Join 3,374 readers in helping fund MetaFilter (Hide)


And this one's the Half Double Decaf Half-Windsor, With A Twist of Lemon
February 19, 2014 3:24 PM   Subscribe

Random necktie knot generator

Inspired by the unusual knot worn by The Merovingian in The Matrix Reloaded, mathematician Mikael Vejdemo-Johansson has calculated 177,147 ways to tie a necktie and created this handy online tool so you can try them all out.
posted by prize bull octorok (33 comments total) 15 users marked this as a favorite

 
posted by prize bull octorok The Whelk
posted by Going To Maine at 3:31 PM on February 19 [1 favorite]


Your tie is: R-608 with sequence WWTWTTWWWUTTU

I'll be sure to remember that next time I pull out a tie that's three meters long and wonder what to do with it.
posted by Wolfdog at 3:34 PM on February 19 [3 favorites]


I'll have a twist of lemon.
posted by The Tensor at 3:43 PM on February 19 [3 favorites]


Pretty much every time I tie a necktie it's random.
posted by mazola at 3:43 PM on February 19 [5 favorites]


All these, seemingly endless variations and yet I don't see the Konami knot: up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A
posted by BigHeartedGuy at 3:48 PM on February 19 [1 favorite]


If you need a hand with some of these - AGREEorDIE.
posted by unliteral at 3:49 PM on February 19


Four in hand or GTFO.

Although I admit to the occasional half-Windsor if I'm wearing a long tie with high-waisted pants. Keeps the tip close to the belt buckle That's what she said
posted by backseatpilot at 3:54 PM on February 19 [1 favorite]


Who needs anything more than the elegant Shelby?

Please.
posted by GenjiandProust at 4:03 PM on February 19


Oh fuck. If I can manage to tie the damn thing and not injure myself in the process or have the little end sticking out, I'm happy. I don't care what the knot is called.
posted by octothorpe at 4:36 PM on February 19


Half-Windsor? I hardly knew her.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 4:36 PM on February 19 [2 favorites]


I had the bright idea last year of thinking that I should buy a real bow-tie and tie it myself. This did not go well.
posted by octothorpe at 4:45 PM on February 19 [1 favorite]


For a more empirical approach, there are these - with pocket square bonus!
posted by Dreidl at 5:15 PM on February 19 [1 favorite]


There is no reason to ever use a knot besides the half-Windsor. Or the Four-in-Hand if you're one of those fancy types.
posted by Justinian at 5:19 PM on February 19


I'm a fan of the Prince Albert – it's like a four-in-hand but a little bigger, has that nice asymmetry for less formal tie-wearing – and the Shelby (aka Pratt) because it's easy and gives a nice dimple.

Also I dig a four-in-hand on a spaghetti tie, I can't imagine any other knot on a tie with a 1" blade.
posted by Scientist at 5:20 PM on February 19


Seriously, the The Whelk signal must be malfunctioning. He should be on this like Turnbull on Asser.
posted by Madamina at 5:36 PM on February 19 [3 favorites]


I like these threads where I have no idea at all if people are talking about real examples of the thing under discussion or just making up silly names for fun (have worn a tie on two occasions in my life--both times tied by someone else).

"Four in hand"? What, you grab four fucking ties at once and tie them all around your neck? Or you administer ties to four people in some kind of origami/sartorial simulgasm? The Shelby? As worn by the founder of Shelbyville?
posted by yoink at 5:45 PM on February 19 [1 favorite]


Seriously, the The Whelk signal must be malfunctioning. He should be on this like Turnbull on Asser.

A terrible four-in-hand snarl has him momentarily delayed.
posted by yoink at 5:46 PM on February 19 [2 favorites]


When I found this site, my first thought was that The Whelk must surely have posted it already.
posted by prize bull octorok at 5:55 PM on February 19


Check out these Elastic Ties, y'all:
Our range of neck ties are woven from high quality polyester and silk fabric that makes them look sophisticated and expensive. These neck ties are available in a variety of patterns and sizes, these neck ties are an ideal gift item. These neck ties can be worn with any formal wear and these enhance the look of wearer.

posted by oceanjesse at 6:21 PM on February 19


I'm mostly a bow tie man myself, but I do like The Lovecraft.
posted by usonian at 6:43 PM on February 19 [2 favorites]


There is no reason to ever use a knot besides the half-Windsor. Or the Four-in-Hand if you're one of those fancy types.

See, now, but for me the Four-in-Hand was taught as the basic "how to tie a tie", and it wasn't until not that long ago that I learned there were other ways to do it.

So now I tend to go with the half-Windsor because it suits my chunky build better, and more importantly is slightly less likely to make me feel like I'm slowly strangling to death.

But I don't wear ties very often, thus remembering two ways to tie them is about all my middle-aged brain can handle.

So maybe next time I have to wear a tie I'll use the random generator. Then I'll have a good excuse for showing up late looking like hell.
posted by soundguy99 at 6:52 PM on February 19


I wear the Christiansen, Onassis, and Trinity most often. My bow ties are double-tied (that is, I go around the middle twice) if long enough. I am working 5- and 6-bight versions of the Trinity concept right now.
posted by Dreidl at 7:16 PM on February 19


My clip-ons have fancy metal clips. None of that plastic junk for me.
posted by Cookiebastard at 7:34 PM on February 19 [1 favorite]


Growing up, I was taught the Full Windsor. But I thought that took up too much of the tie's length. At some point I tried the Half Windsor but felt it too unsymmetrical. Leaving me not entirely satisfied, until I found the book The 85 Ways to Tie A Tie. With my additional preference for a knot that "fell apart" when you pulled out the narrow end, I eventually settled on a knot that was not one of the four usual ones, the one which is notated, in the notation of that book, LRCRLCT. Been using that ever since and quite happy with it. (Per the linked website, this is apparently the co-half-Windsor, although I didn't know that name until just now.)
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 7:55 PM on February 19 [1 favorite]


mathematician Mikael Vejdemo-Johansson has calculated 177,147 ways to tie a necktie and created this handy online tool so you can try them all out

Overhead, without any fuss, the stars are going out.
posted by sebastienbailard at 12:50 AM on February 20 [8 favorites]


I'm a fan of the Prince Albert – it's like a four-in-hand but a little bigger, has that nice asymmetry ...

Is it wrong of me that I expected this comment to go somewhere else entirely?
posted by GenjiandProust at 1:47 AM on February 20 [3 favorites]


There is also this resource for tie knots.
posted by backseatpilot at 5:52 AM on February 20


I've been trying the random generator every few days for about two weeks now. The knots it comes up with are pretty uniformly terrible, and require serious tweaking to wear in public. I would recommend tying a lot of different tie knots (including some of the newer decorative narrow-end knots like the Trinity and the Eldridge) in order to get a feel for what works and what doesn't before you mess with the random tie knot generator. That way, when the knot turns out terrible (and it will), you have some ideas of how to fix it.

On the other hand, once tweaked, some of the resulting knots can look very nice. I even found one worth putting into my regular rotation.
posted by yeolcoatl at 6:41 AM on February 20


MetaFilter: once tweaked, some of the resulting knots can look very nice
posted by GenjiandProust at 7:32 AM on February 20 [1 favorite]


Also, I am now imagining that The Whelk has not commented yet because he is trying every knot before joining in, on the KTMFA principle.

In the interest of full disclosure, I now have "KTMFA -- the knot against war" running in my head, and I have to go teach....
posted by GenjiandProust at 7:34 AM on February 20 [1 favorite]


I spent all of middle school and high school using the four in hand, and I always ALWAYS hated the asymmetry. But thanks to YouTube I can now tie a Half Windsor, so my need for neckwear bilateral symmetry is satisfied.
posted by Elementary Penguin at 8:11 AM on February 20


There are 177,147 knots that this thing can generate - a power of 3. This makes me suspect that it's exhaustively generating knots and not doing any sort of filtering for "does this knot not suck". And to be fair to the authors, they're only claiming to generate possible knots, not ones you'd actually want to use.

(Disclaimer: I know the authors. Two of them have slept in my guest bedroom.)
posted by madcaptenor at 8:15 AM on February 20


guys it turns out one of the knots is actually the summoning ritual for a Portal Of Pain and i've spent the last eternity in a nightmarish hellscape of unfathomable woe

plus the narrow knot doesn't flatter wide-spread collars
posted by The Whelk at 11:37 AM on February 20 [2 favorites]


« Older Want to talk about House of Cards online without s...  |  More than 50 million Americans... Newer »


This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments