No Simpsons Quotes, eh?
October 10, 2014 1:25 PM   Subscribe

From Uproxx:

" 'Hey guys. Hey, hey guys. Yes you. You guys right there. I like this group. I like all of you too. But can we cut it out with the quotes already? I like the discussion posts, related news links, original contributions, etcetera, but this group is BLOWING UP MY NEWSFEED! Half the time when I’m scrolling through my posts, the first twenty will be composed of five friend statuses, one ad, four original posts from here, and ten quotes from here.

" 'Look, I love the Simpsons. You know I do, and I know you do too, but sometimes I need my space. I don’t want to do something as drastic as unsubscribing from notifications, because I don’t want to break up; I want to work through this together. We all love classic Simpsons, but we’ve seen it. It’s hilarious. I see at LEAST five things every day that remind me of a Simpsons quote, and sometimes my friends have to tell me to knock it off with the quotes already. Please, guys: Babies love balls, but stop adding more balls (the balls are a metaphor).'

"That’s when the magic happened."

via Dead Homer Society...
posted by bitteroldman (50 comments total) 4 users marked this as a favorite
 
It gets annoying, know what I mean? Wink, wink, nudge, nudge...
posted by randomkeystrike at 1:30 PM on October 10, 2014 [6 favorites]


Here, let me finish the thread for you.
posted by blue_beetle at 1:37 PM on October 10, 2014 [2 favorites]


And let's say that she decides to ditch the Simpsons site for something more soothing...the Cat Stevens page on Facebook, say. And she sees that Cat Stevens has just posted this.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 1:37 PM on October 10, 2014 [3 favorites]


I kind of feel for the guy. I doubt that I'm alone in having one or two people in my Facebook or Tumblr feed that account for 50% or more of the posts. (One nice thing that I've noticed on FB recently is that you can block all reposts from a particular source, so that I don't have to unfriend the particular relative who reposts everything from people who themselves are very prolific posters.)
posted by Halloween Jack at 1:39 PM on October 10, 2014 [3 favorites]


In before torrent of quotes to say: what the hell was this person expecting to happen
posted by showbiz_liz at 1:39 PM on October 10, 2014 [1 favorite]


Probably not the Spanish Inquisition
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 1:40 PM on October 10, 2014 [17 favorites]


Like, constant pop culture quoting in casual conversation drives me up the fucking wall, I cannot stand it and it makes me think the over-quoter has no capacity to generate original thoughts, but this was in a Simpsons fan group! That's like the one place it's acceptable!
posted by showbiz_liz at 1:41 PM on October 10, 2014 [2 favorites]


"Stupid babies people need the most attention!"
posted by Fizz at 1:41 PM on October 10, 2014


All I can be is myself.
posted by obscure simpsons reference at 1:41 PM on October 10, 2014 [11 favorites]


All I can be is myself.

You d'oh you.
posted by Celsius1414 at 1:43 PM on October 10, 2014 [1 favorite]




1 / "best of the web"
 
posted by Herodios at 1:58 PM on October 10, 2014 [1 favorite]


Posting a Simpsons quote? Oh you better believe that's a paddlin'.
posted by Saxon Kane at 2:09 PM on October 10, 2014 [4 favorites]


I find most people cannot do ten Simpsons quotes by heart, unless they are actual fans of the show, who are rarer and rarer these days. This link made my day.

Then again, me and my four close friends randomly post the most obscure Simpsons trivia on each other's Facebook walls, probably the only part of my Facebook wall that is worth anything.

The latest few:

--

What kind of pie does Jasper pick up once he comes out of a frozen stupor in Apu's mart? What line does he say after that?
"________ pie. ____________________"

What is the name of Kurt Van Houten's first demo mix tape? Can I borrow a _____________ ? EGF CB

NR "I don't recall saying good luck"
13 July at 18:31 · Like · 2

AM "Yeah, my divorce was tough for my son too."- Jimbo
13 July at 23:25 · Unlike · 1

NR "But he turned out alright"
14 July at 08:54 · Like

EGF "Yeah, my divorce was tough for my son too."- Jimbo. Its Kearney i think who says this
14 July at 09:24 · Unlike · 1

EGF COULD YOU SEND
ME A JAR OF LOVE

AM Lol, have you heard of the "jerk homer" theory? Apparently, as the seasons go on, he suffers more and more brain damage and becomes more of a jerk.

Otto: they call them fingers, but I never see them fing!

What is Principal Skinner's real name and where did he grow up? AM CB First time I'd seen this episiode. Mind. Blown. Up.

What kind of pet shop is filled with rambunctious yahoos and hot jazz music at one in the morning?!
the uhhh best damn pet shop in town!

--

this is a major source of humor and enjoyment in my life

As for notifications flooding FB, I have the Facebook Purity "News Feed Eradicator" Chrome extension, which compresses your entire news feed down into an inspirational quote. Today's pick comes from Winston Churchill:

“We are still masters of our fate. We are still captains of our souls.”

~ Winston Churchill

My Google Chrome nanny extension also shuts down any Facebook tab automatically if I open anything under the domain facebook.com. My friend once called it "wastebook", and that description has stuck in my mind ever since.

TGIF
posted by niphates at 2:11 PM on October 10, 2014 [2 favorites]


"I find most people cannot do ten Simpsons quotes by heart"

I would love to hear more about your research methods.
posted by robcorr at 2:22 PM on October 10, 2014 [10 favorites]


What kind of pie does Jasper pick up once he comes out of a frozen stupor in Apu's mart? What line does he say after that?
"________ pie. ____________________"

What is the name of Kurt Van Houten's first demo mix tape? Can I borrow a _____________ ? EGF CB


The answer (without Googling) is "Moon pie. What a time to be alive" and "Can I borrow a feeling" to which Homer finds utterly hysterical.
posted by Talez at 2:25 PM on October 10, 2014 [3 favorites]


It's "What an age we live in..."

"I find most people cannot do ten Simpsons quotes by heart"

I would love to hear more about your research methods.

If you watch them enough (enough episodes) you remember, and if you have a close circle of friends who remember them easily, it sort of builds up over time.

I have been watching Simpsons episodes semi-consistently over dinner every night since about 2009 or so, and I only have a limited tract which I continually run over.

Kind of like reciting and memorizing poetry...

"Of Man's First Disobedience, and the fruit of that forbidden tree/
Whose mortal taste first brought Death in the world, and all our woe/
With loss of Eden. Till one greater man restore us, and regain the blissful Seat.
Sing, Oh Heavenly Muse..." etc. etc. etfc.
posted by niphates at 2:31 PM on October 10, 2014


yo I think they accidentally cut off the punchline or something
posted by DoctorFedora at 2:56 PM on October 10, 2014


Maybe it changed in syndication? Because I swear it was "what a time to be alive" and just googling that phrase gives me the episode capsule that appears to confirm it.
posted by Talez at 2:57 PM on October 10, 2014 [1 favorite]


The googles, they do nothing!
posted by robocop is bleeding at 3:01 PM on October 10, 2014 [8 favorites]


My Google Chrome nanny extension also shuts down any Facebook tab automatically if I open anything under the domain facebook.com. My friend once called it "wastebook", and that description has stuck in my mind ever since.

But I like to call it "Lost Wages"

my obscure animated series references will drive yours into the sun
posted by Fezboy! at 3:02 PM on October 10, 2014 [5 favorites]


Checked the dvds. It's "what a time to be alive". Sorry niphates.
posted by infinitelives at 3:03 PM on October 10, 2014 [1 favorite]




May the Force be with Spock on the Battlestar Firefly
posted by Sticherbeast at 3:06 PM on October 10, 2014 [1 favorite]




This is way preferable to the Achewood group that I unfollowed because of the constant flood of depressed Roast Beef types that become 40% of my feed somehow.
posted by Lentrohamsanin at 3:13 PM on October 10, 2014 [3 favorites]


First mix tape? Jesus.
posted by rhizome at 3:18 PM on October 10, 2014 [2 favorites]


Aha! I knew it!

The Simpsons is not actually a cartoon, it's a visual mnemonic for burning a set of trite phrases into the human brain!

You people are going to be sorry when you're in the home and your favorite grandchild tells you they love you, and the only thing you can do is quote Marge or Homer at them and call them Bart, but by then it will be far, far too late.
posted by jamjam at 3:21 PM on October 10, 2014 [2 favorites]


Checked the dvds. It's "what a time to be alive". Sorry niphates.

Boy, I really hope niphates got fired for that blunder.
posted by Atom Eyes at 3:25 PM on October 10, 2014 [2 favorites]


Lentrohamsanin: Oh man, that Achewood FB group. There was a golden moment for about 6 months when it was amazing. Then the Roast Beef types came in. Now it's turned into some kind of full-fledged community, and they had their own convention (!) earlier this year. Crazy.
posted by zsazsa at 3:26 PM on October 10, 2014 [2 favorites]


There are actually several Facebook Achewood splinter groups. One of them is for actually discussing the comic.
posted by A Bad Catholic at 3:36 PM on October 10, 2014


Boy, I really hope niphates got fired for that blunder.

Let me ask you a question. Why would a man who lives in Portland spend all of his time watching a show on FOX?
posted by Talez at 3:40 PM on October 10, 2014


Can't sleep, balls'll eat me.

wait that didn't work
posted by Ray Walston, Luck Dragon at 3:52 PM on October 10, 2014 [1 favorite]


This is yet another of the reasons that Facebook is so so broken.

The person complaining has no dial to say, "Turn the Simpsons page down a bit". Or "I want to see this page once a day".

There's no way for them to go to a metapage where you see your friends sorted by number of posts this week, most recent post, or date you friended them.

Indeed, there's no practical way to order your friends at all - or to order your posts. You get exactly one thing - a stream of posts in an order that Facebook opaquely chooses for you, and that you have little ability to change.

Now, I'd generally not complain - writing programs is time-consuming. But Facebook has gotten umpteen billion dollars poured into it, and where did all the money go? Certainly not into creating useful new features for its users!
posted by lupus_yonderboy at 3:56 PM on October 10, 2014 [5 favorites]


I'm in that Facebook group, and some of the quotes I posted in the thread made it to the Buzzfeed article.

Mock our quote based society all you like, but for the 36 odd hours the thread was active it was really something awesome. Some people were too harsh on her, but for the most part it was gentle ribbing delivered via the repurposing of almost every great Simpsons moment you can think of. It's definitely provided a ton of laughter over the last few days.

The Buzzfeed article leaves out the 2am celebrations upon reaching the 1000th comment, I was proud of the Al Gore screencap I posted at that point.

I will say that with the groups viral explosion in popularity now there actually ARE way too many quotes in my newsfeed. D'oh.
posted by yellowbinder at 3:59 PM on October 10, 2014 [1 favorite]


May I recommend FYSpringfield, a cornucopia of Simpsons screencaps, static and GIF, with easily avoidable words if you ignore the bottom of half the images... The site is actually a spin-off from FYNewNewYork, which did much the same for Futurama and still does, just less often.
posted by oneswellfoop at 4:24 PM on October 10, 2014 [3 favorites]


...the only thing you can do is quote Marge or Homer at them and call them Bart, but by then it will be far, far too late.

To borrow an idea from Jasper Carrot, for us it will feel right on time.
posted by StephenF at 4:37 PM on October 10, 2014


Let me ask you a question. Why would a man who lives in Portland spend all of his time watching a show on FOX?

I withdraw my question.
*bites candy bar*
posted by Atom Eyes at 5:09 PM on October 10, 2014


HAHAHA I CANT GET ENOUGH OF THAT GEORGE TAKEI!!!
posted by batfish at 5:42 PM on October 10, 2014 [1 favorite]


The person complaining has no dial to say, "Turn the Simpsons page down a bit". Or "I want to see this page once a day".

Facebook has exactly this, in the upper right corner of each post on your feed.
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 6:25 PM on October 10, 2014


But I like to call it "Lost Wages"

Niiice!

"I think my body is rejecting the claws"
"Well, cut it out"

posted by lkc at 6:40 PM on October 10, 2014 [1 favorite]


No Simpsons and No Beer Make Cookiebastard Something Something...
posted by Cookiebastard at 6:52 PM on October 10, 2014


Rest assured I was on the Internet within minutes registering my disgust throughout the world.
posted by Metroid Baby at 7:15 PM on October 10, 2014 [3 favorites]


I follow @SimpsonsQOTD for my daily fix. Actually it's multiple times a day. Seasons 1-11 only.
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 7:22 PM on October 10, 2014 [1 favorite]


Y'all have got to read or see Anne Washburn's play, "Mr Burns: A Post Electric Play". It's about people recreating The Simpsons after the breakdown of civilization. It's brilliant. A review from the NYTimes.
posted by stray at 9:38 PM on October 10, 2014 [3 favorites]


I follow @SimpsonsQOTD for my daily fix

Dammit i fell down the rabbit hole and have been googling dingamagoo for like 20 minutes with no answers.
posted by Hoopo at 10:35 PM on October 10, 2014


There'so no justice like angry mob justice.
posted by furtive at 7:42 AM on October 11, 2014


But I like to call it "Lost Wages"

I thought this was a Leisure Suit Larry reference.
Was I wrong?

(If nothing else, I learnt how to spell prophylactic!)
posted by Mezentian at 8:16 AM on October 11, 2014


Ah, Leisure Suit Larry. I still remember a scene, I think fairly early in the game, where Larry is wandering around in some seedy joint while a porno plays on an old TV screen. He overhears the wonderful bit of dialogue, "Hurts so good! Pull it out a little deeper!" I used to say that one whenever I wanted to creep out my ex.

Perhaps that is why she is my ex.

But I like to call it "Lost Wages"

Niiice!


I believe lkc is referencing the great Frisky Dingo, Adam Reed & Matt Thompson's pre-Archer series on [adult swim]. One character, Arthur Watley (aka The Dread Lobster) keeps making that lame joke, but Xander Crews (aka Awesome X) never tires of it, responding every time with "Niiice!" -- although there's also a little half-laugh in there that's hard to represent typographically -- perhaps "Nii'iice!" ?
posted by Saxon Kane at 10:36 AM on October 11, 2014 [2 favorites]


I find most people cannot do ten Simpsons quotes by heart, unless they are actual fans of the show

You're on.

- I Choo Choo Choo-se You
- Making bacon on the beach
- I was saying "Boooooooo-urns"
- You don't make friends with salad
- Stupid sexy Flanders!
- Can I Borrow a Feeling?
- Dental plan
- So I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time
- I see you've played Knifey-Spooney before
- Won't someone please think of the children?
- As god as my witness, I thought turkeys could fly
posted by mrgrimm at 9:21 PM on October 12, 2014


Sure I'm flattered, maybe even a little curious...
posted by Saxon Kane at 9:25 AM on October 13, 2014 [2 favorites]


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