I want to be a nice skeleton when they excavate me
September 10, 2014 1:28 PM   Subscribe

I lay my fingertip there, just inside the socket, where some of the bone is chipped away: it was pecked out, by the beaks of vultures. These are the markings the huge black birds made when they consumed her eyes, with the permission of her family.
The Oxford American on the people who work at, and the people who choose to donate their bodies to, the Forensic Anthropology Research Facility in San Marcos, Texas, the largest of America’s five “body farms.”
posted by frimble (43 comments total) 29 users marked this as a favorite
 
You know, when I worked in the hospital, my worst days were those in which I had to take the person whom I had cared for for days and days and weeks, feeding, caring, turning bathing, comforting, tucking in, getting up, keeping warm, and put her into a refrigerator in the morgue. I remember the first time, and the horror I felt when the blast of cold air flew out and I had to put her in there wrapped in nothing but a cheap plastic body bag and no blanket. That over 30 years ago and I still can't forget it.

I know there must be a fascinating story behind that link, but I can't click on it.
posted by SLC Mom at 1:57 PM on September 10, 2014 [22 favorites]


My niece is off to college with an eye to Forensic Anthropology. I've made her promise that if she ever goes to a body farm she has to take me too. And given the look in her eye when she mentions them I suspect it won't be long.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 2:41 PM on September 10, 2014


I made arrangements recently for my body to go to a medical school, with a second medical school as backup. But both of them caution that they might not be able to take a body at any particular time because they are full up, or for various other reasons. I'm hoping there's a place like this in the Northeast so I can list it as another backup.
posted by beagle at 2:46 PM on September 10, 2014


For those interested, the five body farms are listed here.
posted by beagle at 2:49 PM on September 10, 2014 [1 favorite]


Forensic Anthropology Research Facility

That acronym is so close to BARF.
posted by resurrexit at 3:06 PM on September 10, 2014 [3 favorites]


Bone Anthropology Research Facility
posted by Jahaza at 3:08 PM on September 10, 2014


For myself, I favor the Dead Like Me approach: "Bodies are easy. Dig a ditch, light a match."
posted by adipocere at 3:08 PM on September 10, 2014


My friend is doing a story for the discovery channel for this place, I gave her a ride down there in exchange that she showed me pictures. Totally fascinating what they do down there.

The weirdest part is that vultures don't eat any part of the body in the shade. As in, right up to where the shade line is, less than a quarter inch, so you have these half eaten, half mummified corpses lying half under a tree, half in the sun. It's wild, and that's just one of the mind-blowing things she told me.
posted by Annika Cicada at 3:27 PM on September 10, 2014 [4 favorites]


that's just one of the mind-blowing things she told me.

Do go on...
posted by Huck500 at 3:54 PM on September 10, 2014 [6 favorites]


I don't consider myself at all squeamish, but I got a page or two into that article and couldn't go on. I guess I need to adjust my squeamishness self-assessment.
posted by mudpuppie at 4:10 PM on September 10, 2014


I've had to sit through a handful of documentaries on sky burial and make appropriately respectful/appreciative murmurings at the end of each so I am all out of squeam.
posted by poffin boffin at 4:15 PM on September 10, 2014 [1 favorite]


How many documentaries on sky burials are there?
posted by curious nu at 4:17 PM on September 10, 2014


enough that I don't have to see any more, ideally.
posted by poffin boffin at 4:28 PM on September 10, 2014 [2 favorites]


There is a tale that I read but can't seem to confirm of a woman who willed her body to one of either Tulane or Loyola here in New Orleans, let's assume she was a Tulane graduate. She willed her corpse to Loyola.

Long before she died she had "Fuck Loyola" tattooed on her ass.

My friend Drew wants to be stuffed or taxidermied - whichever is the proper term. I told him I would happily accomodate his corpse in my living room so long as it is in a useful upright posture, like for hanging coats.
posted by vapidave at 4:40 PM on September 10, 2014


Must include a link to Stiff: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers by Mary Roach.
posted by mrbill at 4:41 PM on September 10, 2014 [7 favorites]


I read a book called 'Death's Acre' by Bill Bass about the body farm in Tennessee. It was really well done, with a minimum of 'the gory stuff'. If you are at all interested, I'd highly recommend it. Especially for Huck500.
posted by dfm500 at 4:45 PM on September 10, 2014 [2 favorites]


See also: Sally Mann's Body Farm series, the making of which is documented in the excellent film What Remains.
posted by oulipian at 5:42 PM on September 10, 2014 [1 favorite]


My friend Drew wants to be stuffed or taxidermied

I'd like to be mummified, but only if I can then shamble around for the rest of eternity. Being stuck in a tomb would be boring.
posted by curious nu at 6:18 PM on September 10, 2014 [1 favorite]


I've told my father that when he dies I plan to have him taxidermied in an attack pose as a conversation piece. He seemed pretty pleased about this.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 6:40 PM on September 10, 2014 [6 favorites]


I'd really like to leave my body as food for animals, just as an apology to Nature. Let met return to the Earth, as meat and as shit, as every other animal on this Earth has done since the beginning of time.
posted by SPrintF at 6:49 PM on September 10, 2014 [7 favorites]


I just watched the episode of Six Feed Under where Nate buries Lisa, so this is like totally relevant.
posted by localroger at 6:54 PM on September 10, 2014 [2 favorites]


This is a really interesting story, thanks. From what I could tell from the wiki page on body farms linked by beagle, it looks like the only ones in existence currently are in the US with one being considered in India. And other than the Univ. of Tennessee, the facilities are all relatively new, having been opened in the last ten years. Which leads me to believe that this may be kind of a newish and burgeoning area of research within forensic anthropology? Pretty interesting if it is and I'd be interested in reading more about it.
posted by triggerfinger at 7:17 PM on September 10, 2014


My family (mostly in the medical field) have donated their bodies to "science," usually to a medical school. This seems to be a reasonable way to make use of your corpse. However, I have heard rumors of donated bodies being funneled to the military to test weapons (this body blows up real good!). True/False? I don't know, but this practice makes me more squeamish than this article's documentation of a practical use of dead bodies.
posted by kozad at 7:28 PM on September 10, 2014


However, I have heard rumors of donated bodies being funneled to the military to test weapons (this body blows up real good!)

It's all about what happens to others. On the body farm you contribute to figuring out what happened to people who aren't decomposing under controlled conditions. In the lab where you get shredded you contribute to figuring out what will happen to the living when they are subject to accidents or attacks. But in neither case are "you" there, and what happens to your body in the end is almost always cremation.

You can have a last contribution to society if you aren't bothered by the desecration of your corpse, but being dead you won't have any agency over what that contribution will be.
posted by localroger at 7:42 PM on September 10, 2014 [1 favorite]


If my body ends up being used for testing military-grade weapons so that the military can figure out how to repair the damage done to our service people by those weapons/similar weapons, I'd be happy. Granted, I won't be there and I'll have no idea that someone shot/blew up/shredded my corpse. It's all about what the testing will do for living people.
posted by LOLAttorney2009 at 7:48 PM on September 10, 2014


Really interesting. I'm assuming these are findable with Google Maps, one of you awesome enterprising devils out there?
posted by nevercalm at 8:01 PM on September 10, 2014


I read this the other day- it's very good. The two people she focuses on and their friends and family are what made it possible to read through the biological details. It was life affirming, an excellent antidote to the articles posted the other day about the unhappy death investigator.
posted by oneirodynia at 8:23 PM on September 10, 2014 [1 favorite]


My dad, too, Mrs. Pterodactyl!
posted by bitter-girl.com at 8:31 PM on September 10, 2014


This would be a great location for a Mefi picnic meetup!
posted by srboisvert at 8:58 PM on September 10, 2014


taxidermied in an attack pose

Just out of curiosity, what would a paternal attack pose look like exactly?
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 9:42 PM on September 10, 2014


That was a pretty neat article, thanks for posting it.

I would like to be fed to sea creatures or pigs, to return the favor that those various tasty species have done me. I see that at least one of those institutions tries to mimic clandestine body disposal - maybe (after a long healthy happy life) my remains can find their way there.

(Of course, my survivors have my permission and indeed instruction to do whatever makes them feel best in their time of grief. Taxidermy or stupid Western burial process or whatever.)
posted by gingerest at 10:35 PM on September 10, 2014 [1 favorite]


>Just out of curiosity, what would a paternal attack pose look like exactly?

Glasses down on the bridge of the nose, just a slight tensing of the corners of the mouth. Sitting at the dinner table, leaning back, but not relaxed. I'm assuming we're talking psychological/emotional attack here?
posted by DGStieber at 10:43 PM on September 10, 2014 [2 favorites]


enough that I don't have to see any more, ideally.

Sheesh, what's eating you?
posted by sebastienbailard at 10:51 PM on September 10, 2014


...
This grass is very dark to be from the white heads of old mothers,
Darker than the colorless beards of old men,
Dark to come from under the faint red roofs of mouths.

O I perceive after all so many uttering tongues,
And I perceive they do not come from the roofs of mouths for nothing.

I wish I could translate the hints about the dead young men and women,
And the hints about old men and mothers, and the offspring taken soon out of their laps.

What do you think has become of the young and old men?
And what do you think has become of the women and children?

They are alive and well somewhere,
The smallest sprout shows there is really no death,
And if ever there was it led forward life, and does not wait at the end to arrest it,
And ceas’d the moment life appear’d.

All goes onward and outward, nothing collapses,
And to die is different from what any one supposed, and luckier.

...
--Walt Whitman, Song of Myself (1892 Edition)
posted by DGStieber at 10:51 PM on September 10, 2014 [7 favorites]


One consequence of taking gross anatomy and doing full-body dissections is that I decided I want to have as little subcutaneous fat and as well defined muscles as possible to make it as easy as I can for the folks who are dissecting me. As far as motivations to become healthier go, it might be kind of odd, but the end result is all the same.
posted by ChuraChura at 6:33 AM on September 11, 2014 [5 favorites]


I filled out all the forms to donate my remains to the body farm in Tennessee but figure out how to get them (me?) down there when the time comes. If you live more than 250 miles away, you are responsible for transport. I'm open to suggestion.
posted by lyssabee at 6:38 AM on September 11, 2014


I ... [can't] figure out how to get them (me?) down there when the time comes. If you live more than 250 miles away, you are responsible for transport. I'm open to suggestion.

You should be able to contract with your local funeral home to make arrangements for this and even pay for it ahead of time.
posted by Jahaza at 7:24 AM on September 11, 2014 [2 favorites]


I absolutely love the idea of my dead body being left out in the woods for wolves and other critters to dispose of. I don't love the idea of somebody's dog bringing home my forearm as a treat and causing a ruckus.

I guess what it comes down to is, "please take my body so far out into the wilderness that no human or pet will ever find it."

I don't really want to be studied and prodded by anything except maggots and beaks.
posted by RedEmma at 8:46 AM on September 11, 2014


Forensic Anthropology Research Facility

That acronym is so close to BARF


Biological Anthropology Research Facility

I wonder how much data they share with the other body farms. I would guess there's a fair amount of attention paid to each others publications, this being a small field. Small enough that most body farms (including San Marcos, as is noted) have been founded by former students of Bill Bass, who started the first body farm at UT-Knoxville. Still, I wonder about just raw data on decomp, given the stark differences in fauna and humidity.
posted by Panjandrum at 3:22 PM on September 11, 2014


My (estranged for an unknown reason) sister is a forensic anthropologist. She most recently was working on uncovering bodies at the Florida boys "school" where they discovered all the bodies of kids who had gone missing. I am too squeamish for the article, but I'm sure she'll dig it. No pun intended.

That said, I would be totally ok with being eaten by wolves and vultures. I just don't want to be filled with chemicals and stuck in an airtight box under ground. That creeps me right the hell out.
posted by dejah420 at 3:25 PM on September 11, 2014


I also have submitted to be utilized post-mortem by a medical school with the same caveat as Beagle above: they might not have room. Which might be good because my other plan to have a dance floor installed on top of my grave seemed more amusing, if less socially helpful. Although some will enjoy it and it may have therapeutic benefits for them..
posted by umberto at 3:54 PM on September 11, 2014


As in, right up to where the shade line is, less than a quarter inch, so you have these half eaten, half mummified corpses lying half under a tree, half in the sun.

But shadows move ALL THE TIME following the sun? How does that work?
posted by glasseyes at 5:22 PM on September 11, 2014


I'm thinking I'd like to be cremated and have someone dump my ashes from the middle of the Golden Gate Bridge. It would have the cool of jumping without the whole missing the rest of your life part.
posted by localroger at 7:51 PM on September 11, 2014


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