Beer for the maybe the most American summer ever.
May 10, 2016 9:45 AM Subscribe
"Nothing was more iconic than Budweiser and nothing was more iconic than America." Seeking to remind you of that fact, American-made proud anti-snob macro beer Budweiser, is issuing limited-edition cans that patriotically conflate its branding with America for the election season.
This post was deleted for the following reason: Poster's Request -- frimble
Is that really a good sales move? Have they seen this election season?
posted by Holy Zarquon's Singing Fish at 9:49 AM on May 10, 2016 [16 favorites]
posted by Holy Zarquon's Singing Fish at 9:49 AM on May 10, 2016 [16 favorites]
What could be more American than a giant corporation whose advertising mostly consists of crapping on small independent local businesses?
posted by beerperson at 9:51 AM on May 10, 2016 [19 favorites]
posted by beerperson at 9:51 AM on May 10, 2016 [19 favorites]
So I guess when InBev paid for all those precogs for their marketing department, someone slipped them an irony precog and they just didn't notice.
For Summer 2017 they'll officially call it Buttweiser: King of Rears like on those novelty shirts from the 1990s.
posted by griphus at 9:51 AM on May 10, 2016 [13 favorites]
For Summer 2017 they'll officially call it Buttweiser: King of Rears like on those novelty shirts from the 1990s.
posted by griphus at 9:51 AM on May 10, 2016 [13 favorites]
What could be more American than a giant corporation whose advertising mostly consists of crapping on small independent local businesses?
A foreign entity coming in, co-opting and killing local entities.
posted by Etrigan at 9:51 AM on May 10, 2016 [15 favorites]
A foreign entity coming in, co-opting and killing local entities.
posted by Etrigan at 9:51 AM on May 10, 2016 [15 favorites]
Shouldn't it say Belgian Multinational?
posted by saul wright at 9:52 AM on May 10, 2016 [31 favorites]
posted by saul wright at 9:52 AM on May 10, 2016 [31 favorites]
Cans? Pfft. I'm so patriotic I only drink beer out of hollowed-out Bald Eagles.
posted by Fuzzy Monster at 9:52 AM on May 10, 2016 [14 favorites]
posted by Fuzzy Monster at 9:52 AM on May 10, 2016 [14 favorites]
I only drink beer out of hollowed-out Bald Eagles.
Which end tho?
posted by griphus at 9:52 AM on May 10, 2016 [15 favorites]
Which end tho?
posted by griphus at 9:52 AM on May 10, 2016 [15 favorites]
Oh man, I was going to post this but then I figured it might be too thin. Glad I get to type about it anyway. It's just too how-is-this-not-the-Onion. The best part is the lyric from a communist song.
In addition to the aforementioned phrases, the word-heavy label would include, in all capital letters, the following: “Land of the Free,” “Home of the Brave” and “From the Redwood Forest to the Gulf Stream waters this land was made for you and me.”
posted by uncleozzy at 9:53 AM on May 10, 2016 [7 favorites]
In addition to the aforementioned phrases, the word-heavy label would include, in all capital letters, the following: “Land of the Free,” “Home of the Brave” and “From the Redwood Forest to the Gulf Stream waters this land was made for you and me.”
posted by uncleozzy at 9:53 AM on May 10, 2016 [7 favorites]
I only drink beer out of hollowed-out Bald Eagles.
Which end tho?
the most American end, obvs
posted by numaner at 9:53 AM on May 10, 2016 [7 favorites]
Which end tho?
the most American end, obvs
posted by numaner at 9:53 AM on May 10, 2016 [7 favorites]
Sipping the lager, I wonder if Trump would drink America.
Nope. Allegedly he is a teetotaler.
posted by beagle at 9:54 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
Nope. Allegedly he is a teetotaler.
posted by beagle at 9:54 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
It wouldn't even be Budweiser's worst foray into pseudo-politics-as-advertising this year.
posted by jedicus at 9:54 AM on May 10, 2016
posted by jedicus at 9:54 AM on May 10, 2016
Not content to be simply garbage, they've tried to reimage the brand as something exciting.
A garbage fire.
posted by Slackermagee at 9:54 AM on May 10, 2016 [17 favorites]
A garbage fire.
posted by Slackermagee at 9:54 AM on May 10, 2016 [17 favorites]
Also I'm a little upset they're not making America Light Lime.
posted by uncleozzy at 9:54 AM on May 10, 2016 [18 favorites]
posted by uncleozzy at 9:54 AM on May 10, 2016 [18 favorites]
As a formerly active alcoholic, I will say that it's relatively easy to drink an enormous number of cans of Budweiser, compared to your fancy hipster beers that taste like beer.
posted by thelonius at 9:55 AM on May 10, 2016 [11 favorites]
posted by thelonius at 9:55 AM on May 10, 2016 [11 favorites]
I wouldn't drink a Bud even if I had been through the desert on a horse with no name.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 9:55 AM on May 10, 2016 [8 favorites]
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 9:55 AM on May 10, 2016 [8 favorites]
“From the Redwood Forest to the Gulf Stream waters this land was made for you and me.”
Because "From the Czech Republic to Saint Louis to Belgium" sounded a bit awkward.
posted by neckro23 at 9:56 AM on May 10, 2016 [11 favorites]
Because "From the Czech Republic to Saint Louis to Belgium" sounded a bit awkward.
posted by neckro23 at 9:56 AM on May 10, 2016 [11 favorites]
If we can use it as currency to purchase other, tastier beers, fine.
posted by lefty lucky cat at 9:59 AM on May 10, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by lefty lucky cat at 9:59 AM on May 10, 2016 [3 favorites]
Oooooh man I have a Dad joke!
The warning label should read "Czechia self before you wreck yourself".
posted by selfnoise at 10:00 AM on May 10, 2016 [24 favorites]
The warning label should read "Czechia self before you wreck yourself".
posted by selfnoise at 10:00 AM on May 10, 2016 [24 favorites]
the word-heavy label would include, in all capital letters ... “From the Redwood Forest to the Gulf Stream waters this land was made for you and me.”
Woody Guthrie, huh? I wonder if that's a sneaky bit of anti-Trump messaging on the part of Anheuser Busch?
posted by Atom Eyes at 10:01 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
Woody Guthrie, huh? I wonder if that's a sneaky bit of anti-Trump messaging on the part of Anheuser Busch?
posted by Atom Eyes at 10:01 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
I prefer to drink Olde English 800 renamed "The Bronx."
posted by jonmc at 10:01 AM on May 10, 2016 [8 favorites]
posted by jonmc at 10:01 AM on May 10, 2016 [8 favorites]
Meanwhile, the oldest brewery in America isn't playing any shenanigans with their branding.
God damn I want a bottle of Lager right now.
posted by SansPoint at 10:02 AM on May 10, 2016 [9 favorites]
God damn I want a bottle of Lager right now.
posted by SansPoint at 10:02 AM on May 10, 2016 [9 favorites]
Election 2016: You don't own America, you just rent it.
posted by mcdoublewide at 10:04 AM on May 10, 2016 [34 favorites]
posted by mcdoublewide at 10:04 AM on May 10, 2016 [34 favorites]
That beer was never great.
posted by davebush at 10:05 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by davebush at 10:05 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
Butt geyser.
posted by resurrexit at 10:08 AM on May 10, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by resurrexit at 10:08 AM on May 10, 2016 [5 favorites]
Is that really a good sales move? Have they seen this election season?
They should steal the ideas behind Rege Cordic's Olde Frothingslosh, "the Pale Stale Ale—so light the foam is on the bottom”—and market it as a “a whale of an ale for the pale stale male.”
posted by octobersurprise at 10:09 AM on May 10, 2016 [8 favorites]
They should steal the ideas behind Rege Cordic's Olde Frothingslosh, "the Pale Stale Ale—so light the foam is on the bottom”—and market it as a “a whale of an ale for the pale stale male.”
posted by octobersurprise at 10:09 AM on May 10, 2016 [8 favorites]
From the regular packaging:
We know of no brand produced by any other brewer which costs so much to brew and age.
Hahahahahahahahahaha
posted by Huck500 at 10:10 AM on May 10, 2016 [7 favorites]
We know of no brand produced by any other brewer which costs so much to brew and age.
Hahahahahahahahahaha
posted by Huck500 at 10:10 AM on May 10, 2016 [7 favorites]
I was going to make a joke about how it's a product made mostly of corn and sells well despite being garbage, but this year has proven that we are through the looking glass so I'll just go back to crying softly in the corner.
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 10:11 AM on May 10, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 10:11 AM on May 10, 2016 [3 favorites]
Bud plans to speak with a contemporary voice that says, in a nutshell, that a brand can be big, and good.Hmm. "Contemporary".
What's great about this country is that America started the tradition where the richest consumers buy essentially the same things as the poorest. You can be watching TV and see Coca-Cola, and you know that the President drinks Coke, Liz Taylor drinks Coke, and just think, you can drink Coke, too. A Coke is a Coke and no amount of money can get you a better Coke than the one the bum on the corner is drinking. All the Cokes are the same and all the Cokes are good. Liz Taylor knows it, the President knows it, the bum knows it, and you know it.Andy Warhol, 1975
Good to see that advertising has its fingers on the pulse of contemporary culture.
posted by howfar at 10:13 AM on May 10, 2016 [11 favorites]
First: Budweiser is actually pretty good. I'm more of a High Life man myself, but I would rather take Budweiser than some flavor-of-the-month IPA that tastes like nail polish remover, especially when it's 90 degrees outside.
Second: Yeah, this branding is pretty dumb. But this is turning into a pretty dumb year, so...
posted by Cash4Lead at 10:13 AM on May 10, 2016 [3 favorites]
Second: Yeah, this branding is pretty dumb. But this is turning into a pretty dumb year, so...
posted by Cash4Lead at 10:13 AM on May 10, 2016 [3 favorites]
Stand tall for the beer called America.
Lay down like a naked dead body,
keep it real for the people workin' overtime,
they can't stay living off the governments dime.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 10:13 AM on May 10, 2016 [4 favorites]
Lay down like a naked dead body,
keep it real for the people workin' overtime,
they can't stay living off the governments dime.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 10:13 AM on May 10, 2016 [4 favorites]
'murca
posted by echocollate at 10:14 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by echocollate at 10:14 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
I live in America, and a good friend of mine was born in America?
Where do I live? Canada. Where was my friend born? El Salvador.
America isn't the name of any country... It's the shared name of two fucking continents.
While I will admit that this distinction isn't necessarily appreciated by the type of USA citizens that drink that swill, many of the citizens of the other 34 countries tend to get annoyed when USA citizens try to claim ownership of the word.
/pedant.
posted by el io at 10:14 AM on May 10, 2016 [13 favorites]
Where do I live? Canada. Where was my friend born? El Salvador.
America isn't the name of any country... It's the shared name of two fucking continents.
While I will admit that this distinction isn't necessarily appreciated by the type of USA citizens that drink that swill, many of the citizens of the other 34 countries tend to get annoyed when USA citizens try to claim ownership of the word.
/pedant.
posted by el io at 10:14 AM on May 10, 2016 [13 favorites]
well at least it isn't in celebration of our mandate to kill people a la Freedom Fries
posted by angrycat at 10:15 AM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by angrycat at 10:15 AM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
America isn't the name of any country ...
Thanks for introducing the only thing duller than Budweiser.
posted by octobersurprise at 10:16 AM on May 10, 2016 [72 favorites]
Thanks for introducing the only thing duller than Budweiser.
posted by octobersurprise at 10:16 AM on May 10, 2016 [72 favorites]
"We thought nothing was more iconic than Budweiser and nothing was more iconic than America"
Classical Greece excepted, I guess.
posted by AndrewInDC at 10:24 AM on May 10, 2016 [5 favorites]
Classical Greece excepted, I guess.
posted by AndrewInDC at 10:24 AM on May 10, 2016 [5 favorites]
And Orthodox Churches.
posted by howfar at 10:25 AM on May 10, 2016 [7 favorites]
posted by howfar at 10:25 AM on May 10, 2016 [7 favorites]
"We thought nothing was more iconic than Budweiser and nothing was more iconic than America," says Tosh Hall, creative director at the can’s branding firm JKR.
Since Anheuser-Busch no longer owns Schlitz, there was no need for anyone to mention them.
posted by Smart Dalek at 10:25 AM on May 10, 2016
Since Anheuser-Busch no longer owns Schlitz, there was no need for anyone to mention them.
posted by Smart Dalek at 10:25 AM on May 10, 2016
I was going to post this but then I figured it might be too thin.
I see what you did there.
posted by Flashman at 10:26 AM on May 10, 2016 [10 favorites]
I see what you did there.
posted by Flashman at 10:26 AM on May 10, 2016 [10 favorites]
I like how the country's iconicity is secondary to the beer's.
posted by rhizome at 10:35 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by rhizome at 10:35 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
many of the citizens of the other 34 countries tend to get annoyed when USA citizens try to claim ownership of the word.
No. We really don't.
posted by rocket88 at 10:35 AM on May 10, 2016 [10 favorites]
No. We really don't.
posted by rocket88 at 10:35 AM on May 10, 2016 [10 favorites]
I was going to make a joke about how it's a product made mostly of corn and sells well despite being garbage...
To be accurate, it's rice, not corn. And to be even more accurate, it's made mostly out of water.
posted by sixpack at 10:36 AM on May 10, 2016
To be accurate, it's rice, not corn. And to be even more accurate, it's made mostly out of water.
posted by sixpack at 10:36 AM on May 10, 2016
It's what plants crave.
posted by spilon at 10:40 AM on May 10, 2016 [7 favorites]
posted by spilon at 10:40 AM on May 10, 2016 [7 favorites]
Sure the big companies can market their junk beer all day long but the local micro breweries are thriving and people are finally able to get good beer easier than lets say 20 years ago.
posted by trusted at 10:45 AM on May 10, 2016
posted by trusted at 10:45 AM on May 10, 2016
thelonius: "As a formerly active alcoholic, I will say that it's relatively easy to drink an enormous number of cans of Budweiser, compared to your fancy hipster beers that taste like beer."
Fortunately, I only drink one or two at a time. If you're not consuming mass quantities, craft beer isn't all that expensive.
posted by octothorpe at 10:48 AM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
Fortunately, I only drink one or two at a time. If you're not consuming mass quantities, craft beer isn't all that expensive.
posted by octothorpe at 10:48 AM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
Just another example of PR trolling. Now you know about this. A PR guy just got his wings.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 10:52 AM on May 10, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 10:52 AM on May 10, 2016 [4 favorites]
entropicamericana's law: As a MeFi beer thread grows longer, the probability of someone coming in to bitch about IPAs approaches 1
posted by entropicamericana at 10:54 AM on May 10, 2016 [35 favorites]
posted by entropicamericana at 10:54 AM on May 10, 2016 [35 favorites]
People you are missing the key point. The cans are limited edition! They'll be collectables after the collapse.
posted by srboisvert at 10:56 AM on May 10, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by srboisvert at 10:56 AM on May 10, 2016 [3 favorites]
thelonius As a formerly active alcoholic, I will say that it's relatively easy to drink an enormous number of cans of Budweiser, compared to your fancy hipster beers that taste like beer.
Another point in favor of Yuengling Lager. Tastes _good_, and you can drink significant amounts of it.
posted by SansPoint at 10:57 AM on May 10, 2016 [3 favorites]
Another point in favor of Yuengling Lager. Tastes _good_, and you can drink significant amounts of it.
posted by SansPoint at 10:57 AM on May 10, 2016 [3 favorites]
srboisvert: They said the same about Billy Beer.
posted by SansPoint at 10:57 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by SansPoint at 10:57 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
Turns out Surly makes a #Merica "pre-Prohibition American lager," for those who feel the need for a protest beer.
posted by me3dia at 11:08 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by me3dia at 11:08 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
Mod note: Couple of comments deleted. Point noted that 'American' is also used in some contexts in a different way, to refer to residents of the two continents; let's not have a drawn-out rehash of the fight over that.
posted by LobsterMitten (staff) at 11:12 AM on May 10, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by LobsterMitten (staff) at 11:12 AM on May 10, 2016 [5 favorites]
In this era of hop bros and their double and triple IPAs, drinking watery macro lager is not unthinkable. So many bars in Seattle have all but one or two of their taps reserved for boutique hopsludge.
I wound up drinking a Corona the other day because the four other beers in the tub were all IPAs.
posted by Sauce Trough at 11:12 AM on May 10, 2016 [5 favorites]
I wound up drinking a Corona the other day because the four other beers in the tub were all IPAs.
posted by Sauce Trough at 11:12 AM on May 10, 2016 [5 favorites]
They'll be collectables after the collapse.
Surely they will constitute a currency in the aftertimes. "Gimme 5 Limes for an America," you'll say.
posted by rhizome at 11:16 AM on May 10, 2016 [5 favorites]
Surely they will constitute a currency in the aftertimes. "Gimme 5 Limes for an America," you'll say.
posted by rhizome at 11:16 AM on May 10, 2016 [5 favorites]
Look, if Fallout has taught me anything, it's to never throw away a bottlecap.
posted by Holy Zarquon's Singing Fish at 11:20 AM on May 10, 2016 [7 favorites]
posted by Holy Zarquon's Singing Fish at 11:20 AM on May 10, 2016 [7 favorites]
“Indivisible Since 1776.”
So presumably, the ATTTB will reject the proposed label based on false advertising?
posted by nickmark at 11:21 AM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
So presumably, the ATTTB will reject the proposed label based on false advertising?
posted by nickmark at 11:21 AM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
In this era of hop bros and their double and triple IPAs, drinking watery macro lager is not unthinkable.
It is indeed an act of rebellion! Pacifico over Corona, though.
posted by rhizome at 11:21 AM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
It is indeed an act of rebellion! Pacifico over Corona, though.
posted by rhizome at 11:21 AM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
needs more children with guns on the can also Jesus
posted by chococat at 11:23 AM on May 10, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by chococat at 11:23 AM on May 10, 2016 [4 favorites]
Listen, if I'm drinking watery lager, it's Schaefer every time. (Seriously: we did a double-blind taste test half a dozen years ago or so; you can just about make out that Schaefer finished 19 total points ahead of Schlitz).
posted by uncleozzy at 11:27 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by uncleozzy at 11:27 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
It's what beer drinkers drink when they're having more than six.
posted by uncleozzy at 11:32 AM on May 10, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by uncleozzy at 11:32 AM on May 10, 2016 [4 favorites]
Listen, if I'm drinking watery lager, it's Schaefer every time.
It's the beer to have when you're having more than one. My go-to hot weather brew that isn't PBR, High Life, or Schaefer is the Torch Pilsner.
posted by octobersurprise at 11:36 AM on May 10, 2016
It's the beer to have when you're having more than one. My go-to hot weather brew that isn't PBR, High Life, or Schaefer is the Torch Pilsner.
posted by octobersurprise at 11:36 AM on May 10, 2016
Unfortunately, Budweiser will forever be caught in the lacuna between mass appeal and "cool."
A "cool" rebranding could play up its accomplishments as an industrial product of amazing consistency, with Bauhaus-inspired design that stripped all ornamentation. I banged together a quick sketch; hit me up InBev!
posted by klangklangston at 11:40 AM on May 10, 2016 [5 favorites]
A "cool" rebranding could play up its accomplishments as an industrial product of amazing consistency, with Bauhaus-inspired design that stripped all ornamentation. I banged together a quick sketch; hit me up InBev!
posted by klangklangston at 11:40 AM on May 10, 2016 [5 favorites]
Unfortunately, instead of embracing cool, Bud has decided to go all-in on kitsch. I blame hipsters and Susan Sontag.
posted by klangklangston at 11:41 AM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by klangklangston at 11:41 AM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
I banged together a quick sketch ...
It's very Repo Man. Should be a big hit with thekids middle-agers.
posted by octobersurprise at 11:44 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
It's very Repo Man. Should be a big hit with the
posted by octobersurprise at 11:44 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
“Indivisible Since 1776.”
In addition to the whole "Civil War" thing, at best it's "Indivisible Since February 2, 1781 (December 16, 1777 if you really push it)"
posted by jedicus at 11:44 AM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
In addition to the whole "Civil War" thing, at best it's "Indivisible Since February 2, 1781 (December 16, 1777 if you really push it)"
posted by jedicus at 11:44 AM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
Did they not consider the inevitable fate of every beer?
Pissed out in the dugout. AMERICA! FUCK YEAH!
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 11:51 AM on May 10, 2016
Pissed out in the dugout. AMERICA! FUCK YEAH!
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 11:51 AM on May 10, 2016
America is, indeed, going down the toilet.
posted by uncleozzy at 11:52 AM on May 10, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by uncleozzy at 11:52 AM on May 10, 2016 [4 favorites]
the probability of someone coming in to bitch about IPAs approaches 1
Local brewers in Ontario have started calling the highly-hopped IPA style (e.g. IBUs over 35 or 40 or so), American-style Pale Ale or simply American Pale Ale, APAs.
posted by bonehead at 11:59 AM on May 10, 2016
Local brewers in Ontario have started calling the highly-hopped IPA style (e.g. IBUs over 35 or 40 or so), American-style Pale Ale or simply American Pale Ale, APAs.
posted by bonehead at 11:59 AM on May 10, 2016
Wait, if Budwesier is "the King of Beers"....didn't we fight a revolutionary war to get rid of having a king?
posted by wenestvedt at 12:04 PM on May 10, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by wenestvedt at 12:04 PM on May 10, 2016 [4 favorites]
Local brewers in Ontario have started calling the highly-hopped IPA style (e.g. IBUs over 35 or 40 or so), American-style Pale Ale or simply American Pale Ale, APAs.
American-Style Pale Ale is a beer style recognized by the Brewer's Association and has been since the 80s. An IPA (or American-Style IPA) has a IBU around 50-70 and slightly higher ABV and is a distinct thing from APA.
posted by beerperson at 12:04 PM on May 10, 2016 [4 favorites]
American-Style Pale Ale is a beer style recognized by the Brewer's Association and has been since the 80s. An IPA (or American-Style IPA) has a IBU around 50-70 and slightly higher ABV and is a distinct thing from APA.
posted by beerperson at 12:04 PM on May 10, 2016 [4 favorites]
didn't we fight a revolutionary war to get rid of having a king?
Well, except for the #1 King: a corpse named Jesus Christ, maybe you've heard of him.
posted by rhizome at 12:05 PM on May 10, 2016 [3 favorites]
Well, except for the #1 King: a corpse named Jesus Christ, maybe you've heard of him.
posted by rhizome at 12:05 PM on May 10, 2016 [3 favorites]
America: the President of Beers
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 12:05 PM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 12:05 PM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
(Needs moar James Lileks's "Cheap Beer Taste Test.")
posted by wenestvedt at 12:07 PM on May 10, 2016
posted by wenestvedt at 12:07 PM on May 10, 2016
Molson's can be Canada, and Tecate can be Mexico! There could be a whole United Nations of Beer!
posted by TedW at 12:11 PM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by TedW at 12:11 PM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
Wait, if Budwesier is "the King of Beers"....didn't we fight a revolutionary war to get rid of having a king?
Der Kaiser of Beers didn't test as well.
posted by entropicamericana at 12:12 PM on May 10, 2016 [4 favorites]
Der Kaiser of Beers didn't test as well.
posted by entropicamericana at 12:12 PM on May 10, 2016 [4 favorites]
In this era of hop bros and their double and triple IPAs, drinking watery macro lager is not unthinkable. So many bars in Seattle have all but one or two of their taps reserved for boutique hopsludge.
I wound up drinking a Corona the other day because the four other beers in the tub were all IPAs.
You might of missed it but the new buzzword of craft brewing is "balanced". Many of the breweries are aware that the craft brewing movement overshot the mark and are reeling it back in. I used to avoid IPAs because I'm no hophead but I have had several lately that were quite good. Just avoid drinking anything that sounds too brogasmic in its branding and you're probably safe.
posted by srboisvert at 12:20 PM on May 10, 2016 [5 favorites]
I wound up drinking a Corona the other day because the four other beers in the tub were all IPAs.
You might of missed it but the new buzzword of craft brewing is "balanced". Many of the breweries are aware that the craft brewing movement overshot the mark and are reeling it back in. I used to avoid IPAs because I'm no hophead but I have had several lately that were quite good. Just avoid drinking anything that sounds too brogasmic in its branding and you're probably safe.
posted by srboisvert at 12:20 PM on May 10, 2016 [5 favorites]
An IPA (or American-Style IPA) has a IBU around 50-70 and slightly higher ABV and is a distinct thing from APA.
So an IPA (British) is not an AIPA is not an APA (And for bonus points, not an International Pale Ale or an Australian Pale Ale either). Simple.
posted by bonehead at 12:20 PM on May 10, 2016
So an IPA (British) is not an AIPA is not an APA (And for bonus points, not an International Pale Ale or an Australian Pale Ale either). Simple.
posted by bonehead at 12:20 PM on May 10, 2016
Many of the breweries are aware that the craft brewing movement overshot the mark and are reeling it back in
I'm sort of a lapsed hophead, but I'm so, so, so incredibly on-board with the unfiltered, orange juice-style "East Coast" IPAs these days. Chewy and fruity and not just mouth-puckering bitter hops.
posted by uncleozzy at 12:25 PM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
I'm sort of a lapsed hophead, but I'm so, so, so incredibly on-board with the unfiltered, orange juice-style "East Coast" IPAs these days. Chewy and fruity and not just mouth-puckering bitter hops.
posted by uncleozzy at 12:25 PM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
Molson's can be Canada
Indeed, watching my fellow countrymen bitch about how tacky and American this is is somewhat hilarious.
posted by bonehead at 12:25 PM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
Indeed, watching my fellow countrymen bitch about how tacky and American this is is somewhat hilarious.
posted by bonehead at 12:25 PM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
Because "(Stool Scoots Out) 'What Are You Lookin' At....PUSSY!? I'll Go Right Here, Right Now! Yeah, You Better Walk Away'" wouldn't quite fit on the can
posted by Senor Cardgage at 12:31 PM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by Senor Cardgage at 12:31 PM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
So an IPA (British) is not an AIPA is not an APA (And for bonus points, not an International Pale Ale or an Australian Pale Ale either). Simple.
Yeah how dare people try to delineate varieties of things!
posted by beerperson at 12:32 PM on May 10, 2016
Yeah how dare people try to delineate varieties of things!
posted by beerperson at 12:32 PM on May 10, 2016
It's veering into EDM-territory of micro-distinctions, IMO. There will always be lumpers and splitters, but sometimes the taxonomists get into the weeds. It's worth having names to call things, but when the differences get too small and too numerous, they tend to lose meaning. But I'm by nature a lumper more than a splitter.
posted by bonehead at 12:40 PM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by bonehead at 12:40 PM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
It's worth having names to call things, but when the differences get too small and too numerous, they tend to lose meaning.
I had a tasting of something last weekend and the brewer's representative openly admitted that they created the category of beer on their own for just their one beer to help people understand it wasn't simply an IPA (which is probably why I promptly forgot the category).
posted by srboisvert at 12:43 PM on May 10, 2016
I had a tasting of something last weekend and the brewer's representative openly admitted that they created the category of beer on their own for just their one beer to help people understand it wasn't simply an IPA (which is probably why I promptly forgot the category).
posted by srboisvert at 12:43 PM on May 10, 2016
That's kind of the problem, the IPA marketing category has been a bit poisoned by the hopheads. Lots of folks I know won't buy a beer labelled IPA now because they don't want some IBU 70 bitterer-than-thou kind of brew.
A few of the local brewers have told me the same, they don't want to call something an IPA because they think it hits their sales for the beer.
posted by bonehead at 12:48 PM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
A few of the local brewers have told me the same, they don't want to call something an IPA because they think it hits their sales for the beer.
posted by bonehead at 12:48 PM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
If I'm going to be drinking lager it has to be a true lager, not that mass market shit. Lawnmower beers don't have to be fizzy piss water.
Don't lump all the IPAs together. That's becoming a bit of a cliche here on the Blue and it has grown tiresome. There's tons of moderate or balanced IPAs on the market.
posted by Ber at 1:18 PM on May 10, 2016 [4 favorites]
Don't lump all the IPAs together. That's becoming a bit of a cliche here on the Blue and it has grown tiresome. There's tons of moderate or balanced IPAs on the market.
posted by Ber at 1:18 PM on May 10, 2016 [4 favorites]
Considering who owns Budwiser, wouldn't it be more accurate for the bottles to read "Belgium"?
posted by Itaxpica at 1:20 PM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by Itaxpica at 1:20 PM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
There's tons of moderate or balanced IPAs on the market.
Founder's All Day IPA being one of the best.
posted by grumpybear69 at 1:34 PM on May 10, 2016 [3 favorites]
Founder's All Day IPA being one of the best.
posted by grumpybear69 at 1:34 PM on May 10, 2016 [3 favorites]
It just occurred to me that Kanye should now come out with a beer called "North America."
posted by rhizome at 2:01 PM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by rhizome at 2:01 PM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
As a formerly active alcoholic, I will say that it's relatively easy to drink an enormous number of cans of Budweiser, compared to your fancy hipster beers that taste like beer.
The other thing is drinking 5-6% "fancy" beers, even summer ales all day will get you fucking hammered.
Bud light or raineer or PBR or something though? I can literally drink a case of that all afternoon. It might not be super duper tasty, but dag-nabbit they're perfectly enjoyable to drink on a sunny day in a lawn chair, or on a beach, or while watching a parade or laying in a park or whatever.
Sometimes i wonder how closely tied in with sort of not-that-vague classism the hatred of shitty beer is among hipstery beer people. It's ofter rhetorically indistinguishable from the hatred of convenience food, microwaves, etc. It's not about how healthy or unhealthy it truly is, but the ~aesthetic~ and associations. PBR was cool until it wasn't because it was mass produced and not localvore and farm to table enough. It was cool that it was associated with working class people until it was associated with people of walmart and KFC buckets.
But yea, i got off track. Shitty cheap mass produced beer is fun to drink all day because you wont piss yourself. End of story.
Don't lump all the IPAs together. That's becoming a bit of a cliche here on the Blue and it has grown tiresome. There's tons of moderate or balanced IPAs on the market.
The problem is that there's so many damn IPAs, and that the term IPA doesn't even mean anything anymore. It can be a 4% mild session ale, or some 9% monstertruck palate wrecker(which is literally a real beer, i remembered as i typed that). And when you're at a bar, and they have 15 beers on tap and you don't recognize nearly any of them even if you like beer and mostly pay attention to that, you have no idea what the fuck you're gonna get.
The ridiculous IPAs and the popularity, or at least widely marketed-ness of the super bitter ones has ruined the "brand" of IPA. It literally barely means more than "ale" as a phrase now.
So yes, i think it's completely valid to shit on the super ridiculous ones specifically since they fucked it up for everyone else, and the loudness war effect was absolutely real.
posted by emptythought at 2:24 PM on May 10, 2016 [5 favorites]
The other thing is drinking 5-6% "fancy" beers, even summer ales all day will get you fucking hammered.
Bud light or raineer or PBR or something though? I can literally drink a case of that all afternoon. It might not be super duper tasty, but dag-nabbit they're perfectly enjoyable to drink on a sunny day in a lawn chair, or on a beach, or while watching a parade or laying in a park or whatever.
Sometimes i wonder how closely tied in with sort of not-that-vague classism the hatred of shitty beer is among hipstery beer people. It's ofter rhetorically indistinguishable from the hatred of convenience food, microwaves, etc. It's not about how healthy or unhealthy it truly is, but the ~aesthetic~ and associations. PBR was cool until it wasn't because it was mass produced and not localvore and farm to table enough. It was cool that it was associated with working class people until it was associated with people of walmart and KFC buckets.
But yea, i got off track. Shitty cheap mass produced beer is fun to drink all day because you wont piss yourself. End of story.
Don't lump all the IPAs together. That's becoming a bit of a cliche here on the Blue and it has grown tiresome. There's tons of moderate or balanced IPAs on the market.
The problem is that there's so many damn IPAs, and that the term IPA doesn't even mean anything anymore. It can be a 4% mild session ale, or some 9% monstertruck palate wrecker(which is literally a real beer, i remembered as i typed that). And when you're at a bar, and they have 15 beers on tap and you don't recognize nearly any of them even if you like beer and mostly pay attention to that, you have no idea what the fuck you're gonna get.
The ridiculous IPAs and the popularity, or at least widely marketed-ness of the super bitter ones has ruined the "brand" of IPA. It literally barely means more than "ale" as a phrase now.
So yes, i think it's completely valid to shit on the super ridiculous ones specifically since they fucked it up for everyone else, and the loudness war effect was absolutely real.
posted by emptythought at 2:24 PM on May 10, 2016 [5 favorites]
I heard that as part of the same promotion Bud Light will be renamed Canada.
posted by humanfont at 2:34 PM on May 10, 2016 [8 favorites]
posted by humanfont at 2:34 PM on May 10, 2016 [8 favorites]
Beer for the maybe the most worst American summer ever.
posted by Celsius1414 at 2:45 PM on May 10, 2016
posted by Celsius1414 at 2:45 PM on May 10, 2016
The truly American thing would be to file a trademark registration for "America"
posted by naju at 2:58 PM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by naju at 2:58 PM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
(and once obtained, sue every other company who dares to associate their beer with the country)
posted by naju at 3:03 PM on May 10, 2016
posted by naju at 3:03 PM on May 10, 2016
For nearly my entire adult life I have derisively referred to Budweiser as "American in a can" - It's bland, pale, and just plain uninspiring. I've always rejoiced when my country has aspired to be better than the worst of its' people.
posted by AJScease at 3:10 PM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by AJScease at 3:10 PM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
America: the President of Beers
Yeah well I didn't vote for him
posted by Joey Buttafoucault at 4:00 PM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
Yeah well I didn't vote for him
posted by Joey Buttafoucault at 4:00 PM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
"PBR was cool until it wasn't because it was mass produced and not localvore and farm to table enough. It was cool that it was associated with working class people until it was associated with people of walmart and KFC buckets. "
????
I mean, kinda, but that happened decades ago. The PBR became cool again because it was cheap, and one of the tastier cheap beers. Its cool has gotten more vague now — it's still the can of choice in plenty of hipster "dives," but they also sponsor indie bands and shit in an attempt to maintain that cool, while also raising the price. Which means that they're competing against more mid-shelf beers, and are attempting to transition out of irony into sincere affection for an ersatz zombie brand. They're not uncool enough or cheap enough to like ironically; they're not tasty enough or aesthetically novel enough to be sincerely sought by people with "cool" taste in beer. The ironic drinkers can get Blatz or Schlitz for cheaper, and the quality isn't notably lower; the snobs can get a much, much better beer for like a buck more at most bars (and even less as a six).
PBR's "cool" is a perfect arc of marketing and is a good reminder about the perils of hyperreal authenticity.
posted by klangklangston at 4:33 PM on May 10, 2016 [5 favorites]
????
I mean, kinda, but that happened decades ago. The PBR became cool again because it was cheap, and one of the tastier cheap beers. Its cool has gotten more vague now — it's still the can of choice in plenty of hipster "dives," but they also sponsor indie bands and shit in an attempt to maintain that cool, while also raising the price. Which means that they're competing against more mid-shelf beers, and are attempting to transition out of irony into sincere affection for an ersatz zombie brand. They're not uncool enough or cheap enough to like ironically; they're not tasty enough or aesthetically novel enough to be sincerely sought by people with "cool" taste in beer. The ironic drinkers can get Blatz or Schlitz for cheaper, and the quality isn't notably lower; the snobs can get a much, much better beer for like a buck more at most bars (and even less as a six).
PBR's "cool" is a perfect arc of marketing and is a good reminder about the perils of hyperreal authenticity.
posted by klangklangston at 4:33 PM on May 10, 2016 [5 favorites]
PBR is my favourite cheap beer that can be found easily in Australia (in big half-liter cans), but I don't like that they still use the fish-strangler plastic holders for their sixies, so I don't buy them so much, and when I do I cut the holders apart. Also Budweiser is terrible in every regard.
posted by turbid dahlia at 4:50 PM on May 10, 2016
posted by turbid dahlia at 4:50 PM on May 10, 2016
I don't want to drink something that doesn't taste very good just so I can drink a lot more of it, that also doesn't (apparently) even get you drunk, for the same reason I don't eat rice cakes.
posted by Automocar at 5:06 PM on May 10, 2016
posted by Automocar at 5:06 PM on May 10, 2016
lol get a load of the guy who's never even been drunk on rice cakes
posted by beerperson at 5:10 PM on May 10, 2016 [12 favorites]
posted by beerperson at 5:10 PM on May 10, 2016 [12 favorites]
If I'm mowing the lawn on a hot day, I mow the lawn, drink some water or iced tea or whatever, and then I have the 100+ IBU DIPA afterward. Life hacks.
posted by box at 5:12 PM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by box at 5:12 PM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
I prefer to operate a giant spinning metal blade near my feet while intoxicated, thank you very much.
posted by beerperson at 5:13 PM on May 10, 2016
posted by beerperson at 5:13 PM on May 10, 2016
We ripped out the lawn and put in flowers and ground cover. So I can just sit on the side porch and drink beer and not have to worry about lawn maintenance.
posted by octothorpe at 5:21 PM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by octothorpe at 5:21 PM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
emptythought: "Sometimes i wonder how closely tied in with sort of not-that-vague classism the hatred of shitty beer is among hipstery beer people. It's ofter rhetorically indistinguishable from the hatred of convenience food, microwaves, etc. It's not about how healthy or unhealthy it truly is, but the ~aesthetic~ and associations."
Well, okay, but I really just think Bud tastes like shit. It doesn't taste good up front, and it has a weird metallic aftertaste. I'm fine with cheap beer when appropriate - Yuengling Lager is great, Miller Genuine Draft isn't bad - but Bud products are just lousy.
posted by Chrysostom at 7:27 PM on May 10, 2016
Well, okay, but I really just think Bud tastes like shit. It doesn't taste good up front, and it has a weird metallic aftertaste. I'm fine with cheap beer when appropriate - Yuengling Lager is great, Miller Genuine Draft isn't bad - but Bud products are just lousy.
posted by Chrysostom at 7:27 PM on May 10, 2016
The PBR became cool again because it was cheap, and one of the tastier cheap beers.
I always say, PBR became cool because of Frank Booth and David Lynch and nothing else. It's qualitatively, economically, and functionally identical to several other brands. Most of its "fans" couldn't pick it out in a blind taste test against other brands.
But only one of these brands was name-checked in a gritty, ironic, indie, critical darling movie as the preferred beverage of a psychopathic-yet-darkly-humorous character.
If Frank Booth had said, "Heineken? Fuck that shit! Old Milwaukee!" no hipster would've ever touched PBR.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 7:39 PM on May 10, 2016 [5 favorites]
I always say, PBR became cool because of Frank Booth and David Lynch and nothing else. It's qualitatively, economically, and functionally identical to several other brands. Most of its "fans" couldn't pick it out in a blind taste test against other brands.
But only one of these brands was name-checked in a gritty, ironic, indie, critical darling movie as the preferred beverage of a psychopathic-yet-darkly-humorous character.
If Frank Booth had said, "Heineken? Fuck that shit! Old Milwaukee!" no hipster would've ever touched PBR.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 7:39 PM on May 10, 2016 [5 favorites]
"Founder's All Day IPA being one of the best." Favorited just for brand approval. I'm having one right now, and yup, it's delicious. I actually love more aggressively hoppy beers too, but this is a classic (also entropicamericana's law holds true in this thread, as expected).
If I'm drinking cheap canned beer anyway, I prefer Bud to Pabst, Coors, or Yuengling, despite the former's decades-long shitty advertising. One thing I think you've got to hand to them, there really isn't another beer on the market that tastes that much like Bud. Probably all the rice.
For a lot of people that's a "thank goodness" sort of moment, but I've always appreciated being able to pick them out in a blind beer taste test, and there are times when that's exactly what I want. I like that weird metallic aftertaste--it hits the same part of my palate as some dry white wines.
posted by aspersioncast at 8:10 PM on May 10, 2016
If I'm drinking cheap canned beer anyway, I prefer Bud to Pabst, Coors, or Yuengling, despite the former's decades-long shitty advertising. One thing I think you've got to hand to them, there really isn't another beer on the market that tastes that much like Bud. Probably all the rice.
For a lot of people that's a "thank goodness" sort of moment, but I've always appreciated being able to pick them out in a blind beer taste test, and there are times when that's exactly what I want. I like that weird metallic aftertaste--it hits the same part of my palate as some dry white wines.
posted by aspersioncast at 8:10 PM on May 10, 2016
I'm all about PBR, Rainier, Hamms, Old German, Rolling Rock, and Montucky (which seems to have come up out of no where). Cheap beer is cheap for a reason, and considering peoples' paychecks are being eaten up more and more by increasing rents and other expenses then those beers are fulfilling a very valuable role. Coors and Budweiser are expensive, routinely $7 or more for a 6-pack, and are often $4 at a bar.
I still drink nice beers here and there, but if I'm going out for a night with my group of friends, hitting up the bar and watching basketball, there's no way I'm down to drop $20 to drink a few beers, especially when the fouls start getting pulled in the 4th quarter, and ESPECIALLY if shit goes into overtime.
I've gotten really into sours lately. I agree with a lot of the criticisms of IPAs, and I still try to find ones I'll enjoy, but a lot of places have the same options. Nowadays if I'm going to intentionally hit the bar to only have a few drinks to sip on I go to a sour beer brewery, but that's just my taste these days.
posted by gucci mane at 10:02 PM on May 10, 2016
I still drink nice beers here and there, but if I'm going out for a night with my group of friends, hitting up the bar and watching basketball, there's no way I'm down to drop $20 to drink a few beers, especially when the fouls start getting pulled in the 4th quarter, and ESPECIALLY if shit goes into overtime.
I've gotten really into sours lately. I agree with a lot of the criticisms of IPAs, and I still try to find ones I'll enjoy, but a lot of places have the same options. Nowadays if I'm going to intentionally hit the bar to only have a few drinks to sip on I go to a sour beer brewery, but that's just my taste these days.
posted by gucci mane at 10:02 PM on May 10, 2016
We thought nothing was more iconic than Budweiser and nothing was more iconic than America
Jesus fucking christ. This is a statement that would annoy the hell out of Vulcans. I think I may be a Vulcan.
posted by juiceCake at 10:10 PM on May 10, 2016
Jesus fucking christ. This is a statement that would annoy the hell out of Vulcans. I think I may be a Vulcan.
posted by juiceCake at 10:10 PM on May 10, 2016
America: the President of Beers
Yeah well I didn't vote for him
"Don't blame me, I voted for MGD?"
posted by Ghidorah at 10:31 PM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
Yeah well I didn't vote for him
"Don't blame me, I voted for MGD?"
posted by Ghidorah at 10:31 PM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]
"Don't blame me, I voted for cider."
posted by rhizome at 10:33 PM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by rhizome at 10:33 PM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]
As a lifelong Bud drinker, I recommend you sample it again. The InBev acquisition seems to have fine tuned the recipe more toward the Stella/Pilsner Urquell range of Bohemian lagers, and might just surprise you. Also: aluminum bottles.
posted by halfbuckaroo at 3:05 AM on May 11, 2016
posted by halfbuckaroo at 3:05 AM on May 11, 2016
you realize, of course, that every time one of you metafilter peeps diss bud, there's a True American out there that becomes even more determined to vote for Trump.
When there's orange hair in the whitehouse, I'm blaming y'all for it.
posted by HuronBob at 4:38 AM on May 11, 2016
When there's orange hair in the whitehouse, I'm blaming y'all for it.
posted by HuronBob at 4:38 AM on May 11, 2016
As a lifelong Bud drinker, I recommend you sample it again
Hmmm.
How about no.
posted by Mezentian at 6:22 AM on May 11, 2016
Hmmm.
How about no.
posted by Mezentian at 6:22 AM on May 11, 2016
As a lifelong Bud drinker, I recommend you sample it again
I might, but it would require a garish t-shirt, or a silly hat with a reflective vizor, or a coozie in addition to really clinch the deal.
posted by octobersurprise at 8:06 AM on May 11, 2016
I might, but it would require a garish t-shirt, or a silly hat with a reflective vizor, or a coozie in addition to really clinch the deal.
posted by octobersurprise at 8:06 AM on May 11, 2016
Of Course Donald Trump Is Taking Credit for Budweiser's New Name
posted by octothorpe at 8:11 AM on May 11, 2016
posted by octothorpe at 8:11 AM on May 11, 2016
As a lifelong Bud drinker, I recommend you sample it again
Found the InBev sales rep.
But no, seriously, just coincidentally I did just drink a few Budweisers the other week (I'm not necessarily proud of this, but they were on sale at my local, even cheaper than Coors), and I have to vehemently disagree with this idea that they retooled it to be more like Stella / Urquell. It is still absolutely the blandest macro lager. Sometimes I'm OK with this! The more prominent flavor of PBR, for example, is not necessarily a good thing after the third can. So Bud is easier drinking if that's your goal; no contest. But it's nothing like a real Bohemian Pils.
posted by Joey Buttafoucault at 2:11 PM on May 11, 2016
Found the InBev sales rep.
But no, seriously, just coincidentally I did just drink a few Budweisers the other week (I'm not necessarily proud of this, but they were on sale at my local, even cheaper than Coors), and I have to vehemently disagree with this idea that they retooled it to be more like Stella / Urquell. It is still absolutely the blandest macro lager. Sometimes I'm OK with this! The more prominent flavor of PBR, for example, is not necessarily a good thing after the third can. So Bud is easier drinking if that's your goal; no contest. But it's nothing like a real Bohemian Pils.
posted by Joey Buttafoucault at 2:11 PM on May 11, 2016
Very few beers smell like Bud, which is why it always reminds me of my dad giving me a sip when I was 5 and me thinking it was gross.
posted by rhizome at 2:32 PM on May 11, 2016
posted by rhizome at 2:32 PM on May 11, 2016
I might, but it would require a garish t-shirt, or a silly hat with a reflective vizor, or a coozie in addition to really clinch the deal.
Ah, that's the Metafilter classism/snobbery I've been longing for!
posted by naju at 2:53 PM on May 11, 2016
Ah, that's the Metafilter classism/snobbery I've been longing for!
posted by naju at 2:53 PM on May 11, 2016
a coozie
Whoa there! Say what you will about garish clothing, visors, or other assorted accoutrements, but mock not the coozie. Not every beer is meant to be drunk room temperature, especially when room temperature in the summer on the patio is in the 90s. The coozie is your friend, and wishes you were just a bit nicer to it.
posted by Ghidorah at 2:56 PM on May 11, 2016
Whoa there! Say what you will about garish clothing, visors, or other assorted accoutrements, but mock not the coozie. Not every beer is meant to be drunk room temperature, especially when room temperature in the summer on the patio is in the 90s. The coozie is your friend, and wishes you were just a bit nicer to it.
posted by Ghidorah at 2:56 PM on May 11, 2016
Haters gonna hate but at least Budweiser is union-made.
posted by mostly vowels at 5:52 PM on May 11, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by mostly vowels at 5:52 PM on May 11, 2016 [1 favorite]
Ah, that's the Metafilter classism/snobbery I've been longing for!
Delighted to provide. Now if you'll excuse me my hipster manservant is decanting another organic nanobrew.
posted by octobersurprise at 7:15 PM on May 11, 2016 [1 favorite]
Delighted to provide. Now if you'll excuse me my hipster manservant is decanting another organic nanobrew.
posted by octobersurprise at 7:15 PM on May 11, 2016 [1 favorite]
MAD Magazine (another American icon that seems well past its expiration date) offers "A More Truthful Redesign"
posted by oneswellfoop at 11:17 PM on May 11, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by oneswellfoop at 11:17 PM on May 11, 2016 [1 favorite]
Delighted to provide. Now if you'll excuse me my hipster manservant is decanting another organic nanobrew.
I mean, I guess nanobrews are drinkable if you don't know about nilbrews. So exclusive they don't exist yet and are immediately rendered undrinkable if created.
posted by Celsius1414 at 2:58 PM on May 12, 2016 [1 favorite]
I mean, I guess nanobrews are drinkable if you don't know about nilbrews. So exclusive they don't exist yet and are immediately rendered undrinkable if created.
posted by Celsius1414 at 2:58 PM on May 12, 2016 [1 favorite]
The certainty of nilbrew is for posers! I only drink quantumbrews, which may or may not exist and may or may not be delicious.
posted by rhizome at 7:09 PM on May 12, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by rhizome at 7:09 PM on May 12, 2016 [2 favorites]
Thanks to Mr. Fig, we now own a 12-pack of America.
He was in St Louis this weekend, and ordered a 'Budweiser. I mean, America'. The waitress replied with 'OK, one America' with no sense of sarcasm or irony, so this is actually a thing, at least in Bud's hometown.
posted by Fig at 6:06 PM on May 29, 2016
He was in St Louis this weekend, and ordered a 'Budweiser. I mean, America'. The waitress replied with 'OK, one America' with no sense of sarcasm or irony, so this is actually a thing, at least in Bud's hometown.
posted by Fig at 6:06 PM on May 29, 2016
I'm a little surprised no one has mentioned this beer.
posted by Chrysostom at 10:22 PM on May 29, 2016
posted by Chrysostom at 10:22 PM on May 29, 2016
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