Why I Bought Four Syrian Children Off a Beirut Street
March 25, 2016 8:29 AM Subscribe
In Counterpunch, Franklin Lamb, an American academic living in Lebanon writes about his personal experiences with human trafficking of Syrian refugees
Lebanon investigates whether Syrian children are being sold.
Others think this is a ridiculous journalistic stunt from Americans with a savior complex.
More articles by Franklin Lamb.
Lebanon investigates whether Syrian children are being sold.
Others think this is a ridiculous journalistic stunt from Americans with a savior complex.
More articles by Franklin Lamb.
This post was deleted for the following reason: Poster's Request -- frimble
That is a real toughie. I'm not sure what I would do if I were literally faced with a group of children in this manner, even though I tend to think that Ibn Zayd has the right of it. But it seems like there's something a bit different when it's a specific child right in front of you rather than some kind of "oh, let's all go to Lebanon and 'rescue' children, heedless of the complexities and consequences".
It's one of those things where I feel like there's two different philosophical things in play:
"I know that when you consider the aggregate group of children, it is more destructive than beneficial to 'rescue' children, and therefore I am not going to respond to these terrible problems by seeking out individual children to 'rescue', and I am not going to advocate for or support policies that focus on adoption or rehoming."
"There is literally a kid in front of me and I have some reason to believe that this individual kid is going to face immediate bad consequences if I don't 'rescue' them, even knowing that 'rescue' is merely the least-bad option."
I mean, there are all kinds of things where in the aggregate I don't support policies that [do X] but sometimes when faced with an individual person I make a decision to [do X] based on the specific case. Like, I really don't support calling the cops; but I have encountered a couple of life situations where I judged calling the cops to be the least-bad option for the people immediately involved.
The questions I would have for this guy, though:
1. Did you have reason to believe that immediate harm was in the offing? Or was this mostly about your feelings? He asserts immediate harm, but I don't know enough about the situation to assess, because white people in foreign places often strongly assert immediate harm.
2. What steps is he going to take to minimize the cultural displacement? He has some internet fame; can he work to get them placed in a more culturally-appropriate situation rather than just sent to some random family?
3. Using what attention he commands, can he advocate for policies that are better than this and that help kids in the aggregate, or is this just going to be a stunt? "I took these kids in because it was an emergency, but we need policies, not random well-meaning white people" is a reasonable position to take. I am a little worried with this kind of piece that no matter what it says, it none the less gives the impression that what should happen is this kind of dramatic individual thing.
posted by Frowner at 9:09 AM on March 25, 2016 [9 favorites]
It's one of those things where I feel like there's two different philosophical things in play:
"I know that when you consider the aggregate group of children, it is more destructive than beneficial to 'rescue' children, and therefore I am not going to respond to these terrible problems by seeking out individual children to 'rescue', and I am not going to advocate for or support policies that focus on adoption or rehoming."
"There is literally a kid in front of me and I have some reason to believe that this individual kid is going to face immediate bad consequences if I don't 'rescue' them, even knowing that 'rescue' is merely the least-bad option."
I mean, there are all kinds of things where in the aggregate I don't support policies that [do X] but sometimes when faced with an individual person I make a decision to [do X] based on the specific case. Like, I really don't support calling the cops; but I have encountered a couple of life situations where I judged calling the cops to be the least-bad option for the people immediately involved.
The questions I would have for this guy, though:
1. Did you have reason to believe that immediate harm was in the offing? Or was this mostly about your feelings? He asserts immediate harm, but I don't know enough about the situation to assess, because white people in foreign places often strongly assert immediate harm.
2. What steps is he going to take to minimize the cultural displacement? He has some internet fame; can he work to get them placed in a more culturally-appropriate situation rather than just sent to some random family?
3. Using what attention he commands, can he advocate for policies that are better than this and that help kids in the aggregate, or is this just going to be a stunt? "I took these kids in because it was an emergency, but we need policies, not random well-meaning white people" is a reasonable position to take. I am a little worried with this kind of piece that no matter what it says, it none the less gives the impression that what should happen is this kind of dramatic individual thing.
posted by Frowner at 9:09 AM on March 25, 2016 [9 favorites]
Having traveled in parts of the world where things were for sale that really should not be for sale, I empathize with the author's immediate gut reaction. It's a hard one to overcome and philosophy or geopolitical policy and just rationality in general kind of flies out the window when you're standing right there. I also think that most of the concerns are very valid ones. Sometimes there's not a right answer, just a dizzying series of more and less terrible ones.
posted by soren_lorensen at 9:13 AM on March 25, 2016 [8 favorites]
posted by soren_lorensen at 9:13 AM on March 25, 2016 [8 favorites]
My little cousin disappeared after the last Gaza devastation. She was last seen trying to cross into Egypt, and we've had no luck finding her since. Were I in Lebanon, and faced with this same choice, I too would have "purchased" these children, with the assumption, that as an American with a ridiculous sense of entitlement, I could get something better for them than what might otherwise happen.
I have volunteered to take entire Syrian families, and I have also volunteered to take as many as five of the central and south American kids being detained at north American borders. What is happening to children across the world as a direct result of how the US government spends my tax dollars is criminal.
posted by SecretAgentSockpuppet at 9:33 AM on March 25, 2016 [50 favorites]
I have volunteered to take entire Syrian families, and I have also volunteered to take as many as five of the central and south American kids being detained at north American borders. What is happening to children across the world as a direct result of how the US government spends my tax dollars is criminal.
posted by SecretAgentSockpuppet at 9:33 AM on March 25, 2016 [50 favorites]
I wish there were less florid language, the guy makes me uneasy with "sweetheart" and "darling" though that may just be his style. And in the long run, it might call enough attention to the situation to make a difference for these and other victims.
But it would have been much, much better had he brought someone in who spoke their language to interview them about what they knew. I have to think the oldest, especially, is traumatized and in a self-protective mode, and the little ones simply confused and adrift. It would be responsible to interview them, try to find out what did happen, where they came from, who their family might be.
Maybe all that happened, but he didn't mention it. And that makes me uncomfortable.
posted by emjaybee at 9:39 AM on March 25, 2016 [7 favorites]
But it would have been much, much better had he brought someone in who spoke their language to interview them about what they knew. I have to think the oldest, especially, is traumatized and in a self-protective mode, and the little ones simply confused and adrift. It would be responsible to interview them, try to find out what did happen, where they came from, who their family might be.
Maybe all that happened, but he didn't mention it. And that makes me uncomfortable.
posted by emjaybee at 9:39 AM on March 25, 2016 [7 favorites]
Yeah, it's pretty weird that he describes in detail the (so-American) food he is feeding them, but doesn't mention if he's asked them what their understanding of the situation is and, if so, what they said. Eight is old enough to have a pretty good idea of what is going on.
posted by snorkmaiden at 9:42 AM on March 25, 2016
posted by snorkmaiden at 9:42 AM on March 25, 2016
Yuck. I could forgive the cringe-worthy language about precious beauties, darlings and angels and the junk food sensibilities of their "American Uncle" if he told us more about what he's doing to help these kids overcome whatever trauma they've endured and find them a permanent home. The whole piece strikes me as mostly humblebrag about himself. Sure these kids may well be safer, and that's a good thing, but they're still being exploited in the service of his narrative about himself.
posted by carmicha at 9:49 AM on March 25, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by carmicha at 9:49 AM on March 25, 2016 [4 favorites]
I feel like there's this genre of tough-guy sentimentality that you find a lot in certain kinds of left journalism by men, and it feels weird and button-pushy to me. I can't quite put my finger on the exact aspect of the language, but it's sort of this attempt to seem really street-wise and cynical while also showing that one still has a feeling heart.
But on the other hand, I've known people who had very politically right-on writing styles who were actually terrible humans.
posted by Frowner at 10:41 AM on March 25, 2016 [2 favorites]
But on the other hand, I've known people who had very politically right-on writing styles who were actually terrible humans.
posted by Frowner at 10:41 AM on March 25, 2016 [2 favorites]
Yuck. I could forgive the cringe-worthy language about precious beauties, darlings and angels and the junk food sensibilities of their "American Uncle" if he told us more about what he's doing to help these kids overcome whatever trauma they've endured and find them a permanent home.
I think yours is a very rational point of view, but as a person who has worked with refugees, trafficking victims, etc. for several years, I am not sure you have a realistic expectations of what a person unfamiliar with social work can and cannot do when they run into a situation like this one.
Those children may or may not end up in an ideal setting (and I really hope they do), but sometimes it's the little things that count. In my experience, American culture is something refugee children idealize, and American food (except for peanut butter, which they tend to hate for some reason), could be the way to let them just not think about the hardship and have at least a short episode of happiness in an otherwise terrible situation.
What's more, getting an interpreter and interviewing a 12 year old without a professional counselor could re-traumatize that child.
Saying things like "darling", "angels", etc. seems to me like an attempt to cope with the emotion of seeing vulnerable, scared little children being sold in the street. That itself is traumatizing for the grown up on the other side of the transaction.
This man found himself in a horrible situation and he did what he could to help. He may not have acted as an experienced refugee caseworker, but these children were lucky and chances are they will be very grateful. The perfect is the enemy of the good. Neither I nor any of my coworkers would ever fault this man for actually giving a shit and doing something about it. At least he has improved their chances.
posted by Tarumba at 11:08 AM on March 25, 2016 [35 favorites]
I think yours is a very rational point of view, but as a person who has worked with refugees, trafficking victims, etc. for several years, I am not sure you have a realistic expectations of what a person unfamiliar with social work can and cannot do when they run into a situation like this one.
Those children may or may not end up in an ideal setting (and I really hope they do), but sometimes it's the little things that count. In my experience, American culture is something refugee children idealize, and American food (except for peanut butter, which they tend to hate for some reason), could be the way to let them just not think about the hardship and have at least a short episode of happiness in an otherwise terrible situation.
What's more, getting an interpreter and interviewing a 12 year old without a professional counselor could re-traumatize that child.
Saying things like "darling", "angels", etc. seems to me like an attempt to cope with the emotion of seeing vulnerable, scared little children being sold in the street. That itself is traumatizing for the grown up on the other side of the transaction.
This man found himself in a horrible situation and he did what he could to help. He may not have acted as an experienced refugee caseworker, but these children were lucky and chances are they will be very grateful. The perfect is the enemy of the good. Neither I nor any of my coworkers would ever fault this man for actually giving a shit and doing something about it. At least he has improved their chances.
posted by Tarumba at 11:08 AM on March 25, 2016 [35 favorites]
The suffering of abandonment on a street corner, vs. the suffering of "cultural displacement," "so-American" food, and being referred to as "sweetheart": teach the controversy!
posted by RogerB at 11:16 AM on March 25, 2016 [6 favorites]
posted by RogerB at 11:16 AM on March 25, 2016 [6 favorites]
"and American food (except for peanut butter, which they tend to hate for some reason"
Tangent: One of my favorite shows on WCBN back in the day was "Pandora's Lunchbox," which was basically a couple of radio hosts trying food from around the world. The flat-out funniest one was when the Turkish host tried peanut butter and was apoplectic about "How can people even eat this? Oh my god my mouth is so gummed up!" and then made smacking noises for like five minutes. It was like listening to Americans try natto for the first time.
posted by klangklangston at 11:17 AM on March 25, 2016 [7 favorites]
Tangent: One of my favorite shows on WCBN back in the day was "Pandora's Lunchbox," which was basically a couple of radio hosts trying food from around the world. The flat-out funniest one was when the Turkish host tried peanut butter and was apoplectic about "How can people even eat this? Oh my god my mouth is so gummed up!" and then made smacking noises for like five minutes. It was like listening to Americans try natto for the first time.
posted by klangklangston at 11:17 AM on March 25, 2016 [7 favorites]
The man doesn't claim to be a social worker and I'm sure there's a list of policies that they would follow in this situation that he doesn't know anything about. He's just a guy who came across a terrible situation and tried to help. And thank god for those kids he did. Where they are now has to be better than the streets.
posted by Jubey at 1:42 PM on March 25, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by Jubey at 1:42 PM on March 25, 2016 [2 favorites]
There's a dutch non-profit group who's goal is "to take the war out of the children" when "the children have been taken out of the war". Both are hard problems. Don't stop after having achieved the "take children out of war" step...
posted by DreamerFi at 2:05 PM on March 25, 2016
posted by DreamerFi at 2:05 PM on March 25, 2016
If this dude truly is taking care of four Syrian orphans, I believe he is entitled to humble-brag and call them darlings as much as he wants to.
posted by foobaz at 4:25 PM on March 25, 2016 [6 favorites]
posted by foobaz at 4:25 PM on March 25, 2016 [6 favorites]
Did you have reason to believe that immediate harm was in the offing? Or was this mostly about your feelings? He asserts immediate harm, but I don't know enough about the situation to assess, because white people in foreign places often strongly assert immediate harm.
I lived in Beirut for a while, some years ago, and spent considerable time there for a number of years. I have some friends on the fringes of the Beirut sex industry, which is large and subject to a great degree of unofficial tolerance. Lamb wasn't wrong to associate that part of the Corniche with pimping and sex work, and while I don't know anything about trafficking of children that young in that area, sexual exploitation of older children definitely goes on.
As to whether he did the right thing? Much more difficult. Refugee and other children begging and working on the street, often under the direction of human traffickers, is not something new. It was there before the Syrian war, and, without drastic change to the situation in Lebanon generally, will be there after the war is done with. Would he have been better giving the money to an NGO? Quite possibly. Buying kids in the street isn't the solution to this. But, of course, it's not easy to know what to do when you look at a child and fear for them. I think I wish he hadn't written about it, though. I don't think that helps get us closer to a resolution, and probably the opposite, in many ways.
posted by howfar at 8:24 PM on March 25, 2016 [1 favorite]
I lived in Beirut for a while, some years ago, and spent considerable time there for a number of years. I have some friends on the fringes of the Beirut sex industry, which is large and subject to a great degree of unofficial tolerance. Lamb wasn't wrong to associate that part of the Corniche with pimping and sex work, and while I don't know anything about trafficking of children that young in that area, sexual exploitation of older children definitely goes on.
As to whether he did the right thing? Much more difficult. Refugee and other children begging and working on the street, often under the direction of human traffickers, is not something new. It was there before the Syrian war, and, without drastic change to the situation in Lebanon generally, will be there after the war is done with. Would he have been better giving the money to an NGO? Quite possibly. Buying kids in the street isn't the solution to this. But, of course, it's not easy to know what to do when you look at a child and fear for them. I think I wish he hadn't written about it, though. I don't think that helps get us closer to a resolution, and probably the opposite, in many ways.
posted by howfar at 8:24 PM on March 25, 2016 [1 favorite]
That is a real toughie. I'm not sure what I would do if I were literally faced with a group of children in this manner,
I'd take 'em home too, no doubt. It may be the wrong thing to do in theory but I couldn't live with myself if I left them to be sold to a pimp or pedophile. Who knows if their parents are even dead, they might be frantically searching for them or other relatives might be. I'd probably have to ask my friends for help like this guy did. But I'd keep them safe.
Also I'd discreetly go to the health workers and whatever the local equivalent of nuns are that move amongst refugees and aren't too hung up on reporting you and carefully see if the family could be found. If you're reading dude, do that now.
posted by fshgrl at 9:23 PM on March 25, 2016
I'd take 'em home too, no doubt. It may be the wrong thing to do in theory but I couldn't live with myself if I left them to be sold to a pimp or pedophile. Who knows if their parents are even dead, they might be frantically searching for them or other relatives might be. I'd probably have to ask my friends for help like this guy did. But I'd keep them safe.
Also I'd discreetly go to the health workers and whatever the local equivalent of nuns are that move amongst refugees and aren't too hung up on reporting you and carefully see if the family could be found. If you're reading dude, do that now.
posted by fshgrl at 9:23 PM on March 25, 2016
Yeah, that woman was straight up selling them and would have sold all four to anyone or sold them one by one, and she and the kids would have vanished if he'd tried to get anyone else involved. This is the equivalent of walking past a burning building with kids inside. You get them out first.
Now though - he needs to document anything they remember and try to trace their family, get them paperwork and find some kind of longterm solution, and he sounds like he's working on that.
Big props to him for blurring the photograph and taking care to write about them with warmth. I hope he gets lots of resources to help him or finds someone to help him - four trafficked kids is hard!
The big answer isn't to set fire to places so you can rescue kids. It's to repair houses so the kids can live there safely.
But you don't walk past a burning house.
posted by dorothyisunderwood at 10:08 PM on March 25, 2016 [7 favorites]
Now though - he needs to document anything they remember and try to trace their family, get them paperwork and find some kind of longterm solution, and he sounds like he's working on that.
Big props to him for blurring the photograph and taking care to write about them with warmth. I hope he gets lots of resources to help him or finds someone to help him - four trafficked kids is hard!
The big answer isn't to set fire to places so you can rescue kids. It's to repair houses so the kids can live there safely.
But you don't walk past a burning house.
posted by dorothyisunderwood at 10:08 PM on March 25, 2016 [7 favorites]
What he did was wrong, and I can't imagine doing anything else were I to have been in his situation. What we, collectively, are all doing is very much worse, because we're tolerating if not causing the situation in the first place.
posted by Joe in Australia at 6:13 AM on March 26, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by Joe in Australia at 6:13 AM on March 26, 2016 [1 favorite]
Pretty much in the case of any story where your response is "He should have fed me more intimate details about the situation so that I may more properly judge him [and also get the good deets]" you have to stop and ask "are those details the private story of someone else that I am not entitled to and the author is not divulging for that reason?"
It is appropriate to write a story saying, "Here is what I saw, here is the general geo/political/legal situation of the thing I saw, this is what I did." It is probably necessary in this day and age to say, "And here is where I assure you of their general well-being now" but the details of what may have happened to them before, their medical treatment, their therapy, their legal status etc are private for a reason.
posted by Lyn Never at 1:09 PM on March 26, 2016 [2 favorites]
It is appropriate to write a story saying, "Here is what I saw, here is the general geo/political/legal situation of the thing I saw, this is what I did." It is probably necessary in this day and age to say, "And here is where I assure you of their general well-being now" but the details of what may have happened to them before, their medical treatment, their therapy, their legal status etc are private for a reason.
posted by Lyn Never at 1:09 PM on March 26, 2016 [2 favorites]
I hesitate to post this. This is very personal for me. I have a relative (gender redacted) who, on an urban street in the U.S., had a tiny time window in which to make this exact same terrifying/agonizing decision. My relative bought the kids, eventually adopted them, and things turned out mostly okay-ish. Or at least better than what was almost certainly going to happen a couple hours later without them acting. The consequences were huge--both to their family and to the kids, but still. Sense of imminent danger vs. chance for leisurely reflection. Hindsight is 20/20? I don't know. Faced with the same urgent choice, even knowing what transpired afterwards and the fact that I have not a single parental bone in my body, I would have emptied out my ATM, too.
posted by skye.dancer at 8:08 AM on March 27, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by skye.dancer at 8:08 AM on March 27, 2016 [5 favorites]
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