothin' but a Coca Cola!

posted by trip and a half at 1:43 PM on March 4, 2013


I appreciate the engineering behind an aluminum can of coke now; but I an also now more aware of the enviromental resources involed in producing each can and volume filled can of coke.

Happily going to slice a lime for a 0.5 litre of said product later eespite the new info.
posted by buzzman at 1:47 PM on March 4, 2013


Look at all these little things! So busy now! Notice how each one is useful. A lovely ballet ensues, so full of form and color. Now, think about all those people that created them. Technicians, engineers, hundreds of people, who will be able to feed their children tonight, so those children can grow up big and strong and have little teeny children of their own, and so on and so forth. Thus, adding to the great chain of life. You see, father, by causing a little destruction, I am in fact encouraging life. In reality, you and I are in the same business.
posted by iamabot at 2:00 PM on March 4, 2013 [5 favorites]


Aluminum does have the benefit of being very friendly to recycling, without a lot of the hassle and waster of plastic.

I am an ongoing experiment: almost all of the liquid I drink is diet coke, and has been for a long, long time. It is my hope to download my consciousness into the sentient tumors I am nurturing.
posted by maxwelton at 2:06 PM on March 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


You're a monster, iamabot!
posted by aubilenon at 2:06 PM on March 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


I really like Pepsi Max.
posted by turgid dahlia 2 at 2:25 PM on March 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


trip and a half: ... I...never consumed an entire can or bottle of Coke...that shit is nasty. I also hate chocolate. These two facts are often used by friends and acquaintances to suggest that I may not actually be human...

In all seriousness: what kinds of flavors do you like?

Though it is incomprehensible to me, not liking chocolate doesn't make you subhuman
posted by double block and bleed at 2:59 PM on March 4, 2013 [2 favorites]


iamabot gets all my Internet points today for an apropos quote from one of my all-time favorite movies (not to mention one of my all-time favorite Gary Oldman moments).

That your gender is noted as "Soda Can" in your profile is also fitting. ;)
posted by Celsius1414 at 3:45 PM on March 4, 2013


Goddamn I love me some Coca-Cola.
posted by grubi at 4:26 PM on March 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


In all seriousness: what kinds of flavors do you like?

Thanks for the pass, double block and bleed! Seriously, I'm all about the salt.
posted by trip and a half at 4:35 PM on March 4, 2013


The article reads like they were trying for Up-Goer Five style but couldn't bring themselves to abandon the technical terms.
posted by radwolf76 at 6:00 PM on March 4, 2013


jonmc: "It's better than Pepsi, and good in cocktails, but overall I prefer root beer."

But a well-crafted root beer isn't a beverage, so much as a dessert.
posted by Dr. Zira at 6:40 PM on March 4, 2013


Is it levamisole?
posted by pompomtom at 7:00 PM on March 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


Anyone else catch the subtle implied "HFCS=yummy, natural honey" ?

Bees love HFCS. Ask an apiarist.
posted by obiwanwasabi at 2:27 AM on March 5, 2013


I was wondering why I felt so parched after drinking a Coke. Apparently, it's the sulfur.
posted by baniak at 7:33 AM on March 5, 2013


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